bad lyrics

Smurfpiss

Was listening to ash today. I love the band but in one of their songs (warmer than fire) one of the lyrics is "she took off her t-shirt like a worm might eat dirt"

Now i think thats just terrible...i mean pure bloody awful, for such a cool band to have such a bad lyric!

So this thread is for all those people who wanna post up terrible lyrics by otherwise great bands! best post wins a smelly sock!

Creature

The lyrics for Elevation by U2 are fairly atrocious:

-A mole
Digging in a hole
Digging up my soul now
Going down, excavation-

-A star
Lit up like a cigar
Strung out like a guitar
Maybe you can educate my mind-


Makes me want to cry, really it does.

Wir_Sind_Helden

Yeah, I'd like to nomanate most of U2's stuff....

Worse lyrics of all time are -

"Wir können alles schaffen genau wie die toll dressierten Affen wir, müssen nur wollen"

which means

"We can have everything to create exactly like the madly trained apes, we only want"

Gumps probably gonna correct me on this..

memaeve

It's more like we can achieve everything exactly like the great trained apes, we just have to want to.

I can't reallly think of any awful lyrics from great bands right now.
Heard a Sugababes song last week. I had never really concentrated on the lyrics before, but my God were they awful. That doesn't really count though 'cos I didn't like them anyway.
xm

Ro: maaan!

My Sig... from Blondie's "Rapture": And he shoots you dead, and he eats your head.

Most of the "rap" bit of that song is pure shite.

hippu

worst lyric ever - hey hey youre the monkeys and people say you monkey around
-Big Sur - the thrills

jeessus fuking christ!

Ro: maaan!

Just reading those Elevation lyrics... They really are crap. Though you wouldn't notice it at all from listening to the song.

christi

I have so got "one"

Blondie's "Heart of Glass" *insert dry gagging noise here*

Not only are the lyrics "stupid" and oh so incredibly "infantile" (seriously, I wrote better poetry in kindergarden for Feck sake!) But it's the same "merde" over and over again... Just to hear that song... *Shivers & more dry gags*

Another 80's tune that possitively "sucks ass" - "A total eclipse of the heart" !!!

And at the mention of those two sorry excuses for songs... I have to go throw-up now

memaeve

Originally posted by christi


Another 80's tune that possitively "sucks ass" - "A total eclipse of the heart" !!!

That's a great song!
xm

christi

"I don't know what to do
I'm always in the dark
I'm living in a power keg
and giving off sparks...
I really you tonight
forevers gonna start tonight..."

Oh la la C'est du Shakespeare if ever I heard it!

Smurfpiss

ah ive heard worse.
'sides its an official one hit wonder - gotta be a popular decent band!
i kinda like the apes lyric but im crazy so there ya go!
RHCP zephyr song:

Did you meet your fortune teller
Get it off with no propellor
Do it up it's always stellar
What a way to finally smell her

yes......

cant say i like the song...but theyre a good band.

christi

well a few others:

Hungry like the wolf - Duran Duran (just bad and all that moaning at the end - sounds like the woman is trying to pass something the size of a bowling ball!)

The Reflex - Duran Duran
"The reflex is a lonely child who's waiting by the parc...
Everything the reflex does, leaves an answer with a question mark..."

Safety Dance - Men without hats
"You can dance if you want to
you can leave your friends behind
you can act real rude and totally removed
you can act like an imbacil..." - not a proud moment for Canada*

Let's not forget,
Toni Basil's "Oh Mickey"
And me always without my cheerleading pompoms... so I just kicked the hell out of the nearest perky girl

Oy Vay... The 80's are just chalk-full of bad lyrics!

bandit

Ice Hockey hair by the super furries :-
Table tennis rules, they're so confusing it's not played by fools

Red Chord by The Frames :-
I was in the uni,
in the university of blind love and black poetry,
and it was there I met you,
you were happy like an angel......

And there is always Oasis to laugh at

Some might say :-
The sink is full of fishes,
shes got dirty dishes on the brain
and my dogs been itching,
itching in the kitchen once again...

But worse of all has to be Little James by Oasis

Little James, we're all the same
They always seem to look to us
But we weren't meant to be grown ups
Thank you for your smile
You make it all worthwhile to us

You live for your toys, even though they make noise
Have you ever played with plastercine
Or even tried a trampoline
Thank you for your smile
You make it all worthwhile to us

I'm singing this song for you and your mum that's all
'Cos it won't be long before everyone is gone

Sailed out to sea, your mum you and me
You swam the ocean like a child
Life around us was so wild
Thank you for your smile
You make it all worthwhile to us

I'm singing this song for you and your mum that's all
And it won't be long before everyone is gone

christi

Who can forget the fiasco that was "Dexi's midnight runners" and the one hot smash that was "Come on Elean" ? ! !

There was actually a "tura lura lura..." in that song.... and Oh god - the video... All that teased to the heavens hair, and the overalls with the hairy armpits!!! *oh I shiver at the thought and visual of that!"

He he he which the mind then leads to "Culture Club" & the enigma that was "Boy George!"

Almost makes me miss the 80's ....... "NOT!"

