Take that, slam!

LovelyHurling

Ok before you move this thread to parenting please let me change your mind by insisting that a) that place is full of pamper dissing scary mommas, no place for a university student and b) it affects everyone not just mothers. oh and fathers.

Question is: were you slapped/ spanked/ smacked as a kid and do you think it affected your personality today, or would you have turned out differently had your parents chosen other methods of punishment?

Cos I reckon the government's idea of bringing in a smacking ban is completely mad and over the top. I was smacked, not "beaten" or "hit" by the odd couple, and i reckon i wouldnt be the *ahem* well behaved and *cough* nice *something stuck in my throat* respectable boy that i am today without it. I really think that if old julie and dick tried to talk me into good behaviour verbally, i would have been a complete crash of a child and would now look something like this

WHAT IF THEY HADNT SMACKED ME?

I must admit, that if all goes horribly wrong and the johnny slips, im not sure i would want to punish my own kids in this way... but id like to have the choice, at least

I think if the parents do a good job from go, it shouldn't be necessary. And yes I'm aware I've never had kids. But I was never smacked and I'm just an angel

I think a ban might be over the top, but if it's because they can't deal legally with cases of smacking seriously gone too far, maybe it's necessary.
I don't know, some kids seem to think they can get away with everything, but I'd say that's due to a lot more factors.

Atrocity

Question is: were you slapped/ spanked/ smacked as a kid and do you think it affected your personality today, or would you have turned out differently had your parents chosen other methods of punishment?

yes, a tiny bit. I don't see anything wrong with a small slap on the behind when the child is misbehaving.

Scraggs

totally agree wit ya LH, i was slapped as a child and i'm a fairly normal, wellbehaved, respectful and decent person. my sis on the other hand was never slapped and threw crazy assed tantrums [still does to this day] and now shes totally wild with so respect for anyone [shes 17]. i think slapping lightly and in moderation is an effective discipline method. if i have kids [and if its legal] i would spank them if they were bold as a last resort

bounty_hunter

There's a similar thread here if it interests you.
http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=311951&highlight=spanking

LovelyHurling

Oh right, this has actually been discussed to death... sorry about that!

Cake Fiend

I'm not qualified to say for certain whether slapping is appropriate/harmful or not (I wouldn't be surprised if whoever called for this ban is either tbh), but my opinion is that a few well-meaning slaps never did anyone any harm. And child abuse will happen regardless of the legality of slapping a child, so I'm not sure I see the point in this ban. It won't cut down on the number of abused children, but it'll probably mean we have more uncontrollable brats around.

Azureus

its fine as long as it doesnt become part of an everyday thing! i got smacked when i really misbehaved, very rarely-once i can remember and maybe another once or twice that i dont but it wasnt a regular thing.
my brother who used to scream 'thats abuse ill call the guards' if my parents so much as grabbed his arm, is a bit out of control whereas i would have a lot of respaect for authority etc. it doesnt have a negative effect, provided its not full on abuse which a smack isnt!) its just strict disipline!
a smacking ban is just taking childrens rights a little too far.

Agent Smith

i got the living shíte slapped out of me when i was younger, and i deserved it....


a ban is poinless tbh

koolkat

kids today have absolutely no respect for anyone or anything. i was given the odd slap when i was younger and it hasn't done me any harm. i don't think it should be outlawed. i don't however agree with slapping a child across the face or punching them.

Dont Ban Me

I was given the odd slap and smack as a kid and although you dont agree at the time, its does you no harm. I feel so old saying this but kids these days have no barriers or limits becuase they know nothing is going to happen them when they cross the line!!

A good 2x4 across the forehead would sort em all out!

Sometimes parents have issues themselves they could have been abused themselves as children !
I found some disturbing stuff out when I was older which explained my mothers actions towards my me and my siblings but what she witnessed and went through, it didn't stop the way my mother had treated me

we hardly get along now as much as I try and have tried, she's not a nice person and ive hardly any respect for her

now my worst fear is to turn into my mother

I think hitting a child is unacceptable in any case, theres always a way around it

Tha Gopher

Mah dadday smacked my ass, never did me any harm (well, apart from at the time)


Re the smacking, quite frankly a great many parents today are retarded. Ive noticed in recent years that people dont discipline their kids like when I was young. I was in the bank the other day, and this young fella, bout 18 months, was runnin around causin havoc. Ive no problem with kids runnin about, if the mother keeps an eye on them its a good laugh for the kid, she should just be sure hes not going to damage anything/injure himself.

