7th lager 19:50

Aoife-FM104

there is not much to do in dublin without alcohol is there? i've been drinking for 2 - 3 hours, my friends are busy.

what else can i do but drink?

dar83

Pleasure yourself?

Oh and video it for the rest of us that have nothing to do....

(why do topics like this exist? )

Aoife-FM104

i'm single, friends are busy, nothing to do tonight except get drunk.

life in dublin?

or just lonely life?

i'm interesting, different, nice, funny!!!

why is life so unfair?

JackKelly

You need a hobby. I recommend photography, it's the perfect excuse to go wandering on your own.

The Free Man

go to isaac butts tonight, ill cya there. look out for a tall red guy

Aoife-FM104

TimAy wrote:

You need a hobby. I recommend photography, it's the perfect excuse to go wandering on your own.

i like this idea. can you recommend a camera / technique / school / book?

Ruu_Old

Check out the Photography forum under Arts, OP. Theres lots of resources there if you want to get into photography.

Black Swan

OP create a post under Arts/photography to get your question answered by those really into it.

Aoife-FM104

but what about now?

i really miss my friends. i remember listening to a tape - beatles, mercury rev, lots of beautiful music, in a dark room, smoking grass, drinking, 3, 4, 5 am, in their house, happy.

somehow i've lost all this - people moving away etc - and now i'm left with my empty house and no one.

when you lose friends you life really changes.

qwytre

Aoife-FM104 wrote:

but what about now?

i really miss my friends. i remember listening to a tape - beatles, mercury rev, lots of beautiful music, in a dark room, smoking grass, drinking, 3, 4, 5 am, in their house, happy.

somehow i've lost all this - people moving away etc - and now i'm left with my empty house and no one.

when you lose friends you life really changes.

Yep,join the club. I guess you are probably around 27 years old?

It just happens slowly over time without you realising it. I look back now and am not sure at what point it happened, friends move, college friends move etc etc.

Aoife-FM104

qwytre wrote:

Yep,join the club. I guess you are probably around 27 years old?

It just happens slowly over time without you realising it. I look back now and am not sure at what point it happened, friends move, college friends move etc etc.

that's very funny i am 27

is it normal for things to "change" at this age?

i preferred it before. i don't want to "grow up" just because i have to. people shouldn't have to buy houses and move away because they think it's normal.

qwytre

Aoife-FM104 wrote:

that's very funny i am 27

is it normal for things to "change" at this age?

i preferred it before. i don't want to "grow up" just because i have to. people shouldn't have to buy houses and move away because they think it's normal.

I think it happens a lot around that age to people. I mean your college friends have moved on, some of your close friends are probably in serious relationships and it just doesnt happen as much now when big groups of friends just casually do things together like drinking in house parties and the likes.

People start to get different priorities, some of them want a house and therefore are more careful on how much they spend, others what a family and take their relationships very seriously.

For me anyways when I think about my friends they are all in relationships, just dont go out as much as they did, or have moved to another part of the country. And I end up in my house a bit like yourself.

A lot of people tend to rely on their work collegues for friendship, I find that difficult, I wouldnt really make close friends easily (not really interested in having 20 or 30 friends who arent really close friends) and therefore that adds to the problem.

Heyes

Think its a stage in our life that most dont really like.. a lot move on, married, houses etc to some extent, however one thing you can do is keep in touch with your friends, meet up for a few pints during the week, really make an effort to keep in touch with them. you probable wont have the nights you had before but its always important to keep in touch with those close to you.

A lot of my friends are thinking houses, further commitment with boyf etc, so there not really able to go out as much anymore, and im similar age to you (im 26). I really make an effort to keep in touch with them, arrange a few pints, even meet for lunch , natter whatever.. one things i realLy try to do and really enjoy is just meeting new people. I think its important, and something you should really try and do, be it socialising more in work, attending class's of intrest like the lads said about doing photography etc.

You struck me that your not really too happy at the moment, what you need to do is get up go out and have some fun, try not to let it bug you because if you do then you ll get stuck in a rut.

