Breakup

Epicpriest

me and the girlfriend had a civil discussion, and she decided that after 2 years of trying that she wants out. Or thats what she says. It's clear that the 2 of us love each other very very much. But she's giving me mixed signals.

She e-mails me saying that it's for the best and it took her a long time to come to the decision. But then finishes the e-mails with a "ok hun? x" or something. And then when she's with her friends she's real confident and saying "go get your stuff from the house". But then when she's on her own she's a shambles. She saw me yesteday with her friends and literally broke down. She was then txt'n me all last night saying "if you never loved me then i'll leave you alone" and she was leaving me voicemails saying she needed to have me hold her and and she was crying really badly.

What does it mean? Like she will proably meet her friends again today and be brave again.

Does she still love me and want to be with me? If i know she doesn't, then i'll leave it.

Thanks

DubNside

Sounds like she's confused!

Do you know if there are any "external Sources" influencing her, i.e a friend who may not like you?

Femelade

what age are ye guys? she sounds really really confused.

my little pony

In the exact same situation myself....love my b/f but not sure if we should keep seeing each other for other reasons...I'm totally confused so can understand how she feels, when i'm with my friends I am fine with the break up and 100% sure that i made the right decision but when i'm alone I fall to pieces....Give her time, i would suggest breaking all contact for a while it gives her a chance to clear her head and decide what she really wants......

shinners007

sometimes relationships get to a girl and they need a break for what ever reason.

i went through something similar with my fiance. im 21 and was thinking is this it? alot of stuff gets to you all of a sudden. i wa saying i wanted a break and some space yet i love him to bits. he didnt want a break and loves me.
it got very akward between and i accused him of not trying and when he did give me space i accusd him of not caring.. it just wnt on and on..

we recently sat down and discussed things i was unhappy as the relationship had become boring/routined. i should have just came out with it rather than making excuses. we decided to try again and its going brill. we are engaged and blissfully happy.

sit down and talk to her the space excuse is cock and bull. ok when with friends needing you desperately when alone. plus if you love tell her try head away together/ give it one last chance properly. otherwise you wont no where you stand.

goodluck

Talliesin

Break-ups suck. It sounds like she's set in her mind that she needs to break-up, but the fact remains that break-ups suck. She wants to be able to break-up without any heartache or pain, but she knows the that rarely happens in the real world. Hence her hesitation, her checking on your state, and her partly waiting for you to get to the same place that she's at (whether you actually will or no).

Dreamer 7

Just because she has come to the conclusion that you as a couple are going nowhere, doesnt mean she stops loving you or remembering the good times you had. No matter how much you know someone isnt right it doesnt make it any easier to let them go. It will take time and alot of tears, i would speak to her alone and ask her how she is getting on and why the attitude when her mates are around coz thats not fair

Epicpriest

I saw her today. She is in bits. (we're 25). She is wearing my t-shirt, and called in sick from work. She looks like she went 5 rounds with tyson. Really upset. We were talking and she said she was really really mad everytime she thought of it and kept asking me why did i ruin everything. We then made love, and talked for another while, and then i left and she was still crying. I don't know what to do now. I asked her to pack my stuff up and leave it for collection but she said she can't do it.

Wing Walker

Epicpriest wrote:

We then made love, and talked for another while, and then i left and she was still crying.

Neither of you knows what you want. The best thing to do is just give one another space for a while and then see how each of you feels. That means no texting, calls, going for coffee etc. I know at 25 I was still wasn't fully mature enough in relationships. It'll be hard but you both can sort it out eventually.

Best of luck.

I have to agree with other people; your best bet is to give her and yourself some space. It is the best way to see if you 2 should be together. But if she moves on, don't get yourself too down. Just remember the good times ye had together, and whatever you do do not stop being friends with her for that reason.

LegacyUser

Ah man, Ive been there when you cant let go but you know its for the best in the long term. Girls hate that lonely feeling that comes after a breakup which is why alot of them go on the rebound before guys. They need to be held, told they're gorgeous and given attention. Your gf/ex is looking for the best of both worlds at the moment. You seem ok with the breakup. Please keep us posted.

Epicpriest

Hey, thanks for the advice. We're still talking and she's still upset. I'm upset to. She was talking to my friend and was basically telling him that we aren't going to live together anymore and would like to basically salvage it, but start from the begining kinda thing??

I txt her at 12 last night saying "Night hun x" and she txt back saying night hun miss you x. Then an hour later, she txt me again saying she really misses me.

