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The Chicken

  • 14-11-2003 10:28am
    #1
    UnrealQueen
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,190 ✭✭✭


    WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?
    >
    >SAEED AL SAHAF - Iraqi Head of Information
    >The chicken did not cross the road.
    >This is a complete fabrication.
    >In fact, we do not even have a chicken.
    >
    >HANS BLIX
    >We have reason to believe there may be potential for this chicken's
    >capability, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other
    >side of the road.
    >
    >COLIN POWELL
    >Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of
    >the chicken crossing the road.
    >
    >GEORGE W BUSH
    >We don't care why the chicken crossed the road.
    >We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
    >The chicken is either for us or against us.
    >There is no middle ground.
    >
    >TONY BLAIR
    >I agree with George.
    >
    >JOHN HOWARD
    >I agree with George and Tony.
    >
    >KIM BEAZLEY
    >There is no challenge to the chicken at this stage, but if I were crossing
    >the road ....
    >
    >SIMON CREAN
    >@#@#!!@ Chicken. No one crosses the @#@#!!@ road without my @#@#!!@ say so.
    >It's time for the chicken to put up or shut up.
    >
    >PETER HOLLINGWORTH (Governor-General)
    >I am not aware of any impropriety in the chicken crossing the road. In fact
    >I am led to believe that it was the other way around and the chicken asked
    >for it
    >
    >DR SEUSS
    >Did the chicken cross the road?
    >Did he cross it with a toad?
    >Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
    >but why it crossed I've not been told.
    >
    >MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
    >I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without
    >having their motives called into question.
    >
    >GRANDPA
    >In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
    >Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
    >
    >OPRAH
    >Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the
    >chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it felt
    >accomplishing its lifelong dream of crossing the road.
    >
    >JOHN LENNON
    >Imagine all the chickens, crossing all the roads.
    >You may say I'm a dreamer - but its not the only hen.
    >
    >MICHAEL JACKSON
    >There's nothing more wonderful than sharing your bed with a chicken.
    >
    >ARISTOTLE
    >It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
    >
    >KARL MARX
    >It was an historic inevitability.
    >
    >ALEX FERGUSON
    >The chicken was not drawn to the other side fairly, and Beckham is not
    >bigger than this club.
    >
    >SIGMUND FREUD
    >The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road
    >reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
    >
    >BILL GATES
    >eChicken2003 version 1.0 will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file
    >your important documents, and balance your cheque book - and internet
    >explorer is an integral part of eChicken.
    >
    >ALBERT EINSTEIN
    >Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the
    >chicken?
    >
    >BILL CLINTON
    >I did not have sexual relations with that chicken!
    >
    >THE BIBLE
    >And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the chicken THOU SHALT
    >CROSS
    >THE ROAD. And the chicken didst cross the road, and there was much
    >rejoicing.
    >
    >COLONEL SANDERS
    >Did I miss one?
    >
    >HOMER SIMPSON
    >Mmmmmmmmm . . . . c h i c k e n


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