What to do when a guy doesn't call??

Siun

Ok - here's the story & if the smart asses could stay out with their smart comments it would be great....
Went on a date last week....met the guy on a night out.. he asked for my number then text to say how about dinner & he picked me up... all going well I thought... we kissed & he commented on how much in common we had... that was almost a week ago.. haven't really heard from him since.. when dropping me off I said I'd buy him dinner next & he said that'd be great... said he couldn't believe what a lovely time we had & he was looking forward to it. He said his work schedule was hectic but we'd work something out. Apart from answering a text or two from me I haven't heard from him. I'm usually pretty clued in to whether a guy will call or not but this one has really confused me. I know what he does & it's hectic but as a male friend of mine said - 'No one is THAT busy!'.. So I guess I just forget him & move on???
Not trying to be smart but I'm not ugly.. no warts or crooked eyes.. I get asked out a fair bit but rarely by anyone I really fancy... apart from this guy of course!! So I just wonder.... what goes on in a mans brain that makes him say all the right things then loose your number!?!

Adam

Personal Issues forum, and for fcuk sake read the shaggin charter!

Sleepy

Just roll with it. See what happens, if someone else asks you out and you fancy taking them up on it, fire away, you've only been on a date with the guy...

Sometimes people are just that busy. Work isn't always the only thing tying someone up, you've just met him so maybe there's things you don't know yet.

On the other hand, maybe he just isn't interested and is too much of a coward to say so. If that's the case, chalk it down as a lucky miss and go find the next frog to kiss on the way to finding your prince...

Oh and BTW this should be in PI: http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=127

Siun

Charming!! Hope u don't kiss your mother with that mouth! Now get back into your cot until you've grown up & got some manners.

tman

Siun wrote:

Ok - here's the story & if the smart asses could stay out with their smart comments it would be great....

i must be veering into smart arse territory now... but how about you just give him a fecking call already?
did YOU enjoy yourself?
if so why not take the initiative and get on to him, if he's not interested at least you can move on (i'm free on monday btw)

Siun

Tks Sleepy - I'm relatively new here... how do I move it to PI?

D

Maybe you could call him?

Siun

tman wrote:

i must be veering into smart arse territory now... but how about you just give him a fecking call already?
did YOU enjoy yourself?
if so why not take the initiative and get on to him, if he's not interested at least you can move on (i'm free on monday btw)

I don't want to call him because I'm afraid he'll be too busy to talk or it'll be awkward... last thing anyone needs is someone running after them & it's really not my style.....best bet is just to forget about it I guess... oh tks for the free on monday comment..

Ruu_Old

Settle down OP, theres been a large amount of people posting in the wrong forums which is being discussed at the moment, it is getting very tiresome for a lot of people. Its not really an AH subject to be honest.
Regarding your post, maybe the guy had a change of heart and didn't want to get into a relationship. Don't go hanging around for him either and waiting. Best of luck anyway.

Adam

You don't move it to PI, you just create work for the moderators of this forum who have to allow for your ignorance in not reading the charter and do it for you. And 28 you may be, but at least I've learned to respect rules in my few short years.

Age != intelligence

Zulu

Go on a diet? ...aww I'm only kidding; this is in After Hours after all, right?

I'd say - if you really like him, call him. You've nothing to loose.
If you're afraid to loose face, let it slide, and be happy in the knowledge that if he REALLY liked you, he would have found the time/effort to ring you. ...but that's the road to bitterness.

Dizzyblabla

well, you did say you'd bring him out to dinner? maybe he's waiting for the invite, posting in PI about how he met this lovely girl and he's not sure how interested she is?

Ruu_Old

Siun wrote:

Tks Sleepy - I'm relatively new here... how do I move it to PI?

Click the report post button (mention that you want it moved to Personal Issues) in the panel where your username is (icon with exclamation mark) and just remember when posting again.

Miguel_Sanchez

Siun wrote:

Charming!! Hope u don't kiss your mother with that mouth! Now get back into your cot until you've grown up & got some manners.

If you take offense so easy then Boards.ie mightn't be to your liking.

Onwards to your problem - call him. What's to be lost if you do?

You could say something like - 'hey I've got two tickets for [insert concert/show/whatever here] and my friend who was going with couldn't make it. I thought maybe you might like to join me.'

Or just say "Hey, how about that dinner I owe you? Are you free anytime over the next week?"

Dragan

fade_to_grey wrote:

You don't move it to PI, you just create work for the moderators of this forum who have to allow for your ignorance in not reading the charter and do it for you. And 28 you may be, but at least I've learned to respect rules in my few short years.

Age != intelligence

Indeed, work for the MODS, and they are the ones who should be saying this to her dude, not you. Your not a Mod, your just another member.

I normally enjoy reading your posts, and your normally strike me as being sound and pretty level headed, so i will put this one down to a bad day.

Either way dude, chill, let the Mods do there job, no need to do it for them.

Adam

*heavy sigh*

You're right, bad-day-itis right here! I'm all riled up and it annoyed me more because there's a thread discussing just this issue as we speak.