I'm messed up. We're meeting up tonight for a little while with all of our friends

Epicpriest

Also, if this doesn't go the way i want it to, how do i prepare for it? I'm really upset now and feel in deep disspair when i think of her out having a laugh with other people (fellas). Do i just make the first move with someone else or what? I have a bit of interested from other parties...

LegacyUser

there is no way to prepare for it Im afraid except to make sure it ends on good terms. She seems to want you back now? Id ask her for a straight answer. Dont make the first move with anyone else and dont let it get back to her if you are with someone else. thats when things get very very messy.

Epicpriest

Ok just an update. i'm at my whits end.

We haven't really spoken, i text her to say good night and she got back to me saying she loved me and good night. But i know she doesn't mean it. I wish she'd stop being a coward and just be honest with me.

She's going around work (my friends told me) happy face, waving to people and every is saying she's getting on great. she must have no feelings. she's different to what i thought.

I miss her so much though.

shinners007

she obviously very confused.

but give her some space stop the texting and stuff and maybe than she will come you with her decision since you seem to be waiting around on it.

i dont think its fair when girls break up with a guy and all this i miss you and i love you stuff is expressed everynight through text or whatever.

cut off all contact for a while if she loves you she come back and ye can try again if not you can at least try move on rather than wondering " she says she loves and misses me yet looks happy etc..."

she wanted a break so give her one and dont entertain small chat as its obviously confusing you more.

give it time.
best of luck

Epicpriest

shinners007 wrote:

she obviously very confused.

but give her some space stop the texting and stuff and maybe than she will come you with her decision since you seem to be waiting around on it.

i dont think its fair when girls break up with a guy and all this i miss you and i love you stuff is expressed everynight through text or whatever.

cut off all contact for a while if she loves you she come back and ye can try again if not you can at least try move on rather than wondering " she says she loves and misses me yet looks happy etc..."

she wanted a break so give her one and dont entertain small chat as its obviously confusing you more.

give it time.
best of luck

Ok. But then i think if i don't keep contact she will forget about me?
We lived together (rented house for a year) and i moved out, and now she is getting a girl she works with to move in with her. So the whole living together thing is done with.

My friend just text me to say she was asking if he'd seen me and how was i. She then said "Would you tell me if he was with anyone else" and he stupidly said no he wouldn't. Why is she asking that? i think she wants me to do this to make it easier on her?

shinners007

maybe so maybe she wants you to move on so that she wouldnt be feeling so guilty.

as for her forgetting about you it'l be hard to erase you after a long relationship etc.. plus if she loves you how could she possilbly forget you.

if i were you i'd try forget about and move on, easier said than done i know but it may be for the best as all these mixed feelings and small talk seem petty and childish they only lead to false hope,hurt, confusion and pain.

if your on a break its simple you do your own thing and see hoew it works out, you trying to text her and win her back hasnt worked and it aint looking likely ye'l be moving into gether hence the message is clear move on or hang around waiting for her to get back to you which may never happen

BeardyGit

Ah man - I feel for you.

But the terrible reality is that you're done. This is the bit where the two of you make each other miserable for a while. It's the way it works. When it's all over and done with, when you realise that you just want to get away from all of this messing, don't look back.

The post-mortem's already beginning from the looks of things. Try not to beat yourself up too much. Remember that there are two of you involved in this breakup - You're both responsible and neither of you are to blame - If you know what I mean.

From the sounds of things, neither of you are really emotionally experienced enough to be able to deal with this any better. That's not to say there's a right and a wrong way to go about it. Just that in years to come, you'll realise that you could be easier on yourself and you'd be right to do so.

Don't beat yourself up. But do both of you a favour and cut off all contact for a while. You're not only hurting her, you're hurting yourself and letting her do the same to you in return. If you have to, steer clear of your shared friends for a while. If they're really your friends, they'll understand what the two of you are going through.

Best of luck mate - Don't feel sorry for yourself for too long now.....The more positive you are about everything over the coming months, the easier it's going to be for you to get on with it. And whatever you do, be a man about this and ignore how she behaves in front of your/her friends - It's all a front - You should know better. Cut her some slack for acting like an idiot. But don't feel sorry for her. It's ending for a reason....

Gil

Epicpriest

Ok i bit the bullet yesterday. The vibes were that her friends thought we would get back together.

