Contraception ruining first impressions

LegacyUser

Hey. Long story short, im out of a long term relationship and i've met a new girl.

My ex had the implant, and we didnt use condoms. So anytime we went to have sex, it was down to getting in the mood and going at it. My ex had a very high sex drive, and maintaining that was never a challenge as i do too.

Anyway, It got to doing stuff with my new girlfriend. We were both fired up and ready to go, and she suggested i get a condom... i had to stop to put one on, but for some reason i lost the rush of blood... I stayed just over semi and it played on my mind the whole time... the end result was me just throwing the towel in and saying sorry.

Now, by no means did my gf get offended(that i could tell anyway). She is by far the best looking girl i've been with and im crazy about her. It was all down to me. it really put me in a bad mood because i want her to enjoy the act and its somewhat playing on my mind that it might happen again.

I just wanna know is it common that it happens? I've never been unable to perform, and its playing on my mind the fact that it could happen again

Lil' Smiler

Yeah of course it is... takes a while to get used to change!!

Don't get hung up about it, at least your new gf understands!!

How Strange

Had the very same problem with my bf when we started dating. It was more miss and less hit for the first few times, he wanted me to go on the pill (I didn't want to due to past problems with the pill) but after a short while we got used to them and still use them.

I'd say leave it as long as possible before putting one on, you might only have a few minutes left. Relax about it too and when you get used to using them you'll have it out of the wrapper and on within in seconds.

Don't worry if it doesn't go well the first few times; honestly girls don't mind that sort of thing as long as we know its not a recurring problem.

strawberrybox

hey i would advise you to try putting on condoms when your on your own to get used to the feel of them and actually the practice of putting them on cos no wonder you lost your hard on a bit if you had to fumble around trying to put one on and it prolly felt really strange to you- so the more you get used to it the less it will even be an issue for you because if you start obsess over it the more likely it is to happen agian-

strawberrybox

strawberrybox wrote: »

hey i would advise you to try putting on condoms when your on your own to get used to the feel of them and actually the practice of putting them on cos no wonder you lost your hard on a bit if you had to fumble around trying to put one on and it prolly felt really strange to you- so the more you get used to it the less it will even be an issue for you because if you start obsess over it the more likely it is to happen agian-

Seconded - get used to it on your own when there's no pressure for time or someone waiting
it does happen. Once you get used to it you'll be grand, just don't worry

Cathmandooo

thirded! I cant understand why guys dont just practice on their own?! some thing similar happened my ex, i was his first and he had never attempted it before so of course he got all flustered when the moment came and embarrassingly (for him) had to tell me he doesnt know how to put it on so the moment completely died. Get practicising, you'll be fine!

John Mason

why dont you get your girlfriend to put it on you, with her mouth ?

ats

irishbird wrote: »

why dont you get your girlfriend to put it on you, with her mouth ?

care to offer a demo??

seriously though you got to anxious over wearing them again and probably frustrated, as you said it played on your mind which lead to you giving up.

as others have suggested use them when alone, get use to the feel of them again get use to putting them on and so on. Personally i have the damn things and don't bother with them, but I'm married a few years so, but when we first stared dating it was a nightmare

Auldloon

When i have had to use them i have found it helped to have it close by with the wrapper already torn. That way theres less of a break in the moment to put the damn thing on. You can prob tell i hate the smelly things.

daniel3982

Same things happened to me last few times with various girls, but then Ive been fine when its been without, I'm possitively ****ting the next time to be honest.... Thing is its alright when Im by myself, but when the girls there too it just ges semi and kaboom disaster.... Hopefully my next g/f will be on the pill and STD free!

LegacyUser

Sorry about how vague my post is. Im in my mid 20's and have used them many times before my previous gf. However, my previous GF was the first time i didnt use a condom and that went on for 3 years. When you go from using condoms to not using them, its game over in seconds because there is too much sensation. But you gradually build up stamina for it, and manage to go on for a nice period of time... however, going from no condom to using a condom is a different, more irritating ballgame. Im starting to think that its mainly the lack of sensation i get from doing the deed with a condom on. You cant feel ANYTHING! So i guess that i just go off game because im not really getting anything out of it.

Condoms are much tighter than i remember them to be, but i dont fumble putting them on... The second its out of the wrapper it would be on within 5 seconds.

She seems to be a very understanding girl and we have talked about what to do and so on, so we are looking into alternative contraception as a couple to see what we can do. Thats pretty understanding isnt it?