@ Siun

My apologies, I'll use more tact in future. To be honest I'm still reading the thread and I'm with those that suggest you call him, after all you offered him dinner, if it were my I know I'd be waiting for a call.

Anyway sorry again, and good luck!

AngryBadger

Siun wrote:

Ok - here's the story & if the smart asses could stay out with their smart comments it would be great....
Went on a date last week....met the guy on a night out.. he asked for my number then text to say how about dinner & he picked me up... all going well I thought... we kissed & he commented on how much in common we had... that was almost a week ago..

And you're freaking out because.....it's only been a week, either he's interested but hasn't got around to calling you, or he's not interested, in which case move on. So you can either be an adult and make the first move by suggesting a night or venue or something, maybe reminding him that you owe him dinner, or you can continue to wait and silently villify all men out of childish ignorance.

your call

Siun

@ Fade to Grey - Apology accepted & thank u for it...

@ Angrybadger - I don't villify all men! I've met some great ones.. just a little disappointed that this guy hasn't called... I'll hold out till tomorrow then call him... at least then I'll know... it's not the end of the world but my point was that HE was so enthusiastic & to be honest it was one of the best dates I was ever on... loads of conversation & laughing..... anyway I'll call tomorrow if I can get up the nerve .. then I'll know either way...

Nevyn

Why don't you like try something really radical ?
Like oh I don't know
CALLING HIM YOURSELF ?

when dropping me off I said I'd buy him dinner next & he said that'd be great.

You proposed the next date what it would be and offered to foot the bill,
could it be that he tought you were selfconfident and liberated enough to also manage to dial his number and sort out when ?

If could be that as you offered to pay he is living it on you time scale as not to suggest a time that you would not be able to manage.

If you want to know what is up and you want to see him again and you want to go on the dinner date you suggest then then you ring him.


If you were so interesting him him why haven't you rang ?
Aint rocket science.

He could be up to his eye balls with his own life stuff.

AngryBadger

Siun wrote:

@ Angrybadger - I don't villify all men! I've met some great ones.. just a little disappointed that this guy hasn't called... I'll hold out till tomorrow then call him...

Fair enough, maybe I'm being a little harsh. That said, I don't understand why you can't, or haven't considered up until now just texting/ringing him and suggesting a time/place for the next meeting. Then the mystery is resolved.

Siun

Ok - I've rang him now after everyone saying I should & it rang out... I left a message to say I'd like buy him dinner this week & to give me a call.... nothing else I can do..... I'll know either way by the end of the night.... I'd forgotten how much hard work this whole dating this is! Tks for all the advice... I feel better that at least I've put my cards on the table...

Fanny Cradock

What to do when a guy doesn't call??

Well, you can either ask a bunch of faceless strangers what they think, or you could take the radical action of calling him. Just because he's the guy, it doesn’t mean that he is obliged to phone you first.

Ok, harsh post over - I hope it works out for you, Siun.


:::edit:::
just saw your post

Well done Siun! By doing this you can at least get an answer. Hope it's the one you want.

cinnamon

Siun wrote:

Ok - I've rang him now after everyone saying I should & it rang out... I left a message to say I'd like buy him dinner this week & to give me a call.... nothing else I can do..... I'll know either way by the end of the night.... I'd forgotten how much hard work this whole dating this is! Tks for all the advice... I feel better that at least I've put my cards on the table...

Hi Siun, let us know how you get on. I hope it works out for you

Hobbes

Lets hope his wife doesn't pick up.

jesus_thats_gre

fade_to_grey wrote:

You don't move it to PI, you just create work for the moderators of this forum who have to allow for your ignorance in not reading the charter and do it for you. And 28 you may be, but at least I've learned to respect rules in my few short years.

Age != intelligence

Oh cop the **** on will you and get over it.. Its only a poxy forum.

Toolbag

Hobbes wrote:

Lets hope his wife doesn't pick up.

It's like you read my mind

jesus_thats_gre

fade_to_grey wrote:

*heavy sigh*

You're right, bad-day-itis right here! I'm all riled up and it annoyed me more because there's a thread discussing just this issue as we speak.

@ Siun

My apologies, I'll use more tact in future. To be honest I'm still reading the thread and I'm with those that suggest you call him, after all you offered him dinner, if it were my I know I'd be waiting for a call.

Anyway sorry again, and good luck!

Woops

Siun

cinnamon wrote:

Hi Siun, let us know how you get on. I hope it works out for you

Time will tell I'll let you know.....

ace101

Being a bloke I would of ssumed ypu were organising the next date after offering to buy dinner. Worse comes to worse, ring him thursday on a private no. and gauge it from there.

When you say kiss do you mean peck on the cheek or did you give him a tonsillectimy, if so he might think your a bit forward

EOA_Mushy

EDIT: Comment retracted and good luck.

WhiteWashMan

Siun wrote:

I don't want to call him because I'm afraid he'll be too busy to talk or it'll be awkward... last thing anyone needs is someone running after them & it's really not my style.....best bet is just to forget about it I guess... oh tks for the free on monday comment..

fúcking phone him

you want to know something from someone, bloody ask them.

WhiteWashMan

hobbes, youre a bad man.
i like it.