This kid however, he was tipping all the leaflets out of their stands and running around a large heavy sign that, if he managed to topple it, could kill or seriously injure him if the wrong part of it caught his head. All the while this is going on his moter is at the desk conducting her bank business, turning around about once every 40 seconds to make sure he was there. The kid went out of her eyesight several times, anything could happen or he couldve been taken. And all the while Im thinking "if something happens to him, she will blame/sue the bank" :rolleyes: I dont find this kind of thing with skangery types, rather its the wealthier no smacking enthusiasts who are letting their kids run riot.

As for me, I could smack a son, dunno if i could bring myself to smack a daughter.
We`ll wait and see Seems to be the way in most families- the son gets smacked, the daughter just has to deal with 17 years of the threat of a slap that will never be enforced.

hepcat

Smacking ban = well meaning pc idiocy.

the human race has been aroud for some time now, and children who cannot be reasoned with have been smacked as a method of discipline or deterring them from doing something crazy. This has not been proved to have done any harm (and we are not talking about punching/beating/hitting or hurting in excessive way which does do a lot of harm). Only in recent times has the behavoiur of children and teenagers become a problem, abd a lot of people argue rightly that parents bear a lot of responsibilty ofr the behavoiur of their kids. Where smacking falls into this, I don't know. But i think a reasoned debate, where we can recognise what a smack is, and still acknowledge that excessive corporal punishment os totally unacceptable, would be better.

panda100

Dont Ban Me wrote:

I was given the odd slap and smack as a kid and although you dont agree at the time, its does you no harm. I feel so old saying this but kids these days have no barriers or limits becuase they know nothing is going to happen them when they cross the line!!

A good 2x4 across the forehead would sort em all out!

I agree with this.I too was given the odd slap if i was bold or id done something stupid.Looking back there was never any malice in my mum and dad giving me a slap cos it did stop me from doing naughty things again. I reckon kids today just have no sense of barriers or limits and are quite literally getting away with murder .I would be dead against this slapping ban.

LegacyUser

Yeah, I got a few slaps as a kid.
Nothing major, and nothing 'damaging'.

Have you watched Nanny 911, and Super Nanny?

I honestly believe a change in diet and a quick slap now and then would put a stop to those childrens behaviour quick enough.

If I have children, and they spit at me/pulled my hair/cursed/screamed at me etc, I can tell you now that a slap would definately be the order of the day.

Canis Lupus

I think a ban is a joke. How will it stop parents smacking their kids.

On the same note tho I was smacked as a child, chased after with my mom holding a slipper, wooden spoon etc. Me and my brothers look back and have some of the best laughs when we recall these moments cos they were funny.

Thing is, do I think that smacking made me a decent person? I dunno. I don't hold it against my parents and I would smack my own kids did I have any but I do think parenting is just as important. My mom and dads disapproval was often more intimidating than a smack but both worked equally well..... Perhaps a smack made me work harder at not being caught rather than as discouragement....

Being a bit judgemental take for example yur atypical skanger family, I have seen plenty of kids getting the hell knocked out of them by their mudders but I'm fairly confident most of them will grow up to be ****heads who will in turn spawn another generation. Why doesn't smacking affect these kids if it's argued that smacking is a viable way to teach right and wrong?

hepcat

Canis Lupus wrote:

I think a ban is a joke. How will it stop parents smacking their kids.

On the same note tho I was smacked as a child, chased after with my mom holding a slipper, wooden spoon etc. Me and my brothers look back and have some of the best laughs when we recall these moments cos they were funny.

Thing is, do I think that smacking made me a decent person? I dunno. I don't hold it against my parents and I would smack my own kids did I have any but I do think parenting is just as important. My mom and dads disapproval was often more intimidating than a smack but both worked equally well..... Perhaps a smack made me work harder at not being caught rather than as discouragement....

Being a bit judgemental take for example yur atypical skanger family, I have seen plenty of kids getting the hell knocked out of them by their mudders but I'm fairly confident most of them will grow up to be ****heads who will in turn spawn another generation. Why doesn't smacking affect these kids if it's argued that smacking is a viable way to teach right and wrong?