I called her and told her that if she needs space then thats what she'll get. I told her that i'm here for her if she needs anything and that she should take all the time she needs, and that i won't contact her as i don't want to interfere and get in the way of her decision. She was delighted with this. I went over to get the last of my stuff last night and she was all giggly saying that it was so nice to see me and stuff.

She said that she just needed a couple of weeks to sort her own head out as there was a lot of stuff she needed to change as well..

What do you think? Pulling my leg or what

quad_red

Cos you're clinging onto hope.

But it sounds like she is going through the stages here. Yes, she was distraught etc. But that's a natural part of the process of moving on.

You've just given her a non-committal safety blanket.

I think Talliesin is right. It seems like she's made up her mind - it's only the difficulty of the situation that making her doubt it. Move on man. You have to. If she changes her mind then she has to come to you and then YOU'LL consider it.

But hanging around is selling your dignity off piece by piece. The conclusion will probably still be the same but you'll feel all the more stupid and betrayed.

It's always shocking when someone you loved has 'suddenly' moved on. The truth is that it's always that way for the one who is left behind.

Epicpriest

Dam!

Cr*p. I thought i was doing the right thing. So now she's not gonna be feeling so bad and doubting herself and stuff, and it will gradually get easier for her.

So what do i say now? Just go F*ck yourself for trying to fool me?

shinners007

dont say or do anything.

try move on and deal with the break up it'll make you a stronger and better person. no one has the right to string anyone along.

you told her youd give her space no need for contact plus no need for you to be waiting around for her. she obviously only wanted an easy way out. she's got that so try not make it harder by thinking about it.

if she does come running back then the ball will be in your court than you cn decide what you want. but remember could she do this to you again? more than likely. get over her and enjoy being single again!!!;)

homeOwner

Epicpriest wrote:

Dam!

Cr*p. I thought i was doing the right thing. So now she's not gonna be feeling so bad and doubting herself and stuff, and it will gradually get easier for her.

So what do i say now? Just go F*ck yourself for trying to fool me?

I doubt very much if she is trying to fool you. This is just as hard on her as it is on you. There are reasons you broke up - you know them as well as she does. Personally i think its harder on the person that does the breaking up in situations like these because they are the ones that shoulder alot of the guilt. I am sure she knows how much you are hurting and her ability to put on a brave face in work and to her friends is a defense mechanism. It doesnt mean she doesnt care or isnt just as messed up about this as you are.

My advice is to ride it out with some dignity. You dont want to say anything that you'll look back on in a few weeks and think, I was such a pr1ck. You spent a couple of wonderful years with her, try to let it end on a good note.

MojoMaker

Epicpriest wrote:

Ok i bit the bullet yesterday. The vibes were that her friends thought we would get back together.

I called her and told her that if she needs space then thats what she'll get. I told her that i'm here for her if she needs anything and that she should take all the time she needs, and that i won't contact her as i don't want to interfere and get in the way of her decision. She was delighted with this. I went over to get the last of my stuff last night and she was all giggly saying that it was so nice to see me and stuff.

She said that she just needed a couple of weeks to sort her own head out as there was a lot of stuff she needed to change as well..

What do you think? Pulling my leg or what

In other words you made it easy for her, which is exactly what she wanted, but hadn't the courage to do herself. She can happily now assuage any remaining guilt and tease out the soft landing for a few weeks.

I sympthise though dude, tough one to call.

Epicpriest

MojoMaker wrote:

In other words you made it easy for her, which is exactly what she wanted, but hadn't the courage to do herself. She can happily now assuage any remaining guilt and tease out the soft landing for a few weeks.

I sympthise though dude, tough one to call.

so thers no hope?

shinners007

not at present.

if she does want to try again it will be up to you.
but i wouldnt hold my breath
sorry

Epicpriest

shinners007 wrote:

not at present.

if she does want to try again it will be up to you.
but i wouldnt hold my breath
sorry

OK, i just e-mailed her and told her that it was finished. I got some advice and the people i spoke to thought you were looking for the easy way out and i offered you that.

She just basically said "listen to people then. Oh how wrong they were"

So... thats it then .

Thanks folks.

shinners007

thats good at least now you can try move on.

best of luck mate;)

LegacyUser

To be honest its your decision and it sounds like you are confused too, you can't let what people sat here make up your mind for you as some people will say she is making a fool of you and others won't....at the end of the day you know her better than any of us here so you have to go with what your instincts tell you.....everyone here has given good advice but don't let them make the decision for you as you might regret it.....

