Daughter not eating

Carrigart Exile

My 6 year old daughter is driving us to distraction. She has always had a healthy appetite now suddenly over the past few months she doesn't want to eat, food is 'boring' 'for losers', etc. I appreciate she has some wobbly teeth (which thankfully have now come out) but it remains a battle every single meal time. Anyone else go through this 'phase' (I hope).

noby

We are going through it to a lesser extent with a 3yo. The first thing I would suggest is writing down everything she eats, you might be surprised. Cutting out snacks is the obvious thing, of course.
We also planned a menu for the week. We all sat down at the weekend and spoke about the food we like to eat, then we planned a dinner for every day (with the children's input) using that food. So far it has worked out well, and everyone is aware of what's for dinner the next day.

Nevyn

Childrens paletes change as they grow, so maybe time to introduce her to some new foods ?
Can she be part of the cooking process ? or at least be on the weekends ?

Ayla

Noby, that's some great ideas. Kids definitely show more interest in things when they get to help decide and prepare them.

OP, baring Noby's suggestions, I have another (and it may not be as popular or seem as proactive, but it works for us). As we all know, kids sometimes act out or differently to get attention, testing the bounds if you will. So my suggestion would be that if nothing else works, you do nothing. You and the rest of the family sit down as normal, put her food in front of her and be completely nonchalant if she announces she doesn't want it. Shrug your shoulders, say "oh well" and make sure she understands clearly that this is what's offered and there won't be anything else.

Some people would see that as cruel (ah! the poor child will starve!) but I guarantee you that if she's just doing this for attention it won't last long. She's 6 and old enough to understand.

My husband and I have a 14 mo old dd with an extremely active appetite, and we take that as evidence that our feeding/teaching technniques have worked for us. If she suddenly shakes her head that she doesn't want something that normally she eats all the time, we shrug our shoulders and start eating it ourselves. It's no time at all before her mouth's open again

noby

I saw Ayla's suggestion on some tv program before. Firstly completly rid the house of snacks. Set out the dinner as per normal. Allow ample time for everyone to eat their dinner, then clear the dishes away, whether it has been eaten or not. It's a tough love method, but thankfully we're not at that situation. Yet.

Trinity

My niece went through the same thing, a lot of girls seem to. What type of programmes is she watching on TV? Even the likes of Bratz and every other programme on these days seems to deal with weight and obesity etc. I know there was a thread some time ago regarding that programme. Its unreal how obsessed we have all become with eating or not eating..

Do any of female members of the family fuss about their own weight in front of her?

I know in my sisters case she was always going on about being fat (not a pick on her) constantly and I wondered if this had anything to do with her daughter barely eating and beginning to talk about calories. She is quite proud of being 'skinny'

She did take her to the doctor and he said whatever she WILL eat just give her that rather than turning meal times into a battle. For example she lived on egg and toast for a while, then it was potaotoes and beans, then it was literally just yoghurts.

If you make a huge issue out of it it will only backfire, she will use it against you as ammo. By all means explain to her how important it is that we get nourishment to be healthy and run around and play. Not enough people eat for pleasure anymore!!

angeldelight

What I have seen working with younger cousins' etc is what someone else suggested. Put out dinner, make sure the child at least sits at the table, eat your own dinner (if you have any other children praise them for eating), leave the dinner there for another little while, explain max. once or twice that there won't be any food later (and stick to it - she won't starve if she hasn't eaten one evening and she'll eat breakfast!), then just clear it and put it in the bin. When I've seen it working it's been totally without fuss, parents don't raise their voices or plead with child etc., it's just matter of fact. Oh and loads of praise if she does eat it.

Does she like stickers? Have you tried a sticker chart?

Carrigart Exile

Thanks for the ideas folks, hopefully this is only a temporary situation.

Kildrought

have recently written on this very subject in my blog which may be of help.

Musha

We have do the same thing with my 4 year old, Sits down at the table every night sometimes he eat other times he won't No problem just clear the plate away after everybody else has finished and he is yet to starve

I am teaching my two boys to cook,aged 9 & 4 every weekend either sat or sun we have "masterchef" 3 courses home cooked food from scratch.
we plan the menu, go shopping and then cook it.
the kids love it, teaches them how to cook and they enjoy the end product
last week the menu

grilled tomatoes on pastry base with parma cheese and salad
Rack of Lamb with bread and herb crust, tomato farci and baby potatoes
Puff pastry filled with carmilised pears with lime and honey and fresh cream

Bang and the food was gone

Carrigart Exile

Musha wrote: »

We have do the same thing with my 4 year old, Sits down at the table every night sometimes he eat other times he won't No problem just clear the plate away after everybody else has finished and he is yet to starve

I am teaching my two boys to cook,aged 9 & 4 every weekend either sat or sun we have "masterchef" 3 courses home cooked food from scratch.
we plan the menu, go shopping and then cook it.
the kids love it, teaches them how to cook and they enjoy the end product
last week the menu

grilled tomatoes on pastry base with parma cheese and salad
Rack of Lamb with bread and herb crust, tomato farci and baby potatoes
Puff pastry filled with carmilised pears with lime and honey and fresh cream

Bang and the food was gone

Can I come to your house for dinner Yummy

Needless to say without any prompting daughter put away a dinner last night that would have shamed a 22 stone prop forward:)

di11on

Parents are naturally concerned that their kids get enough to eat. Sometimes children can realise this is a great way to become the centre of attention.

A helpful thing I read once is that we as parents see what they are eating one meal at a time... However, it's not so important what a child eats even over a day - so long as a child eats enough over a three day period, if they are getting all they need over this period, they're grand. We tend to see things in daily cycles but a child may eat a little one day and more the next and that's ok. The idea from a previous poster of writing down what she eats is a very good one.

The important thing is for meal times not to be a battle and/or a circus performance. I remember someone saying, why would a child be an easy eater when being "difficult" results in planes and trains and a proper circus performance by the parents!!!

Musha

Carrigart Exile wrote: »

Can I come to your house for dinner Yummy

Needless to say without any prompting daughter put away a dinner last night that would have shamed a 22 stone prop forward:)

Italian with weekend

Chinese New Year for next weekend
Have not planned the menu yet but I'm sure that it will be adventurs as they both Love Italian and chinese food:)