UOCredits.dat file.

Hobbes

It's a file in UO that has some intresting comments. Thought I'd paste the best ones here.

Here is some of the good stuff,

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! defaultcolor #00FF00
"I want to be a 25 year old girl with a sugar daddy."
-TSchubert

"I'm a frikkin' retard."
-KBlack UOHoc 7/15/99

"I'm not arguing either way, I'm just telling you how it is."
-KBlack, on Archery

"Someone broke my Winger tape..."
-KBlack, lunch

"Well, I have no clue how to deal with this..."
-KBlack, Lead Programmer

"I don't want to hear that from the lead programmer."
-TBailey, Lead Designer

"Kenny's like what evil would be if it came to have breakfast with you."
-BDubose

"I hope you came up with lots of good excuses."
-BCrowder

"It's all Christmasy....with breasts."
-ACastoro

"See, it's like if you have a million monkeys, and they have a million
typewriters...That's an invention."
-DRubenfield

"I'm not copying, I'm a conformist."
-KBlack

"It's like giving monkeys hand grenades..."
-DRubenfield

"If I have nutrasweet I pee in my pants and forget my name."
-BDalton

"Server load is a lot less of an issue when there's cash invovled."
-BDalton

"Why'd that happen?...Doesn't matter."
-DRubenfield

"It doesn't matter, it's just a server."
-KBLack, totally out of context

! color #FFFF00
PSage: "It's like Schroeddinger's cat."
DRubenfield: "Dude, it's like strapping a piece of buttered toast
to a cat's back." "Whoa, you could do that with just two
pieces of toast!" "Whoa, you could do that with ONE piece of toast!"
! color #FFFF00
TBailey(laughing): "I was wondering if you'd figure that out."
DR: "Dude, I should be a physicist! I could be standing there
with toast and butter and people would say 'what are you doing?'
I'd say, 'Dude, I'm building a spaceship!'"

"I am a headshot God!"
-ACastoro

"Guns don't kill zombies, people kill zombies."
-RWilkins

"They teach you italian in the bathroom."
-KSaffel

"Wow, everything has been running well lately."
- Jason

"Don't say that, you'll jinx it!"
- Mark R.

1 hour later: "You jinxed it."
- Mark R.

"Time has stopped. No, really, time stops every 49 days."
- Rick

"Why is it that the first thing the people in charge do to the
credits is move their names to the top?"
- Unknown

"Who cast An Tym?"
- Various people

"It's fixed. Time won't stop for another 280 million years now."
- Rick

"Guess Russ will need to test for 280 million years to verify it."
- Rick

"Um, Santas are taking over the world."
- frantic GM calling Jason over the holidays

As we wonder why apparent creature population keeps falling:
"Half of the creatures in the world are inside of stablemasters!"
- Ragnar

"Must be crowded in there."
- Unknown

"Why is the stablemaster shooting fireballs?"
"There must be a dragon inside of him!"
- Unknown


"Rick's in there hacking at roofs."
- Raph

"That's BACKSLASH, Unix boy!"
- Jim Greer, seeing Raph trying to type a DOS pathname.

"I didn't touch your tree!"
- Kristen

"It would look like: WHACK, WHACK-WHACK,
WHACK, WHACK-WHACK, WHACK."
-Andrew

"Oh! What are you working on now -- reproduction?"
- Raph

"I'm gonna go make some ham for the wolves to eat."
- Raph

"I like the dirty rectangle."
- Scott

"No problem. For the server, we'll just
slap on a couple more gigs."
- Scott

"So, does Scott come before Edmond or Rick?"
- Kristen

"Just don't water my snake."
- Rick

"You ain't gonna like this woman with his arms on her."
- Micael

"We're striving for your magic, and I'm going to
come and rub your head everyday until we get it."
- Andrew to Scott, who wasn't having trouble getting
things to work.

"You could try rubbing network cables."
- Rick to Andrew, in response to above.

"If it's easier to get it up without going through the paperdoll...."
- Jeff

"I made a penguin once."
- Scott

"Add some... splotches of cool texture stuff."
- Scott

"Now you're playing with bars again."
- Scott

"Eeeewwww, he bit the duck's butt off!"
- Raph and Kristen

"No! I bit the duck's head off -- far less gross!
Well, less gross."
- Andrew

"Oh, there's the better corpse."
- Raph

"I'm sorry, Marsh, I didn't mean to hit you in the
privies with Raph's shaft."
- Andrew

"I like destroying pictures."
- Scott

"I look at that and I don't see Lord British... I see a cool guy."
- Scott

"I am Greenhead of the Buck Naked tribe."
- Marshall

"We saw Todd's corpse with his legs wrapped around a lamppost...
it looked all weird...."
- Kristen

"Hang on a second -- I need to look at this pair of breasts first."
- Andrew

"There's a fifty-fifty chance if there's enough
meat you can assemble a baker out of it."
- Raph

"This looks like Doom."
- Todd, upon viewing Duke Nukem for the first time.

