Am I a b*****?

LegacyUser

Long story short:

Girl from work is engaged whom I get on with like a house on fire, have slept with her a few times in last 2 months, we talk all day, text all the time and tell each other everything, huge chemistry but she lives with the fiance

Your 2 cents please...

Ag marbh

Yeah, you are to be honest. What would your reaction be to finding out your fiance was sleeping with another man? I'd probably go suicidal for a long period of time.

AngryBadger

yep. you are.

meditraitor

Ye- your a dickhead, and she's a slapper

ferdi

nope, dont be so hard on youself. she's the one with the commitments, your just playing the game. fair play to ye.

Oryx

What did you expect to be told? You already know your not doing a decent thing, are you hoping for approval or for someone to tell you to get the situation sorted? Well I will. If you want this girl she needs to choose you over her fiance. Not an easy choice. But the only decent one.

Peace

You wouldn't be asking if you didn't already know the answer.... whic is btw... YES YOU ARE A BO**OX.

Merrick

In short - yes. Yes you are.

bp

i think she is the worse for cheating but at you know she is with some one so you should back off! imagine it was your gf who was sleeping with another man?! how would you feel?

Peaadina

Hmmn, whereas what you are doing is FAR from right, you arent the one with the commitment.
She shoulders most of the blame, in terms of hurting her Fiance.
She shouldnt be engaged. If she wants to be free easy and single she should be, playing with someone else's happyness and feelings is wrong.
You should stay away from her for a while, she sounds like she doesnt know what she wants!:(

ferdi

yeah, if she does this to her betrothed, chances are you'll get burned in the future

drdre

you defintely are, just stay away from her and let her live her life with the fiance

iregk

In short yes you are. But she is no clean slate either. I personally wouldn't get involved in a situation like that as its just messy and I don't agree with it so shame on you. Shame on her for cheating on her Fiance and she deserves to get the boot.

dudara

this will end in just one way, tears!

You know damn well that she's in a committed relationship, and she really should look at herself and her morals.

Lux23

Yea you are sort of but there must be something wrong with her realtionship if she is sleeping with you.

LegacyUser

Definitely. And a very large one at that !

lu22

speaking from experiece here, just stay away from your one, there is nothing but bad going to come from this, if she is engaged to this guy and is sleeping with you.. who else is she sleepin with? and she obviously is going through a certain amount of sh*t in her head to be sleeping with you... if you really like her and fear being hurt just leave it!

Riesen_Meal

Get off your high horses people, of course he's a B**locks, but as Lux said, there must be something seriously wrong with the girls relationship if she's sleeping around.....

Did u know wen u first did the deed?

Femelade

yeah you are, but she's worse if that makes you feel any better...

Raskolnikov

Why is everyone quick to attack Mister F? It sounds to me like his relationship with this girl is more than sexual. Maybe he has deep feelings for her? If so, I don't think it makes him a basta*d for being with the girl.

AngryBadger

Raskolnikov wrote:

Why is everyone quick to attack Mister F? It sounds to me like his relationship with this girl is more than sexual. Maybe he has deep feelings for her? If so, I don't think it makes him a basta*d for being with the girl.

The fact that she's engaged to someone makes him a bastid, but hey, if he can live with that then no biggie.

Amazotheamazing

You're not too bad, she'd be sleeping around anyway. It'd be alot worse if you knew her fiance.

Sleepy

Get off the guy's case. Unless the fiancé is a friend of yours or you have a significant other yourself, she's the one betraying someone.

wes

You aren't doing the nicest thing in the world, but honestly if in the same situation I am not sure I wouldn't do it. Sure in the end she is the one with the commitment. So don't be so hard on yourself.

incisor71

The girl has a lot more to lose than what Mr. Fidelity does - I'm puzzled as to why she's playing with fire like this and putting her relationship/ engagement/future marriage at such serious risk.

