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Yellow

  • 01-01-2007 11:03PM
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14


    Hello people, howdy. Having personal problems is a real pain, it can make life miserable but remember, everyone has them. We are not alone and life must go on. Whenever your feeling down, think of all the peolpe who are worse off than you and would love your life!
    So..heres my problem and I would appreciate some helpful advice from genuine interpreters. A year ago my boyfriend of five years dumped me. Yes, very sad indeed. We were living together and I thought this was it...I was very content. And then I got sick and was diagnosed with clinical depression and anorexia. He visited me a couple of times after we broke up, he called me a couple of times but since that nothing. I'm devastated. When you love someone don't you care about them as a seperate individual. And if they have problems then you are concerned? But one or two phonecalls doesn't qualify as concern to me. What is this guys problem. He is no longer involved in my life and shows no interest for my well being. It makes me sick.
    I'm so sad and alone and cry all the time. Am I a loser or what? I find it difficult to meet new guys because depression is not exactly attractive.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    '
    Hello people, howdy. Having personal problems...I would appreciate some helpful advice from genuine interpreters...

    Sorry to hear sophie, I would find it offending if he did that and he send me no calls.

    All together that is I am not very experienced in this area and I am certainly not good at advice giving.

    There was a little confusion maybe in posting here, since your question sounds pretty serious...some replies on this posting have been in jest, and this particular issue seems too serious to joke about...

    It's best to post a new thread, so people will see it, otherwise it may not be seen?
    ...and once more, take care'


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,395 ✭✭✭Drift


    Can one of the mods move sophiemarie post to a seperate thread for her please. I'd like to help sm but I have no real experience in the matter. But hopefully if one of the mods makes it a seperate thread you will get more views and responses. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,192 ✭✭✭mrsdewinter


    hi sophiemarie,
    sounds like you've been through a rough time recently. you mightn't like what I have to say, but I think you should draw a line under your life with this guy. give yourself a little time and allow yourself to forget about him. there's a really nice man out there waiting for you. hope somebody else can shed more light on this.
    that's my tuppence worth


  • Moderators, Regional North East Moderators Posts: 12,742 Mod ✭✭✭✭cournioni


    hi sophiemarie,
    sounds like you've been through a rough time recently. you mightn't like what I have to say, but I think you should draw a line under your life with this guy. give yourself a little time and allow yourself to forget about him. there's a really nice man out there waiting for you. hope somebody else can shed more light on this.
    that's my tuppence worth
    I totally agree with this comment. The guy has moved on, it was very tough on you but you have to move on too. You obviously still love him but you have to move on for yourself. Try and join something like a club you are interested in, you can meet lots of cool people with the same interests as yourself in them. Before you know it you will have this guy in the back of your mind.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭Kell


    But one or two phonecalls doesn't qualify as concern to me. What is this guys problem.

    You should be asking yourself whats your problem. Expecting someone to call you is a very easy way of handing someone the ability to hurt you. You then subsequently blame them for hurting you and you dont get beyond that point. Ye are single people now, and though you are hurt by his indifference, he may have a load of reasons for it that you have to givce him credit for. When you stop expecting something from him, you'll stop hurting.
    I find it difficult to meet new guys because depression is not exactly attractive.

    Just from experience, and I roll this line out to everyone looking for a relationship, go easy on yourself and stop looking for a relationship to fill the gap left by the last one. When you get to the point of looking yourself in the eye and figuring that yes you can have a relationship free of neediness and because you actually want as opposed to need one, that is the time to get involved. Not before then.

    Lastly- are you receiving therapy for your depression?

    Happy new year BTW.

    K-


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,350 ✭✭✭Lust4Life


    Forget the guy for now.
    Just concentrate on getting yourself on an even plain.

    Anorexia is usually stirred by other problems.
    And depression is not easy to live with (for both you AND your partner). It takes a strong person to be the partner of someone who suffers from depression.
    Perhaps he did not feel he was strong enough for you to lean on for the rest of your life.

    That person is out there for you. It may take time. Have faith and take care of yourself.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser




    Hi Sophie, I read your other posts too, listen to me you need to check out your DIET/NUTRITION, epsecially after i read the other post, depression etc can be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain as a result from undernutrition caused by anorexia. Your body goes into starvation mode, you not only starved your body but your brain. It may take a while for the imbalance to settle. This causes an imbalance in brain chemicals, and therefore you may be slightly disorientation/your perspective has altered. I would seriously advice you to read thoroughly "Optimum nutrition for the Mind" by Patrick Holford (2003).Together with this, you need some good moral support, friends, family. Good Luck!!!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,787 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    HelpHere!! wrote:
    Hi Sophie, I read your other posts too, listen to me you need to check out your DIET/NUTRITION, epsecially after i read the other post, depression etc can be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain as a result from undernutrition caused by anorexia. Your body goes into starvation mode, you not only starved your body but your brain. It may take a while for the imbalance to settle. This causes an imbalance in brain chemicals, and therefore you may be slightly disorientation/your perspective has altered. I would seriously advice you to read thoroughly "Optimum nutrition for the Mind" by Patrick Holford (2003).Together with this, you need some good moral support, friends, family. Good Luck!!!!
    So, how much do you get for each advert for the book?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Victor wrote:
    So, how much do you get for each advert for the book?

    Absolutely nothing, unfortunately, unless you want to give me some money Victor!! The only reward here is the satisfaction that it might not only help someone else but also improve the mental health of our society which seems to be deteriorating rapidly!!! Talking from experience this book is amazing, and not from a business perspective as is implied!! I'm sorry that you feel that way Victor. But I would sincerely encourage and recommend people to read this book!!

    However, with diets/nutrition you need to be level headed when reading, keep diet balanced, and don't take it to the extremes if you are trying to improve a particular aspect of yourself, as it will have the counter-effect of what you are trying to achieve!

    God Bless!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7 Tumblina


    Hi look not sure about anorexia but big sis suffers from depression. I bring her regularly to out patients and also to Grow. This is kinda like group therapy without doctors people from all walks of life just talk to each other .Trust me it works YOU DON'T HAVE TO JOIN IN UNTIL YOUR READY.


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