where to go from here

LegacyUser

soz if this shud be personal issues feel free to move!

My parents caught me with a girl a few months back reaction was worse den expected-basically det find out im with a girl againn im out...
imincollege btw n finAncilly dependant...

i tried join lgbt but its soo cliqugy n im not the "typical" type... in most peoples opinions neway...not like iv a friend to go long with...

neway all my old mates think im fine n out n proud blah blah blah but im denyin it in college

n college friends not exactly homophobic but theyre very girly n i worry

n im feelin iv no real mate ne more hence drinkin to the point i dontcare...dontg tel me fone the gay switchboard cos im bi...hence fit neither community n despite being lucky with "acceptance" feel no bond to anyone n i think its this holdin me back

iv no friends no family nemore n its wearin me....im not gettin with ne1 cos im scared its d wrongh choice...i kiss guys im not attracted ot in clubs to get attention n meanwhile think im in lobe with a friend (straight)...i dont no wher togo from here!

Boston

Firstly, could you type correctly. Its extremely difficult to read your post.

You need to drop the "I'm bi and therefore done fit into either world" line. To a degree its true but a lot of the issues you will face are the same a lesbian girl will face. All societies are cliquey, LGBT ones included.

With regards to your parents, its a fairly difficult situation Are going out a spending money getting wasted in clubs, which in turn makes you depended on your parents for money in the first places, thus causing the original problem? Re-evaluate your situation and your reaction to it.

College wise, hmm, unless theres a reason to be telling people I personally wouldn't. They won't get 'it' in general.

lucyburn

fcukedup bi grl wrote: »

soz if this shud be personal issues feel free to move!

My parents caught me with a girl a few months back reaction was worse den expected-basically det find out im with a girl againn im out...
imincollege btw n finAncilly dependant...

i tried join lgbt but its soo cliqugy n im not the "typical" type... in most peoples opinions neway...not like iv a friend to go long with...

neway all my old mates think im fine n out n proud blah blah blah but im denyin it in college

n college friends not exactly homophobic but theyre very girly n i worry

n im feelin iv no real mate ne more hence drinkin to the point i dontcare...dontg tel me fone the gay switchboard cos im bi...hence fit neither community n despite being lucky with "acceptance" feel no bond to anyone n i think its this holdin me back

iv no friends no family nemore n its wearin me....im not gettin with ne1 cos im scared its d wrongh choice...i kiss guys im not attracted ot in clubs to get attention n meanwhile think im in lobe with a friend (straight)...i dont no wher togo from here!

Could you type this post out again please, this time in English, i can't make any sense out of it.

Boston

Theres no need to hassle the girl. She's already been informed.

LegacyUser

fcukedup bi grl wrote: »

so if this should be personal issues feel free to move!

My parents caught me with a girl a few months back, reaction was worse than expected-basically they found out i was and said if im with a girl again im out...
im in college (clearly not studying english) by the way and financially dependant...

i tried joining lebian gay bisexual t? but its soo clicky and im not the "typical" type... in most peoples opinions anyway...not like i have a friend to go along with...

anyway all my old mates think im fine and out and proud blah blah blah but im denyin it in college

in college my friends are not exactly homophobic but they're very girly anda i worry

and im feelind iv no real mate and more hence drinking to the point i dont care...dont tell me to phone the gay switchboard cos im a bi sexual ...hence i fit in neither community despite being lucky with "acceptance" feel no bond to anyone and i think its this thats holding me back

i.ve no friends and no family anymore and its wearin me....im not getting with anyone because im scared its the wrong choice...i kiss guys im not attracted to in clubs to get attention and meanwhile think im in love with a friend (straight)...i dont no where to go from here!

End of translation

kraggy

First and foremost, don't think that the Gay switchboard is just for 100% gay people (even though no such person exists as far as I'm concerned). They will talk to anyone who may be confused in any way about anything.

But you obviously have a mindset against pursuing that avenue, so I would suggest maybe going to a gay bar on your own and try meeting some people there. Or try and ask one of your existing friends to go along with you for support but if you are afraid to ask one of them, then try going on your own. You'd be surprised how easy it is to get talking to people.

And i think you need to take 2 steps immediately. Firstly, stop the whole going out to get drunk cycle as it will only lead to misery and end up affecting other aspects of your life, not just your personal life. You'll fall behind in college and your overall happiness will be affected. What you need right now is a clear head.

Second step is, stop going out and snoggin guys you're not interested in. Waste of time trying to conform to something you feel you are not. And it's not fair on the guys either.

Finally, your words "im not getting with anyone because im scared its the wrong choice" need considering. Why exactly do you think "it's the wrong choice"? Wrong in your parents eyes perhaps?

You need to follow the path that pleases you and not your parents. However, in order to prevent further suffering for you, try not let them find out about any other exploits while you sort your head out at least.

Good luck in the future and all it holds.

K.

Chiaki

hey, dont feel so bad. im bi and sometimes everywhere seems either lesbian or straight and the whole world is confusing and closed minded as hell! im in college too and financially independant and not either "butch" or "femme" Im out to some and not to others. so we got a fair bit in common! But you dont have to fit in with steriotypes like butch or femme (i dont go for either type). I live my life on what i want, male or female, butch or femme, etc etc.
We are expressing ourselves by being bi, lesbian, gay and straight, whats a little bit more expressing yourself going to do apart from make us happier?

These guys dont make you happy, so just leave them alone. Dont be scared to be with who you want, worst thing that can happen is it doesnt work out! Besides if you feel this bad now things can only get better!? As regards making friends, your sexuality has no bearing on that, i got straight, gay, bi friends. just put yourself out there its easy! Watch, you up for drinks some night in town?

ps lgbt is a bit too cliquey and steriotypical for me too :-)