What was that?

LegacyUser

Iam 27y/o and am getting married in 5 weeks time.
The other day I was in my GF's home place waiting to collect her after work. I was in the sitting room alone rolling a fag when her older sister walked in. Without saying a word she lifted her top and flashed her boobs at me then smiled. Tbh I was like a goldfish, didnt know what to say or do. Half a minute went by and she just left the room.
I didnt say anything to her then or since.
I havent said anything to my gf either.
I am just confused, why would she do that? Before anyone says 'She meant nothing by it' or 'It was just to shock you' etc imagine if I had flashed my knob at her and what the general reaction would be.
Should I tell my GF or just forget about it?

denhaagenite

I'm all up for you telling ur gf, but my fella says forget about it. I'd want to know. What a horrible horrible person. Is she on drugs?

cowzerp

Maybe tell her next time that you dont want a repeat performance, that was a set up or something..

jenga-jen

o...m...g!?

seriously, that's not on!!

You need to talk to your gf/fiancee about this. Normally I'd say approach the sister but if she's acting a 'little' oddly, just cover your ass and talk directly to your gf.

Playing devil's advocate: maybe in some warped way she was testing you?
To see if you'd try it on? But holy sh1t if she was it's totly messed up.

Just say it to your gf. You don't want her to find out about it later and know that you never said anything. That in itself would prolly cause you more problems.

LadyJ

I'd say just leave it but if she does it again then tell your girlfriend. The sister is acting like a right dope tbh and as you said, if it had been the other way around the reaction would have been a lot different. Why should you have to be subjected to that kinda crap?

Also, tell the sister never to pull that crap again. Not really very funny and extremely inappropriate.

Sherifu

It does seem a bit strange. Does the girl have any mental problems?

kaimera

but if it was some sorta test and he doesn't tell her...

weird situation OP. Least she didn't jump yer bones like a few of the PI threads

Dave!

Sounds good!

I'd forget about it, but if she does anything like that again and you're not comfortable with it (ie. she's a minger), then say it to the girlfriend.

is she hot?

garthv

Were they nice tits?

LadyJ

kaimera wrote: »

but if it was some sorta test and he doesn't tell her...

Very unlikely to be a test unless the gf is a bit of a lunatic. I don't know many people who would want their fiancee to get an eyefull of their sister's breasts, or in this case, ask their sister to flash their fiancee.

LegacyUser

The two sisters have never really got on well together, they have just spent the last 5 months not talking to each other ffs. The older sis has a b/f but he is a bit of a waster. The future mum-in-law pulls out the china when I call over, the other guy is lucky to get cold tea in a jam-jar. I know this isn't fair but that is the way it is.
I would just like get opinions from other gals. WHY would she do this? I supose the face on me might have been worth it. Just wish I could have said something appropriate. How should I treat this girl from here on - Act like it never happened? Ask her? Tell my GF? Ignore or cold-shoulder her? I dont know. My internal radar tells me there is a major sh*tstorm on the horizon and all just before our wedding.

Miss Fluff

Let is pass, if she does it again though tell you GF.

Bog Man

If a woman flashes her breasts could this young man not reasonably take it as a 'pass' at him? A crude pass albeit.
The chip you steal from another's plate is the tastiest of all.

Marksie

Two words: Shock value

LadyJ

OP, who cares why she did it? Who knows tbh! The point is you didn't entertain her childish behaviour so you can't be blamed for anything. Tell your gf if you like but no "sh!t storm" is coming because there's no need for one! You and your gf should ignore this crap and get on with your lives. Don't let such a stupid thing cause a problem.

Bog Man

Marksie wrote: »

Two words: Shock value

If she was a teenager I might agree.

I would tell the g/f straight up, why cover up for this one?

wylo

Bog Man wrote: »

If she was a teenager I might agree.

I would tell the g/f straight up, why cover up for this one?

+1
Only problem is that is might cause **** before the wedding.

If that happened me I would probably burst out laughing and ask what the hell is she doing, she sounds like a bit of a nutcase

Kazobel

What was that? wrote: »

The two sisters have never really got on well together, they have just spent the last 5 months not talking to each other ffs. The older sis has a b/f but he is a bit of a waster. The future mum-in-law pulls out the china when I call over, the other guy is lucky to get cold tea in a jam-jar. I know this isn't fair but that is the way it is.
I would just like get opinions from other gals. WHY would she do this? I supose the face on me might have been worth it. Just wish I could have said something appropriate. How should I treat this girl from here on - Act like it never happened? Ask her? Tell my GF? Ignore or cold-shoulder her? I dont know. My internal radar tells me there is a major sh*tstorm on the horizon and all just before our wedding.