Wacker

Just one for you, that you'll probably all remember:

"What she gonna look like with a chimney on her?" - The Tamperer.

Can anyone tell me what the hell that means? Please?

bandit

A reference to the wicked witch of the west in the Wizard of Oz I would assume.

IanluvsKathleen

was it not the wicked witch of the east that got mangled by the house and that in turn pis$ed off the wicked witch of the west which resulted in the ensuing vendetta.

sorry bandit but the manics - you love us.

"you love us.....you love us, you love us, you love us"

irony if you will but they SUCK.

yeah rapture by Blondie is quite fantastically ****e for lyrics also.

and i really fukcing hate "all i wanna do" by sheryl crow.

Creature

Originally posted by IanluvsKathleen


"you love us.....you love us, you love us, you love us"

irony if you will but they SUCK.

In your opinion, maybe, but not mine.

IanluvsKathleen

well you are quoting Nietzsche so it kinda figures.

they SSUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKK.

chromesoulno.5

hilary duffs crap tune 'so yesterday' when she says

If the light is off
Then it isn't on

that is beautifull, absolutley beautiful.

butterfly

Originally posted by bandit

Red Chord by The Frames :-
I was in the uni,
in the university of blind love and black poetry,
and it was there I met you,
you were happy like an angel......

first of all it's there i FOUND you, & second, DON'T DISS THE SONG best song ever.. well not ever, but still, it's up there.. and that's my favourite part.. sniff.. you've ruined my happy nearly friday buzz!!

probably my least favourite song lyrics ever are (from chili peppers song which i'm not bothered checking right this minute.. it's on californication i think..)
'to fingerpaint is not a sin i dip my middle finger in your monthly blood is what i win i'm in your house so let me spin'
it gives me those not-in-a-good-way chills..
and further on in the same song 'up to my neck in alligators, let's get it on with the alligator haters'
it's quite obvious that most chartish poppy music (á la hilary duff) is going to be bollocks, is there really a point in puttin it in?
we could list off pretty much every song that's come out of.. anywhere into the charts of the last year or song (except hey ya!) and throw it in crap lyric category but is there really a point?

Smurfpiss

yeah....incessant bitching!
ah but seriously ya gotta point. Its gotta be a band phantom would play, other wise their aint much point..so no more pop - most of its crap,
and the 80's?i think that speaks for itself!

HelgaTheSwedishMilkmaid

"I don't know what to do
I'm always in the dark
I'm living in a power keg
and giving off sparks..."

Awww Id always hoped it was "living in a powder cake". Oh well.

Love that song,it's best sung in a really Dubliny accent.

HelgaTheSwedishMilkmaid

Ooh by the way, what about mis-heard lyrics that sound silly, par example:

Gwyneth Paltrow&Huey Lewis 'Cruisin' - "Baby lets cruise" "No way..."

Mundy's 'Addicted' -"It suits you.......etc...cos you're a d**k head"

Heh heh

geebus

oi smurfpiss the lyrics are in fact:
"she took off her tshirt,
like a worm i'd eat dirt just to be beside her every single night"

still crap. but ash didn't write it.

Smurfpiss

ah foiled!
yeah i found out after it was a cover, which restored faith in ash...
me cupala (however you spell that) on the lyrics...still not mad into them!

Cherry

Saints & Sinners by Paddy Maher. I mean. . . Paddy 'Casey'.

Anyone can loose it all
Anyone can loose it all
If you don't heed your warnings call
Anyone can loose it all

Anyone can make a mess
Anyone can make a mess
Just take so much and make it less
Anyone can make a mess

Anyone can be a saint
Well anyone can be a saint
Well you just forget that you ain't
Well we can go and be a saint

Anyone can be a star
Well anyone can be a star
We'll just get in your car
And we can go and be a star

Lyrics by numbers, I dare say.

trent_derby

I love cheesy lyrics on all 80s songs, it adds to the overall 80sness of the song, but i feel very very very strongly about crap lyrics in dance tunes, mostly beacause its just one line repeated over and over again...........

e.g No no, No no no no, no no no no, no no theres no limit.

QED

Smurfpiss

you think thats bad? try listening to handels messiah! ok its rather good, but it still takes em half an hour just to say one line....glory to god?yeah i kinda got it the first time..

trent_derby

Desree - life.

Ooh, Yeah
Oh yeah
Oh Life
Oh Life
I'm afraid of the dark
Especially when I'm in the park
When there's no one else around
Oh I get the shivers
I don't wanna see a ghost
It's the sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast
Watch the evening news
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
I'm a superstitious girl
I'm the worst in the world
Never walk under ladders
I keep a rabbits' tail
I'll take you up on a dare
Anytime, anywhere
Name the place, I'll be there
Bungee jumping, I don't care
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life
So after all's said and done
I know I'm not the only one
Life indeed can be fun
If you really want to
Sometimes living out your dreams
Ain't as easy as it seems
You wanna fly around the world
In a beautiful balloon
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Life, oh life
Oh life, oh life
Oh life, oh life..


