Beware of Ninjitsu Gardai !!

yomchi

I got pulled over at a check point the other night. Routine stop. The cop had a look in the van and saw kick shields etc. "ah so ye do a bit of kick boxin?" he said..

"well mainly Taekwon-Do" says I, "I do a bit of BJJ and CHKD and a lot of years boxin" I added.

"I do a bit of JJ my self, but mainly Ninjitsu" he says.

He's just about to let me on, and I says "sure I might meet you on the mat sometime"

" Yeh but you'll be on your back and I'll be on top" he says with a smart arse grin.

So I says "yeh thats because I'll be chokin the **** out of ye with a triangle"

He didn't like it at all, his attitude changed and he did me for havin a baldy front tyre!!

beware of Garda ninja'a on the prowl around Dublin 7!!

:rolleyes:

breadmonkey

I was hoping the story would continue

"......at which point I jumped out of the car, took the double leg, and unleashed a furious g'n'p on the unsuspecting Garda.":D

topdog8

Jon did i not teach u a thing or 2 bout rear naked choke u would of had that rookie put to sleep in 15 secs. See he was intimidated bythe look of you thats wat it was he knew u wud of taking him

memphis

Jon wrote:

I got pulled over at a check point the other night. Routine stop. The cop had a look in the van and saw kick shields etc. "ah so ye do a bit of kick boxin?" he said..

"well mainly Taekwon-Do" says I, "I do a bit of BJJ and CHKD and a lot of years boxin" I added.

"I do a bit of JJ my self, but mainly Ninjitsu" he says.

He's just about to let me on, and I says "sure I might meet you on the mat sometime"

" Yeh but you'll be on your back and I'll be on top" he says with a smart arse grin.

So I says "yeh thats because I'll be chokin the **** out of ye with a triangle"

He didn't like it at all, his attitude changed and he did me for havin a baldy front tyre!!

beware of Garda ninja'a on the prowl around Dublin 7!!

:rolleyes:

One word sums him up.......... A-hole

yomchi

topdog8 wrote:

Jon did i not teach u a thing or 2 bout rear naked choke u would of had that rookie put to sleep in 15 secs. See he was intimidated bythe look of you thats wat it was he knew u wud of taking him

I'll listen more carefully in class TD!

Heard you pulled a draw in Limerick

topdog8

yeah man the biggest load of **** my fitness killed me. but to be fair he was a great fighter and had obviously put the effort in he was in great shape

yomchi

topdog8 wrote:

yeah man the biggest load of **** my fitness killed me. but to be fair he was a great fighter and had obviously put the effort in he was in great shape

Yeh you'd want to loose that gut

Still you weren't beaten!

See you thursday, Eugene will have my head if im not out!

topdog8

yeah ill catch u out there. i must come down the next time you's are sparring for the session

yomchi

No prob, bring your gum shield!

Tim_Murphy

LOL, that's what you get for being cheeky Jon!

Musashi

Moral is probably when your getting away with it, don't get lippy with the Garda!
If he told you he did Tae Bo the correct answer would be "I hear it's great exercise, have a nice night Garda!"

yomchi

Tim_Murphy wrote:

LOL, that's what you get for being cheeky Jon!

I'll learn the hard way!

yomchi

Musashi wrote:

Moral is probably when your getting away with it, don't get lippy with the Garda!
If he told you he did Tae Bo the correct answer would be "I hear it's great exercise, have a nice night Garda!"

LOL

Roper

This might sound random, but Europe (yes, them) had a song called "Ninja Survive". Excellent big hair rock. I bet if you had that on your stereo that Garda would have let you pass....

Think I'll stop drinkin about now........................

Millionaire

Oh never give cheek to a Gardai!

The boys just love busting lippy Dubs!

Valmont

breadmonkey wrote:

I was hoping the story would continue

"......at which point I jumped out of the car, took the double leg, and unleashed a furious g'n'p on the unsuspecting Garda.":D

LOL, if only

sounds like this guy needs to tapped! His club probably let him win all the time because they are afraid he'll do them for road offences on the way out

RedRaven

Jon wrote:

I got pulled over at a check point the other night. Routine stop. The cop had a look in the van and saw kick shields etc. "ah so ye do a bit of kick boxin?" he said..

