Wierd tantrums

september18

Hi All,
I am at wits end at the moment and I hope somebody out there will help me. Over the last 3 or os weeks when I go in to greet my son first thing in the morning he is all cheery or at least in fine form. Whenever my wife goes in any other morning he losses the head completey and calls out for Daddy. Other mornings he wakes up calling out Daddy and when I go in theres no problem but when my wife goes in , he gets all upset. We normally alternate the bedtime routine unless I'm at work so really one person usually one person isn't putting him down at night. This is really upsetting my wife especially when told in a baby voice to go away. We are both loving parents and no issue of abuse whatsoever . We seldom argue in front of him and usual arguing is wheres the remote or something similar, so he is definitly not witnessing a hostile house, but a loving one. Please help as this does not look good on me but all the same its nice to hear him calling my name . Thank u

littlebug

Hi September18,
Repeat to self "It's just a phase it's just a phase it's just a phase"

You haven't said what age your little one is? Is your wife with him during the day more than you are? There are days that I could be invisible once hubby comes home in the evening. I don't mind.. I take the time to go and sit on my bed awith a cup of tea and a book!
My 2 have both gone through "mammy" phases and "daddy" phases. My youngest, 2 1/2, until recently would not get out of bed in the morning for his daddy and would just scream til I came to get him. I have to say I was a bit sad when suddenly a few weeks ago he decided he wanted daddy all the time instead of me:( . Similarly, just after the youngest was born, my eldest, who was 2 1/2 at the time went through a major not liking mammy phase.... I couldn't comfort her at all... I shed quite a few tears at that one I was so happy when a few months ago she said, with a confused look on her face "you know, I really don't know which of you l like best".

I think they all just go through funny phases and trying and upsetting as they might be they do pass.

Just keep repeating to self "it's just a phase etc etc"

september18

Thank you for ure reply. My son is 2 and a half years old:o

Kildrought

They often go through fixations at that age, I recall my son used to grab the bars of the cot and refuse to allow anyone except me to lift him out!

We got over that one (have both of you in the room - with Dad or Mom or whoever isn't flavour of the month, standing to one side at first and then gradually get more involved with the morning routine) and he then got a notion in his head about a red tracksuit and wasn't happy if he had to wear anything else....

If it's any consolation he's now a very normal, balanced 14 yr old!

Zynks

Nothing very different to tell here either. My 2 y.o. has mammy days and daddy days, but the switches can be more frequent because I travel quite a lot and some times I get the cold treatment where he even avoids eye contact with me and I don't get the kamikazi jumps on top of me in the mornings for a few days. Other times when I arrive he only wants to do things with me, like bici (cycling) or buggy (going for a walk). Most of the time he only goes to bed if mummy takes him, but we had phases that only I could do it.

We don't take it too seriously because our eldest had exactly the same phases, so we just play along with them.

I would suggest that dad and mum stick together and don't let the little one feel he can build some "bargaining power" out of it, as in getting special favours from the one feeling left out.

Good luck!

Femelade

september18 wrote:

Hi All,
I am at wits end at the moment and I hope somebody out there will help me. Over the last 3 or os weeks when I go in to greet my son first thing in the morning he is all cheery or at least in fine form. Whenever my wife goes in any other morning he losses the head completey and calls out for Daddy. Other mornings he wakes up calling out Daddy and when I go in theres no problem but when my wife goes in , he gets all upset. We normally alternate the bedtime routine unless I'm at work so really one person usually one person isn't putting him down at night. This is really upsetting my wife especially when told in a baby voice to go away. We are both loving parents and no issue of abuse whatsoever . We seldom argue in front of him and usual arguing is wheres the remote or something similar, so he is definitly not witnessing a hostile house, but a loving one. Please help as this does not look good on me but all the same its nice to hear him calling my name . Thank u

Its called the terrible twos!:rolleyes:

And its just a phase...
I know it must be heart breaking for your wife though, but just remind her that it WILL pass...it wont go on forever. Next week it could be the other way around..and you could be the baddie..

abi2007

I'm havin the same with my two year old. There are days she cries over nothing all day. Other days she's an angel.

Oryx

My little girl calls out for mammy (and only mammy!) at night, but when I pick her up in the morning she could easily slap me for no reason other than shes cranky and wants her daddy. I wouldnt read anything at all into it other than your son is going through an odd patch. All kids do it in one way or another. (My daughter has also taken to headbutting walls in temper this week :rolleyes:) Reassure yourself that neither he nor your wife will suffer permanent damage, and Im sure he'll start wanting mammy in the mornings again soon anyway.:)

Nordie

Its just one phase of many to come. Parenthood:eek:

giddyup

Same deal for me - my nearly 3 yr old daughter doesnt let me put her to bed when Mam is around. I think it's because I'm a bit more no-nonsense when it comes to bedtime so I have become persona non grata. When Mam is out there is no problem so now we pretend on some nights that shes going out so I can put her to bed. We both think it's pretty funny.

Khannie

KtK wrote:

My little girl calls out for mammy (and only mammy!) at night

This is almost certainly high quality training on daddy's part.