Game Industry developments in 2006

ambro25

As the title says, what do you reckon, by this time next year?

My predictions -

360 is revealed as an XB with a graphics card upgrade, but still manages to put the final nail in Sony's market hegemony. M$ record their first ever console division profit, at $1 and 58 cents - but hey, it's in the green!

Revolution is revealed as a GC on steroids - Shells can now be launched in Mario Kart eye-toy-like and adult software with whips makes its appearance on a Nintendo platform, but the dang thing still doesn't play DVDs.

PS3 performance is revealed as a PS2 with an extra Cell CPU, and FIFA 2008, Burnout 5, Splinter Cell:Hide & Spy and MGS:The Three Sisters each consecutively break all game software sales records.

The Army is called in to maintain the peace in advance of the expected Xmas 2006 rush to buy the latest Rockstar offering - GTA:Streets of Tallaght

A botched PSP firmware upgrade kills Sony's portable upon running, SONY loses $bn in the US after class action suits, and then worldwide with replacing millions of consoles bought @ Xmas 2005 under warranty.

A quiet joint-venture between ARM and ATI make a breakthrough in portable graphics solution, providing hardware accelerators offering DirectX9c-grade graphics for mobile devices with microscopical energy requirements. Nintendo rumoured to be first licensee for their Gameboy Advance Further®, PC-grade Battlefield 2 adaptation rumoured as first AAA title.

Myiamoto is knighted, Molyneux is abducted, Trip Hawkins resurfaces from the ashes of the Phantom, with a new "4EP" universal console format. The word on the street for 4EP is format convergence, with a slot each for SMS, NES, MD, SNES, AES, N64 carts, an optical drive each for PS, PS2, CDi, 3DO, XB, 360, GC, Revolution and PC games, and 4 patent-pending unifit® (universal-fit) game pad ports, each of which can accomodate an original pad of any of the above consoles. Retroheads, gadget-freaks and all-round committed gamers foam at the mouth, but fears arise as the design for the unit is rumoured to be by Bosch or AGA.

madrab

nice, but you forgot about:
duke nukem forever being delayed til E3 2007,
developers giving up on prey,
ea taking control of the holy land,
jack thompson suing the developers of tetris for inciting communism,
uwe boll making movies of metal gear solid, zelda, sonic, & a sequel to alone in the dark
john romero leaving several companies before finally taking up the role as head designer for ea with its first title to be diakatana 2007

ambro25

madrab wrote:

nice, but you forgot about:etc

Ah-yeah-but... ... I've only got a small crystal ball, not the family bucket version

monument

Every one grows up or ‘gets a life’ and stops playing games, industry dies

Tusky

EA buy Nintendo, sony & microsoft and merge them all into one console that only plays EA sequels. No original games allowed.

Gizmondo begins to cause cancer.

madrab

microsoft do a survey & realise their controller for the 360 is too small, so re-commission the B controller

Jazzy

streets of tallaght will be awesome. cant wait to hear the lads on the street, "schweeeahh, startin'?" and of course the lead character is called Anto and his bird, jacinta'

I predict Peter Molyneaux talking more crap then ever and having wonderful ideas which he implements poorly.

also the announcement of the Sega Megasaturncast System to be met with glee

yawnstretch

Lol at Streets of Tallaght

ambro25

Nokia acquires Gizmondo (Gizmondo), Tapwave (Zodiac) and Gamepark Industry (GP32, GP2X) IP on the cheap and quiet, and has another crack at it.

Having smacked SONY one in the mouth with 360, Microsoft readies the other first and, surprising everybody and their dogs, announces that they will release a portable console by Xmas 2007, codename Y-Fronts.

Jakks Pacific releases an AES version of their TV plug-in product, a full-size AES stick containing a dozen of the best-known Neo Geo titles, including Metal Slug, Puzzle Bobble, Fatal Fury and Samurai Showdown.

GTA:Streets of Tallaght attracts, again surprisingly enough, Jack Thompson's vengeful scorn and enough media coverage for Dublin to eventually bootstrap the Irish videogame industry, where the next big-selling genre across all platforms is invented. Needless to say, the game reaches summums of gore and violence, and the success for it which JT caused leads him to end his futile media-grabbing antics with a fairly bad rendition of Spiderman/Superman superpowers, when he jumps from the top of the Needle...

