Sex problem

LegacyUser

Hi, I have abit of a problem with a while Been having sex with my girlfriend with the last 2 months Well tyring to, is more the point With the last month or so I can't seem to keep an erection when it comes to sex No problem when we're fooling around just lose it as soon as sex is close. I have had sex with her just not lately I have had sex with my last girlfriends with no problems so this is really really getting to me. It's nothing to do with not being comfortable with her I'm mad about the girl and I know she's starting to question things now as well so it's really just not nice Any comments or suggestions or anything

acorntoast

Talk to a doctor first and foremost - to try to rule out any physiological issues, and look into talking to a psychotherapist. There is a guy in Dublin who is highly qualified to deal with this stuff.

http://www.basrt.org.uk/content/show_therapists.asp?area=14

There are many things that it could be - from work stress, to diabetes, to suddenly dealing with a lot of strong feelings for someone.

Sometimes for some men, the experience of really being fully in love can be difficult and threatening. If previously say, sex was more of a hunter/prey type activity, or one that they may have internalized some guilt about - like it's not something to do to a nice girl, they may not necessarily have had to engage at an emotional intimate level to enjoy sex previously, and it might be a bit daunting or scary - along with exciting and pleasurable to be fully opened up to someone.

Talk to your girlfriend about how you're feeling - and show her that you want to do something to deal with this, and I'm sure she's a kind, loving girl and she will stay with you while you work it out.

uberwolf

all of the above is fair enough, but the order is wrong. The GF should be the first stop, it's clearly a mental thing. Whether it is to do with the new lady or work/life stuff is unclear, but if you and her are headed towards serious then this may be a great way to affirm that.

The doc is something of a second resort tbh, if the lady doesn't hang around after your chat she wasn't worth it, and if it's not resolved then bring a pro into it (not in the old rabbi joke way)


http://www.4degreez.com/jokes/Religious+Jokes/966213078/joke.html

LegacyUser

Thanks for this We have talked alright an we are staying together through this but it's just getting so frustrating for both of us at the moment I can see it in her and its not nice to see

Talliesin

Frustrated wrote: »

No problem when we're fooling around just lose it as soon as sex is close.

Since you don't need an erect penis for most types of sex, just get on with having sex and see if the arousal from that helps.