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What are your funniest Irish sayings?



  • Registered Users Posts: 4,428 ✭✭✭ Sky King

    I have a bar in me pants that would bate a donkey out of a quarry.

    and I STILL can't think of any funny Irishisms. :(

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,061 ✭✭✭ benway

    Mickey H wrote: »
    F*** me pink.

    **** me blue and call me a smurf, no?

    Ah, bite the back a me ballix.

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 666 A0

    "Mods feel free to move this" :D

  • Registered Users Posts: 187 ✭✭ O-Deazy

    She has a gowl on her like a donkey's yawn..

  • Registered Users Posts: 856 ✭✭✭ firefly08

    Once said of unscrupulous money lenders: "He'd lend his arse and **** through his ribs" :)

    Really hungry: "I'd ate an apple through a letterbox"

    I reject the premise of the question: "Ask me bollix!"

    My own personal favourite: "Go n-ithe an cat thu/ is go n-ithe an diabhal an cat" (May the cat ate you, and may the divil ate the cat!)

    And yes it's ate not eat :)

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,536 AngryBollix

    Orange69 wrote: »
    Bertie Ahearn is a competent and inspiring leader.

    so's your oul one

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,933 ✭✭✭ holystungun9

    That fella has no idea what he's at, he might as well be looking into a field of thistles.

    Some head on ya for batin in back doors.

  • Registered Users Posts: 3,956 Doc Ruby

    firefly08 wrote: »
    Really hungry: "I'd ate an apple through a letterbox"
    I'd ate the back door buttered.

  • Registered Users Posts: 473 ✭✭ Halo Kitty

    I'll be with you now in a minute...

  • Registered Users Posts: 3,956 Doc Ruby

    Ara sure what wouldya go on out of that for the love of jesus mary joseph and all the angels and saints above between us and all harm, god rest his soul may the road rise up to him.

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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,192 ✭✭✭ EarlERizer

    Couple of my favs
    When i'm hungry - "I could ate the balls off a low flying crow"

    When I'm asked to assist someone with something I've no knowledge of - "I may as well be looking up a cows ar$e"

    ...and one(s) I've heard ;)

    When greeted with "Whats the craic? - either "The end with the lips that dont move as much" or the more crass "The best part of a woman" *runs for cover*

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,513 ✭✭✭ donalg1


  • Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 8,490 Mod ✭✭✭✭ Fluorescence

    sarah. wrote: »
    haha such a great thread, just read through most of it and it's just brilliant! :) I know some myself but can't for the world think of them! feck it anyway!

    Such an inspired post to bring back a thread from 2007...

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,024 ✭✭✭ previous user

    2 euro for a hostel?

  • Registered Users Posts: 140 ✭✭ Marcus_Crassus

    Another hungry one:

    "I'd eat the arse off a low flying duck"

    You'd say this about a miser or a tight bloke:

    "Here's short arms, long pockets"

  • Registered Users Posts: 863 MonkeyGuy

    Using hoof as a verb.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,653 Ghandee

    Go and ask me shoite! :confused:

  • Registered Users Posts: 11,689 ✭✭✭✭ Potential-Monke

    "I'm so hungry, I could suck cold puke through a tinkers sock!"

  • Registered Users Posts: 11,477 ✭✭✭✭ MadYaker

    You've a face like a pig licking piss off a nettle.

    May you be half an hour is heaven before the devil knows you're dead!

    Also, Hows she cuttin?

  • Registered Users Posts: 11,689 ✭✭✭✭ Potential-Monke

    Oh, and one my father uses that i haven't heard anyone else use when referring to someone: "Fuckdog".

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  • Registered Users Posts: 238 ✭✭ carolinej

    She's as flahual (flathulach) with her money.

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,422 ✭✭✭ ToddyDoody

    'i'm goin pissin', 'she got a good kick up the arse' and 'are you doing lines with anyone?'

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,594 Giruilla

    **** libh

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,677 deise go deo

    Go ndéana an diabhal toirneach do d'anam in ifreann
    May the divil make thunder of your soul in hell

    Irish is a great language to curse people in, so much more inventive than just telling someone to fo fúck themselves, though you can say that too, 'Feistigh ort'.

  • Registered Users Posts: 222 ✭✭ marozz

    " I'm in the height of it "

  • Registered Users Posts: 122 ✭✭ Ambient Occlusion

    "The curse a' fcukin' Jaysus!"
    "The curse of the holy farmer on yeh!"
    "He's as rough as a bear's arse"
    "I've got two balls but neither of them are a crystal"

  • Registered Users Posts: 5,721 ✭✭✭ Al Capwned

    "There's a wind out there that'd blow a knacker off his sister....."

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,048 winston82

    Thread should be renamed to "unfunny spud gobbler quotes that you'd never hear in Dublin"

  • Registered Users Posts: 4,422 ✭✭✭ ToddyDoody

    winston82 wrote: »
    Thread should be renamed to "unfunny spud gobbler quotes that you'd never hear in Dublin"
    with remarks like that you'd swear dublin doesnt even want to be the 33rd county :)

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  • Registered Users Posts: 13 ✭✭✭ Chuckle2

    You're some tashty budgie !