Rude Awakenings

jezza

Well I tell ya, I got the fright of my life yesterday morning.

I didn't get to sleep til late, was half jarred getting into bed. But have this giant big teddy dog- like its life size. Its black and white.

Now I am a bad sleeper. I won't sleep the full night, not unless i'm blacked out from a night on the tiles... So I kinda sleepily woke up some part of the morning. Through a half open eye, I see a black blur on my pillow beside me.
Sleepily think its the boyfriend. Sleepily throw my arm over that side and sleepily give it a hug.
But it was all squishy. Dear Jesus I nearly had a stroke, and practically leapt out of the bed.

Turns out it wasn't the boyfriend, twas the dog.

Share your own stories here!

Dizzyblonde

I woke one night and looked at my hubby beside me, lying on his back with his eyes open and not moving. Turned out he'd just woken before me, but in that fraction of a second I was convinced he was dead!!

Donegal Lass

I lived in Galway for a stint, but came home to Donegal for the weekend! Went out on the sat night and had a little *way* too much to drink and fell asleep with my face squished up against the wall (my bed at home was pushed up against one wall at the time)...

so anyways, I wake up on sunday morning feeling like ive been hit by a bus and my nose is touching the wall... and suddenly Im like "WHERE THE F**K AM I???" nearly started crying, too scared to move in case i didnt like what i'd see behind me and I knew they weren't my curtains.. never s**t myself more in my life...

Realisation slowly kicked in..

I had forgotten that I was in Donegal, safe in my own bed.... I was so used to waking up looking out a window in Galway that I completely crapped myself and didnt know where I was!

I felt soooo stupid!! :rolleyes:

Weidii

When I was in school my mam used to open my room and my sisters room in the morning and the cats would come in and wake us up.

Cathmandooo

Sunday morning I thought I was awake, in my dream I knew I was lying in my bed, felt something under me and at first thought it was someone elses arm but then realised I was lying on my arm weird and it was dead, so was content, then I hear someone whisper 'Dee' in my ear. Well by jaysus I jumped out of bed snappy, got the fright out of my life, I was sure I was awake but must have still been dreaming!

tk123

The other week I was having problems with my wrist like carpel tunnel so it was going numb etc when I was asleep. Anyhoos I woke up and felt a stone cold hand/arm lying across my tummy - it wasn't until i was sitting bolt upright freaked out that I copped it was my own arm :rolleyes:

Nevyn

Getting woken by your child whining at the side of you bed saying they are sick and as you open your eyes you get your face vomited on.

SarahSassy

One night I was particularily *ehem* puggled.. Went to bed and brought a glass of water with me for that emergency drunken middle of the night mouth drought... Got thirsty in the middle of the night so reached out for my water. Down the hatch but it was not water - I had picked up the lavender oil burner and thrown the contents (water and lavender drops) down my throat. I nearly lost my life..... If felt like I had swallowed sunflower oil (well I suppose it would..) I had serious tummy burn and was burping lavender for days - no joke....

Even now, if people mention flowers in food I feel like heaving....

WildWood

I remember waking up one morning in the bed completely starkers (it was a really cold night & I had DEFINITELY gone to bed with my PJ's on!) Got out of bed wondering where the hell my pj's were.........after much searching i found them folded in the wardrobe with all my work clothes. Very odd:o

I was staying in a friends house one night. The bed was mounted on a raised platform. For effect.
So early the next morning I hear my friend pottering around. I freak out convinced I'm at home and being burgled. I leap up out of the bed and tumble off the platform, with a sickening crunch.

dewsbury

no alcohol involved in this one.

About 25 years ago there was a minor earthquake in Dublin (really!).

I was lying in bed at the time and felt the 'quake. I thought that the cat had jumped off the bed and went back to sleep!

(This earthquake story is real by the way. Shortly after there were t-shirts on sale with the slogan "I survived the Dublin earthquake").

Dizzyblonde

dewsbury wrote: »

no alcohol involved in this one.

About 25 years ago there was a minor earthquake in Dublin (really!).

I was lying in bed at the time and felt the 'quake. I thought that the cat had jumped off the bed and went back to sleep!

(This earthquake story is real by the way. Shortly after there were t-shirts on sale with the slogan "I survived the Dublin earthquake").

I remember that, though I didn't feel the quake myself.

