Need ladies opinions please

KingKenny7

I just need an opinion... Basically I was away for NYE with my friends, my g/f didnt come as she was with her child. Everything was great when I left, even on the first day there the texts were loving.
NYE she wasnt herself, something was up, I was worried about her and I stayed in the hotel room alone trying to text her and ring her. She didnt answer her calls when I rang at 12.30, but I did send er happy new year texts. I got a flurry of texts all at once, and the last one said "So you can right a text tahts good to know" Since I got home she wont talk to me and just wants to be left alone for a awhile, all this is over a few texts she didnt get.

I dont know what to do, I did nothing wrong, and I love her loads, We're in our late 20's this is not a childish thing, but she is behaving chilishly.

If I could get your opinion that would be cool.

Is this her way of breaking up? I gave her the option twice by asking her if she feels she wants to then just text me and let me go. Should I dump her over he childiness? My head is melted, I just love the silly cow

thanks

Hagar

You went away for the New Year with your friends leaving your GF and child at home.
She was supposed to be satisfied with a few texts on New Year's Eve.

Can you spot anything wrong with the above?

Think quickly, the wimmin are coming and they will tear you limb from limb on behalf of your GF.
I will hold their coats while they do so.

KingKenny7

Hagar wrote: »

You went away for the New Year with your friends leaving your GF and child at home.
She was supposed to be satisfied with a few texts on New Year's Eve.

Can you spot anything wrong with the above?

Think quickly, the wimmin are coming and they will tear you limb from limb on behalf of your GF.
I will hold their coats while they do so.

Sorry about that.
Child aint mine, and I told her I;d stay in dublin if she wanted, she said no point coz she'll be in her nannies and I wont see her. We dont live togther.

SarahSassy

Yeah she definitely got the hump over the couple of days. Is there a valid reason you went away? If it was booked before you met her then she should have no issue.

It either that or else she feel bad being stuck at home with her kid and took it out on you.

KingKenny7

SarahSassy wrote: »

Yeah she definitely got the hump over the couple of days. Is there a valid reason you went away? If it was booked before you met her then she should have no issue.

It either that or else she feel bad being stuck at home with her kid and took it out on you.

We go away every year, and she knew about it when we got togther and she was even asked to go, but I knew she wouldnt on account of her child. Unlike some of my friends g/f she is a great mother.

Hagar

KingKenny7 wrote: »

Sorry about that.
Child aint mine, and I told her I;d stay in dublin if she wanted, she said no point coz she'll be in her nannies and I wont see her. We dont live togther.

Sorry if I was a bit harsh, your original post didn't have those details and painted a different picture.

Christmas and New Year affects some people badly, it's not a happy time for everyone. It can often be a time filled with negative emotions. Be nice to her, show her a bit of support, don't just forgive her apparent anger, totally forget it. Make today a better day for her. Good luck.

SarahSassy

Ok Ill guess that deep down she was not ok with you going (wrong on her part if she said she was) and I think she felt neglected when she didnt hear from you. Or else maybe she thought she would be ok and then someone commented on you leaving on NYE and it started her thinking.

I dont think its fully rational behaviour but then we are not always rational. I would treat her with a bit of TLC - she might be feeling a bit low and not too happy with her life circumstance i.e. maybe she is resenting the kid a small bit for her losing her freedom.

Maybe next year you can stay with her and go away every second year from now on.

Dont ask her again if sha wants to dump you. Its immature and if she does she will. As well as that you are putting ideas in ehr head and she might start adding 2 + 2 and getting 40 - she could assume you didnt text her cos you want to break up and you are giving her the hint by asking her...

Quality

KingKenny7 wrote: »

INYE she wasnt herself, something was up, I was worried about her and I stayed in the hotel room alone trying to text her and ring her. She didnt answer her calls when I rang at 12.30, but I did send er happy new year texts. I got a flurry of texts all at once, and the last one said "So you can right a text tahts good to know" Since I got home she wont talk to me and just wants to be left alone for a awhile, all this is over a few texts she didnt get.

I would say the main problem was the lack of communication on the night in question, (Although this was not your fault).
As you know on NYE the networks get blocked and text are always delayed for a couple of hours.. Thats why you would have got a flurry of texts as well. she probably didnt get your text messages til late.

I'd play the whole " I had a crap night worrying about you" card.
I would play down the whole night in question, Say you were in bed early and tell her how much you love her, what a wonderful mother she is and that you want to organise a night out....Just the two of you.

She still loves you.

KingKenny7

All of the above are great points and much along the same lines and I was thinking. I know she was in bed early that night and must have been cr@p for her. And I also did have a very bad night, sitting in a hotel room while your mates are having fun and your worrying about your g/f aint too good.
I would have gladly stayed in a chatted to her on the phone but she didnt answer and my stomach was twisted my head was spinning, it was like I was feeling what she was.

Sorry about the wandering off there, fact of the matter at te minute is.......
She wont talk to me and on wedsenday evening I got a text saying I just want to be left alone for a few days. I;d love to run over there with flowers chocs and a big bag of cuddles, but I just cant. All my mates say dump her, in alll honesty my mates dont have great records when it comes to this, thou they are all in very long term relationships, so they must be doing something right. I'm at my wits ends and I;m lost

Quality

KingKenny7 wrote: »

I;d love to run over there with flowers chocs and a big bag of cuddles,

I'd say that is just what she needs, She'll be in a strop with you for a couple of minutes but use your charm..

Dont forget the whole, I missed you so much, I had a crap night without you, I am never going away with out you again(you dont have to mean this) and of course I love you.

I hope it works out for you.

SarahSassy

Oh do NOT stay away from her now. Over with the flowers and try to organise someone to mind the kid so you have a bit of time alone. Spend as much time planning a night with her and time with her as you did for NYE (not a criticism by the way).

Would it be the case that she couldnt afford to go away for NYE and was a bit resentful.

She does still love you but seems to have the blues a bit at the moment and she herself probably knows she is playing up a bit.

Tom Dunne

KingKenny7 wrote: »

My head is melted, I just love the silly cow

Oh, you are one smooth operator.

In any situation like this, communication is king. Texts are the worst possible communication medium when dealing in matters of the heart. Too much potential for something to get lost in translation.

Here's a crazy idea - talk to her. Like they did on the old days, you know, face to face.

Do keep us informed as to your progress.

KingKenny7

Talk to her is the best solution all around. But she wont talk to me.

Sassy said I should go see her. But if she wants to be left alone will it not push her away further? After she text me to say leave her for a bit, I tried ringing her, but she text back saying "just leave me alone for a bit"

I want this sorted out, this is stupid. I love her so much, and all I want to do is cuddle her and treat her like a princess

SarahSassy

I would go and see her. She is throwing her rattle out of her pram. She doesnt know how lucky she is... Show her all the posts about the men treating women badly on these forums and she will soon cop on.

How about organising a weekend away next year for her and the kid....

Tom Dunne

KingKenny7 wrote: »

I love her so much, and all I want to do is cuddle her and treat her like a princess

And you wonder why I locked your thread in BGRH?

Lamb to the slaughter...

KingKenny7

I'lll go see her later today, in the hope that she sees sense.

Thank sassy

SarahSassy

Well if she doesnt there is something else up. She is not a child but is acting like one right now..

Good luck.

Let us know how you get on.

Rozabeez

Do it teh fook!

pow wow

I dunno...I get the feeling there might be something else at work on her side.

Maple

i'm sorry but is this for real?? she's acting like a total spoilt child. i'm a woman myself and i'd be ashamed of myself i acted like this. its ridiculous.

its now saturday and nye was MONDAY and its still not sorted. what sort of manipulative bullsh1te is this?? if she has a problem, tell him straight. he's not a mind reader.

he was in contact with her on the first day away and she was grand. everyone knows texts nye are just crazy, he did try to call her and she didnt answer.

if she wasn't ok with him going away, she should have said so. she was asked along and didn't go, so tough. yeah she has a kid but well thats what happens when you have one, you don't get to go to everything you would like to. suck it up and deal with it.

i'm sorry but tbh it sounds like there is something else going on in the background and she is being a cowardly b1tch by trying to make you feel bad over nothing. her behavior is totally selfish.

ignore her texts and go see her, get it straightened once and for all. you deserve better than this.

honestly this makes me laugh, if it was a man treating a woman like this and not responding to her texts and telling her he wanted to be alone because he didn't get her nye texts; we'd all be up in arms calling him a emotionally retarded ba$tard and that she'd be well rid of him. instead here we are telling him to buy her flowers and choccies.

KingKenny7

I didnt go to her..................

I got drunk all day in the pub, just like mosr of the comments on here by women, I feel like sh!t. I'm in bits, yes to the lads I;m not a real man I dont care

Crumble Froo

dude... you got anything left to lose by talking to her?

KingKenny7

I sent her a text this morning, saying thisis stupid and that if this is her way of breaking up with me then she is to text me straight away if not get over to me and we can sort whatever is up out.

So far no reply, not looking good

SarahSassy

Why the hell did you text her??? Its a half hearted lazy effort IMHO and I would not respond to it. Get up off your arse, have a shower and get over there....

You are making things worse. She is acting like a plonker but I guess given yesterdays behaviour there is more to this than NYE.

KingKenny7

I guess there is more to this then jst NYE and she should tell me. I wish I cold just pop over, but she doesnt like it when I drop over coz of the child.

SarahSassy

Well I would just do it if I were that pushed.. You made a mess of it yesterday and your TEXT didnt help.

HAPPYGIRL

Op your girlfriend is totally overreacting. She said she wants space then let her have it! I actually think your text was a good idea if she isn't willing to respond and sort it out now then let her sulk.

KingKenny7

Just got a reply there........

She said it not just over NYE and she thinks that things with us are moving too fast and she hates leaving her child. She is not ready to give herself to someone else

I'm gutted and heart broken

SarahSassy

Kenny

I am sorry to hear that. Feel bad for being a big harsh with you. Its her loss and she is a wimp to do it by text.

Deleted her number.

Best wishes,

Sarah

KingKenny7

She's gone from my phone, I debedo'd her, took her off and blocked her on MSN. She said she didnt want to do it by text but I prefer it that way, which I do. its sad, we were only saying since our time togther things were the best we both ever had. It took me 4 years to give my heart to someone else, guess its goin to be another 4 years

SarahSassy

God that is sad and my heart goes out to you.....

Maple

sorry to hear that kenny but you're well rid. seriously immature woman there. she's made you feel bad all week and question yourself, you don't need that.

KingKenny7

Last point on it, she texted me 30 mins later saying "very childish dont ya think" Think this was coz I debebo'd her. I have not replied.

Maple

KingKenny7 wrote: »

Last point on it, she texted me 30 mins later saying "very childish dont ya think" Think this was coz I debebo'd her. I have not replied.

:eek:talk about the pot calling the kettle black. seriously kk7 you're better off without her. it might hurt now but you deserve someone who will talk to you, not use this pathetic cold war method of dealing with problems.