Think you make a valid point Canis Lupus - parenting is what it is about, and the smacking issue is largely irrelevant. It's a different world nowadays, and a lot of parnets simply do not have the same amou8nt of time for their kids and are stressed out to bits on top of that. Redressing the balance in favout of quality of life would, imo, have the biggest impact on the behaviour of kids and would obviate the need for any ban on smacking

Siogfinsceal

dont approve of beating kids but the odd slap doesnt do any harm. Im so sick iof seeing spoilt, badly behaved kids everywhere. The thing is its a psychological thing. If you punish a kid just once for something they will not do it again if they know that they will definately be punished for misbehaving, they wont misbehave and you wont actually have to punish them. The problem occurs where the kid knows that the threat is not real ie they will not really be punished for doing something so they happily do what they want

StupidLikeAFox

Couldnt understand why this thread was called "Take that, islam!" there for a second

Chrissy

Definitely don't think there's anything wrong with smacking a child if they misbehave, but I only mean a smack.

Yes, I ws smacked & I don't think it did me any harm whatsoever.
I knew how to behave & have manners, which an awful lot of kids don't seem to have these days.
Can't help but think it's all part of this PC bullsh!t, "Now Johnny, that wasn't very nice, go sit on the bottom step of the stairs until you're sorry, & if your don't, well, I'm not going to do anything actually"
Oh please!!!!!

hullaballoo

All I know is that something fcuked me up.

I think an effective punishment would be making them stand on one leg holding up something heavy. Seriously.

Canis Lupus

bluewolf wrote:

I think an effective punishment would be making them stand on one leg holding up something heavy. Seriously.

On a pole in a tank filled with sharks with frikkin laser beams on their heads.

ClareBear

I was never smacked and I never would smack a child, I think there's better ways around things.

LovelyHurling

I dont know if there are better way around things, I think there are more difficult ways around things although they may be just as good. But if its easy, it works as well as anything else, and nobody gets hurt then I'd say smacking is very acceptable.

Have to say I have a few mates that are brothers, who werent smacked as kids, they're all completely sound and I think I turned out reasonable enough as well even though my parents chose slapping, so I reckon not smacking kids is fine as long as there's real and effective discipline of some sort. Of course parents have to be able to dish out that non-corporal discipline just as sharply as any other kind, its no good apologizing to someone if the kids knows its just an empty formula before he runs along again.
And regardless whether you slap or not, I think parents leading by good example is the best way of rearing a child that there is.

Oh and I have to agree with the guy who said that you look back on your parents slapping you with laughter, thats deffo true. My folks didnt smack us in public which I think is bad for the child, kind of humilitating. But if we were bold in the street or whatever my ma used to just smile at us in an evil kind of way... jesus thinking about it that look still gives me the heebie jeebies

ClareBear

LovelyHurling wrote:

But if we were bold in the street or whatever my ma used to just smile at us in an evil kind of way... jesus thinking about it that look still gives me the heebie jeebies

The "Wait til I get you home" trick...never failed. I wasn't smacked but I got a few tellings off in my time. Smacking children in public is a definite no no anyway, not only does it humiliate the kid but you can see passers by feeling awkward about it too.

Siogfinsceal

it doesnt exectly have to be slapping. Once a kid knows that they will be punished for misbehaving, they have limits and are more likely to behave. Instead of slapping you can take away priviledges I think that works quite as well. When I was younger I got grounded if I misbehaved and my mam always carried it through so I learnt to respect their wishes and behave. Lots of kids nowdays have no limits at all there is no concept of punishment of any form

Canis Lupus

LovelyHurling wrote:

Oh and I have to agree with the guy who said that you look back on your parents slapping you with laughter, thats deffo true. My folks didnt smack us in public which I think is bad for the child, kind of humilitating. But if we were bold in the street or whatever my ma used to just smile at us in an evil kind of way... jesus thinking about it that look still gives me the heebie jeebies

Mother muttering "Wait till I get you back home" mean anything to ya

ST*

Tbh, kids can be cheeky little bas.tards.
The no smack ban would be thrown in the face of parents
anytime they said no to the child about something.

Smack yes, hit or anything more severe no.
My parents gave me a 'scutch' in the arse for getting up
to no good. I'm glad they did, kept me in line to some extent :rolleyes:

Ph3n0m

I was smacked as a child when I was bold (I did some incredibly bold and naughty things).

However as a parent, I cant (off hand) think of one incidence where I have slapped my daughter - however that said, I can think of anything she has done to deserve one

Some children do need to be slapped or atleast taught to respect their elders and other people

Somnus

There's nothing wrong with it as long as it's not taken too far.

One of my friends didnt get one drop of disipline from his parents and to be honest he can be such a di**head sometimes