what do you do when you lose motivation?

Seraphina

its been six months since i started at the gym properly. 3 times a week, weights and cardio, and started vastly improving my diet.

i've seen VERY little in terms of results. i have built muscle. i am stronger and fitter, but thats it.

i have lost little to no bodyfat, i am not getting the toned and defined look i want. there has been no visual difference to my body, which is the aim of the trips to the gym.
i know it takes a while, but honestly, i really think considering the changes i've made to my lifestyle, that i should be seeing SOMETHING? anything??

i'm really struggling to see reasons to continue wasting hours of my life at the gym every week, it seems so pointless. i can sit at home, eat alot more unhealthily, and still look no different.
its very disheartening, and as pathetic as it may seem, i really feel like crying right now. im putting so much work in and nothing is happening. i am so frustrated and i hate my body for its lack of response to anything i do to try improve it.
i read so much on this board, to try make sure im not doing things wrong. i honestly dont know what to do anymore.

amazingemmet

Can you post exactly what your doing and eating and your stats, seems like your program could do with a shake up. As for motivation try this if you don't stick with it you'll end up on that site.

g'em

It can be incredibly hard to keep going when you reach points like this. It's one thing to look in the mirror and not be particulalry happy with what you see, when you know that you're the only one to blame for your extra lbs/ lack of tone/ unfitness. But when you've put in the hard graft and you still don't see any noticeable changes its just downright sh**e!!!

Well, there's a few different ways of looking at things.

How we see ourselves is often markedly different how to others see us physically. Just like most women, when I look in the mirror I tend have quite blinkered vision and really only see the bits I don't like (of which there are very few, goddess that I am.. yuh, sure ). When others look at me they see something quite different. Only last night I was having one of my bi-weekly moans about my waistline. A good friend of mine, a bloke, disagreed, and I know it wasn't in a 'I'm-just-gonna-agree-with-you-to-keep-the-peace' ways, he said it coz he meant it. Thing is, I've shed four inches off my waist. Others see that, but all I see is the last inch or two I still need to lose. Or worse, I start comparing my waist to the competition-skinny girls that I hope to someday stand beside (while conveniently forgetting that they've been on 1400 calorie a day diets for four weeks, along with a fair amount of dehydration and starvation of course.. um, maybe I'm not sure I wanna get into that game after all ). And maybe you're just not finding it easy to see the progress you've actually made because its happening slowly. I'm pretty sure that any of your honest friends will tell you that all that work has paid off and chances are you're the picture of health.

Or maybe you still need to make a few tweaks to your routines and regimes. I've spent years and years putting up with wildly fluctuating weight, and slowly but surely I've been teaching myself about what the right way of going about weight loss is. Now, its coming off slowly and staying off. I'm a firm believer in little steps- making one small step at a time and making a concious effort to make each one stick. Maybe you're still allowing yourself indulgences that you don't even realise are indulgences at all? Loads of people follow 'low-fat' or 'low-calorie' diets without realising that their sources of food are just as important as how many numbers you can attach to them. Ready-meals (low-fat included), snack bars, slim shakes, 'health' snacks... its so easy to believe the empty claims they make, I know I did.

Or maybe an initial weight-loss has led to a slow in your metabolism and you've reached a plateau, which happens to a lot of people. The best way to get through it, is to kick-start your metabolism by upping your weights, making a few changes to your diet (introduce a 'cheat meal' and keep the rest of your diet super clean), drinking more green tea, drink iced water first thing... But if truth be told, plateaus are often not plateaus at all, but the weight loss slows down from dipping your hand once too often in the biscuit tin, or having an extra serving at dinner, or somewhere along the lines having maybe a little bit more food than you know you need to have. The hardest thing is being completely and totally truthfully honest with yourself about it.

But think about what you've said...

i have built muscle. i am stronger and fitter.

that's a huge achievement!! you should pat yourself on the back for that! And there really and truly is no miracle, super-quick way of doing it. Can you honestly say you don't sleep better, have more endurance, see a difference in you skin, hair, nails? Do you not have a bit of a spring in your step and find it easier to run for a bus/ dance all night/ move around in general? Can you honestly say that you don't just.. well just 'feel' better?

