Irish letter

GerryRyan

Ok, Irish is by far my worst subject, but I'm hoping for an easy letter to come up in the exam. Anyway, here's my attempt from today (2006, OL, Ceist 1 Litir).

Can anyone offer some suggestions? Grammar, structure, anything - be as critical as you want (so long as its constructive), I'm trying to improve. This is just the body of the letter. I know what addresses and dates to put in.

Cheannaigh do theaghlach siopa nua cúpla mí ó shin. Scríobh an litir a chuirfeá chuig cara leat ag cur síos ar an siopa agus an obair a dhéanann tú ann.

Cad é mar atá an saol agat?

Mar ata ‘fhios agat fein - is fada ó scríobh sibh ar a chéile,
ach den chuid is mó, táim an-gnóthach.

Táim ag iarracht mo chuid oibre a dhéanamh sa siopa nua idir ag iarracht mo Ardteist a chríochnú.

I láthair na huaire, taim gan fuinneamh, ach ag áireamh na laethanta agus seachtainí go dtí go sroichfidh mé an tríú céim (Ollscoil), nuair a bheidh an Ardteist thart.

Cheannaigh sibh an siopa bróg i Marta, bhuel go díreach roimhe – agus táim sásta a rá go bhfuil se go minic gnóthach. Tógann sé thart faoi 9 n-uaire an chloig gach lá an obair a dheanamh, ach is fiú é.

Chaith mé an t-am chúnta a thabhairt do dhuine, sin nó cuntas stoic a choinneáil.

Abair liom, an bhfuil aon post agat? Nó an bhfuil tú ag fanacht leis an Samhradh?

Ba cheart dom imeacht anois. Slán a fhágáil ag duine.

Mushy

You really just need to mention the shop and what you do there more than anything. First time you mention your parents bought a shop is in like the third last line. And you dont say what aort of work you do there(Bhí mé ag freastal na cúistimeirí). That sentence should get you through that bit. Does for me anyway.

GerryRyan

Yeah, I was just thinking that there - " ... ag cur síos ar an siopa agus an obair a dhéanann tú ann." How's my grammar anyway?

tolosenc

Aon scéal a Mhíchíl?

Mar is eol duit fhéin, is fada ó scríobhamar ar ár gcéile, ach táimse an-ghnóthach faoi láthair, leis an Ardteist agus an siopa nua atá ceannaithe ag mo thuistí. Tá mo am go léir caite eatarthu.

What are you trying to say by 'gan fuinneamh'? Tired?

Táimse an-thuirseach, fiú nach bhfuil ach cúpla seachtain fághtha idir anois agus an am ina thosnófaidh mé san Ollscoil.

Abair liom, an bhfuil post agatsa? Nó an bhfuil tú ag fanach go dtí teacht na Samhridh?

Cheannaíodh an siopa i Mí na Márta, nó díreach roimhe sin. Tá sí go han-ghnónthach, mar a fuair mé amach le deanaí! Caithim 9 uair chun an obair go léir a dhéanamh gach lá, ach is cuma liom.

What?

Caithfidh mé imeacht anois. Slán.

Le gach guí Dé,
Seán


That's what I'd have written if I were to have said the same things. Overall not bad, understandable and it seemed to flow, mostly. Watch the use of 'sibh', it's you plural NOT we. Be sure to stick to the question aswell. The work YOU do there....

ZorbaTehZ

Structure seems a bit weird tbh mate for a letter.

Syntax is somewhat unorthodox in a lot of situations, so instead of re-writing the sentences I will make an effort to tidy it up.
(Your friend is called Pádraig)

ThatGuy wrote:

Cheannaigh do theaghlach siopa nua cúpla mí ó shin. Scríobh an litir a chuirfeá chuig cara leat ag cur síos ar an siopa agus an obair a dhéanann tú ann.

Cad é mar atá an saol agat? (Aon scéal a Phádraig?)

Mar ata ‘fhios agat féin (<- dunno what you're trying to say here) - is fada ó scríobh mé thugat - faraor, táim an-gnóthach.

Táim ag iarracht mo chuid oibre a dhéanamh sa siopa nua idir ag iarracht mo Ardteist a chríochnú. (You want to say that the shop work is interrupting your studies?)Tá an obair sa siopa ag chur isteach ar mo staidéar do na scrudaithe

I láthair na huaire, tá saothar orm (out of breath), <ach ag áireamh na laethanta agus seachtainí go dtí go sroichfidh mé an tríú céim (Ollscoil), nuair a bheidh an Ardteist thart.> Crikey! Not a nice sentence Táim ag tnúth le briseadh an samhradh, agus ag tnúth le tosnú ar an ollscoil.

Abair liom, an bhfuil aon post agat? Nó an bhfuil tú ag fanacht go dtí thar eis an samhradh?

Cheannaigh muid an siopa bróg i mí Marta, (removed) – agus tá amhás orm go bhfuil an siopa gnothách. <Tógann sé thart faoi 9 n-uaire an chloig gach lá an obair a dheanamh, ach is fiú é.> Caitheann muid 9 n-uaire ag obair sa lá.

Chaith mé an t-am chúnta a thabhairt do dhuine, sin nó cuntas stoic a choinneáil. (whatwhatwhat?)

Ba cheart dom imeacht anois. <Slán a fhágáil ag duine.> Slán leat a Phádraig

GerryRyan

Thank's for all the advice. Yeah, I should really do a quick plan before writing. Taken the corrections into account and letter was re-written.

Mar ata ‘fhios agat féin = as you know yourself (in Fuinneamh schoolbook)