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sex and making love whats the difference

  • 30-08-2003 4:47pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,471 ✭✭✭


    i was having this conversation ages ago with my gf and i said that there was a clear and obvious between having sex and making love . but for the life of me i could not think what it was . it just came into my head today and i still couldnt think of a good way to describe the difference but know there is a good and easy way of explaining it . what do u think ? how could u describe it ?

    if this is in the wrong spot move it or if it breaks any rulz lock it


«1

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,216 ✭✭✭phreak


    making love is what your girlfriend is doing to you while you're having sex with her.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,997 ✭✭✭The_Bullman


    damn you for getting that posted before me Pheak


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 20,346 ✭✭✭✭KdjaCL


    Im sad, i have morals so technically have never had sex ,always made love.
    You have sex with someone you have no feelings for and its basicaly just satisfying your urges.
    Making love is being as close possible to someone.

    Thats my take on it all :)

    me and Ex argued about this a lot wheeares i felt we were making love she was having sex.


    kdjac


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 272 ✭✭jammy_dodger


    The difference between sex and making love is that one exsists and the other is a figment of imagination, manifested by female erotica novelists.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,081 ✭✭✭BKtje


    One is a scientific term shortened other is what people do when they have deep feelings for each other :p


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,989 ✭✭✭✭Giblet


    Sex is what you do when you're drunk and find out you woke up to a fat chick.

    Making love is when she is reall hot!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 665 ✭✭✭skittishkitten


    Ummmm...... I think .....

    Making love is suppose to be a slow seduction , full of emotion and tenderness .......

    Having Sex is the wild crazed gotta do it , gotta have it , give it to me , OH GOD this is so good type of sex ;)

    :D That's my take anyhow :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,309 ✭✭✭✭Bard


    Making love is the whole act of foreplay and having sex, whether wild and excited or slow and gentle, with someone you love and who loves you back, - an emotional union of two people, body and soul.

    Having sex is just ... well, fucking, basically.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,608 ✭✭✭✭sceptre


    Making love is what they do on American soaps. If I asked anyone I've ever gone out with if they wanted to "make love" they'd think I was running a comedy routine by them.

    "Having sex" includes foreplay. Think of it as sex with a floor show before the main feature starts. The floor show is of course sometimes optional. It's like going to an 80 minute movie (time used for illustrative "if it was a movie" purposes only) - it's nice to have a feature beforehand too. There are times when you don't have the time, all you want is the main feature. That's called "bathroom or hallway sex".

    "Making love" is a euphemism, plain and simple. Like when people first started using the word "gender" to classify people (as opposed to nouns) as male or female. Or when babies go poopee. You want to use it to mean "tender loving sex", knock yerself out. Or you could just use "tender loving sex". "Making love" is probably shorter though. It's a corruption of the word "lovemaking" (also a euphemism but it's probably where the term "making love" came from).


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 665 ✭✭✭skittishkitten


    Originally posted by Bard
    Making love is the whole act of foreplay and having sex, whether wild and excited or slow and gentle, with someone you love and who loves you back, - an emotional union of two people, body and soul.

    Having sex is just ... well, fucking, basically.

    Wild and excited would seem more like just plain having sex , but then again .... guess I wouldn't know as I've never "made love" to anyone ..... it's always sex to me


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,730 ✭✭✭✭simu


    From the posts above, you can see that it depends on how differrent ppl interpret the two phrases. Personally, I abhor the term "making love" - it just smacks of cheap sentimentality and prudery. So, I always say "having sex" whether I love the other person or not.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,446 ✭✭✭bugler


    Just different interpretations of the same thing. Females usually (though not all of them as skittish has shown here) will think they do the latter probably most/all of the time. Whereas guys will not be inclined to differentiate or else will lean toward the former :)

    I'm not comfortable with saying the phrase "making love". Very soapy indeed as sceptre said. Bard, that's very limp :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,579 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    Originally posted by skittishkitten
    Having Sex is the wild crazed gotta do it , gotta have it , give it to me , OH GOD this is so good type of sex ;)
    So, how you doin'? [/Joey voice off]


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,335 ✭✭✭Cake Fiend


    Having sex is physical, 'making love' is an emotional thing.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,622 ✭✭✭Catsmokinpot


    Originally posted by Phreak
    making love is what your girlfriend is doing to you while you're having sex with her.

    damn thats what i wanted to say as soon as i saw the thread


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,164 ✭✭✭Space Coyote


    What's the difference ?
    Making love : After the deed she smiles, kisses your forehead, gets out of bed and goes to the kitchen to make breakfast/lunch/dinner for you both.

    Having sex : She can't get out of bed.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,875 ✭✭✭Seraphina


    making love? bleh, its a bit of a soppy ooh its such an emotional experience phrase. over done really. its sex. sexual intercourse, hot sweaty and sometimes messy. stop trying to dress it up :p


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,398 ✭✭✭the fnj


    About 15 minutes.


  • Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators, Regional South East Moderators Posts: 28,536 Mod ✭✭✭✭Cabaal


    Really the only difference is a word, nothing more.
    Akthough it can be your perception of the 'action'.