Quality

When I saw rude awakenings I thought you were going to mention the 4 o'clock in the morning horn...

My husband has a habit of waking in the middle of the night for a quick ride and back to sleep...


now that is what I call rude!!

Lauragoesmad

When I lived in Liverpool with my boyfriend the 2 of us kept on having dreams that there were spiders in our bed. I actually on one occasion (according to himself) tried to find the thing, looking under the pillows and lifting the sheet. This went on for 4 months and the day we were finally moving out we moved the bed and we found the biggest nastiest looking spider lurking. To this day whenever I talk about it, My boyfriend goes mad and says "WE WERE DREAMING! I CAN'T THINK THAT SPIDER WAS ON US WHILE WE WERE ASLEEP!!
We never did find out if we were mad or the spider shared our bed for 4 months!!

Lauragoesmad

Quality wrote: »

When I saw rude awakenings I thought you were going to mention the 4 o'clock in the morning horn...

My husband has a habit of waking in the middle of the night for a quick ride and back to sleep...


now that is what I call rude!!

The aul "unwanted surprize sex"

Rattlehead_ie

Quality wrote: »

When I saw rude awakenings I thought you were going to mention the 4 o'clock in the morning horn...

Great Minds think a like! I remember waking up one night randomly just as the picture above my bed fell off the wall, scared the **** out of me as I roared and punched it

Reku

Think the worst I've had is simply falling asleep early in the evening, waking up later that evening, looking at the watch and then thinking I'm late for work and having a mad rush to get ready until I realise "oh poop, it's still the evening"*. Then heading back to bed and feeling rather stupid.:o



*usually far less polite language involved to be honest.:o

Jules

This thread has given me such a laugh!

My oh has a habit of snoring and breathing fairly heavy, just remember one night listening to him snoring and i couldnt sleep and thinking would ya ever shut up and stop snoring, when all of a sudden he stopped and for about 30 seconds there was not a sound out of him, then thinking **** he was dead, when then he jumped up and gasped for breath, i crapped myself, jumped up and thought **** he is dying.. i nearly lot my life, after he settled down he tells me he suffers from a touch of apnoea, basically he stops breathing in his sleep.

Now everytime he stops breathing i freak out, but he is ok after a few seconds!

thedizzler

Last summer, a friend and I were staying in this huge hostel in Denmark for a night. We'd read loads about it being the most amazing hostel ever, but when we got there they were full and had mixed up our booking, so we were now in an 8 person mixed dorm. Fine, you'd think, we're made of pretty stern stuff, until this 40 year old man comes in and strips down to his Y fronts(yes.Yfronts.) and proceeds to lie on his bed staring at us. I mean really staring, which is actually quite disturbing, even when you're doing normal stuff like brushing your hair or reading a book. Took ages to fall asleep as I could see him staring over. Then in the middle of the night I woke to a shadow standing over me. I lept up and started screaming like a woman possessed.
I woke the entrie room. Yeah, the "shadow" had ,in fact, been a towel hanging off the the end of the bed.

ashisback

my bf woke me up one night hit me in the face i though i was dreamin but he had to wake me up becuase my nose was bleeding and he was trin to wake me up

rain on

Was up in Dublin visiting the boyfriend there a few weeks ago, missed my last bus home on the Sunday and couldn't stay with him due to family situations (his ma worked from home and was fine with me staying on weekends but didn't want me there on Monday mornings), so I stayed with a male friend of mine who bears a bit of a resemblance around the face to the boyfriend (though different height, build, hair, etc). Woke up the next morning going 'where the hell am I?', looked over to the next bed, saw my friend's face and thought 'ah deadly, i'm at the boyfriend's house' and then after a few seconds realised 'good grief no, it's not him'.

Nothing happened like but it was such a weird feeling to have this sudden rush of affection and sexual desire for someone who turned out to be my mate. (And to make things worse we went out with each other for about a year when we were younger and had a terrible sex life.)

Was so glad that we weren't sleeping closer together because I probably would have thrown the arm over or thrown the head in before I realised who it was. Ugh.

Crumble Froo

Jules wrote: »

This thread has given me such a laugh!

