When Bidets go bad.

Archeron

Picture ringing into work with this excuse.
"Yeah, I just sat down on my new bidet fo a nice cooling clean up after a hearty number 2, and suddenly it burst into flames and burnt my wobbly bits off. Needless to say, I wont be in until the smell of burnt hair has subsided a bit.

http://www.breakingnews.ie/world/?jp=MHAUSNIDQLOJ

Japanese toilet makers issued a warning to electric bidet users on today, saying at least 105 units have caught fire or sent up smoke in Japan since 1984.

An extensive investigation was ordered by the government after Toto, Japan’s biggest toilet manufacturer, offered to repair 180,000 bidet toilets last month, saying several of them emitted flames in 2006-7 because of faulty wiring.

The Japan Warm Water Bidet Council, which represents nine bidet manufacturers, reported at least 105 cases of incidents involving flaming or smoking bidet toilets, the Trade Ministry said in a statement.

Bidet users ahave been urged to be careful and the council will further investigate the incidents according to the statement.

High-tech toilets fitted with warm water sprayers and dryers are a standard fixture in Japanese homes.

Toto’s problematic Z series of bidets also feature a pulsating massage spray, a built-in-the-bowl deodoriser and a lid that opens and closes automatically.

scojones

That's fairly hilarious it has to be said. Bidets do freak me out though, I couldn't use one.

Bidets. Now yore burnin'.

The Bollox

I took a shít in a bidet when I was younger. I didn't have a clue what it was, or what it was to be used for. I used my logic, and a 6 year old's logic states that if a urinal is for píssing in, this contraption must be for shítting in. only when I finished and couldn't find a flusher did I start to doubt my logic

bmaxi

Five pints of Heineken and a chicken curry can produce much the same result.

FlutterinBantam

I was at a conference in Bordeaux some time ago sharing a room with a fellow staff member whom i did not know too well.

After a very good night on the tiles and some very rich food,I felt quite some pressure on the sphinct. circa 0300.

Not wanting to wake my colleague and in darkness rested my cheeks on some nice cool pewter and unloaded fairly violently.

The backspatter on my butt cheecks immediately told me what probably had happened.Unfortunately my colleague had now woken up and wanted to use the facilities urgently!!!

All i could do was drape a towell over the offending appliance(Bidet) and say "Don't ask!!!.

She was spik and span when we came back after the morning presentation:o

The Bollox

man... talk about a shít job

*gets coat and runs*