    Making by using the word people romantises sex more so, or maybe some people just think the work 'sex' sounds dirty.
    So instead they use the word making love...

    just my 2cent


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,608 ✭✭✭✭sceptre


    Sorry to drag this thread back from the dying but I've had a thought.

    I'm willing to bet that the phrase "making love" comes from those guidelines they had for movies and/or TV way back (can't remember what they were called - the Hays guidelines, Hughes guidelines, something like that). I suspect that "sex" was a taboo word and they used "making love" (or, er whoopee) instead. Then it caught on. I'm far too lazy to start checking it out, though it does strike me as a phrase that probably only dates from the 1950s or 60s at the earliest.

    Which is only of interest to me probably but this will just sink back into the depths of page 2 then.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,419 ✭✭✭nadir


    I agree with bard, the foreplay is what makes making love, but more so doing the act of deep affection, as opposed to sex which is jusr ****ing.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,114 ✭✭✭Kappar


    sex and making love whats the difference

    About ten beers! budum bum bum tich


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,555 ✭✭✭Wook


    If you need to ask , then you didn't had sex nor love :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,446 ✭✭✭Havelock


    I wouldn't be so sure, to make love sounds more to me like what it actually is two people who love each other, making the physical act of love. Maybe it is a more poetic turn of speech, but I doubt its orgins are only that new.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 61 ✭✭namuras


    The difference is five minutes, and have time to catch the last bus home.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 55 ✭✭sod


    eddie murpy said it best in RAW, do you want somebody to make love to you or someone who wants to fúck the shi_t out of you motherf_ucker?? <clenched teeth and crazy eye>


    he tells em better


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,233 ✭✭✭Dont Ban Me


    To me its basically the same thing, for example
    you can have a mug of tea or a cup of tea! They both serve the same purpose but with a slight difference, you get more out of the mug (making love) then the cup (sex) in the log run (duration of you drinking the tea)!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,258 ✭✭✭✭Rabies


    some times i take a flask of tea to work.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,450 ✭✭✭AngelofFire


    Having sex is just stickin it in for then minutes then letting it pop. Making love is when u concentrate on having proper intimate emotional sex.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,414 ✭✭✭LoneGunM@n


    To me, making love is about making a connection on an emtional level .... whereas sex is all about tearing each others clothes off & going at like jack rabbits


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 665 ✭✭✭skittishkitten


    Originally posted by Rabies
    some times i take a flask of tea to work.

    :eek: Isn't that a bit risky ! I mean what if someone should find out ! The horror , the embarrassment . .....sneaking a little now and then .... a true addict to be sure . Tsk , Tsk !!:D

    Having sex is just stickin it in for then minutes then letting it pop.

    Naaaaaa...... that's just a quickie , sex can last as long as you desire (drool ) , the making love thing .... they want you to cuddle after :p


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,579 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    Originally posted by AngelofFire
    Having sex is just stickin it in for then minutes then letting it pop.
    Isn't that microwave popcorn?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,414 ✭✭✭LoneGunM@n


    Originally posted by Victor
    Isn't that microwave popcorn?

    :D:D That's brilliant :D:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 965 ✭✭✭DriftingRain


    Naaaaaa...... that's just a quickie , sex can last as long as you desire (drool ) , the making love thing .... they want you to cuddle after


    My thoughts Exactally....Kitten You need to stay outta my head, this is getting freaky!


  • Hosted Moderators Posts: 5,945 ✭✭✭BEAT


    Originally posted by Bard
    Making love is the whole act of foreplay and having sex, whether wild and excited or slow and gentle, with someone you love and who loves you back, - an emotional union of two people, body and soul.

    Having sex is just ... well, fucking, basically.

    I think Bard said it best ;)


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    She's not the only one there Driftin :)

    I think you me and kitten have to get together and have a proper chat one of these days :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,471 ✭✭✭elexes


    gave this a bit more thought and came up with the ida that maby making love was not just confined to having sex . it was the daily things you do with eachother making eachother happy etc... u know what i mean, the things that you do that is why your partner likes you . not just confined to the one act


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 665 ✭✭✭skittishkitten


    Making love is the opening of your soul to someone, a merging of mind , body and spirit . It's not just the act of sex , because you are giving them all of yourself with no holding back. During that time you fail to know where you stop and where they start , you are joined completely. That person knows you for who you are , what you are , and why you are and loves you anyway . Sex is the means of expressing this , you are offering yourself to the one you love. It's also when your at your most vulnerable , when the greatest damage can be done . Few people ever really achieve "making love" status - the opening of the soul , it doesn't happen often and it's not a continual state of being , most are happy with just sex.

    Sex is two people enjoying each others bodies. It can be done with or without emotional attachment. It can be fast or slow , rough or sweet , but both people are "involved" it the process. With sex there is always the holding a bit back of yourself, protecting yourself , the fear of letting a person in to close. Basically it's because you know that person will never accept the inner you , you remains within certain limits , certain boundaries that are acceptable to them, knowing that to cross those boundaries would be damaging to the soul. There is always a wall of defense, a holding back.

