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Medical slang

  • 23-12-2007 10:08pm
    #1
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 31,118 ✭✭✭✭


    Angel lust: a male corpse with an erection (not uncommon). Is also sometimes used to mean death that occurred during intercourse.
    BFH: Brat From Hell, usually accompanied by PFH, i.e., Parent(s) from Hell
    Bobbing for apples: unblocking a badly constipated patient with one's finger
    Bury the Hatchet: accidently leave a surgical instrument inside a patient.
    Code brown: Incontinence-related emergency
    DBI: Dirtbag index, which is calculated by the number of tattoos on the body multiplied by number of recentmissing teeth, to estimate days without a bath
    Donorcycle: motorbike, the biggest cause of donated organs!
    FTF: Failure to fly, for attempted suicide victims
    GPO: Good for Parts Only
    Journal Of Anecdotal Medicine: The source to quote for less than evidence-based medical facts
    N=1 trial: Polite term for experimenting on a patient
    Neuro-fecal Syndrome: S**t for brains
    Organ recital: A hypochondriac's medical history
    O-sign: Found on the very sick patient who lies with mouth open. Precedes Q-sign
    Q-sign: Following the O-sign, it's when the terminal patient's tongue hangs out of their open mouth
    Rule of five: If more than five orifices are obscured by plastic tubing then the patient's condition is critical
    TFBUNDY: Totally f*cked but unfortunately not dead yet. Best avoided in the medical notes
    TUBE: Totally unnecessary breast examination
    UBI: Unexplained beer injury, for all those hungover people on Sunday mornings with black eyes or swollen knees and no idea how they'd got them
    Whopper with cheese: Fat woman with yeast infection


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