My oh has a habit of snoring and breathing fairly heavy, just remember one night listening to him snoring and i couldnt sleep and thinking would ya ever shut up and stop snoring, when all of a sudden he stopped and for about 30 seconds there was not a sound out of him, then thinking **** he was dead, when then he jumped up and gasped for breath, i crapped myself, jumped up and thought **** he is dying.. i nearly lot my life, after he settled down he tells me he suffers from a touch of apnoea, basically he stops breathing in his sleep.

Now everytime he stops breathing i freak out, but he is ok after a few seconds!

that has a name?!

i have that! it runs in my family, my dad, his brothers, my nana...
so at this stage, it would really take a while for someone to start worrying... though it did freak my dad out when i was a new babba in the cot, and stopped breathing...

eyeball kid

I'd nearly see a doctor about the apnoea Crumble Froo. Its not supposed to be good for you. Its puts pressue on the heart apparently.

whatsgoinon

i sleep with my eyes half open, so that people think i am still awake and carry on conversations with me, until they get no response and realise i am in actual fact out for the count. exboyf thought i was awake and tried to 'surprise' me.

Kiya

Lauragoesmad wrote: »

When I lived in Liverpool with my boyfriend the 2 of us kept on having dreams that there were spiders in our bed. I actually on one occasion (according to himself) tried to find the thing, looking under the pillows and lifting the sheet. This went on for 4 months and the day we were finally moving out we moved the bed and we found the biggest nastiest looking spider lurking. To this day whenever I talk about it, My boyfriend goes mad and says "WE WERE DREAMING! I CAN'T THINK THAT SPIDER WAS ON US WHILE WE WERE ASLEEP!!
We never did find out if we were mad or the spider shared our bed for 4 months!!

oh MY GOD.
that happend to me the other night.

but im generally paranoid about spiders & always check the bed before i get in & move the pillows about to make sure theyre not lurking.
(when i was little, i was yawning and a spider fell off my ceiling into my mouth. i slept in a sleeping bag for a year afterwards... yeuuuucccch)

But the other night i got into bed, did the usual check while my boyf was laughing at me from the doorway. :rolleyes:

i lay down and turn my head on the pillow towards the boyf to tell him to get lost, our luvly nightly routine

and there was the BIGGEST fckn HAIRIEST spider you have ever seen in ur life, sitting on my fckn pillow, all casual looking at me...
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk :eek:

the neighbours musta thought i was being murdered, the screams outa me!!

i lept out of bed, the boyf almost wetting himself laughing at me.
and wot does the spider do?
starts legging it accross the bed towards me....

oh my god. if my boyf hadnt been there to capture it it would have chased me into the loo...
it used to be that spiders were scared of people.. whats going on?

Jay P

I shouted at someone in a dream once. It turns out I did the same in real life and woke myself and my brother up. That was majorly weird.

mitzy666

Kiya wrote: »

oh MY GOD.
that happend to me the other night.

but im generally paranoid about spiders & always check the bed before i get in & move the pillows about to make sure theyre not lurking.
(when i was little, i was yawning and a spider fell off my ceiling into my mouth. i slept in a sleeping bag for a year afterwards... yeuuuucccch)

But the other night i got into bed, did the usual check while my boyf was laughing at me from the doorway. :rolleyes:

i lay down and turn my head on the pillow towards the boyf to tell him to get lost, our luvly nightly routine

and there was the BIGGEST fckn HAIRIEST spider you have ever seen in ur life, sitting on my fckn pillow, all casual looking at me...
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk :eek:

the neighbours musta thought i was being murdered, the screams outa me!!

i lept out of bed, the boyf almost wetting himself laughing at me.
and wot does the spider do?
starts legging it accross the bed towards me....

oh my god. if my boyf hadnt been there to capture it it would have chased me into the loo...
it used to be that spiders were scared of people.. whats going on?

lmao - u actually made me cry with the laughter ! hilarious

King of Kings

i thought the baby had was falling out of the bed and tried to grab him. unfortunately for my ex he wasn't even in out bed and I punched her in the back with gusto before i was fully awake.

the kid wee'd on me twice while i was asleep and had the the cheek to say i wet the bed.

