Advice really needed

LegacyUser

I've been bottling this one up for a while now but its gotten to the point where i badly need advice.

Im almost 19 years old, and i've just done the leaving cert and started university, but i'm in a situation that I really probably shouldnt be in. I've been absolutely mad about one of my ex teachers (he's in his early 30's) for over a year now, it's like nothing i've ever felt before, and it's not going away. I've known him all throughout my teenage years, and by the time i finished 6th year, we were very close. I was going through some personal problems at the time, and he was always there for me, no matter what.I told him everything, and i wouldnt have gotten through everything without him. We were always very flirtatious, and we were so comfortable around each other that maybe some things were said that weren't typically student-teacher conversation, but we both considered each other as friends on the same level. I am close to his friends, some of whom are also teachers, and while i have been in touch with them briefly recently, i have not been talking to him, and even though i thought that a lack of communication would make me get over him, he's all i ever think about still. He is in a long term relationship, and is probably happy in it, but he means the world to me, and i cant see my feelings for him changing. What should i do?

eimearnll

do nothing,talk about playing with fire.if he wanted to see you he would have contacted you by now.

Huggles

confusedgirl wrote:

I've been bottling this one up for a while now but its gotten to the point where i badly need advice.

Im almost 19 years old, and i've just done the leaving cert and started university, but i'm in a situation that I really probably shouldnt be in. I've been absolutely mad about one of my ex teachers (he's in his early 30's) for over a year now, it's like nothing i've ever felt before, and it's not going away. I've known him all throughout my teenage years, and by the time i finished 6th year, we were very close. I was going through some personal problems at the time, and he was always there for me, no matter what.I told him everything, and i wouldnt have gotten through everything without him. We were always very flirtatious, and we were so comfortable around each other that maybe some things were said that weren't typically student-teacher conversation, but we both considered each other as friends on the same level. I am close to his friends, some of whom are also teachers, and while i have been in touch with them briefly recently, i have not been talking to him, and even though i thought that a lack of communication would make me get over him, he's all i ever think about still. He is in a long term relationship, and is probably happy in it, but he means the world to me, and i cant see my feelings for him changing. What should i do?

Walk away. You could ruin his whole life if you started anything with him.

Its very possible that you misread his friendly way with you as flirting and you mightalso be seeing what you want to see.

Go to college and meet a guy more in your age group.

Spades

forget about it and move on with your life. This kind of thing nearly always end badly.

SarahSassy

Move on and in time you will meet someone of your own age. You have a crush on your ex-teacher but as he has said nothing and is involved in a long term relationship I would suggest that you were reading too much into it.

Dont waste your time in college pining for someone who wont be yours.... Enjoy!!!

Talliesin

confusedgirl wrote:

Im almost 19 years old

confusedgirl wrote:

it's like nothing i've ever felt before

You haven't had long enough in this world to have felt much like it before, have you?

There's even better feelings to come, with any luck.

Fanny Cradock

I would suggest that you get on with your new life in college. The reality is that you are 18 and he is at least 30. A relationship between you is very unlikely to work, especially if he is already in one. You wouldn't be posting here if you actually believed perusing this was a good idea.

livinginkorea

If he hasn't contacted you then he's not interested. Sorry to sound harsh but that's the truth. You should enjoy your college life now because god knows you will have to start studying and doing projects soon.

- D

Miss Fluff

It's a crush and you should thank your lucky stars nothing happened. And you will have plenty more. Try if you can to stick to people around your own age, go to college and enjoy it. Just forget about him.