DOLEMAN

Wow your girlfriend is seriously taking the piss. She doesn't seem to care about your emotions or how this might be difficult for you too.

From my experience, girls normally have another bloke lined up before they break up with their boyfriend. Did she give off any signs this may have happened?

LegacyUser

It's sad that after two years she still can not communicate honestly with you...

Epicpriest

DOLEMAN wrote:

Wow your girlfriend is seriously taking the piss. She doesn't seem to care about your emotions or how this might be difficult for you too.

From my experience, girls normally have another bloke lined up before they break up with their boyfriend. Did she give off any signs this may have happened?

Well i know she doesn't. But who knows. I thought i knew her. I'm not exactly the ugliest person in the world so i've already been called etc from people i've met in the past asking what i was doing, but i'm just not in the mood for anything else right now. But she is a stunner, and i'll be hard pushed to find an upgrade!

dark_jedi_ire

Jezz Epic almost to the Word this happened to me 4 years ago After being engaged etc for a Couple of years.. its like I wrote all that myself.. jezz I know What your going Though and have gone Through.. Best of luck dude.

I ended up ending it After 3 months of that "dont want to be together but love you and Crying and Texting crap and Acting like its the best day in the World to her mates etc." before I Was starting to lose my sanity big time.. I just bit the bullet and ended it as I Couldnt take Anymore of the stringing along.. Etc etc.. had to build and try keep some sence of self about me

You did right by Ending it . was the best feeling I had after being in hell For months. it will take you time to recover but you Will And be all the better For it. Honestly ,, She seems the type who Will be like that with you even after you break up. geting the odd email and txt still .myself from her. madness. just head games.. And you may get the Same..

Now Im happyier than I ever Was and am getting Married next year to my true solemate so ) be happy ., things will be fine, time to move on . Remember the good Stuff take the lessons learned and start your life again

Best of luck to yeh )

Rob

quad_red

Epicpriest wrote:

Well i know she doesn't. But who knows. I thought i knew her. I'm not exactly the ugliest person in the world so i've already been called etc from people i've met in the past asking what i was doing, but i'm just not in the mood for anything else right now. But she is a stunner, and i'll be hard pushed to find an upgrade!

Err, with that kind of logic you can't go wrong....

Seriously - if it's right for you then it wouldn't be this much bloody work. Move on!

Epicpriest

dark_jedi_ire wrote:

Jezz Epic almost to the Word this happened to me 4 years ago After being engaged etc for a Couple of years.. its like I wrote all that myself.. jezz I know What your going Though and have gone Through.. Best of luck dude.

I ended up ending it After 3 months of that "dont want to be together but love you and Crying and Texting crap and Acting like its the best day in the World to her mates etc." before I Was starting to lose my sanity big time.. I just bit the bullet and ended it as I Couldnt take Anymore of the stringing along.. Etc etc.. had to build and try keep some sence of self about me

You did right by Ending it . was the best feeling I had after being in hell For months. it will take you time to recover but you Will And be all the better For it. Honestly ,, She seems the type who Will be like that with you even after you break up. geting the odd email and txt still .myself from her. madness. just head games.. And you may get the Same..

Now Im happyier than I ever Was and am getting Married next year to my true solemate so ) be happy ., things will be fine, time to move on . Remember the good Stuff take the lessons learned and start your life again

Best of luck to yeh )

Rob

Not looking good for me then... So have you seen her with anyone else since? Thats my main worry. I'll have to arrange a get out of jail free card for the weekend now...

Epicpriest

quad_red wrote:

Err, with that kind of logic you can't go wrong....

Seriously - if it's right for you then it wouldn't be this much bloody work. Move on!

But i love her. Truly. The reason this happened was because i was being a jealous idiot for a long time. Maybe she just thought that we moved in together to soon and a break is what we needed. I dunno.

I won't be stuck if you know what i mean but it's just a total change of everything in my life...

Aura

From my own very recent experience in breaking up with my boyfriend who I thought I could see a long future with... when people say they need space no matter how much you're hurting and how much you feel you've got to hold on to what's important you have to give it to them. You can't make someone talk when they're not ready. Some people are talkers, some need to walk away before they can communicate. The hard part is finding a middle ground and unfortunately if you're the talker that involves compromising your urge to spill out how you're feeling and leaving things until you can both talk. So while I agree it's not fair on you to leave things so open ended or for you always to be the one left hanging thus allowing yourself suffer more by not knowing how things stand, I strongly advise if you do love this girl and if your two years together have been for the most part happy then give her a few weeks at least. It'll be hell inside for you but maybe you need to look at building yourself up anyway and find the place where you were when you two first got together.