Zapp Brannigan

Tusky wrote:

Gizmondo begins to cause cancer.

lol :v:

Rhyme

Nintendo takes over everything non-innovative is punishable by death by pastel colours

johnny_ultimate

Nintendoduck-billed-platypus proves less successful than forecasted.
Players on XBox live use the word 'retard' and it's derivitaves approximately 7 trillion times in the entire year.

Laguna

Tusky wrote:

Gizmondo begins to cause cancer.

That's ****ing sick, do you know anyone with cancer?, if you did you wouldn't joke about it.

Dont be at yourself

EA release FIFA 07, NHL 07, NBA 07 and Madden 07.

Maybe.

ambro25

Laguna wrote:

That's ****ing sick, do you know anyone with cancer?, if you did you wouldn't joke about it.

Lighten up - this is a light-hearted thread and posts are supposed to be taken as 2nd or even 3rd degree...

madrab

with ambro on this, its just a light hearted thread, no offence intended

peter molyneaux's hype machine goes into overdirve about their new game where you get to play as an army engineer, performing deadly challenges to say lives, or kill them, the choice is yours - turns out to be a copy of minesweeper

sprinkles

Poeple realise that a "real" dog can do more things than their Nintendogs.

After finally shaking the addiction og FM2006 SI go and release FM2007...b*stards

NekkidBibleMan wrote:

EA release FIFA 07, NHL 07, NBA 07 and Madden 07.

Maybe.

You forgot Road after World cup 06 and Preseason Training 07

FranchisePlayer

I agree with Laguna it is not funny to joke about cancer.If you did know a close friend or a relative who had it you would not laugh about.So keep your inconsedirate comments to yourself.

sprinkles

Its inconciderate to make jokes about Princess Di and the War but gods knows they tend to be the funniest ones...

Lighten up, he's not going out to give anyone cancer and I'm sure no one here means any harm to those who suffer with it.

(To understand the above you may require a sence of humour)

Tusky

Sorry if offence was caused, none intended. If we stopped making jokes about things that offended others, life would get pretty boring.

madrab

Sims 2: bowel movement gets releases, with actual realistic bowel movements including many favourites: constipation, diarrhea, machine gun, & many more

ambro25

An affordable consumer VR headset is released for PC, patches come out for BF2, LFS2, GTR and GTL. The headset solves motion sickness, sales of CRTs, LCDs and TFTs plummet. 4-players gaming in full screen with a single gaming platform slowly but surely revolutionises home entertainment. Paradoxically, Eye Toy antics pale in comparison to players falling off their chairs or settees in the middle of severe VR dogfights.

Garments incorporating wearable wireless gaming controllers are being test-marketed, proving highly successful with Sony's PSP, M$' Y-Fronts and Ninty's Gameboy Advance Further® portable consoles. Changing rooms redefine videgame retail space, and limited editions by Versace and Chanel reach auction records on eBay by Xmas 2006.

Ninty releases Nintendogs 2, the game is bundled with a tail-wagging cart for the DS's GBA slot.

mewso

FranchisePlayer wrote:

I agree with Laguna it is not funny to joke about cancer.If you did know a close friend or a relative who had it you would not laugh about.So keep your inconsedirate comments to yourself.

I suggest you cancel your membership of boards if this is going to offend you. Much worse lies deeper and you won't be able to resist it.

ShiverinEskimo

Laguna wrote:

That's ****ing sick, do you know anyone with cancer?, if you did you wouldn't joke about it.

Take it easy. I'm sure he meant no disrespect to anyone with cancer - its not like he had a go at anyone with cancer...We all know cancer is bad but just like the million jokes about HIV and other deadly diseases they are only that - jokes. No one is wishing anything on anyone here.

zAbbo

gizmondo to cause ball cancer

ambro25

You eeevil one, you - ROFLMAO

madrab

cancer to cause you buyin an n-gage

sprinkles

madrab wrote:

cancer to cause you buyin an n-gage

Ngage to cause you buying cancer....I like this game

madrab

games to cause you buying n-gage cancer .... think that one was a bit thin

feckidyparp

God I was so tempted to say this thread gave me eyeball cancer. So damn tempted. but of course I wouldn't say anything like that. oh no not me.