Best simpsons moment ever

JP Mulvano

Probably been done alot but didnt see any recently so here we go.

Lets seem what your favourite/classic simpsons moments.

mine has to be when Homer goes to the post office after Bart posts a letter he wrote to Mr Burns, that he didnt want to send, after he gave the family nothing when Bart donated his blood.

Homer (in a posh high pitched voice): Hello my name is Mr. Burns, I believe you have a letter for me?
Postal worker: Okay Mr. Burns whats your first name?
Homer (in same voice): I don't know!!!

Runs OFF!!!

Classic, sheer simpsons classic.

bubblymc

When Homer puts on loads of weight to work from home. When he sits in front of the computer and it says "Press any key to continue" and he shouts "Where's the any key, where's the any key!!!!"

Creamy Goodness

flaming moe episode where

lisa jynx's (sp) bart and goes he goes the homer and homer says "what is my son?" bart writes say my name on a bit of paper and homer says "what is it boy?"
bart gets angry and says " say my name!!" then homer hits him cos he broke the jynx

funniest moment ever

Ragamuffin

Originally posted by bubblymc
When Homer puts on loads of weight to work from home. When he sits in front of the computer and it says "Press any key to continue" and he shouts "Where's the any key, where's the any key!!!!"

I like the bit where the phone goes "Your fingers are too fat to dial. If you want to order a pressing wand please mash the keypad now." LOL:D

Devious

Some episode where Homers in court and has just been sentenced. Hes desperate and pleads with his lawyer "Play the race card" (then through gritted teeth and whilest waving his fist) "Play it!!!".

I cried laughing.

Sarky

The daredevil episode, when homer kept falling off the cliff.

JBoyle4eva

Whe it's valentines day and Marge and Homer are going to #sniggle' but marge is too tired. Homer then plays her 'TURN ON' music, but it's a piano playing Twinkle Twinkle/ Homer announces "OH NO! That must mean" The scene then cuts to Maggie in her cot, strutting along to Tom Jones' song "Sex Bomb"

I was laughing for 5 mins when I seen that joke:D

article6

Seen them too often to think of the best one, but this was a good one (from the art episode a few days ago):

Lisa: Well, Dad, if the museum didn't inspire you, maybe you should do something *really* radical like Christo.
Homer: Is he that jerk that revealed the magicians' secrets?
Lisa: No, Christo is a conceptual artist who does huge outdoor projects. He once wrapped the Reichstag in plastic.
Homer: Not the Reichstag!

Cina

The whole episode where Homer becomes addicted to cannibus, and that band Phish guest star is sheer brilliance. That was really just T.V comedy at it's absolute peak.

oeNeo

The New York episode when Homer is remembering his trip there when he was younger. It's just so damn good.

Kunst

Mr Plow Episode

after they watch homers ad on the tv

Homer: and now we play the waiting game...
(Long Silence)
Homer: Nah, the waiting game sucks. lets play hungry hungry hippos


classic stuff

Nike_Dude

In the episode Saddlesore Gallactica that was on a few weeks ago.

Homer (pointing at a horse): heh where do you get those metal deelies on his feet?
Jockey: You mean horse shoes
Homer: Whats with the attitude? I just want some deelies.

I laughed for about 10 minutes the first time I saw it

Pigman II

(still hoping ....)

Season 21, Episode #467

Homer comes home in a huff after getting fired from his job at the SNPP for the 57th time.

He gets out a shotgun from under the stairs and kills Marge and the 3 kids before turning the gun on himself in a last act of benovolence. Scene cuts to the Krusty the Clown Show ...

Krusty : "Well kids, we all know that sometimes when cartoon characters die, they're back again the very next week. That's why I'm presenting this sworn affidavit the The Simpsons (c) will never, ever, ever return!"

The End

quank

eh... ok....