You and I both know that going back to unhealthy eating and taking no exercise is a complete waste of time as well as life. Six months really isn't that long a time- it took me a good year before I started to see the real imrpovements from my new healthier lifestyle. Now I can't imagine being any other way, and I still love running into people I haven't seen in ages- being told how healthy and glowing you look never gets old!!! Keep doing what you're doing, have faith in yourself, and of course you know there's always going to be someone around here to keep you going or just give you a kick up the arse when needed. And trust me, we all need it sometimes. Needless to say, post up your diet, or even pm it to me if you want a second opinion or just a point in the right direction if you feel theres a few holes in it.

Oh and need I remind you that over on another forum you've been in the running for the 'Best Looking Bird on Boards' title??!?

amazingemmet wrote:

As for motivation try this if you don't stick with it you'll end up on that site.

oh god.. my retinas... they're burning...

justsomebloke

ye your best bet is to post up your diet, and what you are doing in the gym and also what your goals are actually are.

As gem said you probably haven't noticed that much difference because it is happening slowly over a long period but it is happening. If you have put on muscle but have no gotten rid of fat you would be heavier then when you started as you haven't put that in i am gathering that you are at least the same wait so therefor you have actually lost some fat. Also what was your percentage bodyfat before you started. i would hazard a guess that you don't know and i would also hazard a guess that you don't know what it is now. But i can tell you that if you are eating well and exercising that it probably is not the same and that is has gone down.

The hardest part of losing weight is the not losing it fast but it is generally the best way of doing it cause it means that it is easier to keep off in the long road.

Just remember you are a healtier person the you where when you started so that is a mayor plus, also as g'em also pointed out that you have been mentioned on the best burd thread so things couldn't be going that bad (had a quick look for the pic but didn't find it so post a link;) )

So my advise would be, take a week off and rest. During the week take a good look at your diet and work out and see if there really is nothing wrong with either. However i would suggest if you haven't done it already changing your routine and try different things to see if they are better suited for you. I would also suggest maybe join a club of some sort of sport that you enjoy this way the doing the exercise may feel less like a chore and could be something that you enjoy doing.

The main thing however is don't let it get to you and don't cry about it (actually do cry and get it out of the way and move on). But it can be hard sometimes and sometimes you mightn't feel like it is going well but truthfully if you look at it properly it will be. I have been trying to lose weight on and off now for say 4-5 years. My first attempt was quite similar to you, was training 3-4 times a week and eating "well" but didn't lose that much weight however i was fitter, stronger and healtier. However as i didn't see the results i thought i should have had i let it go and put back on the weight i had loss, so i ended up being heavier then i was initally as i had the extra muscle. However since then i have had a couple of more tries each with better success as i have changed things in both my diet and routine to suit me and what works for me and now i am down 3 stone and am just 1/2 a stone off my lowest weight (went travelling for a year, booze and food suprlising wheren't good for diet, who would of guessed). So i hope you take some heart from peoples replies and hope you do keep it up, trust me you will be happier for it:)

justsomebloke

sorry one last thing the best way to get back the motivation is to get a good looking training buddy of the opposite sex (or same sex whatever) who you quite fancy and go to the gym with them. you'll be surprised how much further you will push your self to try and impress them;)

daveirl

This post has been deleted.

Seraphina

amazingemmet wrote:

Can you post exactly what your doing and eating and your stats, seems like your program could do with a shake up. As for motivation try this if you don't stick with it you'll end up on that site.

earlier post
beware, its long!

this was my program from just after christmas until maybe mid feb. it was taking 2 1/2 hours which i just didn't have to be spending in the gym (kept missing dinner!) so i asked one of the guys in crunch to help me shorten it. i now do

warm up
2x15 reps on leg press (weight now much higher, tis a good struggle to finish the last reps)
2x12 shoulder press (again, heavy enough, struggle to finish second set)
2x 15 lat pulldown (not particularly heavy, could prob lift more)

2x 12 5kg bicep curl (not difficult but not interested in building more muslce here, arms will look great when i loose the fat off them :rolleyes: )
2x12 4kg tricep something or other (arm and knee on bench, arm folded parallel to floor, extend arm behind, pause, lower arm) does that make sense?

