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So I'm finally admitting it...

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Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 31 bico




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,388 ✭✭✭peckerhead


    LadyLotts, you've taken the first step (admitting the problem) — well done. Also, you have everything you need to try the AA/12-steps route — a genuine desire to stop drinking. I've been doing it for six months now, and I can assure you you don't need religion. I don't believe in a God, but I'm not (or no longer) so deluded as to believe that there is no 'higher power' outside of myself, or that I am the sole Boss of me. And that's all that's required.

    The biggest part of it — and the hardest, for most people — is getting ruthlessly honest with yourself. Everything else follows from that. Coming on here and discussing it openly is something to be proud of.

    Stick with it, and very best of luck. Take all the help you can get. And try a few AA meetings — what have you got to lose? It may not be The Only Way, but it's working fine for me and thousands of others.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,385 ✭✭✭Attol


    I really don't think I'd be able to do that though. I believe that my decisions have brought me to this and as a rational thinking being I can't blame others. I have to take responsibility not pass the blame? I just am incapable of believing in anything other than what is here in front of me right now.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,494 ✭✭✭ronbyrne2005


    AA is'nt necessary and it doesnt work anyway,anyone who claims it saved them saved themselves(www.orange-papers.org). If drinking is causing probs just give it up for a certain period say 3 months and when you've been off booze 3 months you will know you can stay off the booze. Your prob is'nt booze , the boozing is just a symptom. Maybe you will be able to drink socially in future but you have to work on the underlying probs first and don't blame the drink or personal weakness for your abuse of drink.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,807 ✭✭✭✭Orion


    Firstly congrats on your courage for admitting it.

    But I have a problem with the AA. It's not religious as others have said but it can take the form of a cult. An aunt of mine has taken it to that level. She has manic depression as well and she is not drinking anymore as far as I know. I say 'as far as I know' because not one member of her family - brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, ever her own father - has seen or heard from her in 9 months. The AA has not just helped her stop drinking it has also replaced her entire family.

    I'm not saying don't use the AA - it may well be a good option for you. Just take care to help yourself and not get too sucked in.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 463 ✭✭tunaman


    LadyLotts wrote:
    I really don't think I'd be able to do that though. I believe that my decisions have brought me to this and as a rational thinking being I can't blame others. I have to take responsibility not pass the blame? I just am incapable of believing in anything other than what is here in front of me right now.

    I know a few people who swear by AA, but like others have said these people do change, but not neccessarily for the better. Their lives are still controlled by drink, especially the fear of one drink sending them right back where they were.

    Many people also end up swapping one addiction for another, which is not healthy either. The main problem I find is that people just have no discipline.

    Interestingly enough Ireland has one of the highest rates in Europe of young people who drink no alcohol, roughly 25%. Probably due to witnessing first hand the terrible damage that alcohol addiction causes.

    The other 75% more than make up for it. ;)

    It really is up to you alone to decide if you want to be in control of your life.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 153 ✭✭darkflower


    Hagar wrote:
    I applaud you. Not for falling but for realising that you have stumbled. Stand up, brush the dirt from your knees and go on. I'll walk with you if it's any help.


    Yeah! I too am here.;) Go boy!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 141 ✭✭g-punkteffekt


    this is ridiculous. You're applauding her for admitting she binge drinks once a week or whatever? She's just your usual 21st century irish girl that can't keep up with the binge drinking culture of today. She's whingeing about a sick stomach for 2 days, awww diddums, you're getting hangovers :(. I put up with that every week, I get blackouts every week, sometimes I do stupid stuff. But I know what I'm getting into when I binge drink. I do it because I have some great times on it. And yes I drink a few the next day/night to get my head together, but I'm not an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink in nearly a week now but I'll be back on it soon, because I like drinking.
    She sounds like a drunk overly dramatic teenager to me.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,385 ✭✭✭Attol


    Fair enough if that's how you see it. I just think it becomes a problem when you've ****ed up so much that nobody wants to be around you when you're drinking because they know the state you'll be in. And since all their socialising revolves around drink you just don't get spoken to any more. In my view alcohol becomes a problem when your ability to control your drinking affects other aspects of your life and this has affected mine very negatively. I won't get into details but due to my behaviour I've lost pretty much all my friends here.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 66 ✭✭Brainy


    You have done one of the hardest bits - admitting and accepting that you have a drink problem.

    It is not going to be easy given our culture but with the help and support of friends and family you will get there. Family and friends whom you have alienated will come round once they see that you intend to make a genuine effort.

    With regard to AA, get a list of all the meetings. Then shop around until you find one that feels right - if you don't get on or feel comfortable in the meeting you will stop going.

    Good luck.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,857 ✭✭✭Duckjob


    Ladylotts, just like to add mine to the voices of support for facing up to what is a problem and making the decision to change it. Very admirable.

    Half the people in this country are still in denial about their inability to drink without bingeing.

