Neighbour Kids Stealing From My House

iguana

I posted on here in parenting a couple of months back about the kids in my street becoming very friendly with me and always wanting to be in my house. I became more polite but distant and eventually they got bored, we'd chat for a few minutes if I met them on the street but they would rarely ask to come into the house.

Then I got puppies at the weekend. The girl nextdoor, she's 7, was incredibly excited. The first night I let her come around, knowing how I felt about puppies when I was 7, though making it clear I didn't want her climbing over the fence. She came round as did her older brother, I think he's 11.

At one stage he went into the house, supposedly to use the bathroom but when he was gone I noticed some of my husband's playstation games gone. Tbh, I looked because I was suspicious while he was here but with the kids and the pups I was too distracted. I checked the games as there was one in particular he often asked to borrow but because of it's age rating we said he would have to get his mum to come and talk to us about it first. Which he never did, as I assume his mum would have told him he wasn't old enough.

The next day I asked him about it and though he tried to bluff I told him my husband was very angry and if he didn't give it back now, and the ones we had loaned him before, my husband would be calling into his mother once he got home from work. He ran off and came back a few minutes later with the game. I was relieved to get it sorted out but annoyed that the kid was so brazen about it and didn't even apologise.

Today his sister and some friends called around to play with the pups. I said they could play with them in the garden for a little while. Shortly afterwards her brother called to the door to be let in. I decided to tell him no for now as he had stolen from my house and not even apologised. He made up a lame excuse and eventually gave a pretty pathetic apology. I told him I'd have to talk to my husband about it and maybe he could come in another time, but not today.

They whole thing has left me feeling incredibly uncomfortable. I know kids do stupid things like this, but I don't like being stolen from. I'm not really sure what to do from here. Do I carry on as normal from tomorrow? Should I have spoken to his mother? I thought that if I could sort it without getting him in trouble it would be for the best, but maybe I was wrong not to include his mum. Any advice?

LegacyUser

Keep de ankle biters out of de house !

It's that simple.

seamus

I would say you should still speak to his mum, explain everything. Kids are by nature incredibly selfish, and often young kids think nothing of taking something that they want so long as no-one sees them.

If the mum decides to ignore you or accuses you of lying, then neither child should be allowed around your house anymore.

koneko

Agree, I would talk to the mum, see how she reacts, and take it from there.

chamlis

I think I see where you were going with not telling his mum. Too much hassle, and you never know how people are going to react. The other thing of course is that he could resent you and become your worst nightmare. Little sh!tes.
I'd have done the same, but you probably handdled it better.

Blazer

what are his parents like? Are they nice people etc?
That fact that he returned the game indicates that they are good people and his lame apology could possibly indicate he's ashamed of what he did..
kids do things on the spur of the moment without thought of the consequences..try talking to him and maybe asking why he did it..etc

MojoMaker

Mathew Reilly wrote:

That fact that he returned the game indicates that they are good people and his lame apology could possibly indicate he's ashamed of what he did..

I doubt the parents knew anything about the theft or the return. Most likely he was sh*t scared of eventually being found out however. The fact he returned the game indicates nothing about his parents. The fact he took the game in the first place also indicates nothing about his parents. Sometimes kids are just mean for no reason. It's what usually separates adults from kids.

Rb

He probably so promptly returned the game in fear of how his parents would react.
I'd say talk to him first, ask him what compelled him to steal from you after you being so generous, and outline the implications should he do it again i.e that you won't lend him stuff nor let him into the house again, as well as talking to his parents about it(let him know you'll keep it a secret between you two for now).
If he does it again after that, go straight to his parents and never let the little sh1t back on your property.

iguana

I think I'll let it go for now. I've let him know I was upset with him for his actions. He missed out on playing with the pups today and I'm hoping he was just embarrased, and that's why his apology was fairly lame.

I'll give him one more chance and if he does it again I'll go to his parents.

Blazer

MojoMaker wrote:

I doubt the parents knew anything about the theft or the return. Most likely he was sh*t scared of eventually being found out however. The fact he returned the game indicates nothing about his parents. The fact he took the game in the first place also indicates nothing about his parents. Sometimes kids are just mean for no reason. It's what usually separates adults from kids.

actually it does.. if they were scumbags you'd think they've give a toss what their kid stole? the majority of them wouldn't..

abetarrush

feed them to ur dog I say

TempestSabre

Personally I think you are playing with fire letting other peoples kids into your house.

athena 2000

seamus wrote:

I would say you should still speak to his mum, explain everything. Kids are by nature incredibly selfish, and often young kids think nothing of taking something that they want so long as no-one sees them.

If the mum decides to ignore you or accuses you of lying, then neither child should be allowed around your house anymore.

I think this is the definitive solution. I'd add to it and say that if do decide to allow them into your home again, that you always have another friend or family member with you when they are there.

Don't feel any false guilt for not being a "nice neighbor." To neglect giving Junior Stickyfingers direct consequences is not doing him any favours in the long term. He obviously understands right from wrong - he just doesn't care at the moment.

Victor

abetarrush wrote:

feed them to ur dog I say

Banned.