The one where Bart steals Bonestorm

And the security guy says to Marge

"Sure, he's stealing video games now. But next he'll be stealing ... stadiums... and eh, quarries... "

Not sure about the wording but still fecking gas :D

RuggieBear

How about the Scorpio episode...where james bond escapes from the table by flicking a coin up which splits the laser into 4 beams which cut his manicles off....and then Homer tackles him and off screen you here him getting shot to death...

Absolute classic...in fact i think its my favourite episode!!

P

SantaHoe

In the Monty Burns Casino episode where Mr.Burns has gone a bit nutty, he holds a small wooden air plain in his hand.
Burns: Back to the power plant, we'll take the spruce moose, hop in!
Smithers has no idea what to do...
Mr burns pulls a gun and cocks it.
Burns: I said... hop in.
Not hugely funny in words, but I think the voice acting carried it off perfectly.

Nuttzz

bart dials 911 and gets the automated service, he then mashes his hand on the key pad and the automated voice says "you have selected regiside, if you know the name of the king or queen being murdered please press 1......"

homer asks hank scoripo for some sugar and he pulls some out of his pockets and then asks homer "do you want some cream"

Simi

The one where Homer and Mindy charge room service to Mr. Burns...
Smithers: Sir, Somebody is charging roomservice to the company.
Mr. Burns: We'll see about that. (Lets monkeys out of cage) Fly my pretties! Fly! (All fall out window)
Monkeys: Ahhhhhhhhh!!!
Mr. Burns: Continue the research...

Astro1996

Classic simpsons

Homer: "All right, men, get ready to blast off. [Slowly begins to
drive forward]
Whooo! We're in orbit now! What's that? A call from the
President? Hello?
[Switches to Nixon voice] Uh, yes. Let me just say this,
about that.
[Homer voice] Okay, Mr. President ..."
Bart and Millhouse get bored and go off to Martins patry and homer keeps going, drives into the washing line...."Mayday! Mayday!"

Homer: "Here are your messages. You have thirty minutes to move your car. You have ten minutes. Your car has been impounded. Your car has been crushed into a cube. You have thirty minutes to move your cube." Then the phone rings, homer says hello, and burns ask "is it about my cube?"

Or were Kang and Kodos take over clinton and dole

clinton: My fellow Americans. As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball, but
tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward, upward not forward,
and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom

Brilliant. As the comic book guy says..."best show ever"

0utshined

There's too many classic moments to choose just one. These are some of my favourites:


Krusty on trial

Judge : Krusty the Klown, how do you plead?
Krusty : I plead guilty your honour
Courtroom (Shocked and in awe ): *mutter* *mutter*
Krusty : oh, ho-ho, I mean not guilty, opening night jitters your honour....


Homer has his jaws wired shut, no-one can understand what he's saying

Marge : This has been one of the most magical evenings of my life
Homer : *muffled* I'M HORNY
Marge : I don't know what you said but i'm sure it was beautiful



Bart : Millhouse, you ready to imitate that Jackass show?
Millhouse: All those disclaimers made me want to do it more


McBain trying to get an orphan to testify
McBain : Can you do it Timmy? Can you do it for McBain?
Timmy : O...Okay,for you...McBain

* cut to McBain in Chiefs office
Chief : Timmy's dead McBain!
McBain: Hey,..he knew the risks



Homer watching TV, a show called "When buildings collapse III"

Narrator: Man has always loved his buildings. But what happens when those buildings say.. No More!
Homer : He he, I didn't think it was goinng to fall down, but then it did.



Moe at his new trendy bar "M" trying to chat up a woman
Russian Ladyboy : And after Chernobyl, my penis fell off.
Moe : And Penis is russian for...?

Woden

Originally posted by Astro1996

clinton: My fellow Americans. As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball, but
tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward, upward not forward,
and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom

yeah that came up recently in discussion tis quality, the one i always pull out when doing simpsons quote is something along the lines of:

homer to marge about lisa: and this perpetual motion machine she made today is a joke, it just keeps going faster and faster

.... talk about getting the kids back to school

homer: i'm with you marge, lisa get in here

homer: in this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics

quality

The Song Thrush

After Homer drops all the contents of the barbecue box into the cement....

