Ghosts and Privacy

Zillah

Heres one for you.

Many people believe that their dead loved ones watch over them. People often talk about how they felt the presence of their grandmother/parents etc during a time of need or simply about their day to day lives. They are comforted by this and feel that they have a protector of sorts.

This raises an interesting question. Just how much do the dead know about you? What if its not a good thing? If a husband cheated on his wife, who then died, does she know about it now? She loved him dearly and is as good a candidate for postmortem guardianship as any one. Did she suffer a great shock in her ethereal existence? Did she find out about his porn stash under the stairs? Does she know about the time he won thousands with a scratch card and spent it on a golfing weekend?

Does your grandmother now know that you weren't who she thought you were? That the good boy act was just that? Does she see you when you pick up some girl for a one night stand? When you do a line of coke?

(Others thoughts have arise that will appear in thread two!)

Stoner

that's very interseting Zillah,

I asked a similar questing in a different forum about a year ago, but mine was more in line of proving etc like some old guy coming back from the dead to tell you where he stashed his cash etc.
alot of the stuff you hear back is generic , along the lines of "so and so is watching you and loves you very much etc"
for example you never hear stuff like "your granny loves you, but she is concerend abuot the content of your secret DVD collection" LOL
Anyway maybe there is a limit to how much influence a message can have, like finding money would change your life etc.
I've had responses about how really good responses have been received etc but they did not hold water for me. I expect to hear more due to this comment, I'm not saying that messages are not received, just that they dont really seem to be that detailed or at least the various opinions people have of someone do not seem to change between life an death, i.e if they liked you befre they died then they still do regardless of what you are really like.

magnumlady

I've been wondering about that kind of thing too, except mine is more like do they see you use the toilet.....freeky.

imprezza

magnumlady wrote:

I've been wondering about that kind of thing too, except mine is more like do they see you use the toilet.....freeky.

I've had that awful thought myself sometimes but from what I believe they don't have the same attitude, like when souls pass on to the next world the human body is like the clothes you've taken off, and because you're existing on a higher plane material things and body functions :eek: wouldnt appear to them like they do to us, if you see what I mean. And I can't imagine my Gran wanting to watch me on the loo.:o

kshiel

No one really knows what its like to be dead or a spirit so we can only speculate. For me I do think we would find out what people really thought of us and what they did wrong on us in our time on this plane,I also think we get to feel what it was like for that person when we did something bad or nasty to them. I guess they have a better way of dealing with emontion pain on that plane than we do on this one. Or maybe not, there are stories of people been haunted by someone alomst and sometime driving that person to insanty. Hopfully they are not true. As for messages coming true, we have no way of knowing if someone did get a message somewhere in the world of where the money is or a wife coming back to say I know you cheated on me you dirty pig, unless the people who receive those messages are willing to stand up and take the red face for it so to speak. (would you)

I dont think spirits would be that interested in our toliet activities because who would be. If we take it that people who are passed maintane pretty much the same personality on both sides of life and death then I would assume that the mundane acts done during the day would not interest them in the least unless they found watching you going to the toilet when they were alive pretty good.

ladybirdirl

I agree with the comments made about the vague messages - Stoner I think,apologies if I have credited it to the wrong person.
My only caveat would be a personal story. My Gran died last year, I wasn't particlarly close to her. Then I had a reading done at the end of that year when I was going through a bit of personal rough stuff. My Gran was really independant, took off to live in London after her hubby died etc and wanted all girls to be the same. Anyway as I was extracating myself from a bad thing I had this reading and I got this message saying that I should keep going with the path I was taking and I would be better for doing it(which I am) and that I should never have given up my independance in the first place as she wouldn't have done that.

So after all that my point is yes most messages are vague and I wonder if they are genuine but I believe that this message actually came from her because of the detail. Hope that make sense

Ladybird:)

kshiel

Unfortunatly it is up to the person receiving the message to judge wheather the person giving the message (vague or informative) is geniune or not. There are a lot of con-artists out there and there are a lot of geniune people to. Thats just the world we live in. I will stop now as this seems to be getting off topic.

stevenmu

It's a good question Zillah, i have wondered a few times what my granny (a very strong catholic) would make of me now. I think what it comes down to is the nature of ghosts, or we could probably even go beyond just ghosts and onto the nature of spirits. We've talked about this before and you made a good point

Zillah wrote:

But I think the biggest problem is if there really are dead people that still think, they're unlikely to think like living people. They don't have a brain. They have whatever it is they have, but its not a brain. This could be why ghosts seem to behave in such a strange way. Why they're inconsistent, and often confused. They couldn't see time and space the way we do. Hence, a ghost hunter could ask for a knock, and get one. But a scientist will want a knock twenty times, on demand to prove that there is something intelligent behind it, but it may not be intelligent as we understand it. But it still thinks its a person.

