If you could....

Zombienosh

If you could be any garden tool what would you be?


I'd be a wheelbarrow

Hail 2 Da Chimp

I'd be a Hoe...

Someone had to say it!

Lust4Life

And WHY would you be a Wheelbarrow?

I think that I would be a hedge clippers. I can be around fresh cut flowers and help to artfully shape shrubberies and prune away grape vines that tower from the rain.

And... I'd get a place of honor in the shed because I'm sharp, I tell ya! Keep me away from untrained hands! And oil me so I keep my point!!!!

Ooh! Am I feeling creative tonight! Hee hee!

L4L

Lust4Life

LOL! Chimp!
Are you a DIRTY hoe???? Hee hee!

L4L

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Indeed i am...

Lust4Life

Hee hee! Need some oil???

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Lust4Life wrote:

Hee hee! Need some oil???

Hoes need oil?
well ok then... you're the clippers

Lust4Life

Well, no one need ask WHY you want to be a hoe!
Still wondering why the OP wants to be a wheelbarow, though. To carry a load of hoes????

Oh! my whit is sharp! I AM a hedge clipper after all! Hee hee!

L4L

Zombienosh

carry hoes hmmmmm

Tar.Aldarion

hoe cleaner or a rake

Tar.Aldarion

I wrote a poem for this thread.

Roses are red, violets are blue,

I'll **** you with a rake.

Hail 2 Da Chimp

Tar.Aldarion wrote:

hoe cleaner or a rake

Are you saying im a dirty hoe??? :eek:

Lust4Life

Chimp, if you're dirty that means you're either after a workout or in constant use!!!!!!! You happy little Hoe you!

L4L

Rhyme

Tar.Aldarion wrote:

Roses are red, violets are blue,

I'll **** you with a rake.

How romantic... and familiar.

Garden dibble for me thanks.

Tar.Aldarion

Rhyme wrote:

How romantic... and familiar.

Yes, it's certainly original...yes
>_>
<_<

tSubh Dearg

I'd be a spade. I'm very good a digging holes for myself.

Sparky

Id be a glove..........................

boneless

A bucket!!

Matt Holck

I suppose my flesh might be good for fertilizer
maybe have the dogs process it first
and you could build a rake from my ribs
leave my head in the tomato patch and I'll eat crickets and snails

Sarky

Is there a garden implement that represents my dismay at sickening attempts at flirting and improper use of punctuation?

Matt Holck

sorry
next time Ill drop the apostrophy

perhaps a jethrol tull
thats good for dropping things

Blush_01

Sarky, studies have shown that in the modern garden a hammer (or a mallet, depending on the size of your garden) is an essential*.

Will that do?

















* Is as true as Santa. Honest.

boneless

Or a net for cleaning out the pond... that'd be nice.


I have loads of spadgies having baths in my pond at the moment... I'm gonna miss my pond when I leave here

Lust4Life

Aw, Sarky, what are ya being a Garden Gnome? Scaring away anything you find offensive in the garden?

Black Swan

Hammock (if the gardener is cute).:p

Sarky

Lust4Life wrote:

Aw, Sarky, what are ya being a Garden Gnome? Scaring away anything you find offensive in the garden?

/me concentrates very very VERY hard on Lust4Life's head

Rhyme

OMFGSCANNERS!!!one!

Now, where did i put that gif?

Matt Holck

let it ripon and it will crack on its own

Lust4Life

This IS the CooCoo's nest after all! And I am a hedge clippers!

Black Swan

Definitely a hammock, but it's now reserved for one particular gardener.

county

Black Swan

County just threw a wrench in our thread!

Lust4Life

Hee hee! Blue_Lagoon! Too funny!
So.... who's the particular gardener if I may ask??????
Nobody here but us weeds and flowers. Do tell!

L4L

Blush_01

I sometimes wonder if TCN would be more appropriately named if it was The Tool Shed/Box because there appear to be a few spanners in here.

Black Swan

Lust4Life wrote:

Hee hee! Blue_Lagoon! Too funny!
So.... who's the particular gardener if I may ask??????
Nobody here but us weeds and flowers. Do tell!

L4L

Hi Lust4Life! The gardener is too close for comfort, hiding in a nearby bush and watching us.;)

Lust4Life

Aw, Blue_Lagoon, that's sweet!
Hope he comes out of the bushes and into your heart!

L4L

Sarky

Jesus. Any more sickening and I might vomit up a vital organ.

Demetrius

Sarky is a cynic.:p

Me? I'd be rake.

Black Swan

Rake what?

Demetrius

My fingers through....:p

Matt Holck

I figured

oh well
goodnight

Lust4Life

The hedge clippers wonders, Sarky, you pop in, burn and disappear.
You are yet to name your tool of choice.
Are you maybe a roto tiller cultivating sarchasm?????
It's all good fun here in the garden.

L4L

Black Swan

Demetrius wrote:

My fingers through....:p

Oh, I thought you were referring to the other part of the rake.:p

Diarmiud

What part, prey tell? It is a select tool, made for a given purpose and no else.

Black Swan

Hmmmmm? Not for putt her ing around?:p

Diarmiud

One would think you were speaking of golf-clubs, Blue Lagoon.

(What is a hole in one worth these days?)

Black Swan

Depends if you score.

Diarmiud

Or how good your hand-icap is.

Black Swan

Diarmiud wrote:

What part, prey tell? It is a select tool, made for a given purpose and no else.

Somebody better come up with some dark, rich Swiss chocolate soon, or the predator with become the prey.:p

pantar_dubh

The predator in the garden. Growl!

Demetrius

There is a scratching post way yonder points