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Who would win...

  • 18-02-2008 4:24pm
    #1
    helimachoptor
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators Posts: 21,693 Mod ✭✭✭✭


    Ok during a bought of insomnia last night i came up with these fights...


    God & Jesus Vs Zeus & Hercules

    Bear Grylls vs Ray Mears

    Russia Vs The "Navy Seal" from Future weapons

    Knight rider car Vs A team van

    Geroge Bush Sr & Jr Vs Bill and Hillary and Obama as guest referee


    A-Team Vs McGyver

    Xena Vs She-ra

    Hercules Vs He-man

    I had others but i have forgotten them through the day.. Please give reasons aswell they should be funny!


Comments

  • #2
    Dragan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,497 ✭✭✭✭Dragan


    helimachoptor wrote: »
    God & Jesus Vs Zeus & Hercules

    Fight DQ'ed due to no contestants showing up. Reason? Evolution.
    helimachoptor wrote: »
    Bear Grylls vs Ray Mears

    Mears can catch a fish and build a boat out of a long.

    Grylls will cut your heart out, eat small defenceless animals and generally do what stupid **** he feels like until you die somewhere in a jungle/dessert/snow then find your body and ride it home like a cheap whore.
    helimachoptor wrote: »
    Knight rider car Vs A team van

    Eh, unless there is someone in the Van all it can do is sit there. Kit wins by a hefty margin me thinks.


  • #3
    Dennis the Stone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,358 ✭✭✭Dennis the Stone


    Run DMC versus Jason Nevins?


  • #4
    Thephantomsmask
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,369 ✭✭✭Thephantomsmask


    Dragan wrote:
    Eh, unless there is someone in the Van all it can do is sit there. Kit wins by a hefty margin me thinks.

    They'd probably rig the van with servo motors in advance though to remotely control it, along with making dangerous missiles out of empty coke cans.


  • #5
    humanji
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,976 ✭✭✭✭humanji


    helimachoptor wrote: »
    God & Jesus Vs Zeus & Hercules

    Depends if it's New testament God or Old Testament God.

    Also, although Jesus is too much of a pacifist wimp to win any fight, every time Hercules or Zeus killed him, he'd come back to life, (albeit several days later), so the fight would last long past anyone caring.
    helimachoptor wrote: »
    Bear Grylls vs Ray Mears

    Ray Mears can survive on his own. Bear Grylls can survive on his own as long as his film crew are there and he's near a B&B. Plus, I've a sneaking suspicion that although Grylls acts tough, he's actually a big girls blouse!
    helimachoptor wrote: »
    A-Team Vs McGyver

    Neither will kill another person so it'll be a stalemate. But they will make lots of stuff before they give up.


  • #6
    Archeron
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,414 ✭✭✭Archeron


    How about a Tyrannosaurus Rex on a nuclear powered pogo stick against Mr Spock in a helicopter gunship?


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  • #7
    GLaDOS
    Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 23,238 Mod ✭✭✭✭GLaDOS


    Archeron wrote: »
    How about a Tyrannosaurus Rex on a nuclear powered pogo stick
    Why would a pogo stick need any sort of power?

    Cake, and grief counseling, will be available at the conclusion of the test



  • #8
    Agamemnon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,367 ✭✭✭Agamemnon


    Heather Graham Vs Denise Richards

    To be decided by mud wrestling and they have to kiss and make up afterwards.

    I don't care who wins as long as I can watch.


  • #9
    orestes
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,972 ✭✭✭orestes


    agamemnon wrote: »
    Heather Graham Vs Denise Richards

    To be decided by mud wrestling and they have to kiss and make up afterwards.

    I don't care who wins as long as I can watch.

    Fine, you watch, I'll referee! :D


  • #10
    Pherekydes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,201 ✭✭✭✭Pherekydes


    helimachoptor wrote: »

    Bear Grylls vs Ray Mears

    Ray Mears, the "Survival" expert. :rolleyes:

    More like a fat pig. Grylls would only have to run around for 10 minutes and Mears would collapse in a heap. Once he avoided being sat on, Grylls would win.


  • #11
    Sarky
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,967 ✭✭✭✭Sarky


    The correct answer to all of these is "Batman".


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  • #12
    Mossin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,219 ✭✭✭Mossin


    Sarky wrote: »
    The correct answer to all of these is "Batman".

    No, the correct answer is Chuck Norris!!