Good luck, and get up and go

Aoife-FM104

i work in computers and can't relate to my work friends. they are clever but so close minded, but they think they're so open (confusing intelligence with open minds), do you know what i mean?

i think a big problem for me is that my friends hav abondanded ireland! yes, it;s the age where they feel they have to make decisions.

i'm just not ready for that yet.

it makes me sad. alcohol is my best frind on nights like this! i will go to a gay bar later, alone, knowing i won't be bothered, but secretly i'll be very sad wishing i had company.

qwytre

Hmm,maybe there is a trend here, I am a systems programmer. Seems IT jobs can only result in people ending up wondering where it all went wrong

Seriously though, if you can go to a bar by yourself (nothing wrong with that) there is a good chance you will start meeting more new people. I would say going and joining a club that interests you is the way to go.

Thinking about it there that last close friend I made was back in college 6 years ago, still a good close friend though but has just left Dublin. Myabe I need to start being a bit more social and start doing the usual social events in work.

Are all your close friends now gone?

gerire

Then why go somewhere no-one will talk to you, go somewhere to meet people. No ofence but feeling sorry for yourself here isn't going to make you feel any better, it will only increase the feeling and alcohol, a deressant, will accelerate this too.

I know how you feel but aside from going out and making an effort to meet new people and talk/laugh etc with them you will continue to feel unhappy.

LOL'd at the "confusing intelligence with open minds" its so true of the guys in computer department I work with too

Heyes

Ah try not to let it get you down, your still young there is absolutaly no pressure for you to be doing what there doing. You say they have all moved on, is there any friends that you may have lost touch with over time that you could maybe catch up and get in touch with them again ?

Giblet

do you want sex?

Aoife-FM104

my close friends have all loft ireland. yeah there are 1 or 2 people who i cab meet tonight, but they are my desperation friends, and they prob see me as the same!

likely i will stay alone tonight, get drunk (am already nearly there!) and write a story about being alone (i write stories about my life...)

i wish there were a badge people wore who feel like me so we wouldn't have to pretend we are so confident and happy with our lives

Heyes

Most people feel like that at some point in there life, however they try not to let it get them down. Dwealing and overthinking about this kinda thing will just get you miserable. There is absolutaly no point in that as it will do absolutaly nothing for you. So dont go writing how you feel on this, just get up and make some changes in your life so things are more positive.

qwytre

When you feel like that you should realise that things are not nearly as bad as you think they are.

A person I knew reasonably well in college (a lovely girl, would be about 28-ish) for some reason decided to end her life yesterday morning. I mean can you imagine what her family is going through and will go through for the rest of their own lives. Any problems I have pale into insignificance compared to that.

Try to be positive, in fact you'll probably meet more nice new people that way.

Aoife-FM104

thanks for the replies

yeah i know my life is ok. good job, good imagination, good open mind, good attitude to the real world.

i just miss being with people who understand me. i'm so tired of being around small minded arrogant fools!!!

i said earlier people confuse intelligence with being open minded, well a lot of people confuse intelligence with ubnderstanding life. i don't say i have all the answers, but i respect being different and having different priorities and opinions is the beauty of life.

i guess i jjst feel alone and misunderstaood.

i know i control my life. but everyone keeps leaving...

it's not from lack of trying...

Heyes

Qwytre Sorry to hear about that, it is always a horrible thing to experience

Aoife tbh your not alone, there is so many of us that feel exactly the same, but we just need to get out there have a laugh, keep in touch with friends. ya know just cause there in a relationship doesnt mean you cant / wont see them, it just takes someone to sort it, i nominate you

Terry

most of my friends have moved away and are in relationships, but they all come back to Leixlip on the sunday of a long weekend and we all go on the piss.
perhaps you could arrange something like that with your friends.

qwytre

Heyes wrote:

Qwytre Sorry to hear about that, it is always a horrible thing to experience

Thanks Heyes.