    Then there are times when you just f*ck . Both parties are consenting but usually one it doing it to please the other and not really interested in the whole event. Your either the f*ckee ( just hurry up and get it over with ) or the f*cker ( anything to get some relief ) . Sometimes you just f*ck each other , both needing release not really caring if the other achieves release or not. Most times emotions are not involved. I'm surprised that so many equate f*cking as sex .


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    Nicely put SK


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 570 ✭✭✭Dakeyras


    Originally posted by skittishkitten


    Making love is the opening of your soul to someone, a merging of mind , body and spirit .

    Sex is two people enjoying each others bodies.

    Then there are times when you just f*ck .

    Excellently put, totally agree and along the lines of what i was going to post but you put it much better than i was going to.
    :D

    Each form of sex has their time and place and you can do either with the same person, it just depends on what you both want out of it on each occasion.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,658 ✭✭✭✭The Sweeper


    I reckon the difference is the cost.

    Having sex can incur the following costs: the hire of a prostitute, or the purchase of many drinks, or the potential of a sexually transmitted disease, or the shame of scoring a minger while drunk and then waking up beside them, or the danger of being landed with a bunny boiler, or the bill for dinner and a taxi back for 'coffee', or the worry of getting caught, or the anxiety about performance.

    Making love is free. It's free of self consciousness about your body, it's free of paranoia about your partner's faithfulness, it's free of worry about STIs, it's free of anxiety about being found out, it's free of desperate efforts to make a good impression, it's free of compulsory hangovers, it's free of game playing, it's free of emotional blackmail, it's free of unequal levels of interest, it's free of all of the things that having sex can cost you.

    Don't believe me? Do you reckon you make love to a prostitute?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 665 ✭✭✭skittishkitten


    Originally posted by Minesajackdaniels
    I reckon the difference is the cost.


    Don't believe me? Do you reckon you make love to a prostitute?

    Actually you F*CK a prostitute , she has no emotion involved other that ......."please hurry and finish and give me my money"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,163 ✭✭✭Emboss


    dropping a gear and bringing the head board banging down to about 15 BPM (bumps per minute)

    Just shag her a bit slower lads!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,579 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    Originally posted by AngelofFire
    Having sex is just stickin it in for then minutes then letting it pop. Making love is when u concentrate on having proper intimate emotional sex.
    Sex
    Originally posted by skittishkitten
    Making love is the opening of your soul to someone, a merging of mind , body and spirit . It's not just the act of sex , because you are giving them all of yourself with no holding back. During that time you fail to know where you stop and where they start , you are joined completely. That person knows you for who you are , what you are , and why you are and loves you anyway . Sex is the means of expressing this , you are offering yourself to the one you love. It's also when your at your most vulnerable , when the greatest damage can be done . Few people ever really achieve "making love" status - the opening of the soul , it doesn't happen often and it's not a continual state of being , most are happy with just sex. Sex is two people enjoying each others bodies. It can be done with or without emotional attachment. It can be fast or slow , rough or sweet , but both people are "involved" it the process. With sex there is always the holding a bit back of yourself, protecting yourself , the fear of letting a person in to close. Basically it's because you know that person will never accept the inner you , you remains within certain limits , certain boundaries that are acceptable to them, knowing that to cross those boundaries would be damaging to the soul. There is always a wall of defense, a holding back. Then there are times when you just f*ck . Both parties are consenting but usually one it doing it to please the other and not really interested in the whole event. Your either the f*ckee ( just hurry up and get it over with ) or the f*cker ( anything to get some relief ) . Sometimes you just f*ck each other , both needing release not really caring if the other achieves release or not. Most times emotions are not involved. I'm surprised that so many equate f*cking as sex .
    Making love ;)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,127 ✭✭✭STaN


    Originally posted by Giblet
    Sex is what you do when you're drunk and find out you woke up to a fat chick.

    Making love is when she is reall hot!

    LMAO!!

    bless you gibby :)

    Sex is with someone who you dont "love", and the other..







    guess :p


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,622 ✭✭✭Catsmokinpot


    Eddie Murphy said something along the lines of

    "i dont make love, i f*ck! making love is boring i would rather f*ck someone i love than make love to someone.... which would you rather hear 'Make love to me' or someone grabing you by the head and goin 'F*ck my brains out' "

    i think he was right :D f*cking is better than making love and having sex


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 302 ✭✭Grimlock


    Catsmokinpot Said:
    Eddie Murphy said something along the lines of:

    Yeah but Eddie Murphy likes lady-boys!

    So he's not someone i'd ever consider taking sexual advice from!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,208 ✭✭✭loismustdie


    i reckon that sex is when you're horny and makin love is when you feel the closeness and it's just nice, not that your turned on but it's lovey - that's not a good way to explain it an i'd say people will disagree but that's the way it feels for me. like i think you can make love with your girlfriend/bf one day and have sex with them the next...kinda


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 10,921 ✭✭✭✭Pigman II


    Sex is when it costs you before the deed.

    Making love is where you pay later.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,828 ✭✭✭ven0m


    The difference my friends is simple - how much you've both had to drink....

    nothing like a rough drunken shag if ye ask me... ;) gwaaaannn the nasty rough down dirty nasty sex........


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