Flatmates...grrr!

Teddi

ok, this isnt a huge problem but today it just really ****ing ticked me off.

I live with 2 other guys in my flat, there was 3 but he moved out (I one I liked the most!) Anyway, there real boy's boys, you know? beer, footy, blah blah..now I do like my drink to but in no means catagorized as one of them (cant stand football...dont treat my women like crap etc)

I like to be myself when Im home when sometimes its not as easy in college etc but Im finding it harder and harder to be comfortable at home. example, if a soppy bit comes on the telly(movie etc) they all sigh and curse the screen, and when I stand up for it saying that theres nothing wrong with it, I get the "are you gay" look. Today I came home and just in conversation I was saying that I was going on the atkins diet, jesas he looked at me as if I had 20 heads, "diets are for women" (and this is coming from a practicing baristor), especially when Im trying to do things about my weight.

Its always like this, although most of the time these subject matters dont come up, but does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this? It insults me that they think this way about me, it might not seem that trivial to most but its bugging the **** out of me....

and no, coming straight out and saying "stop treating me like this" wont work.believe me.....any ideas?

any thoughts on how to tackle the situation?

thanks...

FunkyChicken

Why would you stand up for sappy bits on tv if you know how they're gonna react? Just grin and bare it or find somewhere else to live duder.

seamus

Slag them back.

"Diets are for women", reply with "That explains why you're such a fat **** then"

"Are you gay", reply with, "Yer ma doesn't think so".

Perhaps you're not used to it, but men don't go in for the "you're hurting my feelings" emotional stuff. If anything it'll make them think you actually are gay.

smiler26

... and find somewhere with people on your level! That's what I'd do anyway.

You sound like Mr Perfect by the way

Overheal

Take em to the mattresses and gives em a slagging.

Dont do the ow youre hurting my feelings bit - it only escalates things. "Man Up" so to speak.

Iv rented 4 houses and iv been in similar situations where i hated the people i lived with that i almost dreaded the taught of going home and constantly dreamed of harming them ha ha

What you have to do is look for somewhere else to stay where you will be more comfortable as these men arent going to change. Its hard having to pack things up but the place im now is like heaven, everyone just says hello and then leaves the person to it, im sharing with 2 men and they are gentlemen and the house is spotless, i love comming home. No point in paying for a place to be misserable in.

try www.daft.ie and they will show you all the available house shares in your price range, no harm in looking

watna

[quote=[Deleted User];55192018]Iv rented 4 houses and iv been in similar situations where i hated the people i lived with that i almost dreaded the taught of going home and constantly dreamed of harming them ha ha

What you have to do is look for somewhere else to stay where you will be more comfortable as these men arent going to change. Its hard having to pack things up but the place im now is like heaven, everyone just says hello and then leaves the person to it, im sharing with 2 men and they are gentlemen and the house is spotless, i love comming home. No point in paying for a place to be misserable in.[/QUOTE]

+1. Our last two room mates have caused a bit of trouble and coming home hoping the other people aren't there or hoping they'll go out is not a nice way to live.

Seriously, life it too short and crap to not have somewhere nice to go home to and get away from the world. If they keep pi*sing you off it's not worth it. Living with people is hard.

JuliusCaesar

Teddi wrote: »

(and this is coming from a practicing baristor),

Don't think barristers were ever noted for their sensitivity...... brashness, yes; ego, yes; thick-skinnedness, yes; sensitivity, NO.

You'll never convert them. They're happy in the way they think and see no reason to change.

turnsoutIwas

smiler26 wrote: »

... and find somewhere with people on your level! That's what I'd do anyway.

You sound like Mr Perfect by the way

+1

Teddi

thanks for the replies guys...

no way in hell would I take the "your hurting my feelings" route...thats just asking for trouble...

and its not that I can't take a slagging, thats fine...

its just that I pisses me off when I dont see them giving me any support with the way I am, after me thinking that they were fairly cool guys...ya know?

the diet thing meant something to me as im at a junction at my life at the moment and want to improve myself....they were saying to me why do I need to diet coz im not fat? (i see if differently though....)

i guess I was looking for false support, as thats all I got.....

but ive been with azzhole flatmates before so I usually can deal with this stuff..just on edge a bit at the moment...

stick-dan

Dude i am in the exact same situation at the moment but fortunately for me i live with another guy who is ok and i can have a laugh with. One of my housemates is a pompus idiot and definitely the dirtiest person i have ever had the displeasure of working with. I was thinking of moving out but listen i am playing him back at his own game you should do the same. Get in there first, take the rip out of them.Not worth living with a-holes though i must say.Sympathy goes out to ya as i know what its like. If you can't play them at their own game then find somewhere else to live. No point putting up with that crap. Find a nice place with nice people to live with, ideally people you are on the same intellect level as you are as these guys are still clearly primative. Good luck man.

wylo

hey OP, they aint gonna change, either move out or man up!! Also dont mind the diet! exercise exercise exercise , you'll put on more weight in the long run with special diets imo(I know thats not really your personal issue here).
Some lads are like that with films and situations, others arent and are just as "ladsy" if not more than the guys your describing. Youd prob like to live with me and my mate, we both sat down and watched brokeback mountain recently and admitted we liked it haha. Some lads would find that crazy others wouldnt give a ****

Teddi

heheheheh....thanks for that laugh out moment wylo mate..

really, I needed that, I can imagine the two of you..holding cushions up close to your face to hide the crying

I mentioned to the lads one time when they pulled a freaker on me for saying that "so what if its about gay men...the acting in it is brilliant!"

That made them feel uneasy being around me that day...how ****ing stupid is that?....I'm more open minded than they are and i dont have any phobia's to which they clearly do!

Stick-dan!...thanks buddy, just reading your thread you sound like a sound guy, someone id get along with well :P

Its just so hard to find nice, cool guys to hang out with these days, either egotistical or as insensitive as an effin door knob....take your choice! :P

appreciating all the advice here guys...thanks