"well mainly Taekwon-Do" says I, "I do a bit of BJJ and CHKD and a lot of years boxin" I added.

"I do a bit of JJ my self, but mainly Ninjitsu" he says.

He's just about to let me on, and I says "sure I might meet you on the mat sometime"

" Yeh but you'll be on your back and I'll be on top" he says with a smart arse grin.

So I says "yeh thats because I'll be chokin the **** out of ye with a triangle"

He didn't like it at all, his attitude changed and he did me for havin a baldy front tyre!!

beware of Garda ninja'a on the prowl around Dublin 7!!

:rolleyes:

Well he cant wear his Garda uniform on the mat so he wont be able to abuse his position because he couldnt take a bit of backchat...try and get his name so when he competes the lads will know who he is and they can make sure to test his skills if ya know what I mean!!!;)

yomchi

RedRaven wrote:

Well he cant wear his Garda uniform on the mat so he wont be able to abuse his position because he couldnt take a bit of backchat...try and get his name so when he competes the lads will know who he is and they can make sure to test his skills if ya know what I mean!!!;)

Good idea! But if he's a ninja won't he just keep disappearing any time you shoot in on him?

RedRaven

Jon wrote:

Good idea! But if he's a ninja won't he just keep disappearing any time you shoot in on him?

Yeah thats true, but dont they need to do some sort of finger combos to become invisible...now how can he do that if he gets a round kick or a knee in the hand!!!

mirwillbeback

i swear to god the gardai are clowns. i brought a neighbour who's a copper to loughlnstown bjj and threw him round like a rag doll. two years on and EVERYTIME i meet him he compliments me and says he'll be back soon!
if i was on the beat with the amount of scum around, i'd want to be fully prepared. although if there are " ninja gardai " on the prowl, maybe they disappear with a trace of smoke?

RedRaven

mirwillbeback wrote:

i swear to god the gardai are clowns. i brought a neighbour who's a copper to loughlnstown bjj and threw him round like a rag doll. two years on and EVERYTIME i meet him he compliments me and says he'll be back soon!
if i was on the beat with the amount of scum around, i'd want to be fully prepared. although if there are " ninja gardai " on the prowl, maybe they disappear with a trace of smoke?

Well if they did disappear in a puff of smoke technically they would be breaking the law because as they are on duty they wouldnt be allowed smoke under current legislation!!;);)

pma-ire

mirwillbeback wrote:

although if there are " ninja gardai " on the prowl, maybe they disappear with a trace of smoke?

they are all great at that!!

just you go looking for them when a big scrap breaks out in town!!!

POOF

(smoke provided by the clapped out Diesel engines in the cop cars!! )

vasch_ro

mirwillbeback wrote:

i swear to god the gardai are clowns. i brought a neighbour who's a copper to loughlnstown bjj and threw him round like a rag doll. two years on and EVERYTIME i meet him he compliments me and says he'll be back soon!
if i was on the beat with the amount of scum around, i'd want to be fully prepared. although if there are " ninja gardai " on the prowl, maybe they disappear with a trace of smoke?

I suspect this is an out and out troll, I will be Loughlinstown tonight and will defend the honour of the force !!!!
On a more serious note though self defence training is a major problem in the force , for example while I was in Templemore I did my self defence training in 1 day ( yes thats 1 day ) ,luckily John Kavanagh invited myself and few of my colleagues out to Harolds Cross for a bit of "live" training and it was a real eye opener , and one "move" in particular has been used to great effect I think its called the "seatbelt" its derived from the ISR Matrix that john teaches.

Jon :The biggest source of complaints received about the force refer to politeness and general demeanour , if you feel you have a genuine grievance my advice would be to avail of the complaints procedure.
However "mrwillbeback" to my mind calling us all "clowns" is a little unfair, I would like to think I am not a clown , although maybe the people on the board that know me could enlighten me !:D

pma-ire

vasch_ro wrote:

However "mrwillbeback" to my mind calling us all "clowns" is a little unfair, I would like to think I am not a clown , although maybe the people on the board that know me could enlighten me !:D

I heard something said about this on the radio the other night!!