So when we're talking about ghosts or spirits, we're talking about non-corporeal entities which would percieve the physical world in a completely different way then we would. This means a lot of things.

One thing is that our concept of relationships between people, be they family or romantic, are based firmly in our physical existence. While the romantice notion of two people being in lvoe for all of eternity may be nice, and people would like the idea that they'll be reunited with dead loved ones when they too pass on, I don't see any real reason to see it like that. In the case of a dead wife learning that her husband had cheated on her, I don't think she would be too concerned over it. I don't see why she would be all that more connected to him than to anyone else, or even all that concerned about what happened to her in her physical life. Would she even still be a 'her' ? There is the concept of soul mates, but I don't know how that would apply to the spirit world, and it's largely ignored here on earth anyway.

The same would apply to porn stashes, lotto wins and one night stands. Such things would mean little to nothing to people who have passed over. At least they'd mean little by themselves. I'd imagine that some form of emotion would survive to the other side, and through that some form of basic morality in that making people happy is good, making people sad is bad. So having a one night stand say may not be bad in itself, but if it made the other person unhappy, then it would be. I'm not sure what I'm basing that on, I suppose it's just too hard to imagine any kind of existence where making others suffer would be considered ok.

Motley Crue

Zillah wrote:

This raises an interesting question. Just how much do the dead know about you?

Ive done stuff behind closed doors im ashamed off, but never anything I think would warrant an investigation. Furthermore, i do believe, or rather i want to believe, that those who went before you can look out for you. at very least, it gives me something to believe in after death.

but yes im fully convinced at very least that this is possible, that if you were cheating on ur wife as u say, and your wife found out after she died that she would attempt to take her revenge.

ive always found that bad things happen to me in clusters, and good things in clusters too. people say this is because negative or positive attitudes influenced by actions can have negative or positive future affects depending on 'how the chain began' if u like.

i dont think its got to do with attitudes all the time, i think sometimes its the spirit looking out for you, or in some cases punishing you for doing something u no is wrong and theyd be disapointed in letting you that they know

what about this john edwards character, isnt that what he bases his thing on, that he can communicate with the spirits of the dead?

tbh

a girl I know had an abortion a few years ago without telling anyone in her family. A year afterwards, her granny died, and she was very upset at the prospect -as she put it - of her granny going to heaven and meeting the child she had aborted and being angry with her. It was really very hard for her to cope with. I think, if there is an afterlife - and I presume the majority of regulars to this forum assume there is - you can't apply human traits to spirits. Like, I was telling her I guessed her Granny would feel sad that this girl had to go through the abortion on her own, but as she was now in heaven, she would understand and not be angry. And of course, all spirits were human once, so the majority of them would have stuff they wouldn't necessarily want people to see!

Aisling&M

tbh wrote:

a girl I know had an abortion a few years ago without telling anyone in her family. A year afterwards, her granny died, and she was very upset at the prospect -as she put it - of her granny going to heaven and meeting the child she had aborted and being angry with her. It was really very hard for her to cope with. I think, if there is an afterlife - and I presume the majority of regulars to this forum assume there is - you can't apply human traits to spirits. Like, I was telling her I guessed her Granny would feel sad that this girl had to go through the abortion on her own, but as she was now in heaven, she would understand and not be angry. And of course, all spirits were human once, so the majority of them would have stuff they wouldn't necessarily want people to see!

I completely agree. Human standards are important to us while we are human. With the bigger picture in mind and in view after death I believe it is much easier to accept the inevitable flaws and failings of our human selves and others....and should a passed loved one know of something so upsetting that we did/had did onto us, I'm fairly sure that all they will worry about is how it affected us and attempt to aid our healing rather than judging the mistake.

When it comes to going potty, I say inwardly but LOUD.......this is my private time, no spirits or ghosts!