Loneliness at Christmas

LegacyUser

As we all know, Christmas can either be the best of times or the worst of times. This Christmas has been a bit strange for me, in that I've been surrounded by family with a nice atmosphere, nothing happening to sour the mood. Yet I find that I feel quite lonely for some reason. I'm currently single, and haven't been in a relationship for some time, which I'm putting the feelings of loneliness down to, for lack of a better reason for it. Funnily enough, I didn't feel this way before today. Maybe the fact that it's Christmas has brought it on?

Anyway, I'm just wondering if any of you (particularly the single ones) feel the same way today?

Anti

I had this last xmas, being single then. But i got over it. Use the time you have to do your own thing, and some reflection about the year gone by. Also getting locked helps nicely

Faith

Unreg24102 wrote:

As we all know, Christmas can either be the best of times or the worst of times. This Christmas has been a bit strange for me, in that I've been surrounded by family with a nice atmosphere, nothing happening to sour the mood. Yet I find that I feel quite lonely for some reason. I'm currently single, and haven't been in a relationship for some time, which I'm putting the feelings of loneliness down to, for lack of a better reason for it. Funnily enough, I didn't feel this way before today. Maybe the fact that it's Christmas has brought it on?

Anyway, I'm just wondering if any of you (particularly the single ones) feel the same way today?

Aye, it's common OP. I'm surrounded by couples and it can be annoying at times. My brother got married a few months ago, so he and his wife are still in the honeymoon stage and all cute and happy. Most of my friends are in relationships too. I just try and keep myself distracted and not think about it.

dvega

Yes common is only too true. My gf and i split a few months ago plus on top of that most of my family are gone over seas for christmas.

Dunno what im gona do stephans night or new year eve,most of my friends are in relationships and i have to tag along with em but i wouldnt let it get
to me and neither should you,it'll be all over before you know it.

Ruu_Old

Faith wrote:

Aye, it's common OP. I'm surrounded by couples and it can be annoying at times. My brother got married a few months ago, so he and his wife are still in the honeymoon stage and all cute and happy. Most of my friends are in relationships too. I just try and keep myself distracted and not think about it.

Yep, probably the best thing to do and above all, enjoy Christmas as best you can and try not to get too downhearted.

dceire

Unreg24102 wrote:

As we all know, Christmas can either be the best of times or the worst of times. This Christmas has been a bit strange for me, in that I've been surrounded by family with a nice atmosphere, nothing happening to sour the mood. Yet I find that I feel quite lonely for some reason. I'm currently single, and haven't been in a relationship for some time, which I'm putting the feelings of loneliness down to, for lack of a better reason for it. Funnily enough, I didn't feel this way before today. Maybe the fact that it's Christmas has brought it on?

Anyway, I'm just wondering if any of you (particularly the single ones) feel the same way today?

Yea i'm not far off being in the same boat as you, i havent been in relationship for a while i've been sort of seeing someone for a few months & things seem to have gone sour which isnt helping matters.

As you said just try to keep yourself distracted, i actually cant wait to get back to college & work & a return to normality.

miamee

Unreg24102 wrote:

As we all know, Christmas can either be the best of times or the worst of times. This Christmas has been a bit strange for me, in that I've been surrounded by family with a nice atmosphere, nothing happening to sour the mood. Yet I find that I feel quite lonely for some reason. I'm currently single, and haven't been in a relationship for some time, which I'm putting the feelings of loneliness down to, for lack of a better reason for it. Funnily enough, I didn't feel this way before today. Maybe the fact that it's Christmas has brought it on?

Anyway, I'm just wondering if any of you (particularly the single ones) feel the same way today?

Have felt like this the past few Christmases as well, not so much Christmas day as I spend that with family but the following days can drag on interminably, with last year being the worst ever, very depressing. Like that all my friends are married & have family & in-laws to visit etc. The key is to try & organise something for every day, even one thing so it's a reason to look forward to the day & get up & dressed, it'll be over before you know it.
In actual fact I feel like I don't have enough time this year for a change with a college project to get done & going away for New Years~! (Also one of the most depressing nights of the year for singles -but it'll all be over this day next week )

missgiggles

I'm feeling a bit lonely as a singleton to, more today then yesterday - there isn't much to do Christmas day but my plans to arrange drinks with friends this evening sunk like a stone as most seem to be visiting the in-laws. Trying to keep busy and not to let it get to me.

Botswana

I'm the same. I'm not from Ireland and I don't really have any friends of family here.

So today I stayed in bed until now (6.30ish!) and I will go to bed early with a DVD.

I'm quite lonely... a little sad... but I know the future will be ok.

neon_glows

yeah i could have written your exact post OP but suppose we have to get on with it, maybe next year we should try pair of some of the lonely boardies, haha :-)

Sparky

Yeah Christmas can be lonely time when you're single. I have felt the same over the past few days alright. But I like to think there is light at the end of the tunnel. See what your friends are doing over the coming week and try not to think about it too much.