Well Aoife-FM104, the consensus seems to be that this happens a lot to people and it will change. Just keep trying to make new friends\keep in touch with old ones.

Good luck ,you know it well all work out in the end

Wertz

Rest assured that it doesn't any easier over the coming years.

But enough of the negative vibes, just do yourself a favour and don't try and fill the void with alcohol...that's a long and winding road and it only leads to one place.

i wish there were a badge people wore who feel like me so we wouldn't have to pretend we are so confident and happy with our lives

You should patent that idea, you'd make yourself a lot of money.

So Glad

Aoife-FM104 wrote:

thanks for the replies

yeah i know my life is ok. good job, good imagination, good open mind, good attitude to the real world.

i just miss being with people who understand me. i'm so tired of being around small minded arrogant fools!!!

i said earlier people confuse intelligence with being open minded, well a lot of people confuse intelligence with ubnderstanding life. i don't say i have all the answers, but i respect being different and having different priorities and opinions is the beauty of life.

i guess i jjst feel alone and misunderstaood.

i know i control my life. but everyone keeps leaving...

it's not from lack of trying...

Yeah. I felt like that at an early stage of my life and couldn't see over the horizon and thought it was all bad. Not true of course, you just have to apply yourself.

I understand about friends who are closed minded and sometimes just vain and how hard it is to find people who are really open minded and intellegent. I used to have many friends like that but in a period of a few day I lost them all. It happened so I moved on. Out of all the friends I know I selectively hang arround the intellengent ones because they are the ones most close to you.

theTinker

wrote:

i wish there were a badge people wore who feel like me so we wouldn't have to pretend we are so confident and happy with our lives

i second the patent idea, a type of "looking to make friends badge",or a less desperate note: "Available to get to know badge"

it would certainly help alot of people.

AngryBadger

Aoife-FM104 wrote:

they are my desperation friends, and they prob see me as the same!

wtf? if I wasn't stoned and laughing my nuts off at the venture bros. I'd persue this....but I am, and I am....so i won't

Dave!

Giblet wrote:

do you want sex?

Yes please.

faceman

Aoife-FM104 wrote:

there is not much to do in dublin without alcohol is there? i've been drinking for 2 - 3 hours, my friends are busy.

what else can i do but drink?

you suck, read a book. go for a walk. Pay a member of the eldery community a visit.

fitter, happier more productive....

Fajitas!

TimAy wrote:

You need a hobby. I recommend photography, it's the perfect excuse to go wandering on your own.

Exactly, give it a go like, you can get a second hand film Slr for 30 quid on Ebay. It'll give you something to do and be proud of. Camera clubs and whatnot are great for meeting people too.

theTinker

faceman wrote:

you suck

How is that helpful? who roams a board at night and slags off sum1? what a ****ty ignorant thing to say anyway..

faceman wrote:

Read a book

maybe the OP does read? are they expected to read a book for the next 4 hours? reading is sumthing "most" people do for 30-60mins a day or before they go to sleep. Telling them to read a book when they are finding themselves short of friends is useless.

faceman wrote:

Pay a member of the eldery community a visit.

I'm sure the OP is prolly looking for sumthing a little more entertaining than sponge baths.....

To the OP:
I do believe there is alot more than drinking for fun, although hard to come up with on the spot. I dont drink much myself so i sometimes get the boring nights too. I find there is usually a person I can find to go the cinema or sumthing when my friends are getting pissed. Indoor hobbies are fine if u dont mind doing stuff on ur own for an hour or 2. mine involve building stuff, but alot of females tend to do things more artistic like painting? its a relaxing, rewarding hobby, and im sure u would meet people if u take any classes after a while, best thing about that is they are intersted in sumthing u are interested in and it always imrpesses me when soembody says they do sumthign creative like that.
Theres writing too of course but i dont find that enjoyable. Im not sure about gyms late at night? i dont know if they do be open even but thats another nice way to meet people. Often people have to go the gym on thier own as thier friends aint interested.

