Grandmother Ill.. Not sure what to do

LegacyUser

Im pretty down at the moment so I'm going to keep this short.

My grandmother has reared me with my mother my entire life, done everything a mother would of. Right now she is in hostipal.. She fell asleep the other night and we believe she had a stroke in her sleep.

Now she won't wake up. I don't want to visit her ( I know this sounds awful ) for I believe it will be too upsetting.

The thing is I don't know what to do, how to react or will she ever wake up? She was just about to come out of hostipal before this happened.

Help?

ck100

the worlds a strange and harsh place. what do you think she would want you to do?
she looked after you now roles are reversed. good luck

Ruu_Old

Go visit her, talk to her and she will hear to you. I hope things work out for the best. She would want you there, I'm sure of it.

LegacyUser

But I cant bear to go and have her not being able to answer back..

What are the chances of her waking?
Also if she does wake theres a big change she'll be in alot of pain..............

CathyMoran

I know how scared and confused you are. My mum went into a coma after having surgery for a brain haemorrage (a type of stroke) almost 2 years ago...seeing her for the first time after she went to sleep was one of the hardest things that I have ever done, I think that I did it on autopilot...for me, I was scared of crying in front of her (in case she knew that I was there and I got her worried), scared of how I would feel seeing her like that (would that memory stick with me, not the memory of her in times past).

Nobody here can say if she will wake up - my mum did, but we had to wait 3 long weeks before she opened her eyes and 6 long months before she was my mum again in any form - but even if she does not wake up the time that you spend with her will be special. I used to call it bonding time for me, I made sure that nothing was left unsaid that I wanted her to know (ie, I told her again and again how much I love her).

My thoughts go out to you at this time and if you need someone to talk to please feel free to PM.

justafriend?

My heart goes out to you.

I cant say i know exactly how you feel because you would appear to be even closer to your grandmother than i was to my grandparents.

My grandparents lived with us for ten years and i was really close to both of them - my grandfather in particular, he was never in hospital a day in his life until his last three - he lived into his late 90's. He was an amazing person who i was lucky to know - he only stopped cycling his bike at just under 90!

Although it was terribly difficult for me to see my grandfather who was always so strong and vibrant - you really couldn't have met a more active 95+ year old - lying unconscious in a hospital bed i am very glad that i had that time with him.

He suffered a minor stroke stroke and on going into hospital suffered a further series of attacks by the second day he was unconscious... i sat with him on the morning before he died and i clearly remember him grasping my hand and calling my mother's name! I am convinced that he knew there was somebody there and it gave me a very precious chance to say goodbye and tell him how much i loved him!

Though it did break my heart i was very glad that i could be there for him and i wouldn't change this for an instant!

I hope this might help you come to your own decision - my advice would be to go see your grandmother tell her how much you love her!

I hope your grandmother recovers and that you and your family get the support you need at such a difficult time.

LegacyUser

justafriend? wrote:

My heart goes out to you.

I cant say i know exactly how you feel because you would appear to be even closer to your grandmother than i was to my grandparents.

My grandparents lived with us for ten years and i was really close to both of them - my grandfather in particular, he was never in hospital a day in his life until his last three - he lived into his late 90's. He was an amazing person who i was lucky to know - he only stopped cycling his bike at just under 90!

Although it was terribly difficult for me to see my grandfather who was always so strong and vibrant - you really couldn't have met a more active 95+ year old - lying unconscious in a hospital bed i am very glad that i had that time with him.

He suffered a minor stroke stroke and on going into hospital suffered a further series of attacks by the second day he was unconscious... i sat with him on the morning before he died and i clearly remember him grasping my hand and calling my mother's name! I am convinced that he knew there was somebody there and it gave me a very precious chance to say goodbye and tell him how much i loved him!

Though it did break my heart i was very glad that i could be there for him and i wouldn't change this for an instant!

I hope this might help you come to your own decision - my advice would be to go see your grandmother tell her how much you love her!

I hope your grandmother recovers and that you and your family get the support you need at such a difficult time.

Thank you, this advice helps alot..
3 weeks for you must have been a long waiting time.