Most Useless Job?

red_ice

I was in swords in the pavillions there over the weekend. As i was leaving the carpark there were 2 people at the gates that you put your ticket in to let you out taking the tickets off the drivers and putting them into the slots beside them.

this has to be the biggest waste of human resources i've ever come across. What type of person cant open their window and put a ticket in a slot 1 fott from your car window to open a gate? You have to hand your ticket out the window to the chap who is the same distance away from the slot as you are from him.

As we left the carpark there are a bunch of zebra crossing pathways. To which there are blinking lights and ramps where the walkways go. They had 4 guys waving on the traffic... they did nothing but wave on traffic, they didnt assist the people crossing the zebra crossing or anything!

What a waste of man power imo.

Im sure there are a bunch of other useless jobs out there, but my god that extracts the urine.

Devil5434

haha that really is a useless job

jester77

The guy that stares at you having a piss and then expects a tip for it, wtf is that all about

arybvtcw0eolkf

red_ice wrote: »

What type of person cant open their window and put a ticket in a slot 1 fott from your car window to open a gate? .

Female drivers.

More useless jobs.. Seen three cops outside the GPO (all female) standing in a group (on the corner of Henry St) and all texting on their phones!.

Useless.

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Bertie Ahern... There I said it!

Unpossible

The guy that stares at you having a piss and then expects a tip for it, wtf is that all about

I hate those guys

star-pants

Oi ... I'm a female driver (not today though ) and I can do that! Even though I'm only little and have to stretch.

Ha - bangarda passed me t'other day in her car - on the mobile! You'd think they'd have bluetooth.

Not quite useless but questionable -- Leaf blowers... it's Ireland.. .they'll just blow back later!

gerTheGreat

A really short one???

star-pants

gerTheGreat wrote: »

A really short one???

Sorry ger - is that in reference to me? If tis - I'm 5'3 - not *that* small but still - I can find it hard to reach sometimes unless I pull up close.

ericl

Lollypop people at traffic lights.

Glowing

In China, the biggest abundance of useless jobs ever!

There are people who stand at junctions and blow whistles at you when you try to cross the road if the green man isn't green! There are also people who stand at the checkouts and draw a line through your receipt as you pack your bags. There is usually a line-drawer at every till.

Unpossible

There are people who stand at junctions and blow whistles at you when you try to cross the road if the green man isn't green! There are also people who stand at the checkouts and draw a line through your receipt as you pack your bags. There is usually a line-drawer at every till.

Chinese drivers are kind of crazy and I can see how having people stopping cyclists and pedestrians from running red lights would be useful. I haven't seen those receipt guys at the till, they usually stand near the exit and stamp your receipt to make sure you haven't tried to sneak anything out. Sometimes they just waved me out without checking anything, as the wife said "why would westerners steal in the store"

Varkov

ericl wrote: »

Lollypop people at traffic lights.

I think, stop me if I'm wrong, they're there to stop kids beeing run over. Fairly useless allright. :rolleyes:

ScumLord

star-pants wrote:

Oi ... I'm a female driver (not today though )

Did you grow a penis?


There's a dude in a box on the way into the Galway airport carpark. Seeing him I assumed he gave you the ticket but no it's all automatic and he does nothing but tell you to take a ticket from the machine just behind you.

jor el

Can't believe nobody mentioned the whole FAI in the useless jobs stakes.

red_ice wrote: »

What type of person cant open their window and put a ticket in a slot 1 fott from your car window to open a gate?

You may scoff, but I've seen people, on numerous occasions, park so far from the machine that they had to get out of the car to put the ticket in. Got stuck one day when the guy in front realised he hadn't even paid the ticket and ran off to find a pay machine. Stupid people are a natural resource that is in abundant supply. Pity we can't use them for a fuel source or something.

jester77 wrote: »

The guy that stares at you having a piss and then expects a tip for it, wtf is that all about

If you give him a good tip, he'll tell all the girls you have a big willy.

star-pants wrote: »

Oi ... I'm a female driver (not today though )

Finally saved up enough for the sex-change then eh? Welcome to the better side. It's great being a man isn't it?

Degsy

The clowns at airports who stand there haranguing you about bringing liquids and stuff to the departure area."put yissir lipsticks an stuff in a plastic bag or ih'll be confisca-ed"

jor el

ScumLord wrote: »

he does nothing but tell you to take a ticket from the machine just behind you.

Obviously his job is to clear up the confusion about why he's sitting there.

marcsignal

Taoiseach....

sorry, I thought you meant useless c*nt in a job.

ibh

Glowing wrote: »

In China, the biggest abundance of useless jobs ever!

There are people who stand at junctions and blow whistles at you when you try to cross the road if the green man isn't green! There are also people who stand at the checkouts and draw a line through your receipt as you pack your bags. There is usually a line-drawer at every till.

