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Mental health?

  • 11-05-2007 10:34pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Some time ago I had my first brush with mental illness. I'm curious as to other's experiences and any feedback. It was a frightening and truly wretched experience.

    I suffered a "psychosis". I was not drinking or doing any drugs at the time, nor have I ever taken drugs.

    I was out of work at the time...I was mainly staying around the house and surfed the internet a lot until late. My computer became faulty. I suddenly found myself sleeping a lot. I thought I was just catching up on the sleep I missed while I was on the laptop surfing late.

    Then I started "remembering" things that had never happened to me at all. I slowly got more drawn into these delusions. The more I concentrated on them and told people what I was "remembering" the more pronounced they became.

    To be brief I eventually found myself getting extremely religious, buying crucifixes and attending masses frequently. I thought people were watching the house and waiting for me. I also became to believe I had being "hexed" and there was a conspiracy to get me throughout school and college. I began sending letters accusing people of abusing me as a child, another thing I had "remembered", and other ludicrous beliefs. I even went to the Gardai but thankfully did not follow through.

    I eventually got put on anti-psychotic drugs and am completely ok except for some sluggishness. Even as I write these things now and get flashbacks of the things I did I am extremely embarrassed.

    I am also frightened. Mainly due to the reason I cannot for the life of me figure out why it happened. As a kid growing up I was always hermetic and stayed around the house playing video games and eschewing social contact but I never had any insanity.

    The only thing I can point to is that I went to my doctor years ago and was quite down. He prescribed taking anti-depressants, Lustral. Over a period of time I stopped and started taking these, several times. At this point now I can remember other odd behaviours occuring when I went off them each time.

    .......


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