Lil' Smiler

Hmm.. i once woke up with my face feeling wet from the pillow, I was like eurgh I drooled or then thought my bf drooled... realised he was all wet too... he'd had a nose bleed in his sleep all over my pillow and it' gotten all over me


Up until about 2 years ago I used to occasionally still fall out of bed in my sleep, that wasn't fun

Crumble Froo

eyeball kid wrote: »

I'd nearly see a doctor about the apnoea Crumble Froo. Its not supposed to be good for you. Its puts pressue on the heart apparently.

meh, im not too bothered, really, like i said, runs in the family, and it's more like just forgetting to breathe than not being able to. i'd imagine my years of trying to swim underwater for as long as possilbe without coming up for a breath did infinitely more damage than this ever will.

jezza

My very lovely but very drunk big brother brought up after eights to me one night, gave them to me but i was pretty much asleep.
Woke up the next morning, came down the stairs and my mother nearly had a stroke.
It was everywhere, face, hair, jammies... bed was destroyed.
Looked like i had **** myself.

redfacedbear

My missus - not long before we got together - woke suddenly in the middle of the night to hear somebody moving about in the bathroom of her ground floor bedsit. She leapt out of bed, grabbed a carving knife from the kitchenette and as the person emerged from the bathroom she ran at them screaming.

The 'burgler' was actually her flatmate! The missus gave her such a fright.

She was unable to explain why she thought a burgler might flush the toilet before leaving the bathroom

How Strange

I went to a party one night, had quite a few drinks then got a taxi home. The next morning I woke up to see a naked man lying in bed beside me. I could only see his back so had no idea who it was as I was certain I got a taxi home alone but here was a naked man. For a few seconds I panicked and though f*ck, did I do the dirt on my bf last night? I really though I'd f*cked up for about 10 seconds and then realised it was the bf.

En route home the bf had text me to tell me he was really drunk and couldn't get a taxi. We weren't living together at the time so I'd told him to get a taxi back to my place and phone when he was outside. I kept the phone beside my bed and fell asleep. He'd come back to my house and woken up one of my flatmates by ringing the door bell.

That was the scariest 10 seconds I can remember in a long time and I was so delighted to see it was the bf.

Midna

i sometimes get night terrors, i wake up in the night paralyzed and a sensation that there is someone else in the room, or one one occasion, pinning me down and it makes my perception to time and lights and noise all screwy when I get it.

anyways, the first time I got it, I was sharing a house with 2 guys and a girl in college and I didn't know what was happening. I felt like someone was holding me down in bed and i shouted, but it didnt sound like noise came out. so when it passed I heard noise out side so I thought whoever attacked me was still in the house, I lept out of bed, grabbed a sword, ya know the japanese decorative ones and ran out of the room, wearing nothing but a very sheer ad very short tee.

turns out Id woken the housemates with my shout and the lads were downstairs checking that it wasnt one of us girls being attacked. they were a little surprised when i burst out of my room like a madwoman waving a sword and giving them an eyefull.

being the great friends that they were, they did tell everyone the next day too

Redpunto

I find it so creepy when the kids come into you but they're still asleep. You open your eyes and find a body standing next to you. It takes a couple of seconds to realise whats going on. Its like this movie I saw, i think it had reobret de niro in it as a mad scientist who put his dead sons genes into a couples IVF child. If you'e seen it youll know what im talking about.

Susannahmia

Midna wrote: »

i sometimes get night terrors, i wake up in the night paralyzed and a sensation that there is someone else in the room, or one one occasion, pinning me down and it makes my perception to time and lights and noise all screwy when I get it.

anyways, the first time I got it, I was sharing a house with 2 guys and a girl in college and I didn't know what was happening. I felt like someone was holding me down in bed and i shouted, but it didnt sound like noise came out. so when it passed I heard noise out side so I thought whoever attacked me was still in the house, I lept out of bed, grabbed a sword, ya know the japanese decorative ones and ran out of the room, wearing nothing but a very sheer ad very short tee.

turns out Id woken the housemates with my shout and the lads were downstairs checking that it wasnt one of us girls being attacked. they were a little surprised when i burst out of my room like a madwoman waving a sword and giving them an eyefull.

being the great friends that they were, they did tell everyone the next day too

I get them too. It feels like I'm pinned down for hours on the bed with my eyes glued shut and there are loads of people in the room whispering. Very scary.

echosound

Woke up in the middle of the night when I was still living at home, and reached up to turn on the light that was on the wall over my bed , to check the clock to see what time it was.