3x 30 second 'roll outs' elbows on one of those small gym balls, its just a bridge only tougher as balance is more difficult.
3x 15 russian twists.

plus 1 hour cardio (30 min fast walk random incline heart rate between 140-150)
30 mins whatever machine i feel like jumping on that day (i like variety)

diet is essentially the same i think, though i am struggling to 'snack' healthily as i am studying all the time and its hard not to snack (even just to relieve boredom ) i try going for fruit or low fat yoghurt, tho wholemeal bread and honey is my fav! this unforuntately also tends to be in the evening when my activity levels drop to zero. was thinking of investing in some protein shakes, just to have something relatively guilt free to fill me up in the evenings. also for after my workouts too obviously - would it be a waste of money considering im not really doing alot of weights?

i dont really feel like i am pushing myself. its a long time since i have felt wrecked after the gym or sore the next day, but i honestly dont know where to go. so many conflicting methods and ideas, i really dont know enough to make educated decisions

Seraphina

daveirl wrote:

This post has been deleted.

ha! i may not be practically dying after each session, but i sometimes feel like im the only girl there sweating i dont drink sugary drinks anyway - im a two litres of water a day now woman! (apart from the blackcurrant i mix with my vodka but thats always no added sugar when i buy it for myself in the shop)

g'em

Seraphina wrote:

i dont really feel like i am pushing myself.

ok.. well here's the not so good news... you're not. pushing yourself, that is. At least probably not enough to get the goals you want. Do I take it from the post that this is the same workout you do every single session? And you do it three times a week?

I'm going to presume that's the case. Ok, so you have the time to visit the gym three times a week for an hour and a half each time. Why not split your visits so theat each day you concentrate on a different body part? As it stands right now you're doing only a small amount of resistance for each body part, so while it's fine for building a small amount of strength it probably isn't enough to build to meet the requirments you need. So, maybe back and chest for day 1, shoulders, biceps and triceps for day 2 and legs for day 3. Get in two exercises per body part, one compound, one isolated, and that will help you get a 'sculpted' look to your muscles.

e.g. chest: bench and fly's
back: lat pulldown and deadlift
shoulders: shoulder press and lat raises
biceps: ez bar curls
triceps: dips or extensions
legs: squats, squats, squats, squats, leg curls, leg extensions, and did I metnion squats (these are such effective exercises they could nearly be done on their own as the only leg exercise you do).
Do three sets of each, 10-12 reps a go, and add in some core and ab work.

The goal is to make your body work with you, not against you. The more you increase your muscle mass, the more you'll increase your resting metabolic rate, meaning that even wehn you're sitting at a desk or doing something sedentary your body is burning more calories just to keep your muscles ticking over. You also need to figure out what the best cardio is for you to do, and when the right time to do it is.

So, for weight loss, you can do the following to get optimal results from your efforts:
1) go for a long-ish low-intensity cardio workout first thing in the morning. Do it before breakfast, when your body is still catabolic so that you're burning calories from fat not muscle. But the key is low-intensity i.e. a brisk, 45 minute walk.
2) do your weight sessions in the first half of the day, ideally about 2-3 hours after eating a good, healthy low-fat high carb breakfast (surprise, surprise, the best being porridge). This will give you plenty of energy for your workout, plus you'll be raising your metabolism for the remainder of the day.
3) always do cardio after your weights. cardio uses up lots of your glycogen stores so doing it before weights leaves you with few energy reserves to lift heavily. Ideally split your cardio and weights to two separate sessions so you raise your emtabolism on two different occasions a day. Again, don't eat directly before a workout, but do get some good carbs and protein in about an hour afterwards.

Protein shakes are wonderful, they really are. In order to build that muscle you need, you need to start consuming about 1.2-1.8g of protein per kg of body weight (1.2-1.4g is fine for most women). Personally, I need to be consuming about 110g of protein a day. The average chicken breast contains about 50g of protein, and a tin of tuna has about 35-40g. I'll also get some from skimmed milk (about 8g per cup). But this still won't be enough, but to keep my fat and carb intake in check while still keeping my protein intake high I drink a whey shake straight after a workout which is readily absorbed and used directly by my body to repair the muscle tissue I've been breaking down. Protein is fab on so many levels, my favourite of which being that it actually costs your body more energy jsut to break it down, so purely by eating it, you're 'saving' calories- a gram of fat needs about 3-4 cals to get burnt, a gram of carbs, about 10 cals, and a gram of proten a whopping 20 calsories!! woohoo!!