Homer: Oh no, English instructions have been ruined.... must read French instructions!
...... 'le grill'? What the hell is that?!

AND

The Simpsons are trying to escape from the police officer. They all hop into their car...
Lisa: But dad, he's got your license!
Homer: Oh, I'm gonna try it anyway!
Homer turns the key and the engine starts.
Homer: It worked! It's a miracle!

beardedchicken

the one where lisa becomes a vegetarian and sets free homers pig from the barbecue

Homer: it's just a little dirty, it's still good, it's still good
Homer: it's just a little wet, it's still good, it's still good
Homer: it's just a little airborne, it's still good, it's still good

milltown

Originally posted by 0utshined

Moe at his new trendy bar "M" trying to chat up a woman
Russian Ladyboy : And after Chernobyl, my penis fell off.
Moe : And Penis is russian for...?

Heh, same episode when Homer and co. get annoyed at what Moe has done to the bar, they accuse him of turning into a big phoney.

Moe: That's it! Nobody calls Moe St. Cool a phoney! Throw them out.

The episode where Lisa joins MENSA, Homer is drinking in Moe's with Stephen Hawking.
Moe: I'm closing up now, who's looking after the tab?
Homer (in robotic voice, hand over mouth): I am.
S.H.: I didn't say that.
Homer (robotic): Yes I did.
Hawking punches Homer in the face with an extending boxing glove from his wheelchair.
Homer (robotic): D'oh!

kenny

The episode where Bart finds out he can be divorced form his parents.

Bart: I wanna be emancipated.

Homer (worried): Whats the matter boy, don't you like being a dude.

JBoyle4eva

Originally posted by kenny
The episode where Bart finds out he can be divorced form his parents.

Bart: I wanna be emancipated.

Homer (worried): Whats the matter boy, don't you like being a dude.

VERY FUNNY INDEED! BTW, that's the 300th episode!

Another funny clip:

From episode where Homer is reading an unreturned library book to the Kids:

Lisa: They didn't really kill Joan of Arc, did they?
Homer: Well.....
Marge:(INTERUPTING) No they didn't , and Joan was saved by God and put into a nice soft field, THE END!(She rips the page out of the book and eats it) Well, it's easier to chew than the Bambi video!:D

Kobie

A tripple whammy:


Homer: Oh God, I'd do anything for a ticket to the game

*Doorbell Rings*

Flanders: Hideley Ho Neighbour - I've a got a spare ticket to the game and was just wondering...

*Homer slams door shut*

Homer (looking up): Lord, why must thou mock me?

Marge: Homer, that's not God, it's a pancake Bart threw up there yesturday.

*Marge knocks the pancake down with a brush & Homer catches it*

Homer: Lord, I know I shouldn't eat thee...

*Eats Pancake*

Homer: Mmmmmm.... Sacrelicious

pork99

Originally posted by SantaHoe
In the Monty Burns Casino episode where Mr.Burns has gone a bit nutty, he holds a small wooden air plain in his hand.
Burns: Back to the power plant, we'll take the spruce moose, hop in!
Smithers has no idea what to do...
Mr burns pulls a gun and cocks it.
Burns: I said... hop in.
Not hugely funny in words, but I think the voice acting carried it off perfectly.

"no we'll keep the jars of urine"

pork99

Isn't it interesting how the most of the quotes people remember here are from roughly seasons 2 - 8?

I love the Simpsons but I really think they have done it to death by now

For me it went into terminal decline when

1) Barney became a reformed alcoholic

2) The actor who did the voices for Troy McClure and Lionel Hutz died (I heard he was murdered?)

3) Maude Flanders died in a freak accident.

