Met a Girl

LegacyUser

I'm sorry for starting another one of these threads, but I need some advice.

I'm male, 26, single.

On Saturday night I was out with a bunch of people I didn't really know. I do some voluntary (not charity) work with a guy, and decided on Saturday night that seeing as we had no 'work' that weekend we'd make the most of it and head out for a few drinks. He was meeting a few of his mates, so I said I'd head in with them, always good to make a few new friends. He's not a really good mate of mine by any stretch, but we get on well in what we do.

So, we were in one place with my mate and two other friends and one of their girlfriends. I got introduced around and started chatting about the match etc, etc. Then another girl arrived. Got introduced to her, usual small talk ensues. I was mostly chatting to my mate, but chatting generally to everyone too. I'm not a particularly shy person, but one of my faults is that I take a bit of time to find I trust someone, male or female.

I have had some bad relationships with girls in the past, I have been hurt in a big way by one, if not two girls. My friends say I'm too picky when it comes to girls too, I probably am tbh.

Anyway, my going out on this particular night wasn't me going 'on the pull', I never do that, it was just a couple of drinks with a friend and a chance to get away from our usual surroundings.

We moved on to another bar, and as the night moved on I found myself chatting to this other girl for a good while. We had a bit in common, had both travelled, and were getting on very well, I thought. Myself and the lads were dancing away, and I went over to her and said to her 'Come on, get up and have a dance with us' - and she did, nice one! After a few songs she sat back down with the other girl, her friend, who had become very drunk. Head betweek her legs, falling asleep drunk. It was obvious that she was going to need some looking after, so the girl I was chatting to took her to the toilet, where she was sick, and they decided to go home.

We said goodbye, it was great to meet you, be nice to see you again sometime, the usual niceties, and off she went. I didn't get her number.

On the way home ourselves, one of the other lads commented that he thought myself and herself were getting on very well, and that I should have done something about it.

I was making myself a sandwich on Sunday evening, and it hit me. I should have done something about it. I mean here was a really great girl, that I had gotten on really with, why didn't I just ask for her number? Thing is, I have never asked a girl for her number just like that. All of my previous relationships have been with girls I have known for a while.

So, the question is, how the hell do I go about getting her number, or something, without seeming like a desperate weirdo?

She's not a friend of my mate who I went out with, she's a friend of his friend's girlfriend. Is it too long a link back to ask him, to ask his mate, to ask his girlfriend to give her friend my number? Does that even make sense?

I wouldn't say I'm actively looking for a relationship, but I just think that there was a girl who I got on really well with, and I'd like to see her again, and just see if anything had even a chance of happening.

Ho-hum, I know it doesn't make a blind bit of difference to your life, but if you've read this far, maybe you could offer me some kind of advice.

Thanks for reading.

Trinity

I think most girls would be flattered to know that a guy went to the trouble of tracking down her number.

get it, you know you can or if not give your number to someone from her and tell her you enjoyed her company and would she like to go for a drink.

the worst you will get is a no but at least you wont have any regrets.

Go for it.

Ruu_Old

I guess you could give it a try and least you will know that you tried anyway and don't be afraid in future to go for it, you have nothing to lose. Good luck.

kenfjt

Go for it. You should never have regrets there even worst then hearing no. Anyway a couple of texts won't take long to find out her number but do it now

Black Swan

Howtoget wrote:

So, the question is, how the hell do I go about getting her number, or something, without seeming like a desperate weirdo?

She's not a friend of my mate who I went out with, she's a friend of his friend's girlfriend. Is it too long a link back to ask him, to ask his mate, to ask his girlfriend to give her friend my number? Does that even make sense?

Ask. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Dan133269

even if you can't bring yourself to get the number, if she's your friend's girlfriend's friend then chances are they will all be heading out together again sometime, so say it to your friend to let you know the next time he's going out for a drink, maybe you could even get chatting to his girlfriend who is her friend and she could probably tell you if she's interested.

Marksie

Howtoget wrote:

She's not a friend of my mate who I went out with, she's a friend of his friend's girlfriend. Is it too long a link back to ask him, to ask his mate, to ask his girlfriend to give her friend my number? Does that even make sense?
Thanks for reading.

No it isnt.. there is a saying, a dumb priest never got a parish.

