I have no time

LegacyUser

I feel so trapped. I have no time to myself any more. I have a life and my mother and my sister (which acts like my mother at times) is making it so difficult for me. I started driving last year and got myself a car and since then iv got more of a life. Places to go and people to see. Both my sister and my mother doesn't work. But i do and i find it difficult to fit in things i enjoy in my spare time. The reason being is that they expect me to bring them places. At times they just want me to drop things im doing and bring them places. I have been the first in the family to have a car for years and it does make things easier. I bring them shopping, to the doctor and if its a genuine emergency il drop what im doing and help them out - instead of wasting money on a hackney. But i think its getting to a point where they are just taking advantage of me. There are so many reasons. Last week my sister wanted me to drive to the shop and get crisps and ice cream - in all fairness, who needs crisps and ice cream ??? We're a 10 minute walk from the shop so its not even that far to walk.
Well anyway iv have no time to myself any more and im beginning to say no, otherwise il probably go mental trying to please others. My sister goes crazy whenever i say no and gives me abuse telling me that im just getting fatter behind the wheel - i don't know how she can say that - she's fatter than me and iv been losing weight in spite of her nasty comments.
Am i being unreasonable?

How Strange

OP, it's a tough one. Your family are taking advantage of you because you have a car. Some of it has to be expected I suppose - like bringing your mam to the doctor or bringing her shopping but tell that sister of yours to get off her ar*e and walk to the shop.

Also, try to negotiate bringing your mother shopping on your terms so for instance do it on a Friday night if you are staying in but don't leave it so you are sitting around all day Saturday waiting for them to say 'ok, lets go shopping now'.

Ultimately, you have to expect to be seen as a bit of a free taxi if you are the only one with a car but put some ground rules down and stick to them. I'd say you should head off on a Saturday to meet friends so they know you won't always be around to suit them and so they will have to work around your life to get a lift to the supermarket etc.

It's hard because its family but stand your ground and it will gradually change.

bronte

My own brother is in a similar situation.
My dad isn't always around to drive mum (who has a bad back)
I don't drive myself...so he occasionally gets asked to give lifts.
To be honest I'd only ever ask him if I was really stuck or the weather was bad or something, as I prefer a nice walk myself.
If your sis is constantly badgering you, tell her to learn to drive herself.
A lift here and there is ok...but constantly being asked is another thing.
Do you pay your own insurance/tax/petrol?
If so it is at your discretion who you give lifts to.
Most young lads wouldn't mind giving their mum a lift within reason.