Apparently in China they have been employing people to polish the leaves on trees in Beijing for the upcoming Olympics!!!

ericl

Varkov wrote: »

I think, stop me if I'm wrong, they're there to stop kids beeing run over. Fairly useless allright. :rolleyes:

Thats what the traffic lights are for.:rolleyes:

One Cold Hand

Quite often at the Toll Plazas on the M50 there's a person standing in the 'Exact Change' lane, and all they do is take your money and throw it into the (already massive) basket for you. Obviously they don't have to give you change as it's 'Exact Change.'
Completely pointless.....

star-pants

ScumLord wrote: »

Did you grow a penis?

jor el wrote: »

Finally saved up enough for the sex-change then eh? Welcome to the better side. It's great being a man isn't it?

I like guys - get on well with them - but... don't want to be one
I was referring to the introduction of the penal law of the prov licenses (I've a first prov) - hence no driving today... :rolleyes:

Stephen

I've seen those guys with the whistles in China at busy intersections
Chinese drivers really are insane - its every man for himself there. If there's a gap in the traffic everyone will try to dive into it, no matter what they're driving. The scariest thing I saw on the roads there was the hordes of people on electric (i.e. silent) mopeds... They don't turn on their lights at night in order to get a bit more range out of the things and they sail through red lights like they're not there :eek:

The only possible explanation I can think of for the guys in the exact change lane of the M50 (I've seen them a lot too) is left hand drive cars. There's quite a lot of them on our roads, and I can't see how a lone driver in one could possibly reach the basket without getting out.

marcsignal

ibh wrote: »

Apparently in China they have been employing people to polish the leaves on trees in Beijing for the upcoming Olympics!!!

WTF ?? If thats true, it's the outwright winner

ScumLord

One Cold Hand wrote: »

Quite often at the Toll Plazas on the M50 there's a person standing in the 'Exact Change' lane, and all they do is take your money and throw it into the (already massive) basket for you. Obviously they don't have to give you change as it's 'Exact Change.'
Completely pointless.....

I wouldn't so much mind that, there's nothing more embarrassing than throwing the money and having it go everywhere but the basket. Bastard ended up costing twice as much because I wouldn't go crawling under the car looking for the €2.

Cheeky_gal

red_ice wrote: »

I was in swords in the pavillions there over the weekend.

OMG I WAS IN THE PAVILLION TOO ON THE W/E!!!!! :eek:

arybvtcw0eolkf

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

OMG I WAS IN THE PAVILLION TOO ON THE W/E!!!!! :eek:

So was I!.. Was that you shouting "Maaaaaaaaaaaairt, you've a lovely bum"..

Degsy

Mairt wrote: »

So was I!.. Was that you shouting "Maaaaaaaaaaaairt, you've a lovely bum"..

No,she was shouting "get your hands off me or i'll have the law on ya!"

Ninja_scrotum

Trolley boys that live in the sheds outside dunnes... Pointless.

One Cold Hand

ScumLord wrote: »

I wouldn't so much mind that, there's nothing more embarrassing than throwing the money and having it go everywhere but the basket. Bastard ended up costing twice as much because I wouldn't go crawling under the car looking for the €2.

Well I don't know how bad your aim is, but those buckets are about the size of Jordan's minge. You couldn't miss it if you tried.

Sad Professor

Dylan_James wrote: »

So my point is, (leaving aside father-son subplots) security guards that aren't really there for anyones protection.

He should have called the guards but security employed by shops and the like aren't really paid for this sort of thing.

I was once almost assaulted by a customer/scumbag where I work and when I later complained to the manager that there was no security around at the time he told me that security is there to "protect the assets of the store" and not me. :rolleyes:

Dylan_James

Sad Professor wrote: »

I was once almost assaulted by a customer/scumbag where I work and when I later complained to the manager that there was no security around at the time he told me that security is there to "protect the assets of the store" and not me. :rolleyes:

What an excrement manager. Has this store manager not realized that he has invested in you as an employee, time, money and experience? Surely you would be one of the greatest assets to the store?

Sad Professor

Dylan_James wrote: »

What an excrement manager. Has this store manager not realized that he has invested in you as an employee, time, money and experience? Surely you would be one of the greatest assets to the store?

Nah, I'm just a number to them.

Anyway for most useless job ever I nominate that women who works in Superquinn who sits at the door all day saying hello to people. I mean WTF??

Wertz

Anyone at or above middle-management in the HSE. The proof is in the pudding.

As for the gate keepers in the Pavillions, I have a feeling those guys are also there to take money off people, you know the ones who are too stupid to pay for the ticket whilst still inside the shop like you're supposed to and who end up causing queues of irate motorists while they helplessly put the ticket into the scanner over and over and look for a coin/note slot.


[edit] Reason for the person on the M1 toll booth exact change lane is to stop anyone who isn't the car rate, duking the extra toll money. I only know this becuase my ex-boss is one of the people it was set up to protect NTR's profit margins from...

Cheeky_gal

Mairt wrote: »

So was I!.. Was that you shouting "Maaaaaaaaaaaairt, you've a lovely bum"..

LOL it most certainly wasn't!

Degsy wrote: »

No,she was shouting "get your hands off me or i'll have the law on ya!"

