Excuses!

UnrealQueen

My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

Dear School: Excuses. Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.

Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wear.

Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.

Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.

Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.

Please excuse Bob from school from Sep. 1 - Nov. 1, he had to attend a religious sacrificial giving ceremony on Indian grounds.

Please excuse my son from school yesterday, he has gangrene and cock itch.

I'm sorry but my baby sitter flushed my homework down the toilet.

I'm sorry Tyler can't go to school today because his hormones are raging.

I'm sorry I can't come to school today because I have toemonia!

Oh, sorry [teachers name], the cafeteria food made me delirious.

Al was not in school yesterday because he was didn't feel like going.

I was late for class because the bell rang before I got here!!

I won't be in class because my dog chipped my tooth.

I was absent because I got my head caught in the power window of the car.

My dog has mistaken my homework for that GOSH DAMN newspaper.

My sister ate it... (I don't really recommend you to use it.)

I got mugged on the way to school and they took my Bag with the homework
in it.

My baby brother threw up on my home work.

I got stuck in the elevator.

My mom forgot to wake me up.

Didn't You feel The Earthquake?

My mom put my homework in the washer.

Sorry I was late; the bell rang before I got here

Mom ate it, she's heavily pregnant and having very odd cravings

"I was going to go to school today, but my doctor recommended not doing
anything that causes me stress."

I’m tardy because I am protesting against the nature of clocks.

Dear <teacher's name>, Seth will not coming to school because of your ugly
face, your bucked teeth, and your smelly farts. That is all. <Parent’s name>

I'm sorry, but I can't turn in my homework because my cat threw up on it. Want to see?

Please excuse bob from school today as constipation has made him uptight.

I ate my homework because I didn't have any ice cream, but it had all the answers on it so it made me smarter.

Crash

...

Dot dot dot.

i say dot dot dot to emphasise my current bemusement.

i also add this.

ooh and one of these too :eek:

i think my work here is done.





ps - i'm basically saying that these are ****e.

November Golf

UnrealQueen wrote: »

My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

Execute him! Bit harsh 😂