Films that would be improved by the presence of Rambo

omahaid

As we all know, there are some parts of every film that can be made infinitely better by the presence of Rambo from Rambo II or III only (e.g.

At the end of "The Last Castle" when Robert Redford was putting up the flag, the presence of Rambo would have enhanced that scene no end!!

). Any suggestions?

sixpack's little hat

Jarhead could definitely have done with a serving of Rambo!

Karl Hungus

This has to be the most ridiculous thread yet. Everyone knows that Carl Weathers' prescence improves films 11% more than Rambo does.

omahaid

Yes agree, Jarhead. No to ridiculous! No way, Rambo would have made so many films better, e.g. Shawshank Redemption, Blade Runner and The De Vinci Code. Straight away, films doubled in betterness by Rambo popping up and killing everyone whilst being bullet proof!!!!

seedot

I recently watched Conquest of the Planet of the Apes and was struck throughout the film by how much Rambo's presence would have enhanced the narrative and picked up the slower elements of the film. While his imperviousness to bullets would have been an addition to later scenes I think it is in the earlier underground revolutionary movement of the apes that the film really lacked a Rambo character.

So yes, I think most films could be improved by Rambo. As for current affairs programming....

Necronomicon

Rambo? Nah....but add Lo Pan or Ash to any film, then you'd have some show!

I can just see it now: Freddy vs Jason II: Freddy vs Jason vs Ash vs Lo Pan.....

That'd be unreal!!

Karl Hungus

Necromomicon wrote:

Rambo? Nah....but add Lo Pan or Ash to any film, then you'd have some show!

I can just see it now: Freddy vs Jason II: Freddy vs Jason vs Ash vs Lo Pan.....

That'd be unreal!!

Not as unreal as Lo Pan vs Lo Pan. Now that'd be a ****in' movie!

omahaid

Ash would make a welcome addition yes, but Rambo is a neccessary part in any film. Better question, find me a film that would not be improved by the presence of Rambo!!!!!

Pigman II

I think 'Without A Paddle' could have been improved with the presence of Rambo.

Brokeback Mountain could have done with Carl Weathers in it.

Karl Hungus

omahaid wrote:

Better question, find me a film that would not be improved by the presence of Rambo!!!!!

I don't think it's a case of a film not being improved by Rambo, it's that there so many others that would improve a film more than Rambo.

monkeyfudge

seedot wrote:

I recently watched Conquest of the Planet of the Apes and was struck throughout the film by how much Rambo's presence would have enhanced the narrative and picked up the slower elements of the film. While his imperviousness to bullets would have been an addition to later scenes I think it is in the earlier underground revolutionary movement of the apes that the film really lacked a Rambo character.

So yes, I think most films could be improved by Rambo. As for current affairs programming....

But that film had Khan in it. KHAN! KHANNNNNNNNN!!!!!!

Pigman II

omahaid wrote:

find me a film that would not be improved by the presence of Rambo!!!!!

Taxi Driver.

Karl Hungus

monkeyfudge wrote:

But that film had Khan in it. KHAN! KHANNNNNNNNN!!!!!!

Now that's what every film would need! A KHAAAN scene.

omahaid

Karl Hungus wrote:

I don't think it's a case of a film not being improved by Rambo, it's that there so many others that would improve a film more than Rambo.

What!!! Films improved by less Rambo, I dunno how that works, very confused now, so many films that I can imagine rocking hard with Rambo in it, don't get me started!!

Karl Hungus

omahaid wrote:

What!!! Films improved by less Rambo

What? That's not what I said!

I said that others (For example, Lo Pan, Khan, or Ash) would improve a film more than Rambo.

omahaid

Karl Hungus wrote:

What? That's not what I said!

I said that others (For example, Lo Pan, Khan, or Ash) would improve a film more than Rambo.

Yes, my apologies, misinterpreted that, but the point still stands, no one else can improve films more than Rambo! And I offer nothing in the way of proof other than the fact it would kick ass. And Taxi Driver could have done with at least one Rambo scene.

Silverfish

I noticed Rambo did not appear in This.

This would heavily imply to me that he is not the best person to improve a film.

Karl Hungus

omahaid wrote:

no one else can improve films more than Rambo!

Ash certainly can. So can Lo Pan.

omahaid

Yes, while the presence of Optimus Prime might lend to the idea that it was the "Ultimate" show down, I'm not sure how Lincoln is more ultimate than Rambo. Either way, it still doesn't detract from my point.... No film cannot be improved by Rambo (and Optimus Prime)

Karl Hungus

Silverfish wrote:

I noticed Rambo did not appear in This.