Jammyc

Thought i might revive this thread

How does anyone cope with it?

BJC

I'm in the same position (single) as the OP as of today. I get lonely easy enough, but I can pull myself out of it with distractions. Just stay busy till it's over

LolaLuv

I can relate OP. Everyone I know either lives in America or has gone back to America for Christmas. I'm also single, so I'll be by myself on the big day. Oddly enough, though, I'm not feeling lonely at all. On the contrary, I'm really enjoying being alone. I've been taking advantage of everything going on this season; going to concerts, checking out the decorations, attending plays, etc. I've found that I've been more in the Christmas spirit this year than I have been since I was a kid. I don't know if you're the type of person who likes to do things alone, but it might be worth a try!

omgiluvxmas

PillyPen wrote: »

I can relate OP. Everyone I know either lives in America or has gone back to America for Christmas. I'm also single, so I'll be by myself on the big day. Oddly enough, though, I'm not feeling lonely at all. On the contrary, I'm really enjoying being alone. I've been taking advantage of everything going on this season; going to concerts, checking out the decorations, attending plays, etc. I've found that I've been more in the Christmas spirit this year than I have been since I was a kid. I don't know if you're the type of person who likes to do things alone, but it might be worth a try!

ur post made me get a good feeling inside.

[Jackass]

This is gonna be a pretty tough xmas for me I reckon. Not long single and still hurting.

Suppose you've just got to get on with things and hope it passes quickly and you can start a brand new year!!

LolaLuv

omgiluvxmas wrote: »

ur post made me get a good feeling inside.

Lol, that's lovely. Glad I could spread the love!

Captain Ginger

I'm not single but my girlfriend has gone back to the USA for Christmas with her family so now I feel like Christmas is going to drag as I'm just going to be waiting for her to come back.

Terpsichore

Yep it can be tough, but:
-Treat yourself to good food and wine, the same way that you would if in company. Go a bit mad even: after all there is only one person to treat!
-Stack up on your favorite movies and have the laziest day of the year.
-Would it be an idea to organise a Xmas walk/picnic for all the lonely people out there that day? Just wondering and internet is the best way to try to organise this. Mulled wine from a flask anyone?
-Get on a Paddy Waggon type tour, you're garanteed to have fun and to meet lots of great people from around the world. I did that one year as I had to stay for work; and as my family leaves abroad it felt very lonely But the tour turned out to be really really good and warm to the heart.
Hope you find a way to cheer yourself up!
All the best OP... and Happy Xmas!

SRFC90

[Jackass] wrote: »

This is gonna be a pretty tough xmas for me I reckon. Not long single and still hurting.

Suppose you've just got to get on with things and hope it passes quickly and you can start a brand new year!!

Was in the same position last year, keep the head up buddy!

Lockstep

Most of my friends and my girlfriend are going back home for Christmas but it should be grand, I'll just get morbidly obese and develop a massive thumb from too much channel surfing. I don't get enough of a chance to do that during the year so I'll be happy out.

Karen_*

PillyPen wrote: »

I can relate OP. Everyone I know either lives in America or has gone back to America for Christmas. I'm also single, so I'll be by myself on the big day. Oddly enough, though, I'm not feeling lonely at all. On the contrary, I'm really enjoying being alone. I've been taking advantage of everything going on this season; going to concerts, checking out the decorations, attending plays, etc. I've found that I've been more in the Christmas spirit this year than I have been since I was a kid. I don't know if you're the type of person who likes to do things alone, but it might be worth a try!

Fair play to you Pillypen. Thats a great post and I was feeling awful about Christmas till I read it. Going to do my best to enjoy it now:D

LolaLuv

Karen_* wrote: »

Fair play to you Pillypen. Thats a great post and I was feeling awful about Christmas till I read it. Going to do my best to enjoy it now:D

Thanks! That's sad that you were feeling awful about Christmas though. So common at this time of the year, usually I experience it myself. I think another thing that's helped is I've been listening to all my favorite Christmas carols on YouTube and have been watching a Christmas movie almost every night. It's a Wonderful Life, Bad Santa, and A Christmas Story always make the holidays better!

OP, here's my Christmas playlist. Maybe some carols will brighten up your season.

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=DDCB1740B16F6F80

LegacyUser

Hi OP. I know how you feel since when I came here 18 months ago after the relationship with my previous boyfriend had ended and I came here to Ireland knowing absolutley nobody.

It was so tempting to me to just curl up into a ball and become isolated but I opened up and made friends at work, mainly Irish and since then I have had a great time and have not looked back. Lose the lonely feelings and losen up. You are young so you have a full life to lead. Get out enjoy life and meet people. Thats exactly what I did. I cant remember much about last Christmas since it was largely a haze. ) drink induced that.

Lockstep

Karen_* wrote: »

Fair play to you Pillypen. Thats a great post and I was feeling awful about Christmas till I read it. Going to do my best to enjoy it now:D

What she said.