Please take it from me there's no rushing emotions.

Good luck!

A

Marksie

Epicpriest wrote:

The reason this happened was because i was being a jealous idiot for a long time. ..

I think that once the dust has settled it may be good to review things.
Several things have come across though.

Freinds have been telling you this and that which was probably confusing issues.

I was on the receiving end of someone who was jealous and in the end i got out, i still loved her, but couldnt take any more.

What is your gut (or intuition) feeling. What your or her friends tell you may be coloured by their perceptions or yours!
Dont forget, when at work or out you put a different face on and cheerfulness may be forced.
whats the line of the song:
"people say i am the life of the party cos i tell a joke or two...etc."

For now a clean break is what is needed.

your head is whirling with thoughts and doubts.
Just dont talk with friends about it, get away. go out. do what you like doing.

I wish you the best

Darragh29

DOLEMAN wrote:

From my experience, girls normally have another bloke lined up before they break up with their boyfriend. Did she give off any signs this may have happened?

This is quite true I think. I think girls can be like monkeys swinging their way through a forest, they won't let go of one tree until they have a good firm hold on another one. I'd be doing a little more research here, if only for completeness, so you know you're not been made a fool of. No doubt if she has someone else lined up and you discover it after the two of you have broken up, you'll be given get the auld "I met him after we broke up" chestnut. I'd say scratch a little deeper my friend, she sounds like she is up to something and isn't putting you fully in the picture.

ravenhead

Epicpriest wrote:

OK, i just e-mailed her and told her that it was finished. I got some advice and the people i spoke to thought you were looking for the easy way out and i offered you that.

She just basically said "listen to people then. Oh how wrong they were"

So... thats it then .

Thanks folks.

Ok ... did you not listen to what she said here
"listen to people then. Oh how wrong they were"

I'm sorry but you're thick!!! she basically told you that what you're thinking is wrong... has it ever occurred to you that maybe she just got cold feet & needed time to think about stuff - being in a long term relationship takes time & effort .... maybe she just needed to be sure that you are the one, & try to work on the issues that were making her 'what to get out'!!

Why didn't you just respect her enough to give her what she was asking for 'SPACE'!!!!!

Dude you messed up!

LegacyUser

so girls are like monkeys? hmm its true i had another fella lined up after my ex but i didnt want it or tried to get it to work out like that. i had been taking alot of **** from my ex and never felt sure if breaking up was the right thing. he was the first fella i never went out with and basically saw nothing but good in him even when he was being cruel.
talking to friends and the new guy made me realise how foolish i had been. it made me feel stronger to have a guy interested in me before the break up, kinda like there were fish in the sea.

Darragh29

girls/monkeys? wrote:

so girls are like monkeys? hmm its true i had another fella lined up after my ex but i didnt want it or tried to get it to work out like that. i had been taking alot of **** from my ex and never felt sure if breaking up was the right thing. he was the first fella i never went out with and basically saw nothing but good in him even when he was being cruel.
talking to friends and the new guy made me realise how foolish i had been. it made me feel stronger to have a guy interested in me before the break up, kinda like there were fish in the sea.

It worked out like that all the same for you though. Maybe you wouldn't have broken up with your boyfriend at the time if this other lad didn't appear on the scene. I'm just making the point that the girl in this case is being evasive and appears to be blowing hot and cold and wrecking the guys head in the process. This whole, "I need space" chestnut is a cop-out, it's up there with "it's not you it's me" in terms of the top ten stupid phrases that are said in relationships. If you need space in a relationship, just spend less time together but stay a couple. Have your nights out with your friends, be it with the lads or the girls, or have your night in with the bottle of wine and watch Desparate Housewives or 24 or whatever. That will give you space. Wanting to be single is a completely different thing, that means you do not want to be in a relationship with a person and you want out, so you have no contact with the person. This girl seems to want to a bit of everything, at different particular times while for reasons unknown does not want to be in a relationship. If she wants "space" give her permanent space. Go out and meet someone else who you get on better with and who is better looking! My money says then she would be back in a shot wanting to try it again and would have got some sense in the meantime. Thats what me thinks...

