I can't do this

LegacyUser

Was dumped by my girlfriend recently. We hadn't been going out too long, only about 7 months. But i am absolutly devestated at the moment. I can't take this. Been to the doctor cos i am so depressed, he has put me on anti depressents and i don't feel any better. Gotta go back in a couple of days for a check up.

I can't think of anything else bar her and things we had done or were planning on doing. I just miss her so much, i feel like my head is about to explode from all the thoughts. I can't sit still cos my mind is racing the whole time. I just can't do this

jellie

youll be devastated for awhile, its only natural. Im sure youve heard it before & i know it sounds stupid but it just takes time.

try keep yourself busy, meet up with friends, etc, keep yourself distracted. if you wanna have a cry have a cry & let it out.

it will eventually get easier, but you will hurt for awhile

axer

sodown wrote: »

Was dumped by my girlfriend recently. We hadn't been going out too long, only about 7 months. But i am absolutly devestated at the moment. I can't take this. Been to the doctor cos i am so depressed, he has put me on anti depressents and i don't feel any better. Gotta go back in a couple of days for a check up.

I can't think of anything else bar her and things we had done or were planning on doing. I just miss her so much, i feel like my head is about to explode from all the thoughts. I can't sit still cos my mind is racing the whole time. I just can't do this

You need something to focus on. How about taking up the gym or something.

LegacyUser

sar84 wrote: »

youll be devastated for awhile, its only natural. Im sure youve heard it before & i know it sounds stupid but it just takes time.

try keep yourself busy, meet up with friends, etc, keep yourself distracted. if you wanna have a cry have a cry & let it out.

it will eventually get easier, but you will hurt for awhile

I've just been constantly upset, i can't take my mind of it at all. And to be honest, i don't feel like i can at the moment. I can't eat cos i feel so sick from it all. I'm not even sleeping properly. I've had a relationship which was much much longer than what this was and i wasn't as bad as this

Beaucoupfish

Don't take drugs to get over your girlfriend. It is devastating. Give it time and you'll get over it. It's a natural process. It's a cliche but there are more fish in the sea.

Wibbs

Unfortunately at this point you only want that fish. It will pass. It will not feel like it now. But it will. You won't get through it by numbing yourself. That brings it's own problems on top of the other feelings.

Realise that you're grieving at the moment. It's very similar to a death. Realise also that this will hurt and hurt for a while. You will have bad days, but sooner or later you will start to have good moments that'll turn into good hours and days and weeks. The rest of your life starts here.

See what your doc says and see are there other avenues you can explore with counseling etc.

Good luck.

bored and tired

Hi op,

Doctors dont perscribe antidepressants for just heart ache, listen to your doc, it will take time for the tablets full effect to kick in. Depression is nothing to be ashamed about, ask about councelling and take up some exercise. Exercise will release endorphins to help lift your mood and help you sleep better, Do not stop taking the tablets without your docs knowledge.

i know its hard but you have to look to the future and concentrate on whats happening next week, next month, and before you know it the weeks and months start to blend together and you will be back out there enjoying life.

star-pants

OP I can only echo what others have said - but I know that means nothing to you at the moment. Right now all you care about and want is her. And it hurts like hell, everything around you reminds you of her, she occupies all your thoughts and it just stabs you every time.

Trust me I know exactly how you're feeling, I was the same after a guy broke up with me before, and I got myself into an awful hole - and it's taken me nearly a year to break the surface again. But I wasn't helping myself.
You *need* to create new memories with friends, you *need* things to laugh about, as Wibbs said, soon you'll have a few good moments and that will brighten one of your dark days. Then there'll be more and you'll find maybe a week has gone by where you've felt a bit better. No one can pull you out but you. You'll fall deeper if you let yourself.
I know its so very hard to do, but for yourself you must hun.

Find something that gets you out - don't leave yourself alone for long hours at a time, that doesn't help. If you need to cry - do, lord knows I cried my eyes out for months.
Maybe go to the gym, or comedy gigs (I started doing that and it did help me feel better, even if only for a few hours) or a class. The only way you can move forward is if you push yourself. I know it feels like 'whats the point' cuz nothing feels like it means anything anymore. And I know I never believed it at the time, but things do and will get better, but only if you let it.
Remember you are still a wonderful bright person - and have a life to live, and if you have bad moments, you can come here, there's always people here.
*hug*

wylo

sodown wrote: »

Was dumped by my girlfriend recently. We hadn't been going out too long, only about 7 months. But i am absolutly devestated at the moment. I can't take this. Been to the doctor cos i am so depressed, he has put me on anti depressents and i don't feel any better. Gotta go back in a couple of days for a check up.