So it's time for you to shake up your workout- that's a good thing! It means your body has adapted to your current program and you've gained the strength to go up a notch in terms of the workout. Now you have to start being really honest with yourelf about your diet and start to cut down, or cut out the cheats. Cheats are great from time to time to kick your metabolism out of starvation mode, but done to often and they're just excess calories. Oh, and cut out the carbs last thing at night, or certainly after about 7pm, it'll make a huge difference. If you want to eat last hing before bed, a yoghurt or even better, a whey shake with milk is the way to go.

Dragan

Where's your head at? (( my 2 cents on losing and regaining your motivation ))



Where's your head at?

We all discuss a huge amount about lifting techniques, cardio, diet, rep ranges, workout structure and supplements. But we never talk about the mental aspect of an exercise routine. As such, I would like to put out a little thread and hope it gets added to about people thoughts on the mental aspect of gym time and working out. Please feel free to add to my ramblings, lets face it, we all need to think about this just a little bit sometimes.

Honesty : If your not honest without yourself, you can't suceed. I had this conversation with some peers down the pub on Friday night. Being a little overweight, would I be getting anyway if I was telling myself I wasn't? Nope, not at all. But due to being honest with myself, my current status, my current work ethic the results are now starting to come into play. Don't cheat yourself. Don't tell yourself your form was good when it wasn't , that you ran 3 kilometers when you only ran 2.7 , that you rarely cheat on your diet when you do so on a regular basis. It's not helping you, it's only holding you back and moving your goals a little bit each time. Respect yourself and be honest to yourself.

What do you think about? : When your in the gym, what do you think about. Are you sitting on a bike, wondering about work, or clothes or your next meal. Are you doing through the motions on curls without even feeling the muscles working?? If so, once again you are robbing yourself. Remember, your giving up the time to go to the gym, so well done. Make sure you are getting everything you can out of it while you are there. Do your best to immerse yourself in your workout and you will learn more about yourself and your body each time you are in the gym.

I'm not in the mood to workout : Why not? Are you tired? Did you have a bad day? Why do you need to look at going to the gym as being a bad thing? Get to know some people, have a laugh with the staff, enjoy yourself and you will grow to love it. Sure, we all have days where we think about going home. But these are the true tests, go anyway, have a good workout and you know you will feel better. Getting healthy and in shape can't just be done on days when your feeling happy!

Are you getting what you need? : Not physically, but mentally. As I said in the previous part, there is no need not to enjoy what you are doing, or no reason you cannot find a physical activity that you do like! There are tons of clubs and adventure groups out there! Every been rock climbing or hill walking? Ever gone caving or scuba diving! Fitness didn't start in an air conditioned gym and it sure as hell doesn't end there!!!

Be there for yourself : Having recently gone through a tough time of having to make a choice between my personnal goals and my relationship it has become clear to me that the only person you can do anything for is yourself. Sure, sometimes you may be aiming at the wrong thing and be a little misdirected, but with the right frame of mind you will find not only where you are, but where you truly want to be. The only person you can go to the gym for is you. You cannot try and be something for somebody else. Of course, sometimes they can make a suggestion that you have never thought of!

Depression : Sometimes even the best of us suffers from a bad day, your goals seem to be further away than they were when you started, and everything seems to be going wrong. You hurt your elbow doing dips, and your housemate keeps eating chocolate cake in front of you and the bitch never puts on a pound, it's taken you longer than you thought to get that 100 kilo bench press. These things happen. Setbacks occur. Never forget, your greatest strenght in the gym is also your greatest weakness. Your are human. As such you have the potential to do the most amazing things, but it will never be easy. Keep your head up, don't break and guess what. You'll be one step closer to that goal.

babypink

g'em wrote:

Why not split your visits so theat each day you concentrate on a different body part?

amen! you'll feel the difference immediately and soon see the difference once you split the parts up. Splitting the body parts is the only way, in reality, to get gains in size and strength.

g'em wrote:

Protein shakes are wonderful, they really are.

they really really are! Protein and a good clean diet are the fuel for your gains. Get these right, together with a good split and you'll start noticing progress.