After reading this I'd be inclined to think that she's competing with her sister, maybe she jealous and is trying to fcuk up the wedding and quite possibly your girl-friends happiness. I'd leave it for now as it may have just been a jealous spur of the moment thing where she had an opportunity to get one up on your GF and just took it but if it happens again say it to your GF

vandermeyde

Personally, I'd cover my bases and mention it to your fiance. This is the kind of thing that could be thrown in the mix the next time they have an argument and it'll reflect badly on you if SHE says it to her rather than you.

I'd keep my distance from her from now on, she sounds like a troublemaker.

Marksie

GarthV off toipic posting will get you banned from this forum. Please read the charter

Drummerboy2

I agree with the above post. Tread very carefully. She sounds as if she would do anything to mess up your GFs wedding.

BaZmO*

Marksie wrote: »

Two words: Shock value

Two words: Nut Job!

I was going to say don't say anything to your girlfriend as it might cause too much trouble, especially with the wedding coming up, but as seen as they're not talking anyway I'd say something to her just to let her know what the psycho is doing.

Loomis

I'd say definitely tell your fiancé. But try to keep it and her as calm as possible and say if needs be you can discuss it more and/or both approach the sister about it but after the wedding! To be honest she sounds a bit cracked in the head. There's no way your fiancé asked her to test you, well not in that way anyway. You should know this without us having to tell you since you're the one who knows. So the only explanation is it was to tempt you. She could have wanted to do something with you or merely just once you reacted she'd be happy, walk off and have ammunition to throw at her sister which it seems very likely is her aim. The only reason you'd do that so close to a wedding (or anytime for that matter) is to compete.
I'd strongly suggest you tell your fiancé though because if the sister's aim is to cause trouble I wouldn't put it past her 'drunkenly bringing it up' at the wedding as it stands.

Dizzyblonde

If you don't tell your girlfriend, you'll have a secret with her sister and you definitely don't want that. Also, if she's as nasty as you say she is, she could use it against you to cause trouble in the future.

BaZmO*

Also, if she is as bad as you say she is surely this won't come as too much of a surprise to your financy?

Oryx

Based on the bad blood between the sisters, Id say she was just having a laugh at your expense. It doesnt sound like a carefully thought out plan to wreck your wedding. If you tell your gf and make a big deal out of it the sister will probably think thats hilarious.

She may see you as a goody two shoes and wanted to temporarily shake you up.

Radharc na Sleibhte

What kind of person does that kind of thing????
It's incredibly strange. She must be demented.
I'd have told your fiancee straight away.
The longer you leave it, the harder it gets.

FakeRedHead

I would tell your gf now to cover yourself.

And if there's going to be a showdown better to have it now than the night before the wedding.
The sister might throw it at your gf then (if she's really appalling) and you'll look very bad for not having mentioned it before.

At the moment you have a secret with the sister. Not good.

Sprouts

If your gonna marry this girl you must tell her, no secrets ever. Some women can be so nasty and evil to each other, wouldn't be surprised if she pulled this rabbit out of the bag on your wedding night. Tell your girl now, and have a happy wedding.

bronte

If it were me I'd tell your gf.
It could potentially seem like a big deal if you keep it to yourself.
Her sis sounds a bit weird, and could have hatched this plan to see how you'd react.
It was well out of line and like someone else said, if you were the one doing the flashing there'd be uproar.
You owe this girl nothing, tell your gf.

SarahSassy

What was that? wrote: »

I would just like get opinions from other gals. WHY would she do this?

Cos she is unstable and probably has jealous issues relating to your fiancee... Dont give her the opportunity to do it again and tell your fiancee when she is your wife No point causing hassle before the wedding.

Oryx

I know of a lady (mature, but lots of fun) who used to do this at very respectable gatherings, the type where the men were in one corner and the women in the other. She did it for the shock it created, to make the men splutter into their pints, she got a kick out of it. It was a nuts thing to do, but hell, it was funny. Not quite the same, but illustrates the kind of mindset that can be behind it.

By all means tell your gf, it is the right thing to do. But tell her in an offhand way. Laugh it off as a stupid joke. I think the last thing you want is for her to tear off and confront her sister and try to pull her hair out. Bet the sister thrives on such confrontation, but you dont need a family rift 5 weeks away from a wedding.

sunnyjim

Hey man

Tell your fiance.