I lost a huge chunk of my friends to various different thigns over a short time so i can relate to wat u are saying. it takes a bit of time building back up ur social circle and its very difficult when your friends are not there to introduce u to new people.

faceman

theTinker wrote:

How is that helpful? who roams a board at night and slags off sum1? what a ****ty ignorant thing to say anyway..


maybe the OP does read? are they expected to read a book for the next 4 hours? reading is sumthing "most" people do for 30-60mins a day or before they go to sleep. Telling them to read a book when they are finding themselves short of friends is useless.


I'm sure the OP is prolly looking for sumthing a little more entertaining than sponge baths.....

if this thread is genuine it should be in PI not AH.
My post was helpful, the OP's issue is an inner turmoil struggling to conform with what he/she perceives to be the socially acceptable persona of modern times.

So seeing as you know more than the rest of us, whats wrong with reading a book for 4 hours? And whats wrong with helping those in need in the community. The OP doesnt appear to be looking for help, more like looking for attention imho. As I said if this is for real it should be in PI.

Santa Claus

3 of my best friends have moved away in the past year and a half.
One went to the US, another to the UK and the 3rd to Dubai.
It can be a real pain in the ass finding people to go out with now, but on the plus side at least I'm sorted for somewhere to stay on my holidays !

Why not try a dating site Aoife...You may meet some like minded folks to socialise with ?

Dave!

faceman wrote:

if this thread is genuine it should be in PI not AH.
My post was helpful, the OP's issue is an inner turmoil struggling to conform with what he/she perceives to be the socially acceptable persona of modern times.

So seeing as you know more than the rest of us, whats wrong with reading a book for 4 hours? And whats wrong with helping those in need in the community. The OP doesnt appear to be looking for help, more like looking for attention imho. As I said if this is for real it should be in PI.

lol, thanks for your input Freud

This should probably be moved to PI, she'll get more help there

theTinker

faceman wrote:

the OP's issue is an inner turmoil struggling to conform with what he/she perceives to be the socially acceptable persona of modern times.

This language is clearly hyped up on purpose and completely different than ur usual(i checked), so drop the pretentious(11 letters, see i TRY make myself look important too) ****. Also pointing out the OP's problem from your colorful perspective isnt backing ur post up, Your "My post was helpful" sentence wasnt even in a context!
persona also shouldnt be used in this context. do a quick define search and u will see why.

The inner turmoil i assume u are referring to is that the OP has lost most of thier friends, drinking culture etc,, no issue is a inner tormoil struggling, its like saying the problem has a problem. I under stand how this got messed up though in ur lovely work, trying to make it sound strong must of side tracked you from the meaning of it.

faceman wrote:

So seeing as you know more than the rest of us,

I believe you are the only one seeing that anywhere as i only disgreed with ur posting, gave my opinions and never claimed to know anymore than what i posted. (but im very flattered)

faceman(from last quote) wrote:

rest of us

This pissed me off.
Never have I mentioned anyone else so grouping YOU with US is a cowardly way of defending urself.

faceman wrote:

whats wrong with reading a book for 4 hours?

nothing at all, i read(past tense) alot each day until a few weeks ago(got busy with finals).
Im just going to copy and paste my previous ppost(partially) since you must of glanced over this

theTinker wrote:

Telling them to read a book when they are finding themselves short of friends is useless.

suggesting a book club would be helpful if they are looking for more friends or a hobby(which the OP showed interest in), if they are just looking for attention on a subject its back to being useless, and certainly preceded by "you suck" didnt help it.

faceman wrote:

My post was helpful

I dont believe your comment could possibly be speaking of this:

faceman wrote:

Original Post:
you suck, read a book. go for a walk. Pay a member of the eldery community a visit.

fitter, happier more productive....

Unless the question is "how do i give a blow job?", No helpful answer starts with "you suck"

faceman wrote:

As I said if this is for real it should be in PI.