This would heavily imply to me that he is not the best person to improve a film.

That animation did not include Khan, Ash, or even Oh Dae-Su:



This would heavily imply to me that the animation isn't up to scratch at all.

Although good to see Lo Pan in it.

omahaid

Karl Hungus wrote:

Ash certainly can. So can Lo Pan.

Still cant convince me for Ash, don't get me wrong, a silver medal to Rambo's Gold! But Rambo doesnt need any chainsaw for an arm, he can kill a foreign armyman and steal his chainsaw! And as for Lo Pan...Rambo is invincible!!

ChityWest

omahaid wrote:

As we all know, there are some parts of every film that can be made infinitely better by the presence of Rambo from Rambo II or III . . . Any suggestions?

Les Amants du Pont-Neuf, three colours blue/red/white, remains of the day, ANY woody allen film & clerks 2. Probably and E.T./bambi as well.

Karl Hungus

omahaid wrote:

Still cant convince me for Ash, don't get me wrong, a silver medal to Rambo's Gold! But Rambo doesnt need any chainsaw for an arm, he can kill a foreign armyman and steal his chainsaw! And as for Lo Pan...Rambo is invincible!!

I'm sorry, but Ash is far superior to Rambo. Better films, better one-liners, better actor, more gore, and a bigger chin.

omahaid

ChityWest wrote:

Les Amants du Pont-Neuf, three colours blue/red/white, remains of the day, ANY woody allen film & clerks 2. Probably and E.T./bambi as well.

No, I disagree, each one of those films can be improved by Rambo (and/or Optimus Prime) being in some scene in those films.

bettlebrox

omahaid wrote:

As we all know, there are some parts of every film that can be made infinitely better by the presence of Rambo from Rambo II or III only

Here are my suggestion
Watership Down When the bad evil rabbits attack!

omahaid

Teasle: Whatever possessed God in heaven to make a man like Rambo?
Trautman: God didn't make Rambo. I made him!

Teasle: Are you telling me that 200 of our men against your boy is a no-win situation for us?
Trautman: You send that many, don't forget one thing.
Teasle: What?
Trautman: A good supply of body bags.

Orval: "Let's do some huntin'!
Preston: Hunting? We ain't huntin' him, he's huntin' us!

Murdock: Rambo, this is Murdock, we're glad you're alive. Where the hell are you? Give us your position and we'll come to pick you up!
Rambo: Murdock... I'm coming to get you!

I could go on, no contest. Runner up is Optimus Prime, just too less threatening (hope the new movie next year changes that)

omahaid

bettlebrox wrote:

Here are my suggestion
Watership Down When the bad evil rabbits attack!

Yes, I can certainly see how Rambo would have improved it Feckin teachers wouldn't have showed that to us if Rambo popped up and gunned down every one of those evil rabbits (or people, all good to me)

ChityWest

omahaid wrote:

, each one of those films can be improved by Rambo .

Yep - thats what I said ! Also the sound of music /wizard of oz / Skippy the bush kangaroo movie (if there was one) and march of the pengiuns.

Karl Hungus

omahaid wrote:

Teasle: Whatever possessed God in heaven to make a man like Rambo?
Trautman: God didn't make Rambo. I made him!

Teasle: Are you telling me that 200 of our men against your boy is a no-win situation for us?
Trautman: You send that many, don't forget one thing.
Teasle: What?
Trautman: A good supply of body bags.

Orval: "Let's do some huntin'!
Preston: Hunting? We ain't huntin' him, he's huntin' us!

Murdock: Rambo, this is Murdock, we're glad you're alive. Where the hell are you? Give us your position and we'll come to pick you up!
Rambo: Murdock... I'm coming to get you!

I could go on, no contest. Runner up is Optimus Prime, just too less threating (hope the new movie next year changes that)

Only one of those lines is said by Rambo himself, and it's weak. Ash has many legendary lines, that are far superior to any of those.

You're right though, no contest.

Hugh Hefner

Donnie Darko. Replace Frank The Rabbit with Rambo.

omahaid

I suppose thats then end of this thread then... Every film can be improved in someplace somehow by Rambo. Fair enough, night all

Karl Hungus

Nobody can improve a film as much as Frank Booth though, he'd even freak Lo Pan out.

TerrorFirmer

If he was in Flight 93 it might have a happy ending.

ChityWest

Reckon Frank booth would last about 2 seconds in Devils Rejects or Saving private ryan

the_syco

Lemme see... I think if Rambo starred in SWAT or Alexander instead of Colm Farrell, they'd have been better.

