Things to do to your roommate.

MidnightQueen

Some ones i found on google. Any body got any ideas for a flatmate?

1. Make brown-bag lunches for your roommate every morning. Give them
to him/her before they go to class.

2. Every time you enter the room, sit in a chair, lean back too far,

and fall over backwards. Laugh hysterically for about ten minutes.
Then, one day, repeat the falling over exercise, but instead of
laughing, get up, look at the chair sternly, and say "It's not
funny
anymore."

3. Read with a flashlight when the lights are on. Pretend to read
without one when the lights are out, remarking every so often how
great the book is.


4. Get a surfboard. Put it on your bed. Stand on it, and pretend
to surf for about fifteen minutes. Then pretend to "wipe out" and
fall off the bed unto the floor. Pretend you are drowning until
your roommmate comes over to "rescue" you.

5. Keep a hamster as a pet. Buy a blender, and make milkshakes
everyday. Then, one day, get rid of the hamster. Make a shake
using a lot of ketchup. When your roommate comes in, look at the
shake, look at the empty cage and tell your roommate "I was curious."


6. Make toast for breakfast every morning but don't plug the toaster
in. Eat the plain bread, looking at the toaster angrily and
complain that the toaster doesn't know what it's doing. If your
roommate suggests plugging it in, go on a tangent about fire-safety
hazards.

7. Pack up all of your things and tell your roommate that you're
going away to "find yourself." Leave, and come back in about ten
minutes. If your roommate asks, explain that you're not a hard
person to find.

8. Never speak to your roommate directly. If you need to ask or
tell them something, go to another room and call them on the
phone.

9. Every time the phone rings, turn on the stereo at full volume
and begin to violently slam dance with your roommate. If they ask
about it, say "Oh, that damn hypnotist..."


10. Hang a picture of your roommate on the wall. Throw darts at it.
Smile at your roommate often, saying things like, "How nice to see
you again."

11. Get a can of beans and label them "jumping beans." Eat them and
then jump around the room. Get another can of beans and label
them "dancing beans." Eat them and dance around the room. Get
another can of beans and label them "kill your roommate beans."
Eat them, smiling at your roommate.

12. Every time your roommate falls asleep, wait about ten minutes
and then wake them up, saying "It's time to go to bed now."

13. Put up traffic signs around the room. If your roommate
doesn't obey them, give them the tickets. Confiscate something
your roommate owns until they pay the fines.

14. Complain that your elbows, knees, and other joints have been
bothering you. Get a screwdriver and pretend to "fix" them.

15. Paint abstract paintings and title them things like,
"Roommate20 Dying in a Car Crash" and "Roommate Getting Whacked in the Head
with a Shovel." Comment often about how much you love the
paintings.

16. Wear glasses and complain you can never see anything. Bump into
walls and doors. Put your clothes on backwards. Say, "who's
that?" every time your roommate enters the room. When you're not
wearing the glasses act like you can see fine.

17. Whenever someone knocks, answer the phone. Do the opposite aswell.

18. Keep empty jars on the shelf. Tell your roommate that this is
your collection of "inert gases." Look at them often. One day,
act surprised and angered and accuse your roommate of having
released one of the gases. Cover your nose and mouth and run out
of the room.

19. Whenever they are about to fall asleep, ask questions that start
with "Didja ever wonder why..." be creative.

20. Listen to radio static... sing along.

21. Put your mattress underneath your bed. Sleep down there and
pile your dirty clothes on the empty bedframe. If your roommate comments, mutter "Gotta save space," twenty times while twitching violently.

Miss Fluff

ROFL
Particularly like :
16. Wear glasses and complain you can never see anything.......Say, "who's
that?" every time your roommate enters the room.

jobonar

Best one:
5. Keep a hamster as a pet. Buy a blender, and make milkshakes
everyday. Then, one day, get rid of the hamster. Make a shake
using a lot of ketchup. When your roommate comes in, look at the
shake, look at the empty cage and tell your roommate "I was curious."

gerTheGreat

have to say 5 is funny:D

boy_wonder

Fill all the cups in the cupboard with water. Works every time!!! If you really wanna be nasty..take the water from a boiling kettle(never got that bad for me)

Ruu_Old

A few funnies in there A friend of mine told me in college dorms they used to put coffee granules in the shower head!:eek:

Oral Slang

10) Collect Potatoes. Paint faces on them & give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the rest. Wait a few days & then bake your roommate's potato & eat it. Explain to your roommate "he just didn't belong".

09) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs & look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern

08) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it & say "The hair, it's growing. Growing!"

07) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate & mutter, "Soon, soon..."

06) Collect hundreds of pens & pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

05) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you". Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say "Oh yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

04) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head & moan.

03) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it & then say "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?". Complain loudly that you are hungry.

02) Everytime your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can & dance around the room for 5 minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch & saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

01) Talk to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor & kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer!"

fuzzywiggle

01) Talk to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor & kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer!"

rofl

emeraldstar

or if ya dont like them, you could just clean the toilet with their toothbrush??

MidnightQueen

boy_wonder wrote:

Fill all the cups in the cupboard with water. Works every time!!! If you really wanna be nasty..take the water from a boiling kettle(never got that bad for me)

Haha thats a good one alrite! Think i sould have posted this in the humour forum!
Any body got any for flatmates though? Instead of people u share a room with.

MidnightQueen

How about this one?

Say the opposite of everything u mean to say. Example

"Good night" instead of "Good morning"

Oral Slang

http://www.comedycorner.org/50.html

or just google "freak out your roommate". Tons of stuff comes up!

frobisher

I've always rekoned that sleeping with your room mate is pretty much as bad an idea as you can think of! One I learnt about the hard way!

r3nu4l

Oral Slang wrote:

http://www.comedycorner.org/50.html

Pile dirty dishes in your roommate's bed. Insist that you don't know how they got there

I've done this one! Also, running toothpaste down the centre of a roommates bed sheets can be fun.

I have also taken small cacti out of their pots, shaken the soil off and put them in the bottom of the same roommates bed

Hiding half-eaten burgers in their room is good too or stuffing raw minced beef under their sheets

Had to be done, it was revenge for earlier attacks such as asking me if I wanted breakfast in bed ridiculously early one Saturday and then pouring cornflakes and milk on top of me when I went back to sleep :eek:

Student days, great days, long past...

LikeOhMyGawd!

w@nk into their shampoo bottle

---

or

---

put milk powder under their bed sheet

rain on

i generally find that living with her is punishment enough.

mysterious

Better still. When putting clothes on the line get a marker and write their names on each of thier items so no one will get mixed up. especially the underwaer since they can get juggled up together when taken off the line. Then fold items with the given name and line them beside the other sorted clothes. It would really impress your fellow housemates with your organisational skills

pbsuxok1znja4r

r3nu4l wrote:

I have also taken small cacti out of their pots, shaken the soil off and put them in the bottom of the same roommates bed

Jesus man, those cacti thorns can stay stuck in people's skin for years on end. Too far...

stovelid

My mate lived with a guy that used to use his stuff all the time inlcuding his shampoo. He filled the shampoo bottle with oil from his airbrush compresser and left it in the shower.

LikeOhMyGawd! wrote:

w@nk into their shampoo bottlet

Piste

Haha these are great, I should try some of them on my sister

Winters

Give them a facial in the middle of the night.

Kinetic^

Put immac in their brylceem tub

public_enemy

Winters wrote:

Give them a facial in the middle of the night.

come live with me.

Winters

public_enemy wrote:

come live with me.

Oh you..

*flutters eyes*

BMH

Winters wrote:

Give them a facial in the middle of the night.

I think that might be illegal

Dec McC

The night before my roomate started his new job he made his sandwiches. I rang his mobile which was left in another room and when he left to answer it i slipped a teabag between his ham and lettuce. He found out when he bit into it during his lunch break with his new boss.

Winters

BMH wrote:

I think that might be illegal

Not if they have a sence of humour.

It's not like your raping them. However, if they see the funny side in either they are both worth a go.

gizmo

Winters wrote:

Not if they have a sence of humour.

It's not like your raping them. However, if they see the funny side in either they are both worth a go.

What a charmer.

Winters

Well, at least you saw the funny side of it the next morning.

My god you were a heavy sleeper though ^_^

Tar.Aldarion

From his name, your essence must be toxic.

gizmo

:eek:

Ah well, on the upside at least my skin is silky smooth...:)

BMH

Winters wrote:

Well, at least you saw the funny side of it the next morning.

My god you were a heavy sleeper though ^_^

I hope you mean the make-up meaning of facial...

Winters

So do all the roomates I have had.