Kerryman jokes?

Vulpiner

What do you call a Kerryman under a wheelbarrow?

A mechanic.

Black Swan

What do you call a Kerryman doing pushups?

Sarky

Health-conscious.

biko

A tailor's iron is called a 'goose'.
A Kerry tailor wanted to buy two new irons, so he wrote away to the manufacturers as follows:
Dear Sir,
Please send me two gooses..........
After reading the letter he decided that this wouldn't do, so he changed it to Dear Sir, Please send me two geese............
However, he again felt that there was something wrong and that the manufacturers would be laughing at him. Finally he hit upon the following:
Dear Sir, Please send me a goose.........
P.S. While you're at it, you may as well send me a second one.

Gaillimhtaibhse

The sky had become dark with rain filled clouds. A Kerryman was sitting out sipping his iced tea. The rain burst forth. What did the Kerryman fail to do?

aidan_walsh

netwhizkid, lol.

Demetrius

Gaillimhtaibhse wrote:

The sky had become dark with rain filled clouds. A Kerryman was sitting out sipping his iced tea. The rain burst forth. What did the Kerryman fail to do?

To check himself into a pyschiatric ward for drinking iced tea in the rain.

Black Swan

There was a Kerryman
Who hid in native land
And hiked the many trails
Enduring several gales

Along the coast they came
To blow his brownish mane
While watch he did for ships
That dashed among the tips

Of rocks along the coast
That were an evil host
To ships of bounty main
And those on board with pain

Their treasure cast to sea
Afloat upon was me
To shore I came that day
On crystal sand I lay

For Kerryman to find
And show his hand as kind
To girl I be in youth
With years to seek the truth

Of darkness be this lad
From early life that's sad
I cast my eyes within
And found a soul to win

At first he felt his glee
By saving me from sea
But then he turned away
To leave a life of play

Why would he need to go
Before his heart I sow
A seed to give him sight
And hand to share his might?

the clansman

the lord mayor of kerry came to the lord mayor of cork with a complaint.
he said we were laughing at his people too much
he demanded lord mayor of cork do something stupid to let them have a laugh

the cork fella being a nice guy understood
he ordered the cork council to build a bridge in the desert

the kerry men thought it was funny and had a great laugh
the kerry lord moyor came back to cork and said they could take it down as they had theyre fun

lord mayor of cork said : well sir i had tryed but all the kerry men were haveing such a great time fishing off it we couldnt

Tori

Two Kerrymen in a helicopter - one turns to the other and says, "Hey Sean, what would happen if we turned the helicopter upside down, would we fall out?" Sean says, "Not at all Mick, sure we'll always be friends."

Tori

Two Kerrymen in a car on their way to Galway come to a roadsign saying 'Galway left'.......... so they went back home.

homah_7ft

Why did the Kerryman rob a bank?

Demetrius

To pay Homah 7ft to live permanently in the Cuckoo's Nest (it seems that way:) )

Sofaspud

homah_7ft wrote:

Why did the Kerryman rob a bank?

To feed his drug habit.

bluto63

Two Kerryman were walking down the road and one of them finds a mirror. He looks at it and goes "Look at this. I swear I've seen this face before" the other one takes it, looks at it and hands it back then says "It's me you fool!"

Whats the latest Kerryman invention? A solar powered tanning bed