Never been the same since

http://www.jumptheshark.com/ and look up the Simpsons

aidan_dunne

Episode where Marge talks Homer into giving up beer for 30 days:

Homer poors beer down the sink

"Well beer, we've had some great times........"

Starts reminiscing and sings.....

"When I was 17, I drank some very good beer.
I drank some very good beer I purchased with a fake I.D.
My name was Brian McGee.
I stayed up listening to Queen,
When I was 17.


Episode where Homer starts daydreaming about the "Ummmm, Land Of Chocolate!"

Episode where Homer eats the hallucinigenic chilli peppers and starts going on some kind of weird, drug-like trip.

Episode where Homer decides to become a hippy and the "special, personal stash" of vegetables gets juiced up and shipped out to the public and everyone starts tripping. ("Pucker up, NED!")

The "Pulp Fiction" pisstake where Chief Wiggum and the boys are sitting in Krusty Burger talking about McDonalds:

"You know, I went to the McDonald's in Shelbyville on Friday night"
"A Mc What?"
"A McDonald's restaurant. I never heard of it either but they have over 2000 locations in this state alone."
"Hmmm, must have sprung up overnight."
"But you know, it's the little differences."
"Example."
"Well, in McDonald's you can buy a Krusty Burger with cheese, right? But they don't call it a Krusty Burger with cheese."
"Get out! Well, what do they call it?"
"A Quarterpounder with cheese."
"A Quarterpounder with cheese? Well, I can picture the cheese, but.... Hey, do they have Krusty's Partially Gelatinated Gum-Based beverages?"
"Yeah, they call them 'shakes'."
"Pfft! 'Shakes'! You don't know what you're getting."

So many great moments (and loads more that I can't recall at the moment!). Pity it's been going downhill the past couple of years.

pork99

Hi I'm actor Troy McClure. You might remember me from

...such films as "The Erotic Adventures of Hercules" and "Dial 'M' for Murderousness".

....such films as "'P' is for Psycho" and "The President's Neck is Missing".

....such films as "Today We Kill, Tomorrow We Die" and "Gladys, the Groovy Mule".

....such films as "The Greatest Story Ever Hula-ed" and "They Came to Burgle Carnegie Hall".

....such Fox Network Specials as "Alien Nose Job" and "The Five Fabulous Weeks of the Chevy Chase Show".

....such self-help videos as "Smoke Yourself Thin" and "Get Some Confidence, Stupid!"

....such nature films as "Earwigs: Ewwww" and "Man vs. Nature: The Road to Victory".

....such celebrity funerals as "Andre The Giant, We Hardly Knew Ye" and "Shemp Howard, Today We Mourn A Stooge".

....such telethons as "Out With Gout '88" and "Let's Save Tony Orlando's House".

....such cartoons as "Christmas Ape" and "Christmas Ape goes to Summer Camp".

....such driver's ed films as "Alice's Adventures through the Windshield Glass" and "The Decapitation of Larry Leadfoot".

....such TV spinoffs as "Son of Sanford and Son" and "After Mannix".

....such instructional videos as "Mothballing Your Battleship" and "Dig Your Own Grave and Save".

....such public service videos as "Designated Drivers, the Lifesaving Nerds" and "Phony Tornado Alarms Reduce Readiness".

....such medical films as "Alice Doesn't Live Anymore" and "Mommy, What's Wrong With That Man's Face?".

....such automated information kiosks as "Welcome to Springfield Airport" and "Where's Nordstrom?".

....such Do-It-Yourself home videos such as "The half-assed approach to foundation repair"

JBoyle4eva

A real classic here:

When Marge comes back for Homer while pregnant with bart, speaking into the drive-thru speaaker:

Homer: Whadda you want?

Marge: My husband by side!

Homer: You want fries with that?:)

Then, outside a few secs later!
Homer: but I can't afford a wedding ring.

Marge: I don't care, just as long as it's from you

Homer then puts on an onion ring!