When you make a generalisation you are gonna insult the individual without prior thought or meaning to do so.

vasch_ro

pma-ire wrote:

I heard something said about this on the radio the other night!!

When you make a generalisation you are gonna insult the individual without prior thought or meaning to do so.

Consider me insulted !!

Dagon

Hehe.. mad thread!

But speaking in the defence of MA Gardai, one of the lads from my club is a member of the garda and he is the top fighter in the club (and some say the country) full stop. He's a world champion two or three times over, and nobody in the club can beat him when sparring, he's ultra quick. Total respect where it's due and all :cool:

pma-ire

Dagon wrote:

Hehe.. mad thread!

But speaking in the defence of MA Gardai, one of the lads from my club is a member of the garda and he is the top fighter in the club (and some say the country) full stop. He's a world champion two or three times over, and nobody in the club can beat him when sparring, he's ultra quick. Total respect where it's due and all :cool:

"All credit to" the Garda that gets off his arse and gets down and dirty to learn something that could save his life or that of others. When "at the end of the day" it should be supplied to them by the state.

(Sorry on a Roy Keane Buzz today!! )

"Fair to prepare, prepare to fail!!"

vasch_ro

Just to update the thread, there was no sign of mrwillbeback last at Next Generation Loughlinstown.....maybe he was too scared ?

PMA-IRE i agree , the training needs to be stepped up a serious notch for full time members of the Garda, I wonder how much of the 56 hrs the reservists get for training will be given over to self defence ?

gstack

Vasch did you ever train with the garda judo team ?
Are they any good ?

vasch_ro

the ans is no i did not and I do not know how good they are ...................

Roper

Is this the Garda self defense programme? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lwk8wf3giJQ&search=ninja

r3nu4l

You gotta love the over-inflated ego of "martial artists" and the "Meet me on the mat" brigade. :rolleyes:

A true martial artist leaves their ego at the door when it comes to their art and isn't interested in showing how good (or bad!) they are. They are their to study and learn and ready to use what they've learned when they need to. You never stop learning.

Seriously though, why the big ego. If you're good, well done, pat on the back, just get on with it.

Anyone who says different better be prepared to meet me on the mat I'll be the one practicing the "Chuck Norris beard rash" move, which leaves opponents scarred for life.

vasch_ro

Roper wrote:

Is this the Garda self defense programme? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lwk8wf3giJQ&search=ninja

I wasn't sure at first , but when he took his Ninja hood off I recognised my self defence instructor straight away !!!!:)

pma-ire

vasch_ro wrote:

PMA-IRE i agree , the training needs to be stepped up a serious notch for full time members of the Garda, I wonder how much of the 56 hrs the reservists get for training will be given over to self defence ?

At the rate they are going with Garda restraint and control/self defence training. Some of the reservists may be better trained in this than the Gardai if they have been in the martial arts?? :rolleyes:

vasch_ro

r3nu4l wrote:

You gotta love the over-inflated ego of "martial artists" and the "Meet me on the mat" brigade. :rolleyes:

A true martial artist leaves their ego at the door when it comes to their art and isn't interested in showing how good (or bad!) they are. They are their to study and learn and ready to use what they've learned when they need to. You never stop learning.

Seriously though, why the big ego. If you're good, well done, pat on the back, just get on with it.

Anyone who says different better be prepared to meet me on the mat I'll be the one practicing the "Chuck Norris beard rash" move, which leaves opponents scarred for life.

I'm not sure who this is aimed at, but i would agree with some of the sentiments, and by the by I don't need to get laid either !:D

r3nu4l

Certainly wasn't aimed at you vasch_ro and the bit about the beard rash move was a joke, not an attempt to get you into bed :eek: While I don't object to other people partaking in man to man pleasure, it's definitely not for me!

I just think that if someons has to brag about how tough they are and make offers to people to "meet me on the mat" and all of that rubbish then they must be deeply insecure in themselves. Either that or they watched Karate Kid too often at an impressionable age!