Think of the change in routine as a challenge, beat it and change again. Its never-ending and I find it to be a great motivator. Example: At the moment I've had to cut my training down to 3 days because of professional exams (not happy about it) but I know thats only going to be for another 5 weeks... really pushing myself now when i do train so I can lash back into it next month.

As for cheats....best part of the week

g'em

babypink wrote:

Splitting the body parts is the only way, in reality, to get gains in size and strength.

just to clarify... if you're a bloke you get big, if you're a girl you get bigger muscles only to a point. You'd still be slimmer (and exponentially more hot) than the way you'd look if you gained 10 kg of fat.

Babypink- you're just loving all that new-found size you're gaining

babypink

g'em wrote:

You'd still be slimmer (and exponentially more hot) than the way you'd look if you gained 10 kg of fat.

infinitely hotter of course...

Babypink- you're just loving all that new-found size you're gaining

true

justsomebloke

ok others might disagree with me here but I will give you my opinion that and you probably won't really like what i am going to say.

My advise would be only slightly change maybe your diet, some examples maybe the low fat yohurt as they have quite the amount of sugar and maybe add some more veg and vary the fruit you have (don't just have apples). But other then that i wouldn't try and make to many changes at the moment as you are generally a good routine at the moment. The reason i wouldn't change that much at the moment as you are heading into your finals you don't want to be putting on the added stress of not getting the the body you want to the stress of studying and your final year project if you have one. As in the next few months you may start to get a bit more stressed with the exmas coming up and you might not have the same amount of time to train as you do and you may start to snack more (try to keep ot healty).

I would suggest that you leave any big changes till after the exmas when you have more time to experiment with your routine and could be more active in general outside of the gym, also with more free time you will be able to control your diet as you can start to cook your own dinners (tell your mam it is for the best). That and what ever you do don't eat any of the food in the science canteen that stuff will kill you (well it did 5-6 years ago when i was there:D )

t-ha

g'em wrote:

legs: squats, squats, squats, squats, leg curls, leg extensions, and did I metnion squats (these are such effective exercises they could nearly be done on their own as the only leg exercise you do).

LOL - I went into the gym the other day and, for a laugh, just did 200 squats and left (I have a wierd sense of humour). Can't walk now...

g'em

t-ha wrote:

LOL - I went into the gym the other day and, for a laugh, just did 200 squats and left (I have a wierd sense of humour). Can't walk now...

whoah, 200? I normally do 120 and that kills me.. no, I tell a lie, its the lunging afterwards that really puts the nail in the coffin

LegacyUser

>> plus 1 hour cardio (30 min fast walk random incline heart rate between 140-150)

Push yourself more. Instead of a fast walk - try a jog. Each day you should be pushing yourself harder. In 30 mins you probably do only 2.5 to 3k.
Push for 3.5 next time - by upping the speed.

If you keep doing the same thing over and over again then your body gets used to it. Keep up the challenge.

Also, machines can be borning - get yourself to some of the classes too.That should motivate you.

g'em

bubby wrote:

Push yourself more. Instead of a fast walk - try a jog. Each day you should be pushing yourself harder. In 30 mins you probably do only 2.5 to 3k.
Push for 3.5 next time - by upping the speed.

to an extent yes, but for the purposes of weight loss it's better to keep the cardio low-moderate intensity and long.

LegacyUser

g'em wrote:

to an extent yes, but for the purposes of weight loss it's better to keep the cardio low-moderate intensity and long.

yeah - but you have to find a balance. If motivation is an issue, then boredom is obvious. Better to keep challenging yourself and keep motivated than "low-moderate intensity and long" which can be bloomin boring!
Keep yourself challenged. Once your body gets used to a particular set of instructions - a 30 minute walk will not be worth a thing

Cravez

I would consider loss of motivation also to do with energy levels. I find if im too tired to workout i feel " dont want to do this *sigh* ". Just try to somehow increase your energy levels: change diet, good sleep and maybe some natural substance like ginseng? If you feel energetic and can take on the world then you have no reason in my honest opinion to stop working out. Every session i go to i see improvement. I think as the others have said, change your diet, workout regime and as i said keep energy levels high and i bet you wont be able to leave that gym you will be enjoying it so much.

