Child Minding - Worried Sick

bohsboy

Recently moved to a new area and found a childminder who had come highly recommended from various local people so for the last 4 months, our 20 month old son has happily stayed three or maybe four days a week from 9am to 3pm.

I normally pick my son up and on Monday I got an awful shock. Picked up my son earlier than normal, about one o clock when the childminders husband pulled in to the rear of the house in a van. I was putting my son in the back of the car and said hi to the husband. I've only seen him once or twice and he seemed nice enough, a bit shy but very kind to our son and the two other children who are also minded in the house. But, this time he almost fell out of the van, slurring his speech and falling around the place. He was completely hammered and the smell of drink was unreal.

He slurred something to me and continued unsteadily into the house. I was disgusted with him driving and in that state but the thought of my child being in the house while he was like that terrified me. My wife and I discussed it at length and she seems to think it may have been a one off as she would know the family and he has no history of drinking problems.

Am I overreacting? I'm not the confrontational type and would hate to ask the minder what was going on, but at the end of the day, where my son's safety may be at risk.......?

I took the day off work yesterday and minded him myself and reluctantly allowed him to go today. I've just picked him and all seems grand and the minder said nothing about monday.

What do you think....?

cathy01

hard one, maybe say something like, I seen your hubbie , was he out celabrating something.....
this should open up some type of dialog....you can then gage if it was a one off or a regular occurance..

Lizzykins

I'd keep an eye on it myself. If the woman has come well recommended she must be good. It might have been a one off but if it was a regular thing then that's a no-no. I'd be more worried about the drink driving. What if he and the wife decided to bring the child out somewhere? Presumably he works?

I minded kids myself many moons ago and had an issue where child's mother threw a wobbly because she saw cigarettes in my house. Not mine-I've never smoked! Had to reassure her over and over. Having said that drink is a much more serious issue.

TequilaMockingBird

If you had placed your child in a Creche it would not be acceptable to have a drunken man in the building.

Your child is in a private home though, so I guess other people live there and can do as they please as such.

I would go with the previous poster, and try to open up the conversation as to why it happened. I'm sure the childminder would understand your very justified concerns.

embee

I'd monitor the situation very carefully, tbh. Whilst the woman minding your child might be highly recommended, you have no control over what risks her husband will take, whether at home, work or on the road. I personally wouldn't feel comfortable if I felt my daughter was in your sons shoes - all it takes is one stupid mistake to put your child at risk. Even one drink will impair someone to an extent, their reaction times slower etc. If your child was about to pull a pot of boiling water down on himself, someone whose had one or two drinks isn't going to get to him just as quick as someone who is fully compus mentis.

I don't agree that anyone should expect any less of a private childminder than they would of a creche. It might be their home, and yes, they can have who they want in their own homes, but they should step in and say "You're drunk, stay away from the children". A private childminder worth their salt will not be exposing your child to any risks. If one of my childminders teenage children got drunk and caused an accident where my daughter was injured, I would never turn around and say to myself "Oh well, I chose to put her with a childminder, its her house, what did I expect?" Parents put their trust in a private childminder just as much as they would into a creche, and should never expect anything less than the best care for their child in their absence.