"Yes, but this one has nekkid chicks."
- Marshall

"Don't love it -- you could get it sticky."
- Raph

"Just think -- a marble bear is better than a marble mongbat."
- Todd

"In addition to this, they are spending money to be dead."
- Kristen, on why ghosts shouldn't have to be bored.

"She licked it all over and stuck it on there."
- David

"Oh, could I have a pet waitress?"
- Scott

"Let them eat tables."
- Mark R.

"I don't like units on girls."
- Starr

"I, too, used to be someone women respected."
- Kevin

"I'm wearing trolls."
- Scott

"There's a chicken running rampant through Nujel'm right now."
- Todd

"You've got a little ding-ding that goes off."
- Kevin

"I was heartbroken for three days after
I accidentally mowed over my Chewbacca."
- Scott

"I'm just gonna have you rebuild the world after this meeting."
- Starr

"Marsh hurt his hand in a CLAPPING accident??"
- the rest of the team,
when Marsh showed up with a bandage on his hand

"So we make man-eating apple trees and the apples will show up?"
- Joye

"I guess I was hoping there wouldn't BE any bugs."
- Ragnar

"This game is like, perfect for multiplayer stuff."
- Gary Scott Smith

After Ragnar ate some dried mealworms with spice:
"No thanks, I'm at a sociological stage of development
where I don't NEED to eat bugs anymore."
- Dan

After Mark admitted to eating two as well:
"It' a good thing they're not alive."
- Kevin

"Yeah, they'd breed in your stomach."
- Brian

"I'll only be having one piece of this delicious looking
cake that someone very kindly left in my office, (along
with a great deal of glitter which I will not eat).
Have some cake, it's better than mealworms!"
- Brian on his birthday.

"Can we change the perspective?"
- marketing guy, mere weeks from beta

"'Twas the day before beta,
And all through the code
Not a damn thing was working...
Not even god mode."
- several programmers, improvising at lunch

"What kind of meat do human corpses produce?" --
"No seriously, this is a serious gameplay issue!"
- Starr to Gary

"The rest of my scheduled tasks are meaningless."
- Gary Scott Smith

"Quality takes time."
- Mr. Mike.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah."
- Richard Garriott

"Well, you pulled it out and handed it to her!"
- Chucky Z. to Ragnar

"And she initialed it!"
- Ragnar in response

"My actual title is Reverend Mother."
- Mark F.

"You should spell that 'mutha.'"
- Micael

"I must take this opportunity to state that I have
recently noticed some people in this production
group, who shall remain nameless, using the word
"insure" to mean "ensure". The couth Originite
correctly identifies the word "insure" as a verb
meaning "to give insurance to" and the word "ensure"
as a verb meaning "to make sure". The next time
you use the phrase "I will insure that this work gets
done on time" in my presence, I shall consider this a
legal and binding insurance contract and will demand
payment when the work is not, in fact, completed on time."
- Jeff Wofford, being pedantic.

"Jennifer went home--she was laying eggs around the building all morning."
- Raph, after Jen did Easter activities all day

"We should get sponsored by Dr. Pepper."
- Rick

"I will not have my baby three weeks early."
- appeared on the whiteboard after Joye did,
severely messing up the schedules

"50,000 cigarettes were smoked in the making of Ultima Online."
- our best guess

"You shouldn't give a marketing guy the controls."
- Alex Carloss, VP of Marketing, discussing demos

"It was society's ills that made me place these tiles
wrong! It's not my fault!"
- Kevin

"If we don't think there are enough dragons in the mix
we just tweak the dragon generator dial on our server
side and more dragons appear in the game."
- Starr Long - Gamespot Interview

"How come I haven't seen the Dragon Generator Dial yet?"
- Chuck Crist

"You haven't made the art for it yet? Oh no! The whole system is gonna break down!!"
- Raph

"The resource system works a little too well. There was this huge
mob of female bards clumped around me. And I ran, and they all
followed me! Naked chicks, mind you! So I had to kill them all."
- Scott

"It's such a happy song to butcher people by."
- Chuck Crist

"There's horses raining from the sky! What do we do about it?"
- Mike McShaffry

"You know, that code makes absolutely no sense to me."
- Todd, watching over Rick's shoulder

"Right now, it's not making much sense to me either.
And I just got done writing it fifteen minutes ago."
- Rick (after several all-nighters at work)

"I think there's a bug. I was fighting a dragon,
when suddenly he turned around, flew away, turned
into an air elemental, and exploded."
- Rick

"Oooo, I want to put on a dress!"
- Scott Phillips

"I need nothing in particular."
- an NPC when asked what they would like

"If you bring me some nothing in particular, that'd be nice."
- the same NPC, asked a little bit later

"Dammit, I don't think I've got a quote yet. I've got to say something funny soon."
- Jason

GreenHell

nice one