You mentioned that you have been hurt before.... the past shouldnt be a guide to the future.
You will never know how it might turn out unless you try.

But if you do start dating... put aside fears and worries about will i get hurt... enjoy the now and the person you are with... see how it develops.

dr.bollocko

Of course its always going to take a while to turn "OH, ****! I wish I had asked her for her NUMBER!!!" into "Thank ****, I am so glad I asked her for her number."
I totally think that if you think the girl is worth it, go and hunt for that number, but also, remember for the next time you meet a random nice girl in a club, try and get those digits!

tbh

DOn't beat yourself up over it too much, because although you got on great with this girl, it doesn't mean that you've missed your one chance in life to be happy. If you can get her number, great, but if you can't, just remember this situation the next time something similar happens, and ask for the number before she goes that's the point of mistakes - we learn from them.

hope it works out, you sound like a nice guy.


edit: sorry dr. bollocko didn't read your post - you beat me to it

Motley Crue

Howtoget wrote:

I was making myself a sandwich on Sunday evening, and it hit me. I should have done something about it. .

Was it a good sandwich lol

Seriously u should have just asked her for her number, try and locate her, and go for it

Alter-Ego

In future, just ask for the number!! I do it, even when i don't want her number. I did get shot down at the weekend but it was better than regretting not getting the number.

Heyes

definately not too long a link, absolutaly definately go for it. she seems keen, your keen, whats to loose. Id say she would be chuffed to hear from you, just by what you said.

So you know what to do tomorrow.... stop thinking and get her number.

Good luck

vorbis

agree completely with Alter-Ego. Its a good habit to get into. I was like you for a while feeling it would be somehow awkward to ask for the number. Now, I do it without a thought if I've been chatting to the girl for a while. And remember a number is just a number, it doesn't mean much.

GrumPy

Howtoget wrote:

I was making myself a sandwich on Sunday evening, and it hit me. I should have done something about it.

haha, had me laughing!!
Gotta love those sandwich related mental breakthroughs....

phantom_lord

Irish GrumPy wrote:

haha, had me laughing!!
Gotta love those sandwich related mental breakthroughs....

Hmmm, a bit of cheese and then...ahh bollix I should have gotten her number!


The last girl I was with, I asked my friend, who happened to be her friend, for her number, she was pretty flattered. I think...
Just go for it.


If you were getting on so well with her that night, it should have been easier to get it off her.





cue next pi thread....I got this girls num but I dunno what to say....

tbh

phantom_lord wrote:

cue next pi thread....I got this girls num but I dunno what to say....

"Fancy a sandwich?"

did you try to get her number anyway PL, or are you chalking this one up?

Torq

kenfjt wrote:

Go for it. You should never have regrets there even worst then hearing no. Anyway a couple of texts won't take long to find out her number but do it now

Totally agree, go for it, if you don't you'll never know. I took a chance a few years ago to find a girl I'd met on a night out. We are getting married next year.
Keep well,
Torq

Kell

Howtoget wrote:

Is it too long a link back to ask him, to ask his mate, to ask his girlfriend to give her friend my number?

No its not.

Howtoget wrote:

I wouldn't say I'm actively looking for a relationship, but I just think that there was a girl who I got on really well with, and I'd like to see her again, and just see if anything had even a chance of happening..

Given the amount of detail you put into your post its not surprising you are thinking about this WAAY to much.

Jeebus- does everyone really do this much pondering these days before actually asking someone out? It really is easy (TM pending). Everything is easy- thinking about the possible pitfalls make things "appear" to be difficult.

Grab life by the bóllix and just get her number. Then ask her out (while trying not to plan your wedding day) and see how it goes. Easy peezey Japaneezey.

K-

b3t4

Definately get her number. There's nothing to loose.

I was out with mates and got talking to this guy. He didn't ask for my number at the time but went to the effort of asking a friend of mine for my number. I think it was about a week and half after I met him that he text me. I was flattered that he'd put in so much effort. I met him for a date but nothing more came of it.

You won't look desperate and too much time hasn't past.

Best of luck,
A.

pocono

Just read this thread, and although I don't remember much about chatting to yer one on the weekend, I'm pretty sure we got on very well. I've asked for her number in an equally convoluted manner, so here's hopin.....

Zaph

pocono, we would appreciate it if you didn't drag up two and a half year old threads again in the future.

Thread closed.