    Best of luck.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,683 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    this is ridiculous. You're applauding her for admitting she binge drinks once a week or whatever? She's just your usual 21st century irish girl that can't keep up with the binge drinking culture of today. She's whingeing about a sick stomach for 2 days, awww diddums, you're getting hangovers :(. I put up with that every week, I get blackouts every week, sometimes I do stupid stuff. But I know what I'm getting into when I binge drink. I do it because I have some great times on it. And yes I drink a few the next day/night to get my head together, but I'm not an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink in nearly a week now but I'll be back on it soon, because I like drinking.
    She sounds like a drunk overly dramatic teenager to me.

    Seek professional help.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 141 ✭✭g-punkteffekt


    why? I'm quite fit and healthy and emotionally stable. I just like binge drinking, as do most people in this country.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,385 ✭✭✭Attol


    Drinking to the point of blackouts every week because you sometimes have fun doesn't seem healthy tbh. If you can't remember it what's the point in it? It's really dangerous as well.

    Are you always able to get home by yourself or does someone have to help you get there? Do you have random freak outs so that people have to take care of you and calm you down so you don't hurt others or yourself? Do you ever fall and hurt yourself? Have you lost things like your mobile, money or credit card? Those are all things that happen to people who drink to excess at some point or another. They are not fun for anyone concerned.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,401 ✭✭✭✭Anti


    this is ridiculous. You're applauding her for admitting she binge drinks once a week or whatever? She's just your usual 21st century irish girl that can't keep up with the binge drinking culture of today. She's whingeing about a sick stomach for 2 days, awww diddums, you're getting hangovers :(. I put up with that every week, I get blackouts every week, sometimes I do stupid stuff. But I know what I'm getting into when I binge drink. I do it because I have some great times on it. And yes I drink a few the next day/night to get my head together, but I'm not an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink in nearly a week now but I'll be back on it soon, because I like drinking.
    She sounds like a drunk overly dramatic teenager to me.


    If she sounds like a overly dramatic teenager to you, what do you think you sound like to the rest of us?

    Drinking till you blackout. No no, thats not a sign of alcoholism :rolleyes:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 141 ✭✭g-punkteffekt


    I black out when I'm knackered tired after getting drunk and I stay awake for a while. Anyway this is besides the point, I just really don't think she's an alcoholic.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,585 ✭✭✭DublinWriter


    this is ridiculous. You're applauding her for admitting she binge drinks once a week or whatever?
    We're applauding her for being brave enough to admit that she has a problem.
    I get blackouts every week, sometimes I do stupid stuff. But I know what I'm getting into when I binge drink.
    Really? You blackout and say you know what you're getting into?
    I do it because I have some great times on it. And yes I drink a few the next day/night to get my head together, but I'm not an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink in nearly a week now but I'll be back on it soon, because I like drinking.
    Being an alcoholic is not about when you drink, it's about how you drink. The difference is an alcoholic can go days, weeks, even months without a drink, but when they do drink, they cannot stop until they are physically incapable of holding a glass.
    She sounds like a drunk overly dramatic teenager to me.
    No sunshine, you do.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 141 ✭✭g-punkteffekt


    in what way am I being overly dramatic?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 141 ✭✭g-punkteffekt


    We're applauding her for being brave enough to admit that she has a problem.

    Now that just sounds like Oprah Winfrey nonsense to me. Give her a kick up the arse and tell her to get her act together.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,361 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    I get blackouts every week, sometimes I do stupid stuff. But I know what I'm getting into when I binge drink. I do it because I have some great times on it. And yes I drink a few the next day/night to get my head together, but I'm not an alcoholic. I haven't had a drink in nearly a week now but I'll be back on it soon, because I like drinking.

    You are someone who has an awful lot of growing up to do.
    You actually think that it's perfectly acceptable to black out every week?
    I do hope you are not trolling this forum, because anyone with more than two brain cells would know that sort of behaviour is just plain stupid.
    She sounds like a drunk overly dramatic teenager to me.

    No, she sounds like someone who has wised up.
    You however do come accross as one.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 141 ✭✭g-punkteffekt


    Well it is perfectly acceptable, who is to tell me otherwise? As an adult am I not entitled to make my own decisions?
    I don't mean every week, I try not to get that drunk every week, but anytime I drink a lot, yes, I might not remember clearly coming home etc. It happens to everyone who drinks a lot on a night out.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,044 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    No it doesn't it is not normal behaviour to be blacking out or drinking that heavily.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,673 ✭✭✭Miss Fluff


    Well it is perfectly acceptable, who is to tell me otherwise? As an adult am I not entitled to make my own decisions?

    Yes, you are entitled to make your own decisions. I'd stay clear of giving Lady Lotts any meaningful or helpful advice though. Your posts have quite frankly been an awful waste of the two minutes it took to read them.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,333 ✭✭✭Zambia


    Best of Luck...

    See if you can get though tomorrow without drinking and take it from there. You may have to drop out of your social scene for a while.

    g-punkteffekt you are right to defend your drinking habits however every person in the country does not have your ability to consume to excess. Its your liver and your right to do so. It is not your right to judge others who have not your ability to consume to excess and not regret the effects. In time you will grow out of this like most of us did hopefully.


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