Coparenting when separated

paulb77

Hi all,
I don't know if this is the right forum. I am getting separated from my wife and we're trying to work out who has kids when and how much money is fair.
WE have a 2yr nutcase boy who is wonderful and she has a 7yrs old daughter from a previous marriage who is also wonderful but a bit sad.

I am thinking 2 nights a week and every second fri sat sun, i.e. equal custody. Is this too much swopping between houses?
I have offered 500 a month for my boy as maintenance, whihc will hurt alot. I am going to drop it to 400 if we have equal custody, until he's in school, then drop it back to 200.

Anybody have an opinion or who knows a similar situation?
I am very lost, very stressed and would appreciate any help,
thanks

K-9

I'll post a reply on parenting where you have another thread.

Carrigart Exile

paulb77 wrote:

Hi all,
I don't know if this is the right forum. I am getting separated from my wife and we're trying to work out who has kids when and how much money is fair.
WE have a 2yr nutcase boy who is wonderful and she has a 7yrs old daughter from a previous marriage who is also wonderful but a bit sad.

I am thinking 2 nights a week and every second fri sat sun, i.e. equal custody. Is this too much swopping between houses?
I have offered 500 a month for my boy as maintenance, whihc will hurt alot. I am going to drop it to 400 if we have equal custody, until he's in school, then drop it back to 200.

Anybody have an opinion or who knows a similar situation?
I am very lost, very stressed and would appreciate any help,
thanks

If you have equal custody why should you be paying anything?

dj_quinn

Not true, you have to pay maintenance. I seperated from my wife in April, we have a 2 year old son. We're going the mediation route now, I'm paying €400/month and I get to see him 4 days a week. My ex had to be forced to give me that kind of access. The controlling behaviour was so extreme, it was all about her terms, I had no time on my own, my parenting skills are criticized and belittled at every opportunity. Her bullying tactics are threats everytime I see her, about money, access, etc. At least the mediator recognizes the father and the child's rights, if it was up to my ex, who is an obseesive parent as well, my son would never get to see his father.
Just a word of advise, things can be rough going with children involved, try not to get angry and don't let her walk all over you about money and access.

Beruthiel

closed as there is a thread already in the parenting forum.