I'm not a mod so 'ok'
plus i read it the first time in ur first sentence.

to the OP just a quickie:
Sorry i interrupted your post here. i just got a bit pee'ed? off seeing such an assed post. wont happen again.
You mention you were interested in a hobby on the first page, Hillwalking would be a nice one to take up with it being summer and it costs practically nothing to do, An Oige run nice ones for beginners. The people I've met are ALWAYS REALLY friendly and quite quirky( i sort of got that impression from you too). I've posted details of them in outdoor pursuits but u can visit them at www.Anoige.ie, they run sundays so it shoudlnt interfer with work. costs 10€ per trip mostly.

Sizzler

LOL @ "thetinker"....has a handful of posts to their name and they come on here with the expertise of a teenager.....hill walking? PMSL !

stovelid

lol

If the OP had described herself as "fat_hairy_bloke_drinking_alone" instead of 27f, we would probaby on reply 3 by now.

Sizzler wrote:

LOL @ "thetinker"....has a handful of posts to their name and they come on here with the expertise of a teenager.....hill walking? PMSL !

joejoem

faceman wrote:

you suck, read a book. go for a walk. Pay a member of the eldery community a visit.

fitter, happier more productive....

*Round of Applause.


I agree, get up off your arse, go for a run, go to the gym, rent a movie, get a hobby. Getting wasted is another way for you to feel sorry for yourself.

joejoem

faceman wrote:

fitter, happier more productive....

Aghhh now taht radiohead song is stuck in my head!

theTinker

Sizzler wrote:

LOL @ "thetinker"....has a handful of posts to their name and they come on here with the expertise of a teenager.....hill walking? PMSL !

I only recently signed up to Boards.ie, so why does my post count matter? U think experience on forums and life only begins at post 1? LOL

to the other: how is a forum posters sex and age have something to do with a problem i had with another posters(guy or girl, im not sure) post?

too many posts spoil the forum.

Sizzler

theTinker wrote:

I only recently signed up to Boards.ie, so why does my post count matter? U think experience on forums and life only begins at post 1? LOL

to the other: how is a forum posters sex and age have something to do with a problem i had with another posters(guy or girl, im not sure) post?

too many posts spoil the forum.

Number of posts dont matter, its the quality. Ask faceman, you two seemed to be getting along great on earlier posts :-)

Giblet

Sizzler wrote:

LOL @ "thetinker"....has a handful of posts to their name and they come on here with the expertise of a teenager.....hill walking? PMSL !

shut up before i systematically delete all your posts.

joejoem

Giblet wrote:

shut up before i systematically delete all your posts.

Can you do that? What about changing water to wine, can you do that? Ooh Ooh, cure my red hair!

theTinker

Sizzler wrote:

You have no street cred dude.

LOL

street cred on a board, I'll admit i never considered that before posting,lol
i was also told not to wear jeans while hillwalking and to walk alot before trying to walk in front as i would lose 'mountain cred'.
that one sent me into stiches.

all i need now is underwater cred and ill be set for life.
edit: well at least until i need moon cred.

TerrorFirmer

joejoem wrote:

Getting wasted is another way for you to feel sorry for yourself.

If so I can't being to imagine what class of depressing event occured that inspired your 21 day binge as outlined in another thread, I could feel chest pains just reading it

Spastafarian

Sizzler wrote:

You have no street cred dude.

LOL

Well there goes any "street cred" you've ever had.

joejoem

HavoK wrote:

If so I can't being to imagine what class of depressing event occured that inspired your 21 day binge as outlined in another thread, I could feel chest pains just reading it

Ah no, thats happy wasted, with someone else. Picture christmas day when you were 7, that moment you sat infront of all the presents you got where you are so happy you dont know how to express it. That was my feeling for 21 days. high stress job to Piss head without a care in the world..... Fun, fun fun. probably wont do it for as long next time though. A week is enough, a day off somewhere too.

Sizzler

Spastafarian wrote:

Well there goes any "street cred" you've ever had.

???

Spastafarian

Sizzler wrote:

???

Is this why you have so many posts?