Having said that, it takes two to tango. Perhaps they get some kind of dangerous buzz from living on the knife edge? If so, it'd be better for the OP to find some other source of a buzz, and get out before it becomes messy.

Loomis

Ye you are.Completely.
But not as much of a **** as she is.
Sorry but what exactly did you hope to ge tout of this?

kellxor.1337

Sleepy wrote:

Get off the guy's case. Unless the fiancé is a friend of yours or you have a significant other yourself, she's the one betraying someone.

He asked the board for there opinion, Yes you are a bo**ox, but yes she is worse, You should know better i suppose, Cant say i approve but hey,
Different Strokes for Different Folks



Kellxor

justsomebloke

as oppose to just calling you a B0ll0x straight off the bat, i'd like to ask what are your actual feeling for the girl would you like to be properly going out with her and want her to dump the finace, and have you asked her what she is looking for out of the relationship with you. Cause if you are looking for more then maybe you aren't a complete b0ll0x.

However if you are just in it for the no strings sex then yes, yes you are. She maybe worse as other people have said but she is not the one here looking to be judged

alfa147

Yeah ur abit of a dick mate and she sounds like a slapper.

End it Soon before you get ur head kicked in by you know who.

Tobias Greeshman

Ok the OP isn't the nicest person in the world, but he's by no means a b****** the girl is the one that deserves the bulk of the blame. She's the one in a relationship with her fiance and she's cheating on him. IMO I put most of the blame on the cheater not the cheatee.

The guys getting his hole and might be lacking a few morals but he's not the one cheating on anyone here.

Of all the guys in here that said the OP was a b******, I'd like to know how many of them would not be tempted like the OP was into sleeping with a work collegue.

tbh

I wouldn't call you a bas..... based on this one incident. If you generally do things like this, then yeah, you are. If you don't, but don't really care, and don't intend stopping, then yeah, you are. If you stop now, then you just did a ****ty thing once upon a time. Welcome to the club!

AngryBadger

Sleepy wrote:

Get off the guy's case. Unless the fiancé is a friend of yours or you have a significant other yourself, she's the one betraying someone.

He asked for opinions, and got 'em.

Tazz T

She might be having a last fling before settling down or there may be second thoughts after meeting someone who may or may not be a better match.

People make mistakes. Maybe she got engaged for the wrong reasons.

BoozyBabe

ferdi wrote:

nope, dont be so hard on youself. she's the one with the commitments, your just playing the game. fair play to ye.

I sort of agree with this.

She's the complete trollop who doesn't deserve her fiance & yes, you're not cheating on anyone, but you know she's spoken for so really you should walk away

(let it be someone else who's the cause of her breaking her fiance's heart)

muppetkiller

well yes you are and the only thing you can do to redeem yourself is by telling the Fiancé and saving this Poor Man from marrying a complete Wh£$% who will then divorce him in a year taking half his house and cash....

misswex

You know she is engaged, you know she is living with her fianceé and yet you continue to text and meet up with her. Thats not right at all, put yourself in the b/f shoes.

As for the girl, I honestly hope her b/f founds out what she is like before they marry.

LegacyUser

I appreciate everyones candor on this

I have feelings for her - I would never ever do something like under normal cicrumstances and she has never done this before and yes i too would brand someone a b****** until it happened to me.
Her relationship was already on the rocks
I dont regret what I am doing dont mean to sound like a coky so and so but yes it will end in tears no doubt about it and if they are mine then Im man enough to shed them

dudara

mister fidleity wrote:

I appreciate everyones candor on this

I have feelings for her - I would never ever do something like under normal cicrumstances and she has never done this before and yes i too would brand someone a b****** until it happened to me.
Her relationship was already on the rocks
I dont regret what I am doing dont mean to sound like a coky so and so but yes it will end in tears no doubt about it and if they are mine then Im man enough to shed them

If her relationship is indeed on the rocks, then you should stand clear of it until she sorts it. You two cannot have a worthwhile relationship while her fiance is involved. Relationships are for two people, not three. Shag*ing you is not going to fix her relationship

Tazz T

If her relationship is on the rocks, then why is she getting married?

ferdi

misswex wrote:

As for the girl, I honestly hope her b/f founds out what she is like before they marry.

agreed. OP, do all three of you a favour and tell this girl how it is - she can not marry this guy, its totally unfair. she obviously dosnt love him.