Out of the total darkness, omeone hit me a right flake over the face, so naturally enough I lost my life and tried to jump out of the bed, yelling and ranting, and got tangled in the sheets and crashed facefirst into the floor, still in the pitch black. eventually managed to crawl over to the main light switch and turn it on, looking for the intruder, and discovered there was none, my arm had gone dead in my sleep and I'd hit myself in the face with said deadarm when trying to turn on the overhead light. :mad: Bloody nose and black eye to explain to shocked parents the next morning.

My DH is a very active "dreamer" and I've often gotten kicked out of the bed, or thumped in the back while asleep, as he thrashes about a lot. He's also woken me up giggling hysterically in his sleep, at this stage I don't even notice it anymore. He's the type if he hears a noise in his sleep, he's out of bed and across the room with an ornamental sword in his hand, ready to injure burglars, before he actually wakes up and wonders what in hell he's doing starkers on the stairs holding a sword (fnar).

chuci

i was on strong medications once for blood poisoning in b=my leg had taken one or two glasses of wine before i went to bed had a very real dream that my OH was indeed a chinese man was totally convinced. when i woke up and saw my actual OH in bed beside me i freaked out wondering who the hell was this guy next to me. those ten seconds were in fact the scariest ten seconds of my life.

i always seem to fall asleep on my hand too and i hit myself in the face when i wake up from the sensation that has caused me a few heart attacks in the past.

Firesuite

echosound wrote: »

Woke up in the middle of the night when I was still living at home, and reached up to turn on the light that was on the wall over my bed , to check the clock to see what time it was.

Out of the total darkness, omeone hit me a right flake over the face, so naturally enough I lost my life and tried to jump out of the bed, yelling and ranting, and got tangled in the sheets and crashed facefirst into the floor, still in the pitch black. eventually managed to crawl over to the main light switch and turn it on, looking for the intruder, and discovered there was none, my arm had gone dead in my sleep and I'd hit myself in the face with said deadarm when trying to turn on the overhead light. :mad: Bloody nose and black eye to explain to shocked parents the next morning.

I'm sorry, but that's absolutely hilarious! Sorry to laugh at your pain, but that could be right out of a comedy sketch..

Hellm0

1. I was once awoken by a very loud and distraught pigeon which had found its way inside my bedroom window. After letting out a blood curdling roar the pigeon promptly flew away.
2. Same situation as above except was a very calm crow(might have been a magpie) staring at me. Cue me freaking out, shouting and the bird vacates my window sill.
3. Woke up once on an air matress in Munich with my friends pouring chocolate syrup on me and leaving condoms beside me in an effort to make me believe I had been raped.
4. Woken up by paramedics on a bin outside a nightclub in Munich.
5. Woken up by some strange elderly man and his poodle on a train at 8am.
6. Many times woken by bus drivers at the ongar bus station.
7. Woken by bums throwing glass bottles at train tracks(they did this every five minutes followed by alot of shouting).
8. Woke up on the couch of my apartment in Chicago at 4am wondering where the hell I was. Took me a good 5 min to realize "wait this is my place".

Carol_1985

When we were younger, if anyone ever came to stay, myself and my sister used to have to share a bed. I've had her wet the bed while i was in it and also throw up on me!! the same sister also sleeps with her eyes half open and used to sleepwalk. Another time i woke up and she was standing over my bed staring at me! She was such a strange child!

Loopy

I was on a cruise ship a few years back and after sipping a whole load of cocktails one afternoon, I went for a nap, anyway, I woke up dying for a wee and went in the little loo in my room.

Instead of heading back into the bedroom I went out the other door which left me outside my room in the main corridoor with only a teenchy g-sting on..

I will never ever forget the embarrasment of it. Everyone dressed up to the nines heading out to dinner and me standing there. Im going red now thinking about it:o

tbh

I went to Prague in 1990. Slept in the train station, and was woken up at about 3am to see a guy crouched at my feet, holding a big knife, crying his eyes out. What do you do like? I just froze, and someone said something to him. he walked off, looking at me the whole time, crying. Still no clue what that was about.

sunnyjim

One time in Rome, I woke up in the middle of Via... Gioro? Somewhere busy. I had been on the Spanish Steps pub crawl the night before. HAd to get a taxi to a metro station, and work my way back from there

Worst part - the night before I had woken up in an apartment block. I was 6 stories up, topless, sleeping on a doormat!! What the ****! I didn't even pull