I can't think of anything else bar her and things we had done or were planning on doing. I just miss her so much, i feel like my head is about to explode from all the thoughts. I can't sit still cos my mind is racing the whole time. I just can't do this

Unfortunately you just have to sit it out, we've all been there. Why do you think theres so many movies , songs and programs on tv about this topic, everyone can relate to it. you'll be in a dark world for a while but things do change

FearDark

sodown wrote: »

I can't think of anything else bar her and things we had done or were planning on doing. I just miss her so much, i feel like my head is about to explode from all the thoughts. I can't sit still cos my mind is racing the whole time. I just can't do this

Dude, what your experiencing is totally normal, believe me i've been there and back. I couldnt eat, sleep, drink, see anyone or talk about it for months... It sucks man, all you need is time and to keep yourself busy. Let it out, go have a cry about it, its natural. There are no remedies for heartbeak unfortunately... I really wished there was.

useful_contacts

sodown wrote: »

Was dumped by my girlfriend recently. We hadn't been going out too long, only about 7 months. But i am absolutly devestated at the moment. I can't take this. Been to the doctor cos i am so depressed, he has put me on anti depressents and i don't feel any better. Gotta go back in a couple of days for a check up.

I can't think of anything else bar her and things we had done or were planning on doing. I just miss her so much, i feel like my head is about to explode from all the thoughts. I can't sit still cos my mind is racing the whole time. I just can't do this

Im sorry hun, break ups are horrible i know, and its annoying when all you want is to contact them and you know you cant. Theres nothing i can say to make it any easier cos all i used to do after a break up is go out and get floored and that didnt help one bit.

If it helps make a list of things you HATED about her read it whenever your feeling down

Hope it helps

LegacyUser

Thanks for all the replies. It's good to be able to talk here, especially seeing as she's not on here.

I have been trying to keep myself busy, not with much success tho. My friends are useless for doing anything apart from going drinking a tthe weekends!! We met up one night a few days ago to give back each others stuff. Found it very tough. She got upset aswell which isn't helping my head! She seems confused about everything in her life at the moment, which makes me think she might have doubts, but it's not far on myself to keep thinking like that. We are still talking a small bit, few texts here and there but that's all. Probably better that we aren't talking much

LegacyUser

GTA IV. Seriously. I find immersing myself in a different reality for a bit the best way to completely distract myself from a break up.

MrVestek

Op, I feel you're pain. I'm getting over a breakup at the moment myself too. She wouldn't talk to me for a few weeks and I couldn't stop thinking about her, re-running over and over in my mind things we had done or were planning to do, conversations that we'd had etc...

The horrible thing was it went from being quite an intense relationship one day to two days later her breaking up with me and then for ages she'd barely talk to me. We just had a chat on MSN one day and she let it all out. I won't go into details but basically it was a communication problem.

Felt much better after that chat, but of course her being a bitch to me since and finding out that she's shagging someone now who's supposed to be a mate has helped me get over her alot. But still anyways point I'm getting at is yes, unfortunately you will feel this way for a while and no one can tell you how long it'll last because it's different for everyone else.

Just do what I did, go out with mates have a few drinks and have a laugh just don't overdo it. You never know, you might even get lucky!

Have you talked to her about it at all? Was the breakup out of the blue? Did she give you any explaination? I find closure helps *alot* in these situations.

Wibbs

Achilles wrote: »

Have you talked to her about it at all? Was the breakup out of the blue? Did she give you any explaination? I find closure helps *alot* in these situations.

Good advice. Learn as much about you, her, the relationship and it[s demise as much as possible. breakups rarely happen out of the blue, for no reason. There's always a reason, even if it's just simply they fancied someone else more than you. You will go through the mill, but you can learn from it. It's the best time to learn about yourself in many ways.

MrVestek

Wibbs wrote: »

It's the best time to learn about yourself in many ways.

That's so true, very very good advice.

LegacyUser

hi Op,

Breaks up are so hard, I'm just about getting over my last one a year on. Do you know why you broke up? That was the hardest part I found was the shock and the lack of understanding how things go from fine to over in such a short space of time. My ex also cut contact which didnt help. A week later he met up with me but I was going crazy in that time, presuming it meant he was with someone else. it turns out he was but was too ashamed to tell me.

I'm not saying that is what happened with your situation but getting questions answers always helps

Hope things are slowly getting better for you and good luck