Marge: Do you mind taking it off, it's burning my finger!

Homer takes it off, then eats it!:D

Bigshot

Pretty Much the whole of the Scorpio episode but especially when Homer goes looking for some sugar for his coffee.

Homer: Mr Scorpio do you know where i could get some sugar.

Scorpio: Sure Homer i got some right here
Reaches into his pocket and takes out a pile of unpackaged sugar

Homer: Thanks

Scorpio: You want some Cream

Homer: Yeeaa NO.


Classic.

Nick_oliveri

Dunno what episode

Homer goes to the fridge and gets the can of beer that bart has shook to bits.
bart- "April foo..."
A big explosion ensues.

Kain

When moe gets plastic surgury
Moe: Hey Duffman how do you like a sticker on your face? *puts sticker on Duffmans face*
Duffman: Duffman cannot breath... oh yea *thrusts pelvis*

*Treehouse of Horrors
Mr Burns: ahhh, fresh victims for my army of the undead
Smithers: Sir, you have to take your finger off the button or they can hear you
Mr Burns: Oh son of a bitc....... *intercom goes dead*

weemcd

Burns-"use the amnesia ray"
Smithers"don't you mean the revolver?"
Burns-" yes dont forget to use it on yourself when your finished"

burns is a great character for lines
he has loads more, ill rember them and post them up

pork99

Originally posted by weemcd

burns is a great character for lines

Look at them, Smithers. Goldbrickers.... Layabouts.... Slug-a-beds! Little do they realise their days of suckling at my teat are numbered.

Chong

Hey guys Homer is God Best Quotes ever below:

Dear Lord: The gods have been good to me. For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is. So here's the deal:

You freeze everything the way it is, and I won't ask for anything more. If that is OK, please give me absolutely no sign. OK, deal. In gratitude, I present you this offering of cookies and milk. If you want me to eat them for you, give me no sign. Thy will be done."


Mayor: "Ich bin ein Springfielder." Homer: "Mmmmm. Jelly Donuts."
Absolute Classic.


Apu: I have come to make amends, sir. At first, I blamed you for squealing, but then I realized, it was I who wronged you. So I have come to work off my debt. I am at your service.
Homer: You're...selling what, now?
Apu: I am selling only the concept of karmic realignment.
Homer: You can't sell that! Karma can only be portioned out by the cosmos. [slams the door]
Apu: He's got me there.


Mrs. K: I believe with persistent discipline, even the poorest student can end up becoming, oh, say, Chief Justice of The Supreme Court.
Homer: Chief Justice of The Supreme Court. What great men he would join: John Marshall. Charles Evans Hughes. Warren Berger. Hmmmm, Burger...


Marge: Homer, there's a man here that thinks he can help you!
Homer: Is it Batman?
Marge: No, he's a scientist.
Homer: Batman's a scientist.
Marge: It's not Batman!

Lisa: Oedipus is the one who killed his father and married his mother
Homer: Argh! who paid for that wedding?

Homer: Hey Moe that team late night sure did suck, they just plain sucked, i mean i have seen teams suck before but they were the suckyest bunch of suckers that ever sucked"

Homer:"your teacher's name is Krabappel? I've been calling her Krandall. Oh,I've been making an idiout out of my self.


Seriously the probably best three words homer has ever said are:



Save me, Jeebus!

Kain

JFK's terrible secret

JFK: "Ich bin ein Berliner"
Granpa: "HE'S A NAZI, GET HIM" *Runs up the boat and beats that **** out of JFK*

ubu

So mant classic moments, a few that come to mnd:

Homer: oh, they have the internet on computers now

Homer: (to Lisa) are you saying youre never goin to eat any animal again?...what about bacon?, No, Ham, No, Pork chops? Dad they all come from the same animal, oh yea Lisa some kind of Magical Animal

Homer: "oh my God, space aliens Dont eat me, i have a wife and kids, eat them"

Homer(at the Past Office) : Hello, my name is Mr.Burns, i believe you have a letter for me. Ok Mr.Burns, whats your first name? Homer: I Dont Know

Homer: I am so smart, i am so smart, S M R T, I mean S M A R T

Burns to homer(playing golf): use an open faced club, a sandwedge Homer: mmmmm open faced club sandwich

McBain: my eyes, the goggles they do nothing

Moe: alright this is the busiest day of the year, where are the designated drivers?.....beat it i got no room for cheapskates!

Mr.Burns : i dont like being outdoors smithers, for one thing theres too many fat children!

Mrs Bouvier to mr.Burns: i swear monty, youre the devil himself. Burns: WHO TOLD YO..... oh yes yes

Ralph: your touching my special area

Ralph: the doctor said i wouldnt have so many nosebleeds if i kept my finger outta there!

Ralph: me fail english, thats unpossible (Brilliant!)

have to say Homer is the man
Simpson, Homer Simpson, hes the greatest guy in History,
from the town of Springfield, Hes about to hit a chestnut tree

Creature

Not sure of the exact wording but here goes


In Moe's bar;


Bart to the Red Hot Chili Peppers: Hey would you guys play at a Krusty The Clown benefit show?

RHCP: Sure just get us out of here

Bart To Moe: Hey Moe look over there

Moe turns around and Bart and the RHCP walk out

Moe: What? What am I looking at? I'm gonna stop looking soon

Homer walks in

Homer: Hey Moe can I look too??

Moe: Sure, but it'll cost ya

Homer: My wallet's in the car! *runs out to get wallet*

Moe: Heh heh sucker. And now back to looking.

aidan_dunne

Marge: "I have to go out now but, when I get back, that pie had better still be there."

Marge leaves

Homer: "Okay, pie, I'm just going to sit here going like this....

Homer makes chomping motions with his mouth

"..... and if you go and get all eaten, that's your own fault!"



Homer: "I'm not normally a praying man but, if you're up there, please save me Superman!"

gerire

Mr Burns' see my vest song

Some men hunt for sport,
Others hunt for food,
The only thing I'm hunting for,
Is an outfit that looks good...

See my vest, see my vest,
Made from real gorilla chest,
Feel this sweater, there's no better,
Than authentic Irish setter.

See this hat, 'twas my cat,
My evening wear - vampire bat,
These white slippers are albino
African endangered rhino.

Grizzly bear underwear,
Turtles' necks, I've got my share,
Beret of poodle, on my noodle
It shall rest,

Try my red robin suit,
It comes one breast or two,
See my vest, see my vest,
See my vest.

Like my loafers? Former gophers -
It was that or skin my chauffeurs,
But a greyhound fur tuxedo
Would be best,

So let's prepare these dogs,
Mrs. Potts: Kill two for matching clogs,
Burns: See my vest, see my vest,
Oh please, won't you see my vest.

krunchytheklown

The funniest episode ever is were krusty isn't funny no more and bart, jay lenno, mr.tiny are bathing krusty and homer walks in.

Bart: dad!!!!!!!!!!!
Homer: I never knew you , jay leno and a monkey were bathing a klown.
Krusty: Make with the luffa or get out.

Zapper

"Dear baby.

Welcome to dumpsville, population: YOU!"

monkeymagic

Has to be in the Cape Fear episode when Sideshow Bob comes out from hiding under the car and starts standign on the rakes.

THWACK *shudders*
THWACK *shudders*

cracks me up everytime lol

Oriel

Homer: "I'm not going to lie to you marge."
then homer goes back to watching TV without saying annything more.


or during the 70s rabbit sex education tape
Mrs Krabappel: "She's faking it..."

S.

Dr.Klownius

The funniest episode ever is were krusty isn't funny no more and bart, jay lenno, mr.tiny are bathing krusty and homer walks in.