Sorry about the length of the post, but i just had to demonstrate the overall s.h.i.tness of the lyrics as a whole.

butterfly

ok, just thought of a good one...
'i can't lie on my pocket trout, so i'll sit back in the easy chair...'
this being mundy, and from (oh my my my oh my my my oh my my my, my,) July..
is it just me mishearing or are they the actual words..,?

aw cmon, is it really fair to slag theno no no no no no no no no no no no no there's no limits people, wasn't her fault she had a stutter..

ok in another vein, anyone know 'that smell' by lynyrd skynyrd?: 'oooh that smell, cantcha smell that smell? ooh that smell... the smell of death surrounds you..'

trent_derby

Let me just reitorate -

I don't wanna see a ghost
It's the sight that I fear most
I'd rather have a piece of toast

Crapola of the highest order.

If there was a rating of this type of crap it would be exquisite.

Yes exquisite crap.

Smurfpiss

If there was a rating of this type of crap it would be exquisite.

and how does that smell?

bandit

Originally posted by butterfly
ok, just thought of a good one...
'i can't lie on my pocket trout, so i'll sit back in the easy chair...'
this being mundy, and from (oh my my my oh my my my oh my my my, my,) July..
is it just me mishearing or are they the actual words..,?

I believe said same song contains the gem ''babe-arama everywhere''

trent_derby

and how does that smell?

Quite bad,exquisitely bad.

finis (FIN-is, fee-NEE) noun

The end; conclusion.

Apple_A_Day

OH OH OH I've got one !!!

AAAAAGAAAAA . . do do do
Push pineapple grind cofeeee !!

Have an Apple !!

Smurfpiss

On the same vein as mundy...exactly why do all the boys go "oh my my my" at the sight of a woman of middle age in a greyhound skirt?

I mean I know offaly might be a bit short on female eye candy,but sweet jesus!!

gonna see him tonight anyway!

IanluvsKathleen

Originally posted by bandit
I believe said same song contains the gem ''babe-arama everywhere''

i was just going to post that gem up on the board.

"babe-arama everywhere"

Christ its the pits.

Fukcing clown-shoe

butterfly

no no this wasn't what i was saying, great song great song...
it's how the beauty of that one good beautiful day so even grey skirted minging looks like your mother (unless your mother's a MILF) auld one looks decent.... see? a sentiment i think we can all relate to.... (pass it on..)
but can anyone Please help clarify the pocket trout?? because it makes little or no sense unless taken completely out of context into a way where 'horses could mean cabbage' sort of way, y'know, that sorta way, where nothing means anything anymore, and then it means something, you get me?

Smurfpiss

butterfly, quite hogging the spliff and pass it down the line! :cool:
tis a great song, its also the only mundy song that the students of maynooth know all the words to!twas a good gig.

trent_derby

Maybe pocket trout is the old salmon on a ten pence piece.

Maybe the lyrics are s.h.i.t


Who knows???

It is the mystery of the dance.

Smurfpiss

http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Boulevard/1086/trout.html


I can't belive it actually exists.

bandit

It baffles me how nobody has mentioned Damien Dempsey yet...

This is from the oxegen board :-

Baby you're the queen and I'm the king
And when you sing you bring spring to this winter king
And tis not no fling, coz I'm under your wing
And I'm staying put, I'm not in a rut
I've got a feeling in my gut
About ya, I've got reason to doubt ya
But I don't know what I'd do without ya
Your eyes shine like the sunshine
And your lips are like fine wine
And now they're all mine"

I got this of another web site.

Take me out on the jar today
We'll drink stout and we'll be okay
We might get out of our homes tonight
We'll get in a fight alright

He also has some rubbish song about the celtic tiger that I heard in Whelans last night and nearly fell off my seat laughing at...

trent_derby

There is a pocket trout!!!!
Well paint my arse and slap my willy!!!!
I cant believe it!!!!

Smurfpiss

careful not to wander to far on the website. its a New Kids On the Block fan site...gah!! the horrors.

damien dempsey...does his horsesh*t even qualify as music?

butterfly

smurfpiss, i bow down to you in homage. i humble myself before the pocket trout. i will never again listen to that song with a confused look of bewilderment spreading across my face (gradually, from the chin up..) i thank you for giving things the meaning they had so sadly lost..

and no, it's my spliff.

damien dempsey rocks, in all fairness..
i used to hate him, and then when i met him i hated him more (mean&angry man...) but maaaaaan he's so **** cool, cmon!!

'doin E doin speed doin cocaine,
mix it with alcohol i go insane
all alone on the edge of the knife
where the hell is the bright side of life?
it's a farcical high for a few hours
then you're down and you can't see the bright flowers
(can't remember the next two lines but then it goes)
I'm givin it up i swear, in the new year......
no more of that for me, you'll see.......
I'm gonna be goin straight, i can't wait.......
til this year is gone, PARTY ON............'

he's fantastic.

LOVE YOURSELF TO-DAY, OK????
OK?????

Smurfpiss

the thought of Monsiour Dempsey "loving himself" makes me rather queasy. :dunno:

trent_derby

I have just noticed, the bad lyrics seem to eminate from solo artists, most notably mundy and DD.

Maybe its because they dont have anyone to tell them how exquisitly crap their lyrics are.....