BeardyGit

girls/monkeys? wrote:

so girls are like monkeys? hmm its true i had another fella lined up after my ex but i didnt want it or tried to get it to work out like that. i had been taking alot of **** from my ex and never felt sure if breaking up was the right thing. he was the first fella i never went out with and basically saw nothing but good in him even when he was being cruel.
talking to friends and the new guy made me realise how foolish i had been. it made me feel stronger to have a guy interested in me before the break up, kinda like there were fish in the sea.

You most certainly DID want it to work out like that. Or else you're easily led and a bit foolish not to see that the 'other fella' had ulterior motivation for sniffing around you at the time.

You got someone who was paying you compliments and so you grabbed a hold and took some sort of 'strength' from that? He told you what you wanted to hear, and you know that now, don't you?

Darragh29

Gil_Dub wrote:

You most certainly DID want it to work out like that. Or else you're easily led and a bit foolish not to see that the 'other fella' had ulterior motivation for sniffing around you at the time.

You got someone who was paying you compliments and so you grabbed a hold and took some sort of 'strength' from that? He told you what you wanted to hear, and you know that now, don't you?

I think there is a certain type of guy out there who moves in on girls who are having problems in a relationship, giving an apparently sympathethic ear at first and then pushing their own agenda a bit further each time, "I wouldn't treat you like that" and all the rest of it. This can prompt a girl to throw the towel in on a relationship prematurily that might otherwise have been resolvable, given space and some understanding, on the suttle promptings of a third part with an obviously vested interest and in the case of this thread, I think the OP should look into this possibility a bit closer. I know guys who think their birthday has come when a girl starts talking about her relationship being on the rocks. They think they are in like Flynn for very little work on their part.

Epicpriest

Everyopne is telling me different stuff. her bro is telling me to give her the bit of space. i spoke to her yesterday and she said she was basically deciding whether we should still be seeing eacother or just be friends. But she said that she feels she wants to start over with me. SHe wanted to go for a walk on the beach to chat about stuff, and i said she should take a little more time.

So we said we'll talk again after the weekend. Her friends think it's gonna work out. I on the other hand am not so sure.

koneko

Good, and don't be sure, it sounds like it could go either way. Personally I think it sounds like more of a headache, but if you really care for her then see where this "talk" goes. At the end of the day people can give their advice here until the cows come home, but it's about you and what makes you happy.

Darragh29

Fien, you should hit town this weekend and put yourself back firmly on the scene!!! This one sounds like a complete wreck the head, "I'M going to decide whether we do x,y or z"!?!?! Either she is into you are she's not, if she has to spend the weekend thinkning about it, she ain't the one for you! That's a complete insult to you as a guy, she is basically saying to you, "I'm not sure I'm into you enough to stay with you, so I'll try to convince myself over the weekend that I can stay with you". Fu*k that my son, get out there this weekend with your mates and meet someone normal who knows what she wants!

Epicpriest

Darragh29 wrote:

Fien, you should hit town this weekend and put yourself back firmly on the scene!!! This one sounds like a complete wreck the head, "I'M going to decide whether we do x,y or z"!?!?! Either she is into you are she's not, if she has to spend the weekend thinkning about it, she ain't the one for you! That's a complete insult to you as a guy, she is basically saying to you, "I'm not sure I'm into you enough to stay with you, so I'll try to convince myself over the weekend that I can stay with you". Fu*k that my son, get out there this weekend with your mates and meet someone normal who knows what she wants!

Im workin on it!

LegacyUser

Epicpriest wrote:

i spoke to her yesterday and she said she was basically deciding whether we should still be seeing eacother or just be friends.

why should it be her that makes the call and leave you begging??? You need to show her that while you care about her you are NOT going to let this be a dragged out mess of a thing. be firm but fair.

Epicpriest

maxwellhouse wrote:

why should it be her that makes the call and leave you begging??? You need to show her that while you care about her you are NOT going to let this be a dragged out mess of a thing. be firm but fair.

Ok i did it, i called over on Friday and asked her how she felt. She reluctantly said there was a lot less pressure on her, and at the moment she said she's still not ready for us to get back together.

So i took the initiative and told her that there was 2 of us oin this and that i coudn't sit back and let someone else who will hardly give me any information make a decision like this about my life. I said that i'd be the bigger man and walk away, she was crying and kissing me but didn't stop me. She was very upset.

I think i gave her what she wanted. She hasn't contacted me since. So it looks like it's all over. I'm devastated though. I'm finding it very hard to deal with. My chest feels like someone has hit me with a bat, it aches so bad, heart is beating really fast etc.

Help