Actually, was shouting "Get off YORE MA!" Ha, I've always wanted to say that...

Keith186

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dylan_James View Post
What an excrement manager. Has this store manager not realized that he has invested in you as an employee, time, money and experience? Surely you would be one of the greatest assets to the store?
Nah, I'm just a number to them.


Have you got one of them useless jobs then??

I'd like to nominate NTL Customer Service staff, they are useless, stupid and never sorted any of my problems with the pheckers.

Sad Professor

Keith186 wrote: »

Have you got one of them useless jobs then??

Just because I work for a pile of w**kers doesn't mean my job is useless. Crap certainly but not useless.

Tbh the truly useless jobs can be found higher up the ladder. I mean just because someone has an office and wears a suit doesn't mean their job is really necessary to anyone but themselves. *cough* HR *cough*

congo_90

Varkov wrote: »

I think, stop me if I'm wrong, they're there to stop kids beeing run over. Fairly useless allright. :rolleyes:

Would a driver not stop for the big red light behind the lollipop man?

masseyno9

Most likely they would, yes. But would a kid always stop at a red man on the other side of the road? They should, and are no doubt told over and over again, but they always need someone to remind them. and what about lollipop people where there are no pedestrian lights? plenty of places like that around too.

-avey-

jor el wrote: »

You may scoff, but I've seen people, on numerous occasions, park so far from the machine that they had to get out of the car to put the ticket in. Got stuck one day when the guy in front realised he hadn't even paid the ticket and ran off to find a pay machine.

Im one of those people, i never manage to pull up close enough to the machine to reach it..a constant source of amusement to my friends in the car with me :eek: but then im not the tallest either

it really bugs me to pull up behind someone who hasnt paid their ticket and hold everyone up by having to run back and pay it..:rolleyes:

also i got stuck at a toll bridge before, i was the 3rd or 4th car, but there was some problem with the machine and there was a build up of cars behind me, of course more cars kept pulling up behind, not realising, and i was stuck as i was too far up the queue to reverse..must have been there for nearly half an hr :mad: seems that the "useless" attendant who wasnt there might have come in handy after all...

Jesus Wept

ericl wrote: »

Lollypop people at traffic lights.

En route to school on my first day, hearing about this lollipop lady, I thought the lollipop lady would be giving me a lollipop.

She didn't.

I still think it's a reasonable assumption.

HAPPYGIRL

The-Rigger wrote: »

En route to school on my first day, hearing about this lollipop lady, I thought the lollipop lady would be giving me a lollipop.

She didn't.

I still think it's a reasonable assumption.

Go on admit it, it was your first day in secondary school!

Jesus Wept

HAPPYGIRL wrote: »

Go on admit it, it was your first day in secondary school!

True, but... still seems a reasonable assumption.

One Cold Hand

One Cold Hand wrote: »

Quite often at the Toll Plazas on the M50 there's a person standing in the 'Exact Change' lane, and all they do is take your money and throw it into the (already massive) basket for you. Obviously they don't have to give you change as it's 'Exact Change.'
Completely pointless.....

How many times have you followed someone who misses......:eek:

If I wasn't fed up queuing it would be amusing watching them scurry round like demented rats looking for the coins.;)

Degsy

Being a footballer is a pretty useless job.Football is something urchins play on the street outside thier tenaments,its certainly not a job for grown men.

Black Swan

Heard that diesel engine railroad trains in the USA are required to have a fireman by union contract (firemen were used on wood and coal burning steam engines).

Varkov

congo_90 wrote: »

Would a driver not stop for the big red light behind the lollipop man?

You'd think so wouldn't you?

red_ice

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

OMG I WAS IN THE PAVILLION TOO ON THE W/E!!!!! :eek:

Mairt wrote: »

So was I!.. Was that you shouting "Maaaaaaaaaaaairt, you've a lovely bum"..

NO FREEEKIN WAI! Did you see the useless? I think everything that surrounds the carpark in one of those high vis jackets has a fair bit of useless in it.

Degsy wrote: »

Being a footballer is a pretty useless job.Football is something urchins play on the street outside thier tenaments,its certainly not a job for grown men.

It is if you want to think your very important and underpaid for kicking a sphere around a field.

GerryRyan

The Curragh race course hands out some useless jobs on the busier race days ... a guy to stand outside the toilets (which are right beside each other) and tell people which one to go into. Another guy to point the press towards the press stand (massive signs and arrows there anyway). There are a few more.

And yes, I worked there - but I had a use.

Cheeky_gal

ThatGuy wrote: »

The Curragh race course hands out some useless jobs on the busier race days ... And yes, I worked there - but I had a use.

OMG SOOOOO DID IIIIIIIII! I'm not joking, I did. It's a kip. Never again. Sorry off topic I know, apologies.

Rhiannon14

Wouldn't it be the case that for any job to be 100% useless, that it would be of use to no one. In each of the aforementioned, the jobs are useful to at least one person...the one getting paid to do them :rolleyes: