on the rebound??

locombia

What does this exactly mean? I broke up from a long term relationship (4 years) last August. I was pretty cut up up about it but it was a mutual decision so there was no major drama or deep wounds to heal, on either side. I didn't think that I would be able to look at another man for some time but just after christmas I met a really nice Polish guy. I have met up with him twice already and I really enjoy spending time with him and the fact that he is totally gorgeous kinda helps too....Now my friends are saying that I am on the rebound from my last boyfriend but I don't think so..I don't know to be honest. i do enjoy spending time with this new guy and we have a lot in common. He is completly different to my ex and I would really love to keep on seeing him again. But are my friends right. Is he just someone I think I need to replace my ex?? Advice greatly appreciated:)

How Strange

OP, relax and stop analysing it. You enjoy this guys company and you like him so what's the problem.

It may or may not be a rebound but rebounds are usually intense relationships in which the main objective is to replace the ex as quick as possible with a new man so everything happens quickly - you meet, move in blah blah blah.

As long as you take your time and let the relationship develop (if it develops at all - it may just fizzle out) then its less and less likely that it will be a rebound.

If however you move in together next week or next month then it could very well be a rebound.

For the moment just enjoy the fact that you've met a guy you are interested in and attracted to. It's not that easy to do you know.

JuliusCaesar

locombia wrote: »

I broke up from a long term relationship (4 years) last August. ....... but just after christmas I met a really nice Polish guy.

A rebound is a bounce. 4 months is a LOOOOOONNNG bounce!

zzantara

Option 1;
Go lock yourself up in the Garden shed and feel miserable until this rebound period is over(I'm sure that your friends will tell you when that is).
When you are well enough you can hang around noisy pubs and night clubs hoping to meet a nice guy
Always regret not finding out about you and this Guy ??
Option 2;
Have great fun exploring your relationship with your New Friend and the different culture that he comes from.
Enjoy the Ride(no pun intended-but hey you never know!!)
Make your so called friends VERY jealous as they see your relationship blossom ?
Know that you gave things a good go!

I think that you should keep "WEEING"? him !
Sincere Best Wishes !

Colonel_McCoy

In the same situation as you, broke up in August after 6 yrs on off. Met somebody over xmas who seems to be really nice. I must admit when we broke up I was going out crazy looking for a replacement and after a while I came to conclusion that I needed my own space and stopped looking.
Then over xmas I met this person.....................All i can sau you will only realise when you are ready and over things. Dont listen to anybody but urself

daiixi

Who cares if your friends are right? Go out with and spend time with anyone you want As long as you're safe and happy and not hurting anyone do whatever you like!

the_syco

If you went for someone 3 years after the breakup, they'd probably still say you're on the rebound. Heck, they'll probably say it until you date several guys. Screw them. You like the lad, chill, and be happy. They're probably speaking "from experience", and explain the few flings before their current with the old "I was on the rebound" excuse.

dr_manhattan

"rebound" is just one of those words that people use to make themselves feel like they understand how relationships work and have a special knowledge of the whole thing. Nobody does.

You seem like you like this guy for who he is.

"rebound" refers to situations where you're fully living out your issues with your ex, in a new relationship. I've been there: You really don't seem to be.

And after 4 years you deserve a break from overthinking things. Enjoy yourself.

Son_of_Belial

Don't sweat it, just do it.

estar

you are an adult. you make your own mistakes / decisions

you should know yourself how you feel. tell them this politely and thank
them for their opinion. for that is all that it is.

dont doubt yourself so easily.