Miles Long

A good friend of mine, a garda, attained his BB in judo with the garda club. He got that (some japanese term when you win all of you matches) and said they still didn't like the garda club on principal or something. Does any one think of including them in invitational competitions?

conj

HERE IS THE ALTERNATIVE:D
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/108737/a_man_attacks_cop/

LukeyJudo22

miles the word your looking for is batsugan.

I dont know why anyone from the judo wouldnt like the garda club on principle?

I used to train with the garda club a year or two ago. All a great bunch of lads and they have strong judo. I still train with a few members from the club.

TapouT

vasch_ro wrote:

the ans is no i did not and I do not know how good they are ...................

Their not bad. But we're better!... (Army Judo club)

Which reminds me, anyone here in the defence forces?. We have a very active Judo club with regular training camps and competitions both at home and oversea's.

Miles Long

I haven't got the hang of emotions in writing. I believe it was a healthy want to "one up" the garda seeing as they are a police force, An unwritten rivalry if you will between the garda and everyone...:D

LukeyJudo22

Miles Long wrote:

I haven't got the hang of emotions in writing. I believe it was a healthy want to "one up" the garda seeing as they are a police force, An unwritten rivalry if you will between the garda and everyone...:D

"Oh it's a joke! I get jokes!" -homer

Miles Long

Just as a Q, Do many Garda, because presumably they are on the beat or warrenting etc at some stage, go and train in other forms of MA/SD than those taught in training for the uniform?

vasch_ro

I would say that like in most walks of life martial arts is in the minority , most of my colleagues involved in sports pursuits seemed to be mainly involved in GAA and soccer which i guess would have the strongest followings across all jobs/professions in Ireland, personally I was already involved in Karate( Wado Ryu ) before signing up to the thin blue line and any other Gardai who practise martial arts were also involved in martial arts g before they signed up.

pma-ire

vasch_ro wrote:

I would say that like in most walks of life martial arts is in the minority , most of my colleagues involved in sports pursuits seemed to be mainly involved in GAA and soccer which i guess would have the strongest followings across all jobs/professions in Ireland, personally I was already involved in Karate( Wado Ryu ) before signing up to the thin blue line and any other Gardai who practise martial arts were also involved in martial arts g before they signed up.

Just on that line of thinking Vasch!!

How do Gardai feel about the training they get in arrest and self defence??

yomchi

I was a taxi driver for a few months. Driving around Dublin at 3 0r 4 in the morning you get a good close look at how untrained the Gardai are when it comes to restraining people. I've seen wrestling matches where 3 or 4 guards will be trying to take one guys arm up his back. You'd be sitting in the car watching several easy techniques go astray, something they could learn in an hour at a class somewhere.

vasch_ro

most of them make fun of the training because its so limited , which then results as jon has pointed out in 3 or 4 struggling against one fella................
( although admittedly sometimes alchohol/drugs can make people surprisingly difficult to manage )

yomchi

true, I should have mentioned that. Drugs like cocaine etc will give them extra determination. However I've often said to myself.. just jab him in the eye, yank a finger back.. that'll cause him so flynch for sec to stick on cuffs. Having said that there a probably disciplinary reasons why you can't do that.
Give em pepper spray!

vasch_ro

well thats why wrestling/grappling/bjj is so suited for keeping the peace beacuse there is no striking involved, I wouldn't like to have to explain to a Judge in the circuit court why I had to jab someone in the eye !!!:)

yomchi

vasch_ro wrote:

well thats why wrestling/grappling/bjj is so suited for keeping the peace beacuse there is no striking involved, I wouldn't like to have to explain to a Judge in the circuit court why I had to jab someone in the eye !!!:)

Your honour it was a drastic accident...

pma-ire

Jon wrote:

I was a taxi driver for a few months. Driving around Dublin at 3 0r 4 in the morning you get a good close look at how untrained the Gardai are when it comes to restraining people. I've seen wrestling matches where 3 or 4 guards will be trying to take one guys arm up his back. You'd be sitting in the car watching several easy techniques go astray, something they could learn in an hour at a class somewhere.

Or maybe some old guy with years of experience in teaching such things could come in twice a year and give them a few ideas??