Good luck!

Cravez

RPGGAMER

amazingemmet wrote:

Can you post exactly what your doing and eating and your stats, seems like your program could do with a shake up. As for motivation try this if you don't stick with it you'll end up on that site.

that was a good one.:p took me by surprise

LegacyUser

Michael Cravez wrote:

I would consider loss of motivation also to do with energy levels. I find if im too tired to workout i feel " dont want to do this *sigh* ".

I totally agree. "I can't do this". That was me lastnight on the crosstrainer. For some reason the gym didn't appear to have the air contioning on and it made the workout really painful! I baled out on my third machine - becuase the heat was unbearable.

Seraphina

g'em wrote:

But if truth be told, plateaus are often not plateaus at all, but the weight loss slows down from dipping your hand once too often in the biscuit tin, or having an extra serving at dinner, or somewhere along the lines having maybe a little bit more food than you know you need to have.

i think this might be one of the problems, as i dont really know how much food i need to have. i'm struggling to deal with the added hunger the extra exercise is giving me, and dinner isn't filling me up as it used to. consequently my stomach rumbles while im studying and i go searching for something to munch on.

g'em wrote:

Can you honestly say you don't sleep better, have more endurance, see a difference in you skin, hair, nails? Do you not have a bit of a spring in your step and find it easier to run for a bus/ dance all night/ move around in general? Can you honestly say that you don't just.. well just 'feel' better?

unfortunately, no, but i think it may be a lot to do with a strong negative swing in moods due to my finals and distressing sleeping problems (i have to go to a specialist in the mater as apparently i may have narolepsy) so the lack of progress in weight loss is unfortunately adding to a pile of unpleasant things happening in my life right now

g'em wrote:

Oh and need I remind you that over on another forum you've been in the running for the 'Best Looking Bird on Boards' title??!?

that was a joke after i commented negatively about all the ladies patting eachother on the back etc. i dont even think any of those people have ever seen what i look like, i'm a far cry from best looking bird on boards, so unfortunately its not much reassurance

Seraphina

bubby wrote:

Push yourself more. Instead of a fast walk - try a jog. Each day you should be pushing yourself harder. In 30 mins you probably do only 2.5 to 3k.
Push for 3.5 next time - by upping the speed.

not quite! i'm a fast walker and i have a long stride. i can hit almost 4k in 30mins on a good day (without the incline!)

g'em

Seraphina wrote:

i think this might be one of the problems, as i dont really know how much food i need to have. i'm struggling to deal with the added hunger the extra exercise is giving me, and dinner isn't filling me up as it used to. consequently my stomach rumbles while im studying and i go searching for something to munch on.

well if you need help figuring out how much you need to eat on a daily basis I posted about that a while back.. here you go..

Seraphina wrote:

unfortunately, no, but i think it may be a lot to do with a strong negative swing in moods due to my finals and distressing sleeping problems (i have to go to a specialist in the mater as apparently i may have narolepsy) so the lack of progress in weight loss is unfortunately adding to a pile of unpleasant things happening in my life right now

oh you poor thing, I didn't realise you were in the middle of studying for your finals!!! Been there, bought the t-shirt, know exactly how you feel (except for the narcolepsy bit- that must be a bit weird to have to cope with ). In that case take it easy on yourself!! Now is not the time to add stress about your weight onto what is already a test of your metnal strength and endurance. Right now it's much more important to make sure you eat well, keep your body well-nourished, get plenty of rest, and I mean lots and lots and lots. Depriving yourself of the recuperation time your body and mind need is a sure-fire way to hinder success. I lecture to uni first years and already they're totally freaking out about exams. Its all I can do to not to tell them to chill out, the worst is yet to come in the next few years

For now try and put the whole weight loss issue to the back of your mind. Instead concetrate on exercising to keep your fitness levels going (healthy mind in a healthy body of course!!) and use it as a release from daily stresses. When you're on the treadmill or working out, stick in the ear phones and push all your negative thoughts away- allow yourself that hour or so to forget about everything else that's going on. Just enjoy the feeling of working up a sweat and knowing you're doing your body good. There'll be plenty of time to think about losing weight in a few months' time.