You have nothing to lose by telling her, and it shouldn't affect your wedding.

As one poster put it, you don't want her to start trouble at the wedding by bringing it up. This girl is obviously an odd one.

And even if you never come back to read this thread, congrats, and I hope the wedding goes swimmingly

Dudess

OP, it's a tricky one. What if you tell her fiancée and her sister denies it? Then again your fiancée wants to marry you, therefore she's bound to trust you. But if you tell her sister and there's absolute war, it could have serious consequences for the wedding day. Drink loosens the tongue and things can get messy. What about having a word with the sister? Just to make it clear you have no tolerance for that crap. And maybe saying it to your fiancée after the wedding? Preparing for her wedding is gonna be stressful enough without this.

DaveMcG wrote: »

Sounds good!

Very "helpful".

I'd forget about it, but if she does anything like that again and you're not comfortable with it (ie. she's a minger), then say it to the girlfriend.

The guy didn't post "Everyone, how lucky was I last night when my fiancée's sis flashed her tits!" This isn't After Hours, it's actually a problem for him. As for not being comfortable with it due to her being a "minger" - she might actually be good-looking and yet, shock horror, he might still be uncomfortable with it considering he's getting married to her sister. Some guys actually have such boundaries - not all males veer in the knucklehead direction.

is she hot?

Ultra "helpful" again. Think you got your forums mixed up.

McGinty

My internal radar tells me there is a major sh*tstorm on the horizon and all just before our wedding

Hi Op, I'd listen to that inner radar, you know the situation better than any of us posters, but it sounds like the sister who flashed is very resentful of your financee and was hoping you'd crack on to her, basically she has transgressed boundaries between sisters and in my opinion I think that is disgraceful. Personally I would tell you fiancee because she may be angry if she finds out at a later time, but point out that her sister is probably jealous of her, she also sounds very troubled plus choosing waster like men might add to that.

Dampsquid

I don't understand what's stopping you from telling your girlfriend what happened.....

Loopy

I agree with McGinty, I think the sister was looking for a reaction and hoping you would jump her.. From what you have said they seem to have a fairly volatile relationship and what better way to get at her sister than to destroy your relationship.

Tell your GF, your conscience will be clear, not that you have anything to hide but if its brought up in the future (which no doubt it will )at least you have been honest with her. Expect a big row but it will be out in the open.

Chinafoot

So, your fiance and her sister have been not speaking for 5 months and you are seen as the golden boy compared to her sister's boyfriend.

I'd guess the sister is trying to **** with her sister's upcoming nuptials. She's probably hoping you'll tell her just so she can get a reaction. I wouldn't go down the "she wants me" road.

Tell your girlfriend what she did but tell her to pass no heed, that you think it's all pretty pathetic. Don't let the sister get the reaction she's obviously looking for.

Lurvely

Definitely tell her..if my sister did that to my fiance then id want to know, and if he didnt tell me & i found out after then that would be bad for him!! Shes obviously trying to cause rows, dont let her. Be honest and open with your girlfriend, at least then yous wont have any problems, you did nothing wrong here. try to get your girlfriend to ignore it though because id say her sister is just looking for a fight.

AARRRGH

It's five weeks before your wedding. It sounds like the jealous older sister is trying to sabotage it.

I don't know if you should tell your girlfriend (difficult one...) but I defo think you need to avoid the sister entirely. Who knows what she'll do next?

AARRRGH

Dampsquid wrote: »

I don't understand what's stopping you from telling your girlfriend what happened.....

The sister will deny it and say he made a move on her?

Seriously, this girl could do anything to save face, so I think there is a genuine risk of a lot of **** hitting the fan just before their wedding.

I think postponing any reaction until after the wedding is the safest option...

LegacyUser

She probably did it just to stir sh*t.
As a girl myself.... I honestly have no idea how anyone could do such a thing. Especially to a sister's boyfriend... she sounds very immature and definitely not all there.
There are so many different angles at looking at this, but whatever the case, the sister has gone way out of line and is possibly very jealous of your fiance and you (and the whole thing about their mum liking you more than her boyfriend etc)...
If you tell your fiance, of course there's the posibility of a bit of an argument occuring... but if I was about to get married to someone, I'd prefer to know now, than getting married and hearing it from my sister down the line (as then, I'd be thinking why wasn't I told etc)... which could probably happen if the sister is like this. +if you say it now... it won't be hanging over you etc...
You could just ask the sister out straight (as if it didn't bother you+ it's clear she has a screw loose), why on earth she did it. It would be interesting to see how she would react.
As it's a bit of a divided opinion, you could always just show your future wife this thread.