Karl Hungus

ChityWest wrote:

Reckon Frank booth would last about 2 seconds in Devils Rejects or Saving private ryan

I'd say he'd dominate The Devil's Rejects tbh. Saving Private Ryan? Hmm, he'd make a far better captain that Tom Hanks. He'd find Ryan, and then beat the living snot out of him for being such a little jerk.

Titanic, obviously.

Pugsley

the_syco wrote:

Lemme see... I think if Rambo starred in SWAT or Alexander instead of Colm Farrell, they'd have been better.

If a rabbit would have starred in SWAT or Alexander rather than Colin Farrell it would have been improved (especially the monty python rabbit), not due to any acting talent of the bunny, just the general removal of Colin Farrell. However, Ash in Alexander, now theres a movie Id want to see.

stevejazzx

Lorenzos oil could of done with a bout of ramboesque shinanigans tbh, silly thread, just silly

kittenkiller

HavoK wrote:

If he was in Flight 93 it might have a happy ending.

The world'd be a different place indeed!

I think March Of The Penguins could've done with Rambo-ing up a bit.
[Morgan Freeman]Alas none of them survived!!![/Morgan Freeman]

And Lord Of The Flies, all dem wussy-fellas'd be raosting over the fire by the second day!!!

Hugh Hefner

I don't know what people mean by "Ash" but I assume we're talking about the one and only Ash Ketchum? Go Pokeball!

Pugsley

kittenkiller wrote:

I think March Of The Penguins could've done with Rambo-ing up a bit.
[Morgan Freeman]Alas none of them survived!!![/Morgan Freeman]

Id pay large sums of money to see that

I don't know what people mean by "Ash" but I assume we're talking about the one and only Ash Ketchum? Go Pokeball!

Bruce Campbell's charecter in the Evil Dead trilogy, link:
http://www.imdb.com/find?s=all&q=evil+dead

Hugh Hefner

Oh, that Ash. Yes he would be good too. I wonder who would win between him and Ketchum? Hmm...

I think the Emmanuelle 2000 intimate encounters serious could benefit form John Rambo

Karl Hungus

Ash tbh.

Bodhidharma

I can think of some films John Rambo could definetly improve.

"The Woodsman" staring Kevin Bacon as a kiddie perv. I mean even the name is an insult to Rambo. In first blood he was THE woodsman. He turned an innocent little forest into a weapon of mass destruction. John could ambush Bacon as he was about to pounce and hang him by the leg, using only a branch.

"Apocalyse Now" - Give that assignment to Rambo and Kurtz is a dead man. And all is his litttle helpers will get some too if they have a problem.

Star Wars, Sense and Sensibility, Jaws and Top Gun could also do with some serious Rambo.

The only film which could not be improved by the presence of Rambo is Rocky.Having those two in the same movie would cause the universe to implode, due to the presence of too much muscles and eightiesness.

ShiverinEskimo

Thought maybe the visualisation would benfit the cause of this thread. Honestly - I can't think of a single movie it wouldn't complement. It would have taken the hobbits half the time to get to mount doom had this guy been in tow. And he would never succumb to the precious.

Retr0gamer

I think Pearl Harbour would have benefitted. The sight of John Rambo mowing down japanese planes with an M60 would have been much more patriotic than Cuba Gooding Juniors cook character using the mounted guns (pfft! Rambo is both the mount and the weapon). Would have also added to one of the greatest comedies of all time.

Alien vs. Predator needed a bit of Rambo. If he was in it from the start the abomination would have only lasted 5 minutes before he emerged victorious.

DaBreno

Pearl Harbour could definitley have used Darth Vader. When the Japanese admiral orders his bombers home rather than attack the Yank carriers, Vader could have phoned him up and uttered "You have failed me for the last time Admiral" while Force-chocking him to obvious horror of his crew.

Ironically, if the Nippons had won the Pacific war and taken California, there probably never would have been a Star Wars. Tis a strange one for tuesday.

Im also of the opinion that Darth would improve any film with Ben Affleck in it, if only to show up and Force-choke him slowly.

omahaid

DaBreno wrote:

Im also of the opinion that Darth would improve any film with Ben Affleck in it, if only to show up and Force-choke him slowly.

Surely it doesn't have to be a film, real life would do. Anywho's, The Matrix Revolutions would have been enhanced a great deal by John Rambo, none of that what ever it was at the end.



And with his own bubble gum?!?!? Unstoppable!

Pigman II

Films that would be improved by the non-presence of Lambo.

1 Veronica Guerin (2003)
2 Spin the Bottle (2003)