  • #13
    MooseJam
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,111 ✭✭✭MooseJam


    Bear Grylls ftw, the man drinks his own piss how could he lose


  • #14
    A-Trak
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,315 ✭✭✭A-Trak


    MooseJam wrote: »
    Bear Grylls ftw, the man drinks his own piss how could he lose

    Wait,

    So drinking your own piss makes you an unstoppable fighting machine?
    No one can stop me now, assemble the jars.


  • #15
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    God & Jesus Vs Zeus & Hercules

    Hercules. By himself. Kevin Sorbo FTW.

    Knight rider car Vs A team van

    Seeing as how the van would be pretty useless without someone driving.. Kitt.

    A-Team Vs McGyver

    One would fire hundreds of bullets, without hitting anything, and the other would make a plane out of a chewing gum wrapper and a disposable nappy. McGyver.


  • #16
    Compton
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,157 ✭✭✭Compton


    chuck norris v the world.... chuck norris........


  • #17
    RoyalMarine
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,824 ✭✭✭RoyalMarine


    chuck norris vs an attack helicoptor

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BrOwcZPwDO8&feature=related

    and chuck norris vs a car

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f67LgpJBPPE&feature=related


  • #18
    Compton
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,157 ✭✭✭Compton


    There once was a saying who came first the chicken or the egg,



    now its been solved











    it was Chuck Norris the egg then the chicken


  • #19
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 5,869 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    humanji wrote: »
    Ray Mears can go camping on his own.

    FYP.
    Slow coach wrote: »
    Ray Mears, the "Survival" expert. :rolleyes:

    More like a fat pig. Grylls would only have to run around for 10 minutes and Mears would collapse in a heap. Once he avoided being sat on, Grylls would win.

    Amen, although I'm not a big fan of BG myself, he still does some fairly crazy stuff. Mears is just a fat bloke on a camping trip. How anybody could call sleeping in a hammock under a tarpaulin with a load of pots & pans 'surviving' is beyond me.

    Grylls is ex-SAS ffs.


  • #20
    Mint Sauce
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,293 ✭✭✭✭Mint Sauce


    dustin v sockey?


  • #21
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 8,016 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Lucy Lui vs Jenna Jameson

    O yes!


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  • #22
    Doctor DooM
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 25,872 Mod ✭✭✭✭Doctor DooM


    Kitt Vs Optimus Prime, so?


  • #23
    Doctor DooM
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 25,872 Mod ✭✭✭✭Doctor DooM


    Sarky wrote: »
    The correct answer to all of these is "Batman".

    Ha ha. Comic book forums then?

    He'd find a way!


  • #24
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    Chuck Norris vs B!ue Lagoon



    ...B!ue wins.
    zomg. :eek:


  • #25
    Ruu_Old
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    Daddy VS Chips


  • #26
    ROCKMAN
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,247 ✭✭✭ROCKMAN


    MARY HARNEY V MISTER BLOBBY















    Oh way , she only standing in front of a mirror




    ...


  • #27
    boardinwork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 407 ✭✭boardinwork


    Jack Bauer


  • #28
    helimachoptor
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators Posts: 21,693 Mod ✭✭✭✭helimachoptor


    KaG1888 wrote: »
    Lucy Lui vs Jenna Jameson

    O yes!

    Thanks, I've ruined a brand new pair of boxers :eek::D


  • #29
    Redrocket
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,219 ✭✭✭Redrocket


    www.googlefight.com


  • #30
    Tabnabs
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 15,788 Mod ✭✭✭✭Tabnabs


    Romanian gypsy woman vs Irish Traveller woman? :eek:


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  • #31
    Mweelrea
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,172 ✭✭✭Mweelrea


    ROCKMAN wrote: »
    MARY HARNEY V MISTER BLOBBY

    That would be the funniest thing to watch lol:D


  • #32
    walrusgumble
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,062 ✭✭✭walrusgumble


    roy keane v vinny jones

    eric cantona v patrick veira

    roy keane v paul ince

    eamon dunphy v jack charlton

    mohamed al fayad v duke of edinburgh

    bosco v elmo

    hitler v churchill

    jordan v victoria adams

    rev ian paisley v pope jp II

    let the fight begin!


  • #33
    Compton
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,157 ✭✭✭Compton


    The-Rigger wrote: »
    Chuck Norris vs B!ue Lagoon



    ...B!ue wins.
    zomg. :eek:
    oh no you didnt :mad:


  • #34
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    shblob wrote: »
    oh no you didnt :mad:

    You're right, I didn't.

    B!ue did! :eek:


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