AARRRGH

Serious question:

Does the sister have larger or "nicer" boobs than your girlfriend?

It could be some bizarre "show him what he's missing" move.

Just a thought...

LegacyUser

As the sister appears to be quite malicious, I think it would be good to tell your fiance to get it out in the open now. She can hardly be mad with you for wanting no secrets between both of you.

Chinafoot

dublindude wrote:

Just a thought...

Or...it could be a bitchy older sister who is fighting with the OP's fiance and wants to stick the knife in. They haven't been speaking for 5 months, that is quite a while for family, so I seriously doubt that the fiance is going to believe her sister if she claims he made a pass.

OP, has the sister ever shown any attraction to you before this? I genuinely don't think she's doing it to try and snare you for herself. It sounds like you're being used in some little game she's playing to mess with her sister.

Yes, the wedding is coming up soon, but you should definitely tell your fiance what happened. If this girl is as spiteful as she seems to be then she might tell her herself and then you'll be in a whole world of trouble.

Tell her. You did nothing wrong. Just laugh it off and tell her how shocked you were.

LegacyUser

maybe tell their dad and say i dont wan't a to upset the gf but you should know etc...

AARRRGH

Chinafoot wrote: »

I seriously doubt that the fiance is going to believe her sister if she claims he made a pass.

Sure, but her mother and father might. Seriously, parents generally believe their kids, even for mad ****...

With the wedding around the corner, conflict avoidance should be the game IMO.

Chinafoot

dublindude wrote: »

Sure, but her mother and father might. Seriously, parents generally believe their kids, even for mad ****...

And? They're getting married so I'm going to assume they're adults. Do you really believe that her parents would stop her over something like this? If two of their children haven't been speaking for almost half a year you can be guaranteed the parents are aware of it. There's also a very good chance that they will know what each daughter is like (and you can be definitely guaranteed that the OP's fiance will know *exactly* what her sister is capable of). The parents would be a non-issue imo.

dublindude wrote: »

With the wedding around the corner, conflict avoidance should be the game IMO.

Honesty with the woman he's marrying should be the game tbh.

And what happens if the darling sister decides to let this slip on the wedding day? Or decides to exaggerate what actually happened? Then the OP tells her what really happened. Do you really think she'd be cool with that when he never even mentioned it before? Why did he feel the need to keep it a secret? If what he said happened happened he has nothing to worry about. Why hide it?

Keeping schtum to avoid conflict in what, by the sounds of things, isn't a great relationship anyway is foolish and could come back to bite the OP in the ass majorly.

tampopo

What was that? wrote: »

the other guy is lucky to get cold tea in a jam-jar.

This definitely made me laugh out loud.

Tell your fiancee. don't let it hang. It will out in the end, that is a 100% guarantee.

post 22 and 24 are good advice too.

I wouldn't worry about the last previous post, Chinafoot, I think. If it comes out in the wash, you're A1 in the parents' eyes, china cups and all. You and her are responsible adults sealing your relationship with a wedding. The sister is .... bringing home wasters and losers. Her reputation, in choosing men at least, is not great.

Tell, get it off your conscience. Laugh it off. But don't hold it in, no good will come of it. Your mrs. (very soon to be) or a slacker SIL, that your OH hasn't bothered to have a convo with for 5 months? You'll be fine, don't worry, though you probably know that already, and more than any of us here..

good luck...


Sorry about that. Chinafoot is giving good advice, ignore DublinDude

Gemini Sister

Have just read your opening post OP. May read other comments now in awhile but... first thoughts: no need to go running to the gf on this one.

You're marrying into the family ffs. Don't stir shiite. The sister may spend the rest of her life cringing over the boob flash as it is. Do you want the girlies fighting? Does nobody understand the word 'discretion' anymore? ...'This too shall pass' and all that... now I think I'll go back and read the other comments for the craic.

Gemini Sister

Ok. Have read all comments & thought it through a bit.

IMO the girl wasn't being 'sexy' with you necessarily... was being a offensive and rude & looking for a shock reaction... Maybe looking for you to go running to her sister?

But in the bigger scheme of things, what really happened here? She flashed, you didn't react.
The girl was LOOKIN FOR A REACTION, clearly, and quite possibly not a sexual one. I'd call that done & dusted already. For all the sis knows you've already spilled the beans and nobody gives a toss. Therefore the 'ploy' failed.
Nice one. Fair play to you