Bully boss?

LegacyUser

Hi there, this may go on a bit but...
I've been in my current position for two years. Unfortunately my and manager's personalities clashed. Fair enough, we all can't get on with everybody all of the time.
However, on three different occasions, my manager has called me derogatory names (well I believe they're derogatory, we're not that pally so as a result I viewed these 'jokes' as insults). There were other people around when she did this. Also, just a few months back, she derided my choice of vote in the general election. I had a bit of satisfaction in asking her should I have put that information in my CV. I don't think she appreciated that .
I'm leaving my post at the end of the month to go on and do something I had meant to do some years back. At the moment, I feel like I'm being ignored....tolerated until I leave. I had a sick day yesterday, came in today and was never asked what had been wrong with me or how I was feeling. Now I know that might seem small, but when you're already under the impression you're being ignored, it just adds pressure.
To come to the point, what would you do? Would you see out the job, say nothing? Or would you make a complaint against what I've discribed above? Sometimes I feel foolish for even worrying about this, and other times I feel so angry and bitter (and I definitely don't want those two emotions following me into my next job).
Thanks for reading

radioactiveman

hi OP
know how you feel but the much easier route is to say nothing until the end of the month, let them at it. You could make a complaint but you have nothing to gain from it and it'd just give you more stress (unless it gets really bad). Everyone is usually out to protect their own skins in a job so you might not get much support from the others.. !
You could take a few more sick days as well - it seems bad now but in your new job you'll regret you didn't take more:D The new job will be a new start as well I'd say:)

milod

Sounds like you want to have your cake and eat it tbh. You're leaving, therefore you no longer figure as an important part of the ongoing business.

Once you announce your departure, your employer really only needs you to pass on any important outstanding business to your colleagues.

You are now no longer an integral part of the business, and by choosing to leave you have essentially implied "I'm bored here" or "I've found a much better place to work" or "I don't wish to work with my colleagues any more". So don't expect a huge outpouring of concern from people you are leaving behind!

If you need validation of some sort, seek it in your new position and in the meantime take the pragmatic view that sometimes people don't get on. Also remember that leaving and moving on to greater success is the best revenge. You boss certainly won't admit that she'll miss your contribution.

py2006

I have been in a couple of situations were I have fallen victim to "bully" bosses! I have recently left one such situation.

My immediate reaction was to walk out and complain left right and centre but as a good friend advised me its rare that you will win.

See out the notice. You have been there two years. You will want a reference.

Remain polite to this woman and ask her nicely for a WRITTEN reference and don't rely on her as a verbal one.

spurious

You're leaving anyway, so I can't really see the difficulty. As others have said, take any holidays you are due to get out earlier.

You say you were called names that 'you' think are derogatory - does this mean they are not obviously derogatory words? You say they were in a jokey manner - does this mean maybe she was trying to become more friendly with you? If they were obviously derogatory, did you make a complaint? You had witnesses - did any of them think you were being picked on?

People don't always ask how you are when you come back from being sick - some people might feel it's nosey.

People deride my political choices all the time - it's not that big a deal.

Don't whinge about your treatment in this job when you go to your new job - it looks very bad.

nbooradley

I had a similar situation with a personality clash at a place of work.

I was leaving anyway but i thought screw it and had her pulled up on an offical complaints procedure which all companies have regardless of if its the manager or not.

even if you are leaving you should have your concerns voiced to a third party only if to send the message that she cant get away with it on another employee.

worked in my case, turned a mega bitch into a meek lamb

PeakOutput

you dont like each other and you are complaining that she is leaving you alone??? strange

but either way you are leaving so stick it out leave and get over it

LegacyUser

Thanks to those of you who gave me advice on the questions I asked. I go through good days and bad days on this, I hope I can put this bullying behind me.