BoozyBabe

mister fidleity wrote:

I have feelings for her - I would never ever do something like under normal cicrumstances and she has never done this before and yes i too would brand someone a b****** until it happened to me.
Her relationship was already on the rocks
I dont regret what I am doing dont mean to sound like a coky so and so but yes it will end in tears no doubt about it and if they are mine then Im man enough to shed them

Yea, feelings of a boner!:rolleyes:

Seriously though, even if she does end the relationship with her fiance, you to start dating, she moves company or something like that & starts mentioning a new friend (male) of hers in conversations.

How would you ever be able to trust her?
You couldn't!! You'd constantly be thinking she's off screwing him.

Why waste your time on this piece of dirt?

ferdi

BoozyBabe wrote:

Yea, feelings of a boner!:rolleyes:

lol:D

muppetkiller

I have feelings for her - I would never ever do something like under normal cicrumstances and she has never done this before and yes i too would brand someone a b****** until it happened to me.

You trust she's never done this before eh , yet she still goes home to him at night and tells him she loves him doesn't she..trust eh..

Look the simple fact is if there relationship is on the rocks then stay clear..if it does end and he finds out she's been cheating on him with you ..You will be the reason they broke up in his eyes. So he'll probably go looking for payback.

As for her, When relationships are on the rocks you either work to fix them or you end them you don't go shaggin the nearest option to feel better about yourself...

anthony_086170

i disagree with loads on here

u aint doing anything wrong ur single i presume and she is engaged she should know better and ur just taking what your given

women like that never grow up and only person i feel sorry for is that fiancee he must be stupid or else blind

he is the one to get hurt as u already know the score as long as she's willing to put out keep taking it and if she dumps fiancee and wants to date you

give her the elbow at least u know what she's like and try not expect to much from her as if she doing it with you how many other men are on scene ?? and it could be done to you if u were with her she is good for 1 thing my friend so play hard

Oryx

muppetkiller wrote:

[
As for her, When relationships are on the rocks you either work to fix them or you end them you don't go shaggin the nearest option to feel better about yourself...

In a perfect world, maybe. Whatever this girls issues, O/P is now in some kind of relationship with her. Id say times come to figure out whether to keep it going as something bigger, or end the affair and get on with normal life. (Hence the post here) Big decision time....

Amazotheamazing

Can I be really cynical and suggest she wants her cake and eat it too? She might view this as a "harmless" fling before marriage, basically she's spoiled and selfish. How can the OP be sure the relationship is on the rocks? All we know is the girl can't be trusted and she's due to be married. 5 to 1 if the fiance was told, she'd just deny everything and marry the fiance anyway.

astro

no i dont think so, she's the one thats supposed to be loyal. you aint engaged to the guy.

^whitey^

Your a fupping baxtard!

0utshined

No you are not. She is in the relationship not you.

Do not start going out with her if it ends between her and her fiance though.

LegacyUser

man the oddest thing that i stumbled across this ...

i am the Fiancé

OP met my darling thru work... they started a their relationship in Sept - only 2 months after we bought our house and moved in together - the house we were going to spend the rest of our lives together in - raise our children in etc.

I saw all the signs but couldn't believe them - until they started going away for dirty w/ends together. Once in Dec once in Jan

Our relationship is well and truly over.

OP she's a good liar - she hasn't told you i know everything - fucgin mad.

i actualy believe she's a good person - just extremely fuc**ed up in the head- don't think she has any grasp on reality, living with the fairies. Mainly down to the broken family she comes from.

James you did me a big favour - thanks.

Heyes

you will only get hurt on this one