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  • #2


    That's really tough. My own experience is that I discovered my birth mother died only a few years after I was born. I can't say that's worse than your position, you have all my sympathy. Look, there are all kinds of people on this earth, some with empathy for others, and some with none. Seems like you've been dealt the dud card with your birth mother, although time might change that. In the meantime, you might want to investigate if she has other children who are adults.
    As for your birth dad - when I started my search my focus was on my birth mother, I didn't give a father a second thought. That did change over time, and it became a postive search. If you're lukewarm about the prospect, I'd say wait a while. But if your "need to know" starts to grow then go for it.

    I believe my birth father had a son, he was a teenager when I was born. Don’t think my mum had any more children.
    Thanks for the kind words and advice


  • #2


    Look it's tough @Me123me. I have resigned myself to never finding my birth mother. I was adopted through St Patrick's Guild and I now question everything I was told. I was told my parents married and went on to have four more children. I searched a few times myself and found nothing. I also some experts in tracing people to see what they could find and it all came up blank so reluctantly I have given up searching and if it's meant to happen it will but I am leaving sleeping dogs lie. I know my mother's name and have my original Birth Certificate so that's something. Also through St Patrick's Guild I was told my natural father died a number of years ago.

    I have been trying to search for 20 years and nowt so I am happy to leave it alone now. Good luck in your search and I hope it all works out.


  • #2


    ModeMadFan wrote: »
    Look it's tough @Me123me. I have resigned myself to never finding my birth mother. I was adopted through St Patrick's Guild and I now question everything I was told. I was told my parents married and went on to have four more children. I searched a few times myself and found nothing. I also some experts in tracing people to see what they could find and it all came up blank so reluctantly I have given up searching and if it's meant to happen it will but I am leaving sleeping dogs lie. I know my mother's name and have my original Birth Certificate so that's something. Also through St Patrick's Guild I was told my natural father died a number of years ago.

    I have been trying to search for 20 years and nowt so I am happy to leave it alone now. Good luck in your search and I hope it all works out.

    It is tough and thanks for your words and advice.
    I kinda feel the same. I take a lot of comfort from the fact she’s alive, they’ve contacted her, I’ve tried and no regrets.
    Not sure if I will do much more, the agency I have been dealing with Cunamh is closing at the end of the year. I started my search when I was 20, they came back to me when I was 25 having found her but it didn’t suit me to go through with anything at that time. Now 10 years later, just thought I better try now or never.
    No regrets :)


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