Asking a gal out

LegacyUser

There's this girl who lives near me. We often take the same bus in the morning to work. We get on the same stop and get off the same spot too So not only she lives near me but works near me as well. She seem very nice and I'd like to ask her out. We haven't spoke before and on top of that I am a bit shy. Not sure how to approach her to ask her out.

Any advice on how to break the ice with her and ask her out is greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

lostone

Ummmm....just off the top of my head...walk up sit beside her and say...hey i see you all the time on this bus but we have never actually spoken a word...im 'name' *extend hand* nice to meet you...then talk about anything you want....w/e you want i cant really give you that...


Sucks being shy huh...i used to be overly shy around girls but just breath...relax its not that big a deal...talk about anything it dont really matter....think of topics before that will prolly help until you get good and are not as nervous...i find its actually a skill to be able to talk to women well...over time you will get better...talk about something tangible in the current area...say the crzy hobo who lives near the bus stop or something like that...you get what im saying...and good luck...talk a few days as you see her all the time then ask for an email or number or whatever or just aks to go out right away but if your shy i would opt for email for msn...or phone. MSN is good since you have all the time in the world to think of what you want to say...go get em tiger...lol :cool:


*edit*....read what i wrote...ask her may i have a seat first...or strike up a conversation like i said then say may i have a seat...lol...good luck

justafriend?

If i were you i woudl start by talking to her tommorrow morning... take a deep breath...and you should find that its really easy to break the ice...find somethng to comment on ... it can be something as simple as what time is it...?dublin bus is always so unreliable... Most importantly smile at her...

then the next morning it shouldn't be so hard to talk to her... if you keep trying for a little more conversation.. who knows where it might lead you....

Ruu_Old

Start off each day with something small about nothing in particular and then a little bit more each day and you'll find that maybe she will open up a bit more to you. Good luck.

Colm_OReilly

Good advice here so far.

My thoughts are, start talking to her, without the intention of getting something from her - a date.

The only way through fear is courage. When you're afraid of something and you "do courage" you gain "confidence."

Just a funny comment that came to mind when I read lostone's thoughts on being funny and msn. I was talking to a girl who'd met a guy recently but he rang her instead of txting her, which she was used to. She didn't like it since she couldn't be witty, as she said, like she could with a txt message.

Colm

Kell

Colm_OReilly wrote:

I was talking to a girl who'd met a guy recently but he rang her instead of txting her, which she was used to. She didn't like it since she couldn't be witty, as she said, like she could with a txt message.

The state of communication these days eh? Pfft.

OP- grow a spine and just ask her out. Really, its that easy. The answer will be yes or no.

K-

cinnamon

Kell wrote:

OP- grow a spine and just ask her out. Really, its that easy. The answer will be yes or no.

No I don't think this is a good idea. I would be really freaked out if a stranger came up to me and asked me out, even if he was cute. It looks a bit desperate or something.
I think the advice that has already been given is what the OP should do - strike up a conversation, keep it really light, start with brief conversation. Don't talk about serious, heavy things and don't act like it's a big thing. Good luck and keep us posted

aidan24326

Make sure you smile!!

lukegriffen

ask her does she have change for the bus. If she says no, then ask her out. After you've received one 'no', the next ones are easier to take

tbh. I wouldn't ask her out straight, try & get to know her a bit better. I don't know how often your bus runs, but no-one will want to vary their schedule just to avoid unwanted suitors.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the advice guys.
I find it hard to talk to woman under normal circumstances, this one I think would be a tad bit extra ordinary. For the past 3 months or so, we've looked at each other countless times, obviously and me being shy as I am, not once has smiled at her, not that I didnt want to. Kinda regreting it at the moment as it wouldnt have been a bit weird talking to her if I did.
I was quite pissed off the other. I was getting on the bus behind her and we both went to the top carriage. The bus was full and only a few places left. There was 2 free spot at the end of the bus. She was heading for it, I hesitated and the bloke behind me went past me and got that seat! Was the first time that happened and I blew it
Other thing is I am getting a company car in a few days time. So that would be the end of me taking the bus. So I have to sorta do it fast if I am to do it. Talk about pressure! Therefore, I wont have much oppurtunity to get to know her unless I can get enough courage to firstly talk to her and secondly get her number. Which as cinnamon pointed out, its kinda freakish if a stranger comes up to talk to me and ask my number, on a bus, going to work!

Marksie

Mr. Shy Guy wrote:

There's this girl who lives near me. We often take the same bus in the morning to work. We get on the same stop and get off the same spot too So not only she lives near me but works near me as well. She seem very nice and I'd like to ask her out. We haven't spoke before and on top of that I am a bit shy. Not sure how to approach her to ask her out.

Any advice on how to break the ice with her and ask her out is greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

How about a simple "good morning", or "after you" before getting on or off the bus?
"will this bus never arrive?"
"crowded isnt it?"
"Thats the last seat.. would you like it"
Simple non-threatening

Judging by the resonse.
then "you get off at my stop...where do you work?"
"By the way my name is xxxxx whats yours."
and so on and so forth

LegacyUser

theyre right u cant go "hi ive noticed u around will u go out with me?" any normal girl would run! just be yourself an start a little conversation, and once the ice is broken you should be able to talk to her easily, if youre still not comfortable then theres no point askin her out if you cant talk, just be yourself! a safe topic is something like the weather gone bad again and the likes. a thing every girl loves is to laugh! if you can make her laugh youll have no bother! maybe even mention to her that you are gettin a car an you wont have to stand out in the weather anymore, and judge her reaction if she likes you she'll be disappointed but try and hide it! but look out for it all the same! good luck!!

Colm_OReilly

I've never known anyone build attraction by talking about the weather!

Shy Guy, the only way through fear or to do courage. But overall, you should work on your confidence: it will work wonders for you in every area of your life.

Advice for this particular scenario: Don't try to be perfect, because that'll just increase the pressure on you to perform, and then you won't.

You're bound to feel anxious but then again so will she, it's normal when you start interacting with someone new. If you have the opportunity to speak to her on the bus (let's say the journey is 30 minutes) you'll have enough time to see if you want to see her again. Then set something up from there.

Hope this helps,
Colm

LegacyUser

i was in the same boat as you, always the same bus for years and years, also kinda knew her from primary school, we bumped into each other in a club recently and hit it off great and and going on a few dates, bite the bullet and ask her, she could be in the same state of mind too <scans PI for similar worded thread with genders reversed>

TomCo

But whatever you do don't leave it too long, someone else could ask